Twilight considered Sunset's lunch tray. She wasn't the only one; apparently there was a growing Internet subcommunity who tried to use Sunset's dietary choices as a way to tell the future. Aside from foretelling what she was about to eat, it worked about as well as any other fortune telling method.
As Sweetie Belle walked by, Twilight mentally amended that to any other nonmagical fortune telling method. She was still getting used to that exception.
She shook her head and refocused on Sunset's tray. "I take it this is another digestive cheat, like the hay sandwich you brought in last week?"
Sunset smirked. "Don't knock it 'til you try it." Her expression shifted to a small, confused frown, "But seriously, what do you mean? I got a salad today."
"Yes. A salad and five cupcakes. You can't tell me that you maintain that figure on that kind of diet without some kind of magic getting involved."
Sunset shrugged. "Seriously not sure what you mean, Twi. I've got all the major food groups: Greens, carbs, chocolate..."
Pinkie beamed. "I like this food pyramid!"
Twilight felt an eyelid twitch. She drew in a breath for a full-tilt rant, but let it go when she noticed Rarity shaking her head. "Don't bother, darling," Rarity sighed. "Sunset's always been able to eat like this. It was one of the things I most despised about her back during her less pleasant days."
"It was just about the one thing I didn't!" said Pinkie.
Twilight looked around the table and got confirming nods from everyone else. She put her hands to her temples. "Okay, just... what?"
"I feel like I'm missing something," said Sunset.
Rainbow Dash quirked an eyebrow. "You ever hear the phrase 'empty calories'?"
"Of course. I remember when Empty Calorie was named Royal Baker. The princess wept tears of joy as she knighted him with a ceremonial pie server."
Applejack looked into her eyes long enough to make more than half of the table uncomfortable before giving a low whistle. "Shoot, you ain't kiddin', are ya?"
"Princess Celestia took baked goods very seriously."
The rest of the table took a few moments to process that. Twilight broke the silence. "I take it that baked goods are a staple of the pony diet?"
Sunset gave a slow nod, confusion still clear on her face. "Yeah. And here."
"How long have you spent in the vicinity of Pinkie Pie?"
Everyone looked at the girl in question, who was idly decorating Sunset's cupcakes with sprinkles that she hadn't had a moment earlier. Probably. "Okay, yeah," said Sunset, "I guess that would skew the available data. But what's your point?"
Applejack sighed. "Sugar makes normal humans fat, Sunset."
Horror slowly worked its way across Sunset's face. "What?"
"What?" echoed Pinkie.
"I did say 'normal.'"
"Oh yeah!"
"It's more like excess calories make humans fat as the body puts the unused energy into long-term storage and baked goods are incredibly calorie-dense," added Twilight, "but that's the gist of it, yes."
Sunset shrugged. "I guess my pony metabolism carried over. Still, magic's a lot more calorie-intense than you might think. You've probably all noticed that by now."
After this got several blank looks, Fluttershy said, "We are teenagers. We were already hungry all the time."
"Point. But still, why would you make so much sugary food if you don't need that energy and it's not full of vital gluconutrients?"
Twilight leaned into her. Like a friend. That was definitely something friends did. "This is one of those times where you're having trouble understanding something disharmonious, isn't it?"
Sunset mutely nodded, tears beginning to well in her eyes.
"It's okay, Sunset. Humans don't always make the best choices in life, that's all."
"So do ponies not get diabetes or what?" said Dash.
Sunset blinked. "Dia-what now?"
That night, she wept for the collective pancreases of mankind.