//------------------------------// // 99 Audacity, Part Three // Story: Continuity Disrupted // by Doug Graves //------------------------------// Twilight calmly walks up to the table, inspecting the polished metal. She runs a hoof along the surface. Solid construction. Bolts could probably hold an earth pony. She might be able to pry them apart, if her horn wasn’t restrained properly. The rest of the room is covered in a mishmash of metal and wood cabinets and shelves, upon which the blinking machines rest. “Uh oh,” Pinkie Pie utters from behind Twilight. The unicorn spins around while taking a step back, her horn lowering to face the pink mare. Pinkie Pie is violently shuddering, her tail rapidly vibrating back and forth. “Twitchy tail! Twitchy tail!” “E-excuse me?” Twilight says, her guard lowering as her curiosity piques. Her head cocks to the side as she stares at Pinkie Pie. “What’s ‘twitchy tail’?” Pinkie Pie manages to hold a hoof steady to point at her tail, but this merely makes the rest of her body quake even more. “It’s when my tail’s a-twitchin’! See? Twitcha-twitcha-twitch a twitch!” Twilight raises an eyebrow. “Yes, I can see that. But, what does it mean?” Pinkie Pie whips out a metal pot from behind her - it could have been resting on one of the shelves, but Twilight is fairly certain those were completely bare before - and slams it down, completely covering her head like a helmet. Pinkie Pie peeks out from beneath, a hurried, “The twitchin’ means my Pinkie Sense is telling me that stuff is about to start falling!” She flicks with her hoof a few times, “You two better duck for cover.” “For what?” Twilight asks, looking up at the ceiling. Still mostly tree roots and dirt. “A rock is going to fall on me?” Spike darts backwards regardless of Twilight’s skepticism, his eyes staring at the ceiling and waiting for something to fall. Twilight glances over, snorting and shaking her head before she goes back to studying the ceiling. Spike, in his haste to get to cover, bumps into the shelf with the surgical tools as he dives for the nearest table. The box above rocks back and forth, teetering on the edge. Spike peeks out from underneath, his eyes widening as the box tips over, releasing an array of knives and scalpels and other vicious implements. “Aaah!” Spike yells as he pulls his head back, barely yanking his tail away as the blades bury themselves into the ground inches away from him. “Spike! Are you okay?” Twilight shouts, rushing over to the cowering dragon. Her horn lights, pulling the tools out and replacing them in the box. She whirls around, stamping a hoof and glaring at Pinkie Pie. “He could have been seriously injured!” “Well, yeah,” Pinkie Pie says, rapping a hoof against her helmet. The pot reverberates, messing with Pinkie Pie’s voice as she continues, “Tha-hat’s-t’s wh-hy I-I to-ol-ld hi-im ab-bou-out it!” “That’s just a coincidence!” Twilight grits her teeth, motioning to the box. “That’s just a giant hazard waiting to happen! You should tie things around here more securely so that doesn’t happen!” “Oooh, like this?” Pinkie Pie holds onto the operating table, though she immediately starts vibrating again, though this time in different, more specific areas. “Ear flop! Eye flutter! Knee twitch!” “Wait, more than one?” Spike asks in a shaky voice, still hiding underneath one of the tables. “What’s that mean?” “I call ‘em ‘combo’s.”  Pinkie Pie grins as she lays down on the table, opening the clamps and slipping her hooves inside. Spike hesitantly asks, slowly slipping out from under the table. “C-combos? W-what’s that one mean?” “That one means watch out for opening doors!” Pinkie Pie uses her mouth to close the clamps, then motioning with her mane to one of the cabinet doors lining the wall. “On a completely unrelated note, Twilight, can you get the straps? I think they’re over there.” “No problem,” Twilight says, rolling her eyes. “I still don’t believe all this ‘special powers’ nonsense.” She walks over to the cabinet doors, trying to decide which one Pinkie Pie meant. She tentatively