//------------------------------// // Assume Nothing // Story: Over Land and Sea // by Wessexbrony //------------------------------// “There are no easy cup ties” - source unknown Saturday 6th January After a tumultuous December, it was almost a relief for January to arrive and with it, the final part of the treble agreement to start in the form of the FA Cup - the oldest cup competition in football, dating back 135 years. However, the FA Cup had a history of “giant killings”, where a team from the lower divisions could knock out a side such as Manchester United. Indeed, Manchester United had been held to 0-0 draws by lower league opposition in the past two seasons; Burton Albion last year, and Exeter City the year before that. Chelsea’s campaign to lift the FA Cup, which they had not won since 2000, the last time the final had been played at the old Wembley Stadium before it was rebuilt, would begin in the 5:30 kick off at Vicarage Road, against a Watford side who sat bottom of the Premier League. In the cup, however, that meant nothing. “One of the biggest days in the football calendar, it’s FA Cup Third Round Day,” Kick Off announced, “And it’s an all-Premier League tie this evening between Watford and Chelsea here at Vicarage Road…” “I reckon we’ve got this,” Rainbow Dash said in the Traveller’s Rest. “...and of course, the return to Chelsea of Eidur Gudjohnsen after the controversial departure of Fontana; the Icelandic striker leads the line with Kalou for Chelsea today.” “Incidentally, we played here in the third round three years ago,” I said, as the two of us sat down in the away end. “We drew 2-2 and won the replay 4-0.” That day, Watford had scored after five minutes, but it was Chelsea who attacked first in the seventh minute. A pass from Lampard found Kalou, who got into the area before seeing his shot cannon back off the post. Midway through the first half, Mikel played in Wright-Phillips, who played in Gudjohnsen. Gudjohnsen had a shot, which was saved by Foster. Watford’s first real attack came six minutes later, as Chambers’ cross was headed out by Ashley Cole. Mahon got to it, but sent his shot wide. Just after the half hour, Kovac passed to Mikel, who played in Robben. Robben found Gudjohnsen, who looked for Kalou. Kaou played in Wright-Phillips, whose shot went in despite Foster getting a hand to the ball. In the 37th minute, Smith took the ball down the right and crossed it into the area. Henderson trapped the ball, only to send his shot over. Four minutes from half time, Wright-Phillips sent a cross in from the right to Robben. Robben saw his shot strike the post, but he was first to the rebound and looked to play in Gudjohnsen, who was crowded out. Watford looked to draw level in the later stages of the first half, as a cross by Chambers was headed clear by Kovac before Henderson sent a shot straight at Cudicini. However, it was Chelsea who nearly had the final say on the half, Kovac seeing a header hit the crossbar from a corner. Chelsea continued to dominate as the second half began. Eight minutes in, a cross from Kalou was caught by Foster, before Lampard found Kalou, who sent the shot wide. Just after the hour mark, a header by Kovac found Gudjohnsen, who played a one-two with Kalou before setting off into the area. As he looked certain to shoot, however, he was brought down by Jay Demerit. Although the away end called for a sending off, the referee kept his cards in his pocket. Nonetheless, Lampard fired the penalty into the top corner, sending Foster the wrong way. That should have been that, but four minutes later, a poor pass from Kovac was intercepted by Chambers, who passed to Kabba. Kabba got past Kovac and cut inside, before sending a shot into the net from a near-impossibly tight angle, despite Cudicini getting a hand to it, to set up a potentially nervy last 25 minutes. “Not again,” Rainbow Dash groaned, as Kick Off announced “now we have a cup-tie on our hooves!” However, Chelsea’s response was to bring Boulahrouz on and look to batten down the hatches. Watford found themselves unable to get past Mikel in the Chelsea midfield, or the Chelsea back line. Indeed, it was the visitors who looked more likely to score in the closing stages. With two minutes left, Danny Doyle was brought down by the unfortunately-named Danny Shittu, who received a yellow card for the challenge. Lampard looked to go for goal from the free kick, but was too far out. Then, in the first minute of added time, Robben sent a shot wide. Watford 1-2 Chelsea (Kabba 65; Wright-Phillips 31, Lampard pen 61) “Well, it was closer than they would have liked,” Kick Off said, “But Chelsea make it into the next round of the FA Cup. Watford, meanwhile, now only have the fight against relegation to focus on…” “Well, it was closer than I would have liked,” I said, as our train pulled out of Watford Junction, “But we won, and that’s all that matters in this competition.” Monday 15th January “I still don’t know how Chelsea lost on Saturday,” Lyra said, as she and Autumn waited for the kettle in the staff kitchen to boil, “They had, what, seven shots on target? And yet Blackburn had one and it was the only goal of the game.” “Well, that’s football,” Autumn replied. “How did Friday go, by the way?” “A lot better than before Christmas,” Lyra replied. “I’d say going to the game on Boxing Day did Ms Hooves the world of good-” “I’m amazed the three of you managed to pull it off without certain others finding out.” “I have friends where she spent Christmas,” Lyra replied. “When she found out she couldn’t bring the hammer down, she didn’t look at anything related to football for a week. Imagine if Chelsea actually do win the treble-” “Not going to happen,” Autumn responded. “They’re too far behind United and I’m still backing Barcelona for the Champions League. At any rate-” “Yes, you’ve already said so numerous times,” Lyra interjected. “It’s unnecessarily cruel, done solely to provide false hope, and the proper thing to do would be to arrange for visitation to start as soon as possible.” “At any rate,” Autumn continued, ignoring Lyra’s jibe, “the information that I was given in May gave me no other option.” Premier League Table 1 Man Utd 51pts 2 Arsenal 47pts 3 Liverpool 43pts 4 Chelsea 42pts 5 Tottenham 37pts 6 Bolton 35pts … 16 Sheffield Utd 23pts 17 Wigan 22pts 18 West Ham 18pts 19 Charlton 16pts 20 Watford 12pts