//------------------------------// // S1 E2: Sharing the Past // Story: My Little Ponytales // by Rainbow Sparkle //------------------------------// Night quickly descended upon Equestria, the moon taking the place of the sun as the natural cycle continued under the watchful eyes of the returned Princess Luna and her loving sister Princess Celestia. Raising the Sun and Moon, however, were not the only duties that both Royal Sisters possessed. Celestia helped bless the lands with fertility so that the Equestrian farmers would be able to grow whatever they needed for themselves, their families, and for the rest of Equestria. Luna however was tasked with something much more, intimate in some ways and very special to her alone. She was the Guardian of Dreams, The Protector From the Nightmares, the dark things that dwell within us all. It was her job to aid the sleeping citizens of Equestria to face the darkest thoughts in their mind when night fell, and lay their heads to sleep. And this applied to all those in Equestria who dreamed, including their newest citizens. The Monsters of the Underground. The strange Kingdom of creatures that many in Equestria had never seen the likes of. Some were cute and cuddly, others were things that one can only imagine in their dreams or even nightmares. But just because some were dreamlike, or even horrific to look at, did not mean that they too didn't have their own dreams and night terrors to face. And right now there was one monster of the underground in particular who was dealing with a nightmare that kept coming night, after night, after night. And on this night Princess Luna was determined to help him face the demons that resided in his dreams. That monster... was Prince Asriel Dreemurr. -*- It was happening again. One moment he was hugging his mother, enjoying another wonderful day with her in the kitchen preparing a meal for the rest of the family. The next she had a slash across her chest, dust slowly falling from her form with a look of pain and betrayal on her face. Then she would dissolve and fade away into nothingness, her soul floating there for but an instant before it too would crack and splinter into several pieces, joining the pile before him. He would look down and see not hands or paws, but the small leaves and petals of his prior form. The form of Flowey, that hellish form in which he had no soul, no compassion, no love. The form that he had been forced to endure for years with no respite, one there to truly help him get what he needed, no, what he wanted most. It was the form he hated the most, the form that he never wanted to see or exist as ever again. It was a piece of his past that he very much wished he could let go of. And yet, night after night for the last week it had returned again and again to show him the crimes of his past. To remind him of the sins that crawl down his back, to taunt him with the freedom that he finally had now that he once again had a soul. It was as if something inside him was trying to tell him that he did not deserve this, that he shouldn't be able to feel compassion, empathy, love and kindness... that at heart he was nothing more than a demon. Asriel could hear that flower’s haunting cackle echoing in the void of darkness around him as he saw the faces of the ones he loved and held close form a circle around him. Pain, anguish, sorrow, and hatred etched into their faces in a blur of emotions as he in his Flower form, not his true goat monster form, cut them down one by one. And what was worse, here in this nightmare, was that Asriel had no choice. There was nothing he could do! Even as he fought the urge, even as he tried to resist the call to murder, to kill, it did not stop the vines from lashing out. Nor did it stop the little white bullets I'm smacking into those he loved. It was almost as if someone else was controlling him. Yet he knew that wasn't the case, for these weren't mere night terrors. These were not images that were conjured up by his mind alone. No, these images were things he had seen, and done, before in countless runs within their old prison back in the Underground. The countless times that he had Reset and gone through the whole of the underground slaughtering every monster he crossed. They were not new images to him; he had seen them even when he was Flowey, he had even recounted them when he had grown bored with doing the killings himself. Now though, now that he had a soul that allowed him to feel empathy, love, and compassion for others, the faces of countless monsters haunted him. It had been nearly three months since they had escaped the underground and been welcomed with open hooves by the Equestrians, and during that time his dreams had been nice and peaceful, his past remaining just that, in the past. And given that thanks to the efforts of Frisk, he had a chance to redeem himself for the actions of said past, and perhaps even more important, being reunited with a sibling he thought he had lost forever… he’d really felt like luck was finally on his side for once. Having to suffer through some bad dreams was a small price to pay for all of that. And even though he knew his siblings would tell him otherwise, he kept the pain the nightmares were buried and out of sight. Frisk already had enough on their mind, and Chara had their own bad memories to deal with. And well, trying to tell Mom or King Dad Guy the full truth about what had happened to him… it wasn't something that he wanted to burden them with. So, it was with some surprise that this night, the nightmare was shattered. The darkness twirled and spun away, being replaced by an infinite starry expanse, and the sight of one of the two Royals of Equestria. “P-Princess Luna?” The Lunar Princess nodded her head as she strode towards the Prince of Monsters. “Yes, and we are sorry that it took us this long to reach your dreams. With your brethren having joined us on the surface there is much more work to do in the dreamscape. Nor was it an easy task reaching