Its been nearly three years since I showed up in Equestria, in Ponyville to be precise. T’was some time after Discord was awoken for the first time. The only reason I can be sure of that is that the first thing I saw when I woke up was the insane chaos god a few inches from my face. It turned out that he wanted to use me to cause some chaos and destruction, now had it been a few years earlier in my life I would have gladly joined in on the chaos, but I had opened a cafe on earth and calmed down on the destruction so I told him nah, he was a little shocked obviously. He tried to discord me but the magic didn’t have any effect on me, the same thing happened when He tried to send me home for being boring, so he left me to my own devices. Some time after that I asked Twilight and she did some tests and concluded I was magically absorbent and inert. In non Twilight, after being brought here I became a walking magic sponge that isn’t affected by and can’t use magic, so when it’s directed at me it’s soaked up and slowly dispersed into the environment around me.
After that Twilight brought me to The Princesses, I explained what I was and where I was from, how I already know who all of them were and that I may know some of their future, so that if I do anything outrageous it would probably for a good reason. Following that I went back to ponyville with twilight, was introduced to and made friends with the main six and got a job with the cakes as a slightly more permanent worker than pinkie pie. I keep in contact with Luna, and Celestia whom I will never refer to by her actual name when talking to or about her. Every other day off I’d go up to Canterlot to visit them. But enough about the past, you must be dying to know about me.
Simply put I’m a twenty five year old man by the name of Vincent, currently living about two streets away from Golden Oaks, I’m tall chubby man at just under two mares tall, or six foot five inches tall. I’m quite the cook and baker from a few years of owning a cafe. I have watched most of My Little Pony, which is why I know almost everyone of the ponies I’ve met. Luna and Pinkie are my favorite ponies. Discord dragged me into this world three years ago, since then I’ve made a few friends, a few enemies and a lot of desserts.
Going by the show I’ve currently just lived past Inspiration Manifestation, Rarity was pretty creepy. I went to the royal wedding, it was... Something, although I did threaten to turn Queen Chrysalis into a goopy green stain on the wall if she actually hurt my friends, so that was fun if a bit violent. After that I didnt really join in the bug fighting, except to save some colts and fillies.
Well I think it’s about time to wrap up with the past and introduction, the main story will begin, next time *insert to be continued meme here*