It was the sort of news that was a dime a dozen everywhere one looked: divorces, separations, and/or breakups. But at CHS, where it concerned both the school's most popular guy and the most aggravating alpha witch the facility ever had, it hit the student body like a hockey stick to the gut.
Which of course meant that I didn't find out about it until lunch the day after the Fall Formal.
"Come on, Puma," Rice Omelette complained in-between bites. "How did you not hear about it before now? Seriously, man."
I shrugged, still winding down from the shock. It was expected that I would be surprised about it: since Oak wasn't able to get the information I wanted on their friendship status, I wasn't able to act on it. So why did Flash take the initiative and cut ties with Sunset anyway?
"I'm assuming that having Sunset and Flash break up was your end goal in all of this, right?" Oak asked, to which I nodded. "Well, congratulations: you have her attention now. She was trying to ask me about you during the Formal."
"Wait, that's why she stopped me after and asked me about him?" Melodic Farms asked, realizing something a bit too late. "Because she guessed that Puma was responsible?"
"She went to talk to me, too," Rice confirmed. "I just thought she was desperate. I mean, she had just broken up with Flash, so..."
Oak had the decency to facepalm. "Rice, what girl in their right mind would try to hook up with Puma of all people? Just look at him. His mind wanders half the time, he's the heaviest guy in the freshman class and maybe the school, he's not exactly pretty to look at..." He stopped himself short, giving me an apologetic look. "Um, sorry."
"Don't be," I said as I grinned, or at least tried to. For some reason, one side of my mouth never wants to fully smile when the other side does, making it look unfinished. Add another reason to the pile as to why I don't do it much.
"But now I'm wondering. Puma, you pack light lunches while I go for the bigger ones, and somehow you're almost twice my size. How does that even work?..."
For the time being at least, we turned our attention to lighter topics and shut out the rest of the world. Shame I couldn't say the same for the queen bee: I didn't know this, obviously, but it wouldn't be long before she hit the ground running.
The following week...
To outward appearances, Sunset Shimmer was merely using one of the library's computers for an assignment during her free period. The website she was on, which gave a general overview of the events that led up to the Amareican Revolution, was meant to encourage that assumption. In reality, she wasn't really seeing any of it; mentally, she was reviewing information on her latest project: Puma Claw.
Which, she admitted silently, could be considered a minor battle in itself depending on how this plays out.
Some of what she had gathered had been obtained from Snips and Snails, who'd made a few discreet inquiries to classmates who had apparently known Puma for most of his school life. Sunset herself had approached his group's apparent leader, Oak Branch, for details during the Fall Formal, but had been flat-out rejected. She'd wisely backed off at the time instead of making a scene, opting to consult Rice Omelette and Melodic Farms afterward. Neither of the two possessed Oak's sharp mind, and she'd played nice long enough to get the info she needed.
She'd stayed away from Solvent and Tenant, though. The former was almost as quiet as Vinyl Scratch, kept to himself and seemed to be aware of more than he let on, while the latter was almost uncannily similar to an easygoing, friendly, and possibly mentally challenged colt she'd known prior to being discovered by Princess Celestia. She'd deal with both eventually if they caused her problems, but for now she had bigger fish to fry.
Much bigger.
Let's see, now. From what they said, Puma has a rather unhealthy obession with cats... not a surprise, given his name. His grades run the full gamut, ranging from As in English and computer classes clear down to Cs and Ds in science and math. Is below average at all sports except basketball, at which he does reasonably well; it is noted that he rejected an offer to try out for a team, citing low grades and interference with his personal schedule. Struggles to get to school on time in the mornings, which I can kind of identify with. Has regular RPG sessions with the people he sits with at lunch. Sunset shook her head. Nerd.
Anyway... he has four older siblings, all of whom are alumni of this school and the last of which graduated just this past calendar year... right before I started here, come to think of it. Puma is a social misfit, and interactions with those outside his circle of friends range from polite at best to antagonizing at worst. Hates spiders and insects, loud noises, and being randomly teased out of nowhere. Drinks soda pop like no one's business, primarily Haygo whenever the stores are able to stock it. Hates unnecessary work, but will usually bring himself to do it anyway just to avoid an argument. Is prudish as all get out.