the depths of darkness that cloud your mind.” Asriel squirmed upon hearing that, casting his eyes down to the... well he wasn’t sure it was ground but regardless he couldn’t bring himself to meet Princess Luna’s gaze. “You didn’t need to come and help me with my dreams… I-I’m lucky I got to sleep peacefully as long as I did anyways.” Luna frowned at that, then strode forward until she was standing right in front of Asriel. She leaned her neck down until her face was even with his, then use the tip of her nose to gently nudge his face up. She could see a great deal of sadness and regret in the Prince’s eyes, and she could sense what lifetimes of newly felt guilt was hanging over him. “Little one, you are not the only one who has done terrible things in this world. You are not alone, and you do not need to bear this weight alone.” Luna murmured softly as she laid on the ground, using a wing to pull him closer. It took a moment, but she was not surprised when the young monster wrapped his arms around her neck tightly, clinging to her like a lifeline. Still, despite that small comfort, Asriel’s next words made it clear that it would not be that easy to chase away the demons haunting his rest. Asriel quivered and shook, tears quickly pouring forth as the dam holding it all began to weaken. “But you don’t understand, I don’t think anyone can understand! What I’ve experienced… What I’ve done! This isn’t like someone hurting someone’s feelings, or getting bullied all the time. I-I’ve killed so many countless times... only to reset and do it all again. I’ve hurt so many people, Yet the only one who knows this is the one person who’s never hurt anyone unless they weren’t given a choice…” Luna was silent for a moment, giving the young monster child a chance to let anything else out. She knew that the young prince had a complicated past, both from her discussions with Frisk and Chara as well as with the skeleton Sans. And she had just witnessed a few of the night terrors that had been plaguing him for the last few days… Yet the implications of just this small scrap, these few drops of pain and anguish that hinted at so much more… It was not what she had expected. But contrary to his belief, she did understand. “Tell me young prince… What do you know of Nightmare Moon?” There was a pause as Asriel seemed to be taken off guard by the question. “I, well I uh… I know that you used to be her. That Celestia beat you and sealed you in the moon for a thousand years… but that the Elements of Harmony have helped cleanse you of that darkness. Same thing everyone in Equestria knows, right?” Luna let out a laugh that sent chills down Asriel’s spine. It almost reminded him of Flowey’s laugh… except that here, there was a tinge of venom to the ice. “If only it were that simple… If it were only that simple, I might not have my own demons to haunt me. I would not have the regrets that I have, nor would I be envious of you for this ability you speak of called ‘reset’.” Asriel was about to ask what she meant by that, but she continued before he had much of a chance. “What I tell you can only be shared with your siblings and your parents, unless I or my sister Celestia say otherwise. Understand?” Another pause, one in which Luna was able to see the young monster working out this request with what she just said a moment ago. Smart, and wise beyond his years… An old soul inside someone so young… Her thoughts were interrupted as he finally said, “Y-Yes, I understand.” Luna nodded. Still, she needed to be sure… “Pinkie Pie swear?” Asriel gulped at that. Sans had accidentally broken one of those in their first week in Equestria. It was the first time that he’d ever seen the skeleton scared witless that didn’t involve the death of his loved ones… and the first time that Sans had gotten to enjoy the experience of feeling his sins crawling down his back. “Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.” Asriel said as he followed through the motions, And upon completion he received a satisfied nod from Luna. Silence filled the air for a long moment as he watched Luna compose herself for what she was about to share. Asriel had an idea of what she was going to tell him… The full story of what her time as Nightmare Moon was like. Given of what he learned and seen of the pony so far, as well as the princesses, he wasn’t exactly sure what to expect. “Thousands.” Luna said, her voice almost a whisper. Asriel Thought he might have misheard, but she soon repeated it, louder this time and with a bit of a waver in her voice. “Thousands of ponies died during my brief spat with madness. Some died at the hooves of my supporters… some I killed directly… many more died in their beds as the horrors I unleashed upon the dreamscape tore at their minds and bodies. Others still fell to the claws and teeth of the nightmarish demons I brought into the waking world.” Luna looked up into the starry void surrounding the pair, her eyes seeing something that Asriel could not. “For one, long, bloody year I left the land and the ponies of it in darkness. I took my jealousy, my anger, my hatred... And unleashed it upon thousands of innocent ponies and other creatures. It may have technically been only a single night, but time does not care if the sun or moon rises or sets. And in my madness, I relished in those deaths. I felt that they were those who’d shunned my night, who’d shunned that which I created each and every night. And that because of this, they deserved death. For they were not worthy of it.” Asriel could feel the pain in Luna’s voice, and he could feel his own soul aching and yearning to comfort her, to tell her it would be okay… But he wasn’t exactly sure if he was someone who should be doing that. But it was quite clear, that sharing this with him was not an easy thing for the Princess of the Night. And that there was more yet to be told. “When my sister and I finally met in battle, my hatred had grown strong enough that I didn’t simply want to beat her… I