reaches a hoof forwards. “NO! Not that one!” Pinkie Pie yells, tugging against her restraints to no avail. “Oh!” Twilight says, pulling her hoof back. “Thanks!” She opens the other door, a mess of silk and leather straps tumbling out. “Wait, nothing bad happened! That means your prediction was wrong!” Pinkie Pie shakes her head, “No, that just means it hasn’t happened yet.” Her ear flops again, then eyes flutter, then knee twitches. “See?” Twilight rolls her eyes, “Right.” She levitates a couple over, glancing between Pinkie Pie and the bolted rings. “Where do you want these?” “Hind legs at the hoof, base of the tail, as far down the tail as you can manage, around the barrel, and you should probably do one around the neck for good measure.” Pinkie Pie points out each spot with her mane, ending up looking Twilight in the eye. “This your first time?” “Yeah,” Twilight says absentmindedly, her gaze returning to the unopened cabinet doors while her horn lights, tying Pinkie Pie as requested. “What’s in the other one?” Pinkie Pie shrugs. “Mystery. You don’t want to know.” “That’s… quite possibly the worst thing you could have told me,” Twilight says with a huff. “It can’t be that bad.” Pinkie Pie shrugs again. “Yeah. You’re probably right.” Twilight walks back over to the cabinet. She steels herself, her horn lighting and a raspberry shield appearing between her and the door. She reaches a hoof around the shield, tugging the door open. She gasps as she spots an oddly shaped helmet, studded with unlit lights and two wires coming off the top like antenna. Her shield drops as she reaches forward, “Well, well, well, what’s in here?” Pinkie Pie considers for a moment. “Let’s see. Two of these are true, and one is false. It’s a helmet that tells you exactly how my Pinkie Sense works, but only if my Pinkie sense triggers while I’m wearing it. I made it by soldering random blinking lights onto an old mixing bowl. And it’s completely worthless because it will never work.” Pinkie Pie grins. Twilight mumbles to herself, “Well, if the first one is false, then I shouldn’t bother using it. But if the second is false, then it shouldn’t work, because it’s just an old mixing bowl. And if the third is false, then I should definitely use it. Hmm.” She considers for a second before she smiles, reaching deep into the cabinet to grab the helmet. Along with the helmet comes a giant cloud of dust, tickling Twilight's nostrils like nothing else. She sneezes, ramming her head into the metal above. A second sneeze flings her outside the cabinet, still holding onto the helmet. "You okay?" Spike asks as Twilight picks herself up, rubbing her head. "M'fine," Twilight mutters, glaring at the door as it swings closed. Pinkie Pie gently struggles against her bonds, “Now, I’m pretty sure you were about to ask me some questions. But I’d like to see you make me talk!” She grins, growling softly and narrowing her eyes at Twilight. Then her ears flop, knee twitches, and eyes flutter. “Pinkie, I’d have to torture you to get you to stop talking.” Twilight says with a shake of the head. She narrows her eyes at the ear flop. “Wait, do I need to look out for another door opening?” “Nope! That was an ear flop, knee twitch, eye flutter. You’re thinking of an ear flop, eye flutter, knee twitch!” Twilight deadpans, “Of course I was,” as she fiddles with the helmet, eventually securing the helmet on Pinkie Pie with a chin strap. “Ear flop, knee twitch, eye flutter means the sky is about to be graced by a beautiful rainbow! Or, at least, the air inside here.” Pinkie Pie’s eyes sparkle with delight as she looks around, entranced by the mere prospect of a beautiful rainbow. Rainbow Dash opens the door at the top of the stairs. She takes one oblivious step downstairs before coming to a dead stop. She stares at Pinkie Pie, Twilight, and Spike, the three not noticing her just yet. Her hoof reverses direction, silently backing up the stairs, softly closing the door behind her. “Huh.” Pinkie Pie glances towards the empty stairwell. “I could have sworn that something was going