//------------------------------// // 20 No More Princesses // Story: Twilight's 1000th Birthday Blowout // by Cyndaquil //------------------------------// Flurry Heart turned only to see Tempest Shadow charging at her, more like a bull then a unicorn, with her unnatural looking horn ready to impale her target. Most Equestrian unicorns don’t actually have sharp points on the tip of their horns. Tempest was an exception. The tip of her horn was unnaturally sharp, and about to connect with the very pupil of Flurry heart’s eye. The princess only had a small body. She aged slow. Though her mind had been thinking for over nine hundred years, her reactions were not much faster than you would expect from her outward appearance. She couldn’t jump out of the way. She barely had time to scream. Suddenly her small body was between the front and hind legs of another pony. In a single motion, this pony tucked Flurry Heart tightly between her legs and did a roll. Missing the point of Tempests horn by a mere tenth of a hoof, Flurry heart was moved to safety, and even landed back on her legs. She turned to see the pony who so heroically saved her, and was startled to see the same face, as that of the pony who tried to kill her. It wasn’t really the exact same face. This other Tempest had a kinder expression, with concern in her eyes, concern for Flurry Heart. She also had a broken horn, from which sparks occasionally fizzled. “Fizzy! Is that you?” Fizzlepop had visited the Crystal Empire a few times, and shown up to some events involving her Aunty Twilight. Fizzy, as only Flurry ever called her, gave a knowing wink, then turned serious. “Get out of here little one. Go to the tree of harmony. I’ll take care of my younger self.” “I’m not lit… never mind. You can’t handle her alone.” “Watch me” Having missed her target, Tempest crashed into an ice cream cart. She kicked the debris aside, turned, and looked to Flurry Heart with rage. “What do you want?” Flurry Heart demanded to know. “Your life!” “Then youse have gotta to go through me!” Screwball made a gesture, as though she was rolling up her sleeves. The prankster princess wasn’t actually wearing anything with sleeves, it was just a symbolic gesture, equivalent to telling somepony to put of their dukes. Twilight hovered downward. “And me!” She declared. Tempest realized she had lost all element of surprise. Her target now had some powerful allies to defend her. “Princess please,” Fizzlepop spoke humbly, “allow me to deal with her.” Twilight looked back and forth, from Tempest to Fizzlepop, then Fizzlepop to Tempest. “Is she your sister or something?” Fizzlepop realized it was no use explaining that they were the same pony from different points in her personal timeline. “She’s someone I’ve been fighting for a long time.” Twilight put a hoof on her friends shoulder. “Then maybe you should try to make peace with her.” Fizzlepop blushed slightly. Perhaps Twilight understands the situation better than she gave her credit for. At that moment, a blazing green fire emanated from the abnormal horn of Tempest Shadow. Ponies in the crowd oohed at the spectacle. A few may have wondered if this was some interactive show for the theme park, since they were certainly pouring on the theatrics. To her own surprise, Screwball dropped out of the sky, her beanie no longer supporting her in flight. “Don’t be alarmed!” Twilight called out. “I think she’s just using an umbrum trick to negate our magic.” “That’s pretty alarming youse know.” The magic lanterns of the park fizzled out. The green fire of Tempests attack was the only light to be seen, and so all eyes were focussed upon her. Most were cautious to approach her without magic, but Fizzlepop did not hesitate to step forward. Tempest eyed Fizzlepop curiously, moving her forehead to focus the green fire and examine every contour of Fizzlepop’s face. Her eyes finally settled on the broken horn. She stared at it, the way others had stared at her, the way that still annoyed Fizzlepop to this day. “Why are you doing this?” Fizzlepop asked. “Who are you?” Tempest demanded. “Did Twilight summon you with some sort of mirror spell?”
