//------------------------------// // Ch.26: Where it's Warm // Story: Tapestry: A World Apart // by Star Scraper //------------------------------// Their travel pattern had been inexplicable. They had cantered for awhile, then suddenly Snowglade had used some magic – Rarity could feel it – and she'd been hushed and made to lay on the ice with Gratitude for some painfully long time while the rest of the team went off somewhere by themselves. “Whenever I give you a little tap, give one back so I know you're not unconscious,” Gratitude had whispered. They'd laid on the ice for so long she understood why she'd been given that order. As time wore on, she started to get cold despite the many thick layers. On a few occasions the tap startled her and she'd realized she'd almost fallen asleep. Finally the rest of the team returned, and it felt like endless hours as they laid in silence for no discernible reason. But given the last time an aircraft passed, how if she'd talked she would've gotten them all killed by the pegasi that followed after, she knew better than to question their methods. But slowly, the cold grew sharper, and reached deeper, and her eyelids and body felt like lead. She had started to shiver, fighting to keep from shivering too loudly, before she finally heard the familiar, terrible roaring. Another aircraft appeared in the distance, sweeping a bright light over rail lines on the ice. She heard a small click from the sergeant, and a stopwatch start ticking. “Go, go, go! Sixty seconds!” the sergeant bellowed, leading Snowglade and Clockwork away in a sprint. She was again left alone with the medic, who insisted she remain quiet. Far ahead, the two stallions and young mare found the railway in the dark void, and set their present on it, then galloped back. Twilight felt like she'd only just arrived in this terrible, strange world. Almost immediately, the whole nightmarish ordeal had melted from her mind – or at least, she refused to remember why she was washing herself in a dry bathtub, had chafe marks around her belly, ankles and wrists, or how she'd gotten on this train she could hear endlessly clanking over its tracks, to this tiny bathroom where she had to use warm rags to wash herself. Her entire body was painfully sore and stiff. But as she dipped a soft cloth in a bowl of warm water and splashed herself with it, she remembered this much – That's not Rainbow, but she has some seed of Rainbow within her, and I know Rainbow is loyal, above all else. They're just characters in this book we're all in, but she has to have some semblence of Rainbow within her – why else would the book have chosen one of my best friends to play her role? A thought poked out at her, what even is her name? Who is she that she's in this luxury car, knows all those other ponies, yet she's also the one who – who talked to me when I was... - and she has, what was he – some guard? She paused. She felt her entire body tense. She could remember the knife again. The helplessness to move. The bonds strapping her in the tiny coffin. Shivering in terror as she felt the knife caress her body, helplessly unable to move away from it. She jumped up and flared her wings up, “Yargh, NO!” she kicked wildly with a hoof, knocking the bowl of water over, her eyes suddenly wide as she stood on the edge of the bathtub. Her forehead hit her with a pang of pain, and she sat back down in the tub, panting. “What's going on in here!?” Dash popped in, looking half as panicked as she did. Twilight whipped her head back to look at her. Rainbow still shivered with cold – but Twilight shook. She tried to speak, but her tongue caught itself. “I – I...” “Are – what's... what's wrong?” the pegasus finally asked, her tone becoming a bit more sympathetic, the sharpness of her terrified look softening. “I just...” Twilight's voice broke. I – I – what was I doing? What is she doing? Why is she doing this to me? “What happened?” she repeated the question again, taking a tentative step forward. “I – I just...” the de-horned alicorn bowed her head. She still felt throbs of pain under her bandaged forehead. Her voice fell to a barely audible mumble. “I just wish I could forget. I – I just remembered and it startled me...” “Remembered what?” the governor asked, taking another step forward, eager curiosity strong in her voice. It felt oddly easy to be open to a pony who didn't exist – who was nothing more than a character in a story. It was like talking to her reflection. “...what your friend did to me,” she whispered. There was a long, uncomfortable silence filled only with the endless clanking of the train's wheels over rails. “I -...” Now the governor was at a loss for words. Twilight looked back up at her. The governor moved her mouth as if to speak – then caught herself, saying nothing for another few seconds, before finally speaking again in a deeply sorrowful tone, “I'll... I'll dry you off from the belly forward if you'll get the rest. After all I've put you through, I should be your servant...” she walked into the bathroom and took two dry towels out of a little shelf, then sat at the edge of