to happen.” “See? What did I say! I knew this special power stuff was a bunch of nonsense!” Twilight Sparkle taps her hoof against the helmet. The helmet activates, brilliant light pouring from every blinking light. It paints the room a beautiful rainbow of colors, each scintillating as Twilight turns, gaping at the display. “Eee!” Pinkie Pie happily shrieks, quivering in joy at the chromatic display. “See! I knew it!” Twilight gasps, the barest hint of Laughter tickling the back of her throat. She slowly leans forward. It isn’t nearly as intense the first time Pinkie Pie released her burst of laughter, the effect dying nearly as quickly as it began. Nowhere near as intense, which makes it easier to resist but also less fulfilling. “You okay, Twilight?” Spike asks, coming up behind her. Twilight huffs. “I’m fine. This just gets more ridiculous by the minute!” She picks the helmet up, slamming it down on Pinkie Pie’s head. “There! Now, talk!” “Okay!” Pinkie Pie looks down at her restraints. “What did you want to talk about? Cake? Baking? Random emanations of Laughter magic that barely slake your lust for power?” “What was that last one?” says Spike. “No!” Twilight shouts. “Make some predictions!” “Okay!” Pinkie Pie sits there, staring at Twilight. “I’m waiting,” Twilight says, the tapping of her hoof against the ground getting faster and faster. “Sorry, Twilight. I don’t control it. They just come and go!” Pinkie Pie pulls her hooves out of the restraints to better shrug. “Ugh…” Twilight moans, covering her face with a hoof. “Fine. We can table this one for now, and talk about that other one. Wait, how did you know I’ve been absorbing Laughter magic?” “I… didn’t?” Pinkie Pie says with a small grin and shrug. Twilight closes her eyes. Pinkie Pie guesses, “So, you need my help to get to the bottom of this mystery, which involves all of our friends, and it potentially involves a highly dangerous branch of magic? And you’re worried about what might happen if things go wrong, or possibly right, or what will happen once you’ve gotten a taste of each of us?” Twilight opens her mouth, then closes it. She looks at Pinkie. “Yes. Although, I didn’t feel nearly as strong a pull from you today, compared to yesterday. I’m hoping that the craving fades on magic I’ve already taken.” “Well, why didn’t you say so earlier?” Pinkie Pie grins, slipping out of all the restraints. “Which one of our herdmates do you need first? Trixie?” Twilight shakes her head, “No, I don’t need her. I think it's specific to the Elements of Harmony.” “Really? Who’d you absorb Friendship from, then? Or do you think that because you’re a Friendship specialist yourself you don’t need to? Hmm.” Pinkie Pie taps her hoof against her chin. “I may have gotten Friendship from Rarity. I’m not sure.” Twilight sighs. “I still have a little recollection of what she was doing, back when we were experimenting.” She glances back at her flank, only the four smaller white stars lightly shining, not the larger pink one. Pinkie Pie nods along. “Well, we might as well start on something we don’t already know. Be right back!” Twilight opens her mouth to object, but Pinkie Pie disappears in a burst of dust that leaves her coughing, the helmet clattering to the ground. Spike moves over, picking the helmet up and wiping it clean. “Down here? But, it’s unfinished! There’s dirt everywhere, and it will ruin my mane!” Rarity appears at the top of the stairs, looking down at Twilight and Spike. Pinkie Pie is behind her, looking ready to shove her down the stairs, or at least keep her from retreating. “Oh.” She glances back to Pinkie Pie before taking a hesitant step down. “I-is there something you need?” “Yes,” Twilight says resolutely, standing next to the metal operating table still covered with straps. “I want you to try channeling Friendship again. Or Generosity, whichever you feel is easier.” “A-are you sure?” Rarity says worriedly, reaching the bottom of the steps. “Because, well, after the last time…” “I’m sure.” Twilight smiles at Rarity. “Everything is going to be just fine.”