 “I’m you from your future,” Fizzlepop declared. She then looked back and forth. “Although, I don’t remember any of this happening before.” “You liar, You can’t be me! The umbrum fixed me.” Tempest sneered. “Just look at my beautiful horn.” Fizzlepop examined it for a moment. She wondered if her past self was enchanted or just very deluded. That thing was not the horn she remembered having as a foal. Tempest lunged, thinking she had the advantage. She fired a few blasts at Fizzlepop, who easily dodged. Tempest then leapt at Fizzlepop, intending to impale her with the sharp tip of her horn. In a move so fast that Tempest could not even see it, Fizzlepop used Tempest’s own momentum to propel her into a tree. In the place where Starlight Glimmer’s consciousness dwells, she yelped as a sudden sensation came upon her that in all her experience she could only compare to the feeling of being poked by something sharp in the derriere. Tempest was stuck. Ponies gathered around her backside, a few laughing at her predicament. However none expected the sheer savagery of what came next. Older ponies covered younger ponies eyes, Tempest screamed in rage and horror, and there was a collective gasp as Fizzlepop freed Tempest from the tree with a kick. The kick broke and shattered Tempests horn. It was awhile before anypony calmed down after that horrible sight. Finally somepony asked: “What do we do with her?” “Wipe her memory and return her to her own time.” Said Tempest. “Tempest, it’s forbidden to use memory wipe spells without the ponies consent.” “You have consent.” Everypony thought hard about that. None had a more difficult time with the concept then Twilight Sparkle. The Storm King huffed and puffed. “You’re a tough one, I’ll give you that, but no pony enters the time spire as long as I’m here.” There was a gust of wind as two streaks, one polychromatic and the other an elegant lavender, moved past him. He turned his head, trying to make sense of what had just happened. Priding himself on honour, Spike did not strike down the Storm King while his head was turned. Standing behind Storm King were Twilight Sparkle and Rainbow Dash. They had raced one another to see who could reach the time spire first. In a few moments Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Rainbow Dash were also seen rushing toward the spire. Spike had to block as Storm King tried to bring his sword down upon Fluttershy, none-the-less, all managed to get by him. “I totally beat you,” Rainbow Dash declared. “No way, I was first.” “Hey Spike, who did you see get here first.” “Uh…” Twilight said Hi to the storm king, told him he could get cake at the pavilion, and with the mane six she rushed into the time spire tower. After needing a moment to figure out what the heck just happened, Storm King realized that he done goofed. The giant yeti turned to stop them but suddenly Spikes sword struck at him Stom king barely moved in time for their swords to clash. “We’re not done yet.” Spike declared. Elsewhere, Silver Streak was handing out necklaces and tiara’s, items also known as the Elements of Harmony. “How are there so many of them?” Daisy asked. “The same way you have two of me, I suppose.” Fizzlepop answered. Flurry Heart dawned her tiara with pride. Before she left, Twilight had appointed her a bearer of the element of magic. She turned to Screwball. “Are you impressed cousin. Though countless ponies had used the other elements over the centuries, there were only a few bearers of the element of magic.” “That’s just cause momma Twi was always around to do the job.” Celestia helped clasp Screwballs element of laughter as she spoke. “Now now my little ponies, to be the bearer of any element of harmony is a great and rare honour.” “The great and powerful Trixie is here to claim her element.” “I don’t see you in any of the historical records.” Silver Streak told her. “Which element are you again?” “Mine is the greatest and most powerful one obviously.” Silver Streak handed her an element of magic tiara, then called “Next.” Fluttershy, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Applejack galloped at top speed, while Twilight and Rainbow Dash flew ahead of them. “Why didn’t you put an elevator in here?” Pinkie yelled. The time spire followed video game rules. You had to enter from the bottom and fight your way to the top. It had the best in magical defences and booby traps. Twilight defused most of them as she flew ahead, though Applejack still had to buck a few skeleton warriors. Twilight was cursing herself as she moved. She had overlooked the obvious. The enemy didn’t get to he top of the tower by having the most powerful magic, they did it by negating magic with that stupid changeling artifact. She never should have put the magic cancelling pebble in