Sunset tapped her chin in thought, scrolling down the webpage a little to keep up appearances. Now, how best to get Puma under my thumb with this information? None of what I have is truly "incriminating"... if anything, it's all casual trivia. But with situations like this, being able to read between the lines comes in handy... and I think there's a few different ideas I can try.
Plan A: I appeal to Puma's cat obsession by giving him links to galleries of kitten pictures. If he starts thinking that I enjoy looking at them as well, it will be easier to get on his good side and get his forgiveness for bothering Fluttershy. If it works out, then conceivably I could talk him into doing occasional work for me; he looks like he'd make a decent powerhouse to back up Snips and Snails. If that doesn't work out and he refuses to take the bait, spreading the rumor that he responded to a friendship offer by being mean would cause his already low reputation to take a serious hit.
Plan B: Offer to tutor Puma in math and science. If he accepts and his grades start to go up, he'll likely be more appreciative towards my efforts. Possibly he'd help me out later if I made a show of needing it, maybe even when the portal opens next year. If he accepts but there's no positive change in his grades, people may start to think that he only wants me instead of my knowledge. If he refuses entirely, word will go around that he doesn't care about his academic performance, giving him less credibility from his peers' perspectives. It's win-win.
Sunset jotted down a few notes on a piece of scrap paper. Plan C: Work the blackmail front. Get Snails to spy on Puma to ascertain his locker combination. If he does that RPG thing as often as they say, embarassing situations are likely to have cropped up at some point or another. Any information on that is likely to be stored in his locker when he's not at lunch, if what they heard about the content is true.
Plan D: Find out who hates Puma the most and why. Get on his or her good side and provide incentive to have their game stepped up, then feign ignorance if I'm ratted out. A convincing enough performance will hit morale and reputation for both parties, leaving me in the clear.
Plan E: Manipulate enough entry sheets to get Puma involved in the next "Mr. Canterlot" competition in November. If he's as much of a misfit as Fluttershy is, he'll go to pieces when the attention is on him. Simple and to the point.
Sunset nodded in satisfaction, took a few more notes, then closed the browser she was working with and vacated to a spare desk. Those will do for now. There's no shortage of possibilities, but if even one of these five works, I can focus on more important things.
Suppressing a yawn, she looked around. The librarian was tending to the front desk, but otherwise the library was mostly empty. Not having anything pressing that needed taken care of, Sunset decided that taking a nap was the best way to pass the rest of her free period, dozing off with her head and arms on her desk.
That fictional cat was right. Mornings do start too early in the day.
It took Sunset a bit of time to find a decent animal gallery online. It wasn't that there was any real shortage of them around, but for maximum impact she needed one that full-on oozed cuteness as opposed to just radiating it. It wasn't until she found a photo of a litter of silver tabby kittens sleeping alongside a confused Bull Mastiff outdoors on a blanket that she decided that she had what she was looking for.
She was grateful that no one she knew or recognized was nearby. It would be difficult to explain away the squeal she made in a way that didn't make her look like a bleeding heart or musophobic.
Now all that was needed to be done was wait for Puma to show up to programming class and make the offer to him. And that was what Sunset did: she leaned against a locker next to the door and waited, ignoring those that passed her and keeping her eyes open for a fourteen-wheeler with a crew cut.
Tick.
Tock.
Tick.
Tock.
...
It was after a few minutes of humming passed that she came to the realization that something was wrong. What's taking him so long? I thought he was usually one of the first to get here!
Quickly losing patience, Sunset put on her 'nice face' and addressed a passing student. As she made her inquiry, she took a mental step back when she recognized him as Lieutenant Tenant. "Excuse me, but have you seen Puma Claw at all today?"
"Um, no," the freshman said, unsure of why she wanted to know. "I heard he had to leave early today."
The 'nice face' faltered. "How early is 'early'?"