the tub. “Turn around, I'll start with your back.” Twilight still stared at her, her eyes still wide – afraid for a moment to turn her back on her, before she thought, if she wanted me dead, she could easily do it right now. I'm not good with my hooves. I feel so shaky and sore it's hard to sit upright, even. She inwardly sighed. She spared my life already, and she's unarmed. She's not going to kill me now, and if I refuse, she could easily overpower me and kill me. She even said so earlier. If I refuse this and she actually wants me dead, she'd go and get that pistol and shoot me, anyways. She just looked at the dry towel she found in her hooves, then closed her eyes, and let out a long breath, and turned around, almost expecting to find hooves on her neck. Instead, she felt the dry towel rub on her back and around her wings. The sensation of having another pony dry her was vaguely familiar. The memories came back to her quickly. If she closed her eyes, she could imagine it was her mom drying her off after a bath. I – I need to get a handle on this! We're together now, that's all that matters. Whatever I just came out of – it's behind us. We just have to make sure it stays behind us. I need to figure out what this situation is – why she thinks she's going to die, and come up with a solution. I didn't have my magic in Discord's maze, either, and we still pulled through. And this time, Dash is already on my side, so... I just need to figure out what's going on. She mentally caught herself No – not “Dash” - some character who's like Rainbow Dash. This isn't Rainbow Dash, though, she's a fictional character! I can't forget that, no matter how real this book seems! It's all just fictional. Whatever it felt like that pony did to me – it's just – it's just like a bad nightmare I can wake up from. Like reading some horror book. I'll just close it at some point and it'll be over. I just need to get out of it, and be sure to take my friends with me back to Equestria – the real world. No matter how real this all looks, feels, sounds... It's just like the whole 'Power Ponies' comic book world. This would never happen in the real world. Such a terrible society could never exist. She again comforted herself. She opened her mouth to ask why she'd been imprisoned and abused – then caught her tongue, again steeling herself. I know. They believe unicorns brought an endless winter. Astilbe explained this. It's not a satisfactory answer to me, and I know it's factually wrong, but they believe it and there's more important things than trying to change her mind about that when she's already on my side. It is what it is. First things, first. I didn't mope about why Discord had taken my horn or The Elements, or why Chrysalis sent me to those caves, captured me and my friends, or why Sombra put me in that trap – we just found a way, and that's what I'll do here, now. Rainbow's on my side, so I need to figure out how to save her – like she asked me to. Maybe I'm not good with my hooves, but I am good with my head. “So...” she finally broke the silence, “what's going on?” she asked, finally returning to her normal senses and drying herself off from the waist down. “I don't think I ever told you my name. I'm Full Spectrum, occupational governor of the Delphi dome,” she explained, her voice again calm. Her drying paused for a moment, then resumed as she asked, “when... when I first spoke to you, how did you know I had a Rainbow mane and tail? How did you describe me just from my voice? Didn't you say something about another world?” She started gingerly drying the unicorn's head, being careful around the bandage over where her horn had been sawed off. The questions struck her just as another pang of pain from her forehead did. She could feel the clamps on her hooves again for a brief moment, before glancing down to assure herself they were long gone. Without my magic, I'm just as stuck here as I was in that prison – I'm not free yet! What if it's not over!? – her eyes slowly went wide again. What if she's just moved me here to get more answers out of me? “Y-Yeah,” Twilight nodded, and kept herself from saying any more. But I don't want to let her know I'm onto her yet, either. She shivered. If she's just doing this to make me talk, then if she finds out I'm onto her, she'll just send me back... I don't want to go back. I won't go back. I'll find a way from here... And I'll have to do it quick. “So... you came here... just to save your friend, was it?” Spectrum slowly fought through her words, and ignored her unanswered questions. Twilight hesitated. There's no way she doesn't know what I've already told her. She's gotta be testing me... “...I just want to find my friends and go home. Well... whoever of them is left...” her ears drooped. She wasn't a good actress, but there was no need to act when the feelings were real. The governor finished drying her off and spoke as she went back to a tiny vanity, getting a brush out of a drawer and returning, “I honestly don't know if that other unicorn you were trying to rescue is dead or not. The one you found on the stage wasn't