Fluttershy’s dressing room. Although, if she hadn’t then Discord might have seen his bride before the wedding. Which was worse? She wondered as she tricked a giant anaconda into tying itself into a knot. “So, toots, what’s the plan?” “Well,” said Flurry Heart, according to Aunty Twilight, the Umbrum from the future are behind most of what’s going on.” “Okay.” The Umbrum rule in the future, and they’re the ones who sent Tempest and Storm King as assassins to preserve their unstable timeline. “So the Um-bums ain’t gots the guts to attack us themselves.” “They’re probably just afraid of paradoxes.” “Right! Thats why we’ve gathered at the tree of harmony. How did Twilight get that here anyway. She wants to use most of the element bearers in history to… what… fight the Storm King.” “No we’re attacking the Umbrum.” “How are we doing that? Aren’t they sealed in another dimension or something?” Screwball turned her head. “See Fiendship is Magic issue #1 in an official hasbro licensed IDW comics miniseries folks.” She then gave a wink. Flurry Heart rolled her eyes. Chairpony Flim wiped a bead of sweat from his brow. It always made him nervous whenever he had a big switch to pull. With one tug of the switch, they would complete the predestination paradox. The Princesses would be sent a few years into the future. It wouldn’t harm them, it would just get them out of the way. They’d even greet them when they appear again. After all, nopony will ever know this was their doing. They weren’t bad ponies, it’s just that they wanted to complete their terms, and get their lifetime pensions. Princesses lived many lifetimes, surely they could afford to miss less then one itsy bitsy decade. What could possibly go wrong? Flim reached for the switch, though he seemed to be moving in slow motion. Annoyed, Flam pushed him aside. “Oh, I’ll do it!” “No, you said I could brother.” “Well, you’re taking too long. It doesn’t matter do does it, as long as it gets done.” “You said I could do it.” “Fine then, do it!” “Okay then” Chairpony Flim reached for the switch, again is slow motion. “Oh C’mon!” “Wait - don’t do it!” The two chairponies looked behind them at the narrow trap door entrance to the time spire. “I don’t know why you’re doing this, but trust me, it’s not gonna work out the way you want it too.” “Are youse sure this is a good idea.” “Sure I’m sure. We open a portal to the Umbrum dimension, then BANG! We zap them with all the elements of harmony, and I do mean all of them. Screwball turned her head. Lined up were hundreds of ponies. Not just any ponies, they were the kindest, most generous, most loyal, most honest, most magical and funniest ponies to grace Equestria for the past thousand years: Lily, Derpy, Daisy, Lyra Bon Bon, Tempest, Celestia, Roseluck, Derpy, Trixie (for some reason), Minty, and so many more. Screwball couldn’t deny she was awed by the amount of magical potential in the assembly. “Look, Doll, if I open the portal to the Umbrum realm and we fail, then it’s my fault they escape.” “I never thought of that.” “Well, mom put you in charge. So tell me great leader, should I open that portal?” “I’m sorry! I give up. Please don’t let Celestia banish me to the moon.” “You snivelling coward!” Flam kicked his brother aside, and reached for the switch. “So they knew about their plans. He’d just have to make Twilight disappear, then he could spend the next couple of years figuring out what to do with her when she reappears. Flam reached for the switch, but Rainbow Dash charged, knocking him out of the way. What’s brother doing. Flim thought. The other mane five aren’t even programmed into the machine. It’ll send the princesses to the future, like we wanted, and all the other ponies will go back to their own times, just like in the paradox, but those five will still be here. Seeing them hold down his brother, Flim ran for the door. “Wait!”, Twilight cried, grabbing his shirt from behind. Flim ripped the shirt off, still trying to escape. Now the room was a little bit small, and at that moment Flim jumped and accidently hit the light with his head. There was a spark, and a flash, then the room went dark. Flim managed to escape in the darkness, and in everyponies moment of surprise, Flam managed to slip free. Twilight took a step, but felt something, like a tiny stone had gotten caught in her golden horseshoe. That that moment there was a loud click. Flam had thrown the switch. Elsewhere a portal to the Umbrum realm was opened.