"Right after second hour. Someone threw that huge bag of his into the showers during gym class, so... the gym teacher and the Principal sent him home to dry everything off. Hope that helps."
...
Outwardly, Sunset was smiling apologetically and dismissing Tenant, letting him go about his business. Inwardly, she was becoming increasingly angry. What the actual---
"Hello, Sunset," Snips' voice cut in. "Uh, why do you look so mad?"
"It's nothing," Sunset quickly said to save face, turning around and heading into class. "Don't worry about it."
Snips scratched the back of his head in confusion, then shrugged and went on his way. As soon as she figured his back was turned, Sunset angrily wadded up the website address and chucked it at the wastebasket before huffily storming to her seat, glaring at nothing.
...
...
Fluttershy entered the classroom with moments to spare before class began. Seeing the little scrap of paper near the wastebasket, she started to throw it away before curiosity drove her to give the writing on it a closer look.
As it turned out, the picture galleries that the website would lead her to after school were just what she needed to cheer up after a long day.
The next day...
Of course, Sunset would have been foolish if she didn't try again when Puma would be in class. What she didn't anticipate is how quickly her offer would be turned down: as soon as she produced another piece of paper with the same website shown, he took one look at what was written and ripped it to shreds.
With that done, he brushed a few fragments off his pant legs and shook his head at Sunset. "No, thank you."
"Come on, Puma. You don't even know what's on that website! How could you reject it that quickly?"
Puma frowned. "Easy. Like this: no, thank you. Am I supposed to believe that there isn't a virus or malware associated with that? I'd rather not risk my dad's computer, if you don't mind." In a quieter voice, he muttered: "Dad's already been on my case once about it as it is."
"There were galleries of cats on that page!" Sunset was quick to protest, beginning to lose her cool. "What harm could they possibly do?"
"I fail to see how dogs that abuse kittens could enjoy that sort of thing, queen bee," Puma drawled, opening up his favorite typing program to get some practice in before class began.
With a not inconsiderable amount of will, Sunset forced down her anger and turned away from him back towards her computer. "Suit yourself," she warned. "Just remember that I tried to be nice."
If the teacher hadn't walked in at that moment, Puma's muttered reply of "don't strain yourself" would have caused Sunset to be suspended from school via getting a fist stuck through her monitor.
...Well, that was a complete and total wash. Aside from me overestimating the degree to which Puma liked cats, I guess students aren't as quick to believe rumors as I used to think.
Or it isn't so much that they don't believe them as it is they aren't inclined to care. From the looks of things, this is a recurring thing with Puma: he's had trouble in the past discerning fact from fiction, and people seem to have this thing with leading him along by the nose only to trick him in some way. Sometimes he's aware of it, other times he's not, but either way they seem to prefer mockery and teasing over direct antagonism.
And to top it off, I'd thought those muscles of his were pythons at first glance. Turns out they're more like over-satiated garter snakes. Way to go, me: you've put off getting your eyes checked for the last time!
On that note, how much do they charge for eye doctor appointments around here? Maybe I should consider getting contacts...
...
...Nah.
Next Monday...
With someone as focused on life and agendas as Sunset, there was no room for error: there were more things she had to deal with than just Puma Claw. It was most of another week before she was able to carry out the next plan on her list, meeting up with him after school just after he'd finished transferring unneeded books from his duffel bag to his locker.
It hadn't been easy for her, admittedly. Sunset had a long memory when it came to failures and slights, and thinking about her first plan crashing and burning was liable to push her temper to the edge. It took considerable force of will to stay polite long enough to get the job done.
"...In light of what happened last week I normally wouldn't do this," Sunset explained. "But the school counselor seems to think I have a future in teaching, so he asked me to try something to see if I have any sort of aptitude for it."
Which was an outright lie: she hadn't seen the counselor since her first year here. Her target didn't need to know that, though.
Puma eyed Sunset cautiously. It was clear that he hadn't forgotten what happened the last time they talked to each other. "What is it?"