her. It was some other pony we used an enchanted item on to make her look like the unicorn.” Twilight's ears perked back up. That would explain how she knows about enchanted items! “You mean Rarity – the white unicorn escaped!?” “Well...” came a hesitant response, “escaped, yes. But she's certainly dead. We didn't even bother searching the downwind. It's like watching a pony run into a burning building and not run back out. It's pretty easy to tell what happened to her...” Before Twilight could even think, she snapped, “Then why did you have some poor lookalike pony executed!?” she cried, stomping a hoof on the edge of the tub. The governor didn't meet her eyes. “To appease the ponies of the dome. Ponies die all the time. That one died for something greater than herself, though – she died to bring peace to the minds of all the ponies I ruled. She accomplished more with her life than most ponies ever do...” “How can you say that!?” She stood up and felt her wings flaring. “You can't just – you can't just kill ponies like that!” The Governor's wings edged out, but she kept them from unfolding completely. “She was a criminal, Twilight. A penal slave for life. She had a miserable existence – we were doing her a favor and saving the entire dome in the process.” She folded her wings back against her sides. She sighed and shook her head, averting her eyes as her ears lowered and her tone dropped. “And that's far from the worst thing I've ever done...” She looked Twilight straight in the eyes, her ears perking back up, strength returning to her voice, “As a governor I had a proud and solemn duty. A duty to the ponies I ruled over – a sacred duty to The Order of the Hatten Vanguard, and to the survival of ponykind against this Eternal Unicorns' Winter. I never once betrayed a single pony under my wings – if they died, they died in service to ponykind so the rest of us could live. That's the world we live in...” her confidence broke near the end, and her gaze turned from Twilight's eyes to her wings. “At least, that's what I used to believe. I always wondered if it was really necessary, some part of me, I guess... But now that you're here – an alicorn... that changes everything.” She paused for a moment, then turned around and left the bathroom. “Let me grab you something to wear real quick...” I would've expected her to be more dogmatic than that. If somepony is truly set on something, they'll dismiss any contrary evidence... The alicorn looked back at her own wings, as well. She shivered as her mind imagined what that sawing knife would've felt like on her wings instead of her horn. She looked back at the doorway Rainbow had left through. Clearly she's not being genuine. Is she trying to trick my sympathy out of me. You'll get none! She felt her teeth grit in her mouth. The governor returned with some clothes in a hoof. “Here,” she gave them to her guest, who stepped out of her tub and started getting dressed immediately. She turned away so Twilight was only in her peripherals. If they consider being naked so taboo, it's about time they gave me something to wear, the thought quickly passed through her head. “So what's going on? Why do you think you're going to die? Why are we on a train?” she asked as she struggled with the clothes. Even if she lies, she might accidentally let something useful slip. It's better than nothing. The Governor paused for a moment before giving an answer. Her voice was once again defeated and weak. She was staring at a flag on a wall in her quarters. “Well... truth be told, I've never really enjoyed the sacrifices I've had to make. The things I've done, seen... felt. All ponies have the potential to become monsters. Especially the heroes nobody believes could possibly be one. I felt myself becoming a monster, and I fought it, and the war has destroyed me. I know others are planning to take advantage of my weakness. Right now there's even a plot against me. And I've done nothing about it, because I'm scared if I have any more ponies killed, I'll...” At this point Twilight was fully dressed in a matching nightgown. “Become a monster?” she finished for her captor. The governor nodded, now looking at her former prisoner again. “And you, being an alicorn – that changes everything. If alicorns actually exist, then our very founding beliefs are wrong. The Order of the Hatten Vanguard is just as much lies as we believed The Ceruleans to be. I knew there were many lies and games in positions of power, but I never imagined... and...” her voice grew strained. Spectrum gritted her teeth, her wings flaring as tears came to her eyes and she stood up, “I don't know what I want to believe! Either I did it all for nothing – nothing at all, just pointless deaths that saved nopony – deaths that not only saved nopony but are the very REASON for the winter!” she finished shouting with a stomp of her hoof, her broken voice returning to finish, “...or the world is such a cruel and terrible place that they were all necessary. That this is our state forever, that this world – that this world is just damned. If this is what it takes for the world to