wanted to END her. For even in the madness there was still a part of me inside. But the darkness had twisted and tainted my soul so deeply that I had convinced myself this was all her fault. All the damage I had done laid at her hooves. That if she had just surrendered and let me take the throne for myself and keep Equestrian in an eternal night…” “That if she just let you win, everything would be fine.” Asriel chimed in, thinking back to a similar moment between him and Frisk... Luna gave Asriel a pained smile, but after a moment nodded in agreement. “After a fashion, yes... that is indeed how I felt. And of course, well you know what happened next, or at least part of it…” Asriel didn’t say anything, and said casting his gaze down to the ground once more. While being sealed inside the moon wasn’t exactly the same as being stuck inside the form of a flower, he knew what it was like to be trapped in a prison that you couldn’t escape… Literally and figuratively. “Being banished for a thousand years did give me plenty of time to think, corrupted as my mind and soul was. With little else to do but go over what had happened, I used my own dreamscape to relive every moment and think about what I did wrong.” Luna let out a dark, hollow laugh as she added, “You’d think that would’ve been enough to make me atone within my prison, but you’d be wrong. I merely realize that I got about the whole thing the wrong fashion, killing those who in time could have been loyal, loving subjects.” Shaking her head, her own gaze followed Asriel’s down into the star-studded void. The pair shared a moment of silence together, their thoughts their own, before Asriel asked, “when you broke free, was your only desire vengeance? Taking what you thought should have been yours?” “No… Even though I had a thousand years to stew in my darkness, at the end of the day what I desired most was to be loved and respected as much as my sister had been. To have ponies enjoy what I created… I wanted them to care about the night as much as I did.” Hearing that from Luna struck a chord within Asriel, and he could he feel a connection between the lunar princess and himself that hadn’t been there before. And, while it might have been odd to many others, the realization that came with that connection drew a laugh out of the Prince. Luna gave Asriel a questioning look, which just made him laugh a bit more. When he managed to compose himself, he said “Sorry, it’s just that… You were right. I’m not alone, I’m not the only one carrying a dark past with them.” A smile broke out over Luna’s muzzle, and soon, even she let out a few chuckles. She used her wing to bring Asriel close again as she remarked In a teasing tone, “Perhaps in the future you won’t doubt the Princess of the Night when she speaks the truth?” Asriel giggled and nodded, wrapping his arms around her neck and giving her an appreciative nuzzle. The bright smile on his face soon grew somber however, as he asked “How do you deal with it? How do you learn to live with such guilt?” “A wise King once told me that the way to face such a past is to give each day your best, and to try not to dwell on it. To accept that it happened, that it’s in your past, and that you’re going to work hard each and every day to make up for your mistakes. You can’t do anything about your past, but you can decide what future you will have.” Luna replied, smirking a little as she looked down to Asriel and asked, “And do you know who told me that young Prince?” Asriel thought about it for a moment, before asking “Was it my dad?” Chuckling, Luna leaned down to boop Asriel on the nose as she admitted, “Yes as a matter of fact it was… Though actually he was saying it to both Celestia and myself. But he did leave out something very important.” “Oh? And what was that?” Asriel asked with the tilt of his head. An almost motherly look crossed Luna’s muzzle as she leaned down and gave Asriel a peck on the forehead and pressed him close to her side. “That when you have friends, you don’t have to carry the weight alone. Your friends are there to help and support you, so don’t leave them out. Let them into your heart so that they can know you fully, and love you all the more. True friends are there for you through the good and the bad, thick and thin.” She then reached up with a hoof and ruffled his head as she added, “Especially when those friends are all powerful princesses.” After that, Luna and Asriel shared a laugh and a few more hugs Before Luna stood and said, “The day is almost upon us young Prince. I trust you’ll keep what we’ve talked about in mind when it comes to the darkness that weighs upon your heart? As well as the Pinkie promise that you made?” Asriel nodded his head vigorously, both because of the Pinkie Promise and worry about the kinds of pranks a several thousand year old Alicorn could think of. As he did so, Luna smiled and her horn began to glow a dark blue, Asriel start to notice a tingling sensation wash over his head that left him feeling rather relaxed. “I will Luna, and I’ll do my best to live with my past, and always strive to do better each and every day.” Luna spread her wings and inclined her head as she said, “That is all that we can do young Prince. Make the best out of each day and keep our friends close. Now, I must continue my work before the sun rises. There are still a few more of our subjects plagued by nightmares that I must tend to. Know that the rest of your sleep shall be a more peaceful one.” With that, Luna flew up and soared into the starry void that made up the dreamscape until she vanished in a flash of light. With her gone, the twinkling lights of the starry void began to fade away until Asriel was left in nothing but darkness. And just as Luna promised, nothing came to torment him as he closed his eyes and began to drift off. Asriel’s last thoughts before he slipped into a peaceful slumber was that perhaps tomorrow night he should pay Luna’s night court a visit, and see if he could repay the favor...