Sunset adopted her most disarming smile, trying to look as well-meaning as possible. "I was wondering, Puma: how would you like to---"
"Yeah, hold that pose," Sunset agreed... then did a double-take, eyes widening. Wait, I didn't say that---!
And that was all she had time for before she was faced with a picture-taking force of nature. A 9th-grade math book was shoved into her hand as Photo Finish, who was looking on from down the hall and decided that Sunset was looking remarkably photogenic in the midst of the latter's faux concern, decided to commemorate the occasion as only she knew how. Feeling just this side of overwhelmed (and knowing from past experience that when Photo Finish decided to blitz someone, there was no stopping her), Sunset played along in the hopes that it would make her go away that much quicker.
"YES, look nice as possible!" Flash.
"NO, look fierce like tigress!" Flash.
"ONE SIDE, ze setting sun!" Flash.
"OTHER SIDE, you're no morning person!" Flash.
"Ze future of this generation is in your hands!" Flash.
"When ze lights go down on ze school and ze sun shines, will you be there?!" Flash. Flash.
"You will! You won't! Yes! Journey! Yes! Journey!"
Flash.
Flash.
Flash.
Flash.
"ENOUGH! I go."
Sunset blinked repeatedly in a vain effort to get the spots out of her eyes as Photo Finish zipped off, taking the math book with her. Stars above, I hate it when she does that. She shook her head and re-adopted her previous smile. "Sorry about that. Anyway, Puma, how'd you like to..."
No sign of CHS's resident potato-shaped freshman. A brief look around confirmed that the hall was empty. "...hold still long enough for me to nail your shoes to the floor?" Sunset finished through gritted teeth, realizing that the photographer's overeagerness had scared him off. How in BLAZES did he manage to take off without me noticing? I'm sorry, but people his size do not move about that quietly!
Useless Trivia: When I was still in elementary school, my oldest sister already had her own apartment. The floor in it creaked whenever I walked on it, and I was afraid that it would break beneath me and send me falling (though granted, my fears were unfounded). So, I got into the habit of putting down as little of my weight as possible whenever I walked around.
As a side effect, I became able to move around more quietly than you'd expect of someone of my size. On multiple occasions I've managed to startle others---up to and including my parents---much to my befuddlement, as I didn't feel I was being particularly stealthy. Eventually I was able to figure out that being cautious as to how I walked had become second nature to me, to the point where I'd stopped thinking about it.
That incident with the crazy photographer made me put that little skill to good use for the first time. I was genuinely spooked by how enthusiastic she was with her work, but more than that I wanted nothing to do with whatever it was Sunset was offering. Skedaddling while I still could was just common sense, and I was already at my usual exit by the time I heard the photographer's distant voice say that she was done.
Sunset had something planned. I just couldn't figure out what.
Photo Finish looked over the pictures she'd taken of Sunset and the hapless underclassman she was talking to. Like anyone who'd been attending CHS long enough, she knew about the kinds of games Sunset liked to play. Judging from the poor sap's unsure expression, she could only surmise that the victim-to-be didn't. Must you be zuch a killjoy, Shimmer? Let him keep his innozence a little longer, yah?
She singled out two of the photographs for her instructor to consider for inclusion in the school yearbook, set them aside... and proceeded to rip up the rest, tossing the mangled remains in her kitchen wastebasket. Unlike Sunset, Photo Finish had seen the freshman making his escape. If she could get away without telling anyone she'd seen his plight and had decided to help him the best way she could, wondrous.
If people feel that I, Photo Finish, am a flake, far be it from me to ruin their expectations. Za magicks have not failed me yet!
The following Thursday...
Prior to starting high school, I'd never been to any school functions or the like. It's not like there weren't any: the middle school I went to occasionally had parties and such in the cafeteria after classes ended, and there were events like spelling bees, talent shows, and Halloween costume exhibitions as well. No, being at those sorts of events didn't appeal to me.
Irritably, pep rallies held during class hours were mandatory, so I had no choice but to attend my first one in October. I was thankful that I wasn't obligated to attend the secondary one held after school, which was significantly more in-depth.