continue, then is it really worth saving?” She cursed with another punch of her hoof on the velvet carpeted floor “Damnit – I-I just wish I could've lived in a world that wasn't like this – where – where I didn't have to choose! But at least – at least you're proof – right, you're proof?” She sharply turned to look at Twilight again, “- proof that there is hope for this world, if... if only The Order falls.” Twilight was began tentatively, but built strength as she spoke, “There – I... Of course there's hope for the world. No matter what there's always hope – even for this world!” She barely understood what she was saying, but the words came out on their own. “I know we can save this world! We've done it before – when my own world was in trouble, it's always come through!” The governor just looked at her, wide-eyed as though she'd said something incomprehensible and earth-shattering. She shook her head, “N-no I just...” she choked on her words. “But don't you understand? If there's hope then it's me – I'm the reason that – I just can't -” she put her forehooves on her head, cowering to the ground, “- they're in my head! And I deserve it! Every bit! I should be on the end of those ropes, not them! Not him! Not her! I'm not on your side, Twilight! I'm not!” She looked up at the alicorn from her bowing position, as if she were some grand judge. Her eyes were wet, but she wasn't pleading for mercy. “I never asked for this! My whole life I've been raised to be governor, I thought the Delphi invasion would be the greatest thing to happen in my life! I thought it was the best life I could ever have – and I didn't listen when my father warned me – I should've listened!” She bowed her head back into the red carpet, “It's like my whole life I've been dreaming and only recently I've woken up to a nightmare! Nothing will end The Winter! The Vanguard is full of selfish and evil ponies even worse than me who'd just as soon kill you for fun as look at you – but I'd rather die me than become that! It's selfish, I'm selfish to care so much just about myself! To be unable to be strong and kill however many it takes to survive!” “Spectrum – just... calm down a little...” Twilight gently plead, putting a hoof on her shoulder. “No!” She shrugged the hoof off, standing, but her eyes were unable to meet the alicorn's again. “I – I get it now! I get it now! I can't be governor, I'm not fit to be governor! I made my choice – I couldn't kill you, I couldn't keep being who I was always meant to be!” The wildness dissipated from her voice. She went quiet, and the ferocity was replaced with determination. “I – I can't help you anymore, I'm sorry. When Nightgale comes by, tell him 'The winter wind reaps what it sowed', and he'll believe you when you tell him I ordered your protection above all else. Maybe I can at least do something right... Something I can feel good about...” She started stepping away, towards the storage car she'd rescued Twilight from. “Remember, the winter wind reaps what it sowed...” “Wait! - where are you going!?” The alicorn darted forward to put a hoof on one of the pony's cyan shoulders. She wasn't sure whether it was because she was afraid she'd send guards, or something else entirely, but she felt a terrifying undercurrent lurking underneath the pegasus pony's words. She just stopped. Her voice shook, but pushed through cries and fear with certainty. “I have to die as they did, Twilight... As long as I live, Nightgale and Goldfeather are in danger. Those are the only ponies I care about. I can never undo what I've done, but I don't have to live with it anymore.” She pushed to keep walking towards the exit from the luxury car, but Twilight's hoof held her back. “What – what do you mean by that!?” she asked. She didn't turn around to reply. “I'm going to kill myself, alicorn. Isn't that clear? Icewind will kill me anyways, only this way, maybe she won't go after Goldfeather and Nightgale.” She kept walking. Twilight didn't hold her back this time. She left the car. The Princess of Friendship's heart raced. I... She's just a character, right? But I could feel her with my hoof! Just like in Spike's comic book. But I... She felt her wings flaring in agitation. Why – why do I feel this way about some stupid character! I don't even know what's going on, maybe it's a good idea for her to - Or maybe she's just walking out to send in guards after me! Knock it off, you know that isn't what's going on – she wasn't just – just making all this up - Was she!? Well what – what is she doing in there!? Didn't she leave the little gun in there? I'm going to kill myself. I'm going to kill myself, is what she said. She saw it, in her mind's eye – Rainbow Dash, a spray of red blood. Rarity, lying motionless on the floor of her boutique in a puddle the same shade of red. Her body limp in her hooves, a gush of red blood on her head. Her body lying still, outside in the snow. Because she told her about a book. Because she didn't act fast enough. She felt herself move with passion and energy she hadn't felt in years. The doors blew open before her, her forehead seared in agony like