There were mildly entertaining skits by the students, one of whom had curly pink hair and was previously speculated by my friends to be a touch insane. There were speeches by several teachers and the sibling principals, talking about important events, student performances, things of that nature. One upperclassman who was rather keen on school loyalty--couldn't see her too well from where I was sitting, but I was sure she had seven-colored hair--led us all in a systematic cheer: freshmen first, then sophomores, juniors, seniors, then all of us at once.
I cheered with the rest, but my heart wasn't really in it. And thanks to the sheer volume, neither were my vocal cords: I was left unable to speak without coughing for the next half hour. I promised myself afterwards that even if I had to go to these rallies, I was never going to actively partake in them again.
For some reason, I didn't see any flaming hair where all the 10th-graders were seated. I didn't like it, but I wasn't going to speculate why.
During lunchtime, I was called to the Vice Principal's office. While there, I learned of a minor incident that had taken place earlier that morning...
Sunset checked up and down both hallways, making sure no one was present: virtually everyone was at the pep rally, but it didn't hurt to be careful. In the distance, she could hear the student body roaring in approval as Rainbow Dash got them worked up over the upcoming Homecoming game. She smiled and nodded: the path was clear.
Walking up to Puma's locker without fear, she turned the dials in the order she'd been given by her eavesdropping cohorts. ...There. Let's see what we've got! She pulled the door open...
"CAT LOVES FOOD, YEH-YEAH YEAH YEAH---"
Yelping in surprise as lyrics were spontaneously belted at her, Sunset slammed the door shut. As if prompted, the song abruptly cut off. Her eyes flicked from side to side anxiously, and she breathed a quiet sigh when no one went to investigate the disturbance. What... what was that about? What was that?!
Across the city, outside Crystal Prep...
Sour Sweet smiled down at her smartphone, a gesture that didn't reach her heart. "You're a nice piece of uncooperative technology, yes you are," she cooed. "Now be a dear and stop misdialing my mom's phone number!"
"You and I both know that you're dialing fast enough to hit the wrong buttons; it's hardly the phone's fault. Now stop talking to that thing like it's your companion cube and try again," Sugarcoat chastised her, wondering not for the first time why she had been the one tasked with seeing her classmate off.
"You bet your motor mouth I will," Sour snarled, already setting to work.
Bracing herself, Sunset slowly turned the lock and opened the door again...
"CAT LOVES FOOD, YEH-YEAH YEAH YEAH! CAT LOVES FOOD, YEH-YEAAAHHH!..."
This time, instead of backing off at the blaring song, she quickly scanned the locker for any signs of what she was looking for. There wasn't much there, just a few textbooks from classes likely meant for later that day. There weren't any folders or binders kept in there, and the locker itself was devoid of any sort of decorations or identifying marks. And of course, there was the cellphone sitting on the shelf singing its non-existent head off.
Sunset shook her head. Well, that was a complete wash. I guess that huge bag he likes to carry around really isn't just for show. She gave the textbooks an appraising look. Still, I wonder---
"Hello. Please leave your message after the tone," a friendly pre-recorded voice spoke up, cutting off the obnoxious ringtone.
Sunset paused. Ignoring the possibility of Puma being too lazy to record a greeting of his own, there was the chance that she could glean a detail or two of what he was like outside of school if she listened in---
"Hello, Mom? This is Sour Sweet," an overly friendly, almost saccharine voice said over the phone, killing that hope instantly. "Sorry for bothering you. I was wondering something..." And then the voice shifted to a full-on screech that blasted at Sunset's ears even from several feet away. She was certain that the entire locker was vibrating. "I'm standing outside the school, and you said you'd pick me up to meet my psychiatrist this morning! Where the flying &@$¦%^╬ are you?!..."
Sunset wasted no additional time, closing the locker and hastily retreating as whoever that was on the phone launched into a tirade. No, she forcefully told herself. Whoever that is, I want no part of it!
...
It turned out to be for the best that Sunset wasn't more thorough in her search, unnerved as she was by the ringtone and Sour's message. Taped to one side of the locker and hidden from sight by the books were several illustrations, depicting events that had taken place in one of Puma and his friends' role-playing sessions. While it wasn't a given that they'd be of any use to Sunset, they would've still made Puma look fairly ridiculous when taken out of context.
...
A short while later, as students began to return to the halls after the rally ended, the locker-based duet of Yamcha and a harpy finally got someone's attention. Puma, already armed with the books he'd need for the rest of the morning, never turned up to investigate. The VP, on the other hand...
"...And you're positive you don't know who that caller was?" Luna asked as she looked over my cell phone's records.
"Yes," I said, feeling ill at ease in the Vice Principal's office. I liked dark rooms, don't get me wrong, but I still felt like I was in trouble for something I wasn't aware of.
"There's no one enrolled here by that name, so given the relative age and the local area code I can only imagine that it was someone from Crystal Prep," Luna mused aloud. One corner of her eye twitched. "...Someone more anxious to meet their therapist than is really healthy. She left ten messages on your phone chewing out her mother for not picking her up from school." She looked up at me. "I don't need to tell you to either keep your phone set on Silent or else leave it at home, do I?"
"Any e-excuse to prove to my parents t-that I didn't need that thing a-after all," I agreed, shivering as I accepted my "punishment" (such as it was).
"Good. Meantime, I'll get in contact with their faculty and get this straightened out," Luna said with a smile before she returned my phone and subsequently dismissed me.
...
...
After Puma left, Luna flicked the lights back on and dialed up Crystal Prep, softly humming to herself as she waited for Dean Cadence to answer. "Cat loves food, yeh-yeah yeah yeah..."
Later in October, at the local mall...
Sunset took a few moments to give the person who greeted her an appraisal: lemon-colored skin, short magenta-shaded spiky hair, slightly rounded face on an otherwise average figure, a T-shirt advertising a prominent pro wrestling league, and a wristband with a spiralling silver star on his right arm. So this is the kid who likes making Puma's life problematic, huh?
"- - -from that skinny snail kid you wanted to see me," Dallas Austin was saying. "Sunset Shimmer, right?"
Sunset nodded. "The one and only. Did Snails tell you why?"
"Just that it was about Puma." Dallas smirked. "You're not gonna tell me to stop, queen bee?"
That nickname's been going around an awful lot. It's not a bad thing, but it's still not my first choice. "No. If anything, I want you to ramp it up. Do not give him a moment's rest as long as the both of you are on school grounds. As long as it won't get you caught by the staff, then anything's fair game."
Dallas stared at Sunset with incomprehension for a few moments before his smirk returned. "Oh-ho, I get it now. He got you mad, didn't he? What, did he catch a cold and wouldn't stop snorting in class? ...'Cause that's how he got me mad. Wasn't sure if it was the same with you."
Juvenille and petty. I should've expected it. "More or less. Are you up for it?"
Dallas gave her a mock salute. "Always am, chief," he said before turning and walking away.
The little filly of yester-year would've been frightened by the smile that framed Sunset's face. As she was now, she was delighted with it. Now all that's left to do is to sit back and watch the fireworks.
...Hmm. Come to think of it, I'm running low on popcorn.
The next day...
"Hey Puma, my man! What's up!"
Oh please, not now, I grumbled mentally as I finished my business at my locker. Today had felt longer than usual, and I wanted nothing more than to get home and hide from the rest of the world. "Yeah? What is it, Dallas? I gotta get home."
"This won't take long," he promised. "I heard that you got this book about the Portland Trail Blazers. Can I look at it?"
"No," I said as I shut my locker and walked off down the hall.
As stubborn as he was, Dallas wasn't going to leave me alone just because I said a single word. He kept pace with me as I headed toward the lobby. "Aw, c'mon! Just a peek? I won't damage it, I swear!"
"I said 'no'," I stated a bit loudly. I yanked my bag away when Dallas tried reaching for the zipper. "Stop that."