a hot iron was pressed against it – but she didn't so much as wince or even notice as she flew. Wild, terrified magenta eyes on a cyan pegasus in a nightrobe met hers. The pegasus was crashing under her body as she pinned the terrified pony to the cold metal floor of the traincar, surrounded by metal crates and barrels. Words erupted from her mouth with a desperate life of their own, “I – I know I don't really know what's going on but we've got to keep fighting, okay!? You want to help somepony out – help me! I need you! Because I don't know what's going on and-and” - her voice choked up as tears suddenly streamed from her eyes, “and-you're right – I am helpless! I couldn't even save my own life, or anypony else's – three of my best friends now are probably dead, because of me! Because I was stupid and let them know about a fucking book I should've never told them about! But I did, because I-I'm stupid and I'm weak and I can't even get a diaper off my waist with these hooves that I have to use now because I don't have magic! I'm as stupid and helpless as a foal, here, because your policeponies took my horn off! You want to help make up for mutilating me!? For sawing off what gave me joy and identity and purpose in life since I was a foal!? Then stay here and help me out because I NEED YOU!” She was panting. The governor was wide-eyed. Any determination left in her was left in shreds. “But I-” The words spilled out again, “Yeah, you bucked up and ponies died! You're in a book, Rainbow Dash! – none of this matters, it's not real, but I am, and I matter! And my friends matter, too! And you're going to help me save as many of them as possible! I hope to Celestia when they die they just pop out of this book but I'm not ready to lay back and depend on that! So we're going to do anything and everything it takes to find them and save them, okay!? Because when you had your henchponies take my horn off – now you're responsible for what I can't do because I don't have it! You've helped me free, okay – but now it's time to do the rest and save my friends – starting with you, Rainbow!” The words poured out faster than she could think. “I know you think you're some governor, but you're not! I know who you are better than you do! That world you wished for exists, and if you help me, I'll take you back to it, because -” She put her hooves around her friend, a fresh wave of tears coming out of her as she shook with sobs, “because you're not a governor, you're not somepony meant to kill mares and stallions, you know why it feels wrong – because it is, because this isn't you, but I know the real you, and the real you is a lovable, selfish athlete who's so loyal she'd sell her own soul to Tartarus to protect her friends and you can't do that if you're dead and you can't live to see who you really are, either – so I need you to be strong for me like you always are, just a little longer...” her wild tirade had finally, gradually mellowed down, until she was left with a gentle, pleading beg. “Please? For me? For your friends you don't even know about?” Neither set of eyes were dry. “Wha-I... You want me... to help save your friends? We're in a book?” she asked, her voice full of disbelief. Twilight nodded, “Yes – and if you come with me – if you help save my friends, by letting us get out of here, I'll show you. I'll prove it to you, if you give me a chance. It can't be worse than whatever you were going to do.” “You...” she started again. “I'm from another world. That's what I meant. And I'll take you there if you can even just tell me enough to save my friends,” she simply stated. The pegasus stared up at her from the floor for a long minute, before she started sobbing – no, Twilight realized, she was chuckling. Then laughing. The soul-crushed Rainbow Dash who had just been about to kill herself was laughing. She finally spoke, tears still in her eyes, “Okay... You're right. We're all crazy. The world is crazy. What even matters anymore? I give up. So I'll do it. I don't know what you want me to do but I'll do it.” Twilight looked closely, thinking of what the Rainbow lookalike had said. There was hysteria, but sincerity in her magenta eyes. After a few seconds of hesitation, she stepped off of her, and offered a hoof to help her back up onto her own hooves. As she stood up, she turned to her rescuer, “But, Twilight, we're not going to kill anypony, okay? I've – I've had enough of that. I – I enjoy it too much...” She bowed her head, her ears flopping back. “I know. Know the monster you -” “No. You're wrong. You're not a monster, Rainbow.” The alicorn's gaze was intense and commanding, as though she could will this pony even further into submission. “And I'll show you that. I'll show you that all of this is just some nightmare, and how to wake up from it. But we can't do that if either of us are dead, so tell me who this Icewind pony is who you think is going to kill you.” “Okay,” she simply answered with a nod, and started walking back into the luxury car. “We can talk where it's warm. I'll provide more detail. Maybe you'll see a way out of this, you mad alicorn.”