"Dude, just let me see the book," Dallas said, visibly starting to get angry. Behind him, I could see some other students starting to gather around as the confrontation got their attention. "You don't need to be so greedy about it."
<i>Do I seriously look like a kettle to you, muffin man?</i> "You're just going to steal it or rip it up. Just go away."
"Yeah? How do you know I'm going to take it and keep it? Are you psychic or something?" Dallas asked, still trying to open the bag and get the book.
"Because that's what you're trying to do right now!" I tore the bag out of his grasp one more time, deciding that the only way I was going to get away from him was to make a break for it.
I didn't get too far, though: Dallas caught up to me before I managed four steps down the hall. Off to one side I noticed Sunset Shimmer leaning against a wall, idly chewing popcorn as she watched things play out. Really? That old cliche?
The struggle didn't last long, likely because we were both trying to avoid the attention of any teachers that hadn't left their classrooms yet. "Look," I said with a grimace. "You want this book so badly? Here. Just take it!" I took out the book in question and slammed it into Dallas's hands, disgusted. That's thirty dollars I'm never going to get back.
Dallas looked over the book's cover, suddenly looking unsure. "This is it? This is the one? I thought this was one of those five dollar deals from last year's book fair. You're not holding out on me, are ya?"
"That cost me a lot more than five dollars, trust me," I snarled. "I grew up watching the Trail Blazers. You expect me to be cheap about it?"
"...Huh." Dallas took a few moments to thumb through the book. "Cool." He made as if to put the book in his backpack...
...then immediately spun in the opposite direction and chucked the book at Sunset, much to both my surprise and hers.
Sunset's eyes widened to the fullest at Dallas's action. Dropping her popcorn, she slammed her hands together and caught the hardcover book between them. Her internal tea kettle started whistling when she realized that it had come barely half a foot from catching her in the throat. Why, of all the little... "Dallas. Freaking. Austin," she uttered, her voice threatening to catch fire. She let go of the book and let it fall to the floor. "You're going to pay for that, and I don't mean in cash."
To his credit, the bully was doing a good job of ignoring the situation he was in. "What, you didn't think what I did was funny?" he asked with a smirk.
"No person in their right mind would think that was funny," Sunset hissed as she started towards him. "You and I have a date in the Principal's office. C'mere!"
"^!(^ђ*# you, Shimmercakes!" Dallas shouted cheerfully as he took off running, quickly losing himself in a crowd of students with stunned-fish expressions.
Sunset contemplated pursuing him and laying down the law, but decided he would keep for later. Besides that, she had glimpsed Vice Principal Luna already heading in his direction at a brisk walk, likely intending to read Dallas the riot act for his behavior. After glaring down the hall with enough heat to figuratively burn through walls, Sunset relaxed her expression and walked away, shaking her head and pretending that everyone were dust mites beneath her boots. I don't know what's worse: that my intention to use him as an extra lackey backfired, or that he's acting the same way Lightning Dust did before she moved out of town. Wonder if he could end up being a threat to my position at some point...
...Eh, not likely. He may be this side of mean-spirited, but it doesn't seem like he always thinks things through. If he had, he'd likely be more satisfied with his antagonism of Puma instead of lumping me in along with him. I have to wonder if he even pays attention to the social norms around here, or if he thinks they don't matter so long as he gets to live his life the way he wants.
In any event...
A look to the left.
A look to the right.
...
"Well, if she's not going to have it..." I said to myself, picking up both my book and the bag of popcorn Sunset had dropped, helping myself to the latter's contents as I left for home. The afternoon was looking up already.
A few weeks later...
The "Mr. Canterlot" competition, hosted every November in CHS's gymnasium, was devoted entirely to the oddities of the male mind. It consisted of three rounds:
First, the competitors would be asked a series of questions about how they enjoyed their time at school, their hobbies, post-graduation plans, their ultimate goals in life, that sort of thing. On the whole it was relatively tame, and it allowed others a different kind of look at those they thought they knew.
The second round was basically a talent show, where the guys were allowed to show off something or other that they enjoyed doing or otherwise were very good at. Points were allotted for creativity.
The third and final round was pure eye candy. Much to the delight of any girls present, the guys would attempt to show off just how awesome they looked in swim trunks. Yes, that's really a thing.
Sunset was loathe to admit it, but the third round had always been her favorite. The downside of being a grownup in a teenager's body was that the desires of the mind and the hormones of the temple tended to clash, and the first time she'd set eyes on the competition the desires never stood a chance. Flash had been a nice guy even before then, but it was last year's contest that convinced her that he would be the one she'd latch on to if she wanted to be well-known.
'The mind is a plaything of the body,' she wryly quoted to herself as she sat in the gymnasium and waited for the show to begin.
I fixed my computer screen with a glare as I tried my hand once again at one of my brother's old games. "Look, you idiot," I growled irritably, "you're not supposed to wander into the glowing green poisonous crystals. The sandbags are there for a reason, you know!"
"Puma?" my Mom called from elsewhere in the house. "Who are you talking to?"
"Just complaining to myself, Mom!" I called back, waiting until I received confirmation from her before returning my attention to the game.
...Just in time as the villager once again decided to wander into a tiberium patch and buy a farm there, so to speak. "Your mission was a failure," the game told me.
"Oh, for crying out loud...!"
The next day...
Sunset slammed her locker shut and stormed off, not bothering to tell Snails 'thanks, good-bye' after receiving an answer to her inquiry. Of course. Of course! That plan was supposed to be simple and to the point! How was I supposed to know that Puma was best friends with the freshman class president? That would've given him enough pull to have Puma's name stricken from the entry list!
... Her face contorted a little and turned a bit green. Immediately she reversed course and made a detour for the nearest restroom. On second thought, maybe it's for the best that he didn't compete. There are some mental images that I can do without!
"...Ms. Redheart?"
"Ah, Sunset Shimmer. Something wrong? You don't sound too good."
"Throat hurts. Feeling kinda sick."
"I can help with that. What happened? Did you catch a cold?"
"No. Got a mental image of an obese guy in swim trunks. Felt like throwing up."
"...And so you did?"
"Yeah. Violently."
"..."
"..."
"Maybe it's best if you don't attend next year's Mr. Canterlot."
"I'm so down with that idea."
Sunset left Nurse Redheart's office a few minutes later, massaging her throat and hoping that the cough syrup she was given kicked in quickly.
So... none of my plans for Puma have worked out so far. There was always a possibility of that happening, but I didn't think it would actually come about. Underestimations of his cluelessness, random chance, and to a lesser extent a lack of knowledge have conspired to thwart me up until now. That last one is easily remedied, but still... how does one cheat against a guy who doesn't even know the rules?
Her self-imposed dilemma bothered her all the way back to her home, and continued to do so even as she tried to study for her next test. Sunset was bothered by her failures so far; they were little things, sure, but as far back as she could remember she'd always been like that. Anything that she saw as a failure when she was young, even if it was something as minute as using her fledgling telekinesis to try watering a plant and having some of it spill off to the side, grated at her temper until it could be dealt with.
The easiest thing to do would be to just forget about Puma and move on, focusing her efforts elsewhere. He was just one person, and a fool at that. Connection to the class president aside he was hardly influential, nor did he seem to care. But therein lay the problem with striving for perfection: as someone who was destined for greatness, Sunset could hardly let things go just like that...
...
She sighed, looking down at her bed and her scattered notes she'd taken of her textbook's latest chapter. Sadly, my history homework isn't just going to finish itself. Mr. Jefferson, you may have done a lot of good for this country, but Tartarus if writing an essay about your Declaration of Independence isn't a pain in the tail.
Setting aside her vendetta until a day when she wasn't swamped in homework, Sunset picked up her notes and got back to work. She may not have planned to stay on this side of the mirror for more than another ten months or so, but she liked to think she still had some pride as an academic.
...
...
Cat loves food, yeh-yeah yeah yeah...
...
Facepalm. Blast it.