//------------------------------// // Big Oof // Story: Sisters in Sickness // by Doctor Disco //------------------------------// Celestia winced as she heard a series of coughs and a loud sneeze attack Luna’s door.  She didn’t know many illnesses or diseases that could take hold in an alicorn’s enhanced biology, but those that did were terribly unforgiving. A thousand years on a barren moon floating above Equestria definitely didn’t help prepare Luna for any of the new plagues and viruses that had broken out in that time span. It was only a matter of time. Steeling herself, Celestia knocked on Luna’s doors. “Luna, may I come in?” Another set of coughs. “What ails me should stay within these doors, sister.” An ear-piercing sneeze boomed and Celestia actually found herself reeling a little. “I would not wish this upon thee, or any other soul!” Celestia rubbed her ears and smiled. “I’ll take that as a yes.” Gingerly opening the door, she found the room in disrepair. Tissues littered the bed, stuffies were crowding around Luna, and the room was desperately trying to scream dark and brooding. In the center of it all was Luna, who sniffled and coughed even as Celestia floated in a tray of soup and bread. She sighed as she set everything on the nightstand and pulled up a stool. “It sucks, doesn’t it.” Celestia put a hoof over Luna’s. “I know, I had to go through it too.” “We would like to suggest, I mean, I w-w-w-ACHOO!” Quickly, Luna brought a tissue to her nose and blew into it, noising her disgust and groaning. “If thou wouldst, Celestia, I would ask thee to lower thy volume.” Giggling lightly, Celestia nodded. “Of course, Luna. Anything in a time of need.” Ladling some soup from the pot, she filled the bowl and took a spoonful of soup. “Now, Luna, be a good little sister and sip some of this super scrumptious sweet potato soup. Here comes the choo choo train!” Luna snorted, but relented in eating the soup all the same. “I am not a little child anymore, Celestia. I believe the last time thou didst so, er, the last time you did so I was hell-bent on making the night last forever.” Celestia pouted. “You won’t let your big sister take care of you, give you snuggles and make you feel better?” Luna glared at her for a moment before turning away and coughing into her foreleg. With a sniffle and a sigh, she lowered her head. “If you could cure of me of this ailment, you would have my thanks.” With a smile, Celestia scooped another spoonful of soup. “Of course, I shall do all I can to do so.” As Luna took the gulp and smiled weakly, Celestia continued. “It is so very nice to hear your speech getting better, sister. Modern vernacular is certainly perplexing in it’s progression through the past millennia.” “Big… if true,” Luna muttered. “That’s what I’ve been hearing foals in the streets saying.” “Huh?” Luna snorted, folding her legs. “The nobility remains sophisticated while the masses are colloquialising nearly everything and shortening sentences into words so full of meaning I am nearly lost in what to make of them.” “Oh?” Celestia giggled. “Well, I have certainly heard far worse when roaming the streets of Manehatten or Baltimare. I once heard somepony call the police on a pony who had said the word ‘peeved’, and upon being tackled to the ground after an attempt at running, yelled ‘Am I being detained!? What for?!’” Laughing at the memory, Celestia fell against the bed. After a few moments, she was able to recompose herself. Putting a hoof to her chin, Celestia’s smile turned thoughtful. “Of course, peeved isn’t much of a swear even if it is taboo, so he was probably arrested for no reason other than to give the police something to do. There isn’t much use of a police force when crime is at an all-time low.” “Is that so?” Luna asked. “Well, you certainly seem to have a lot of stories to tell. Won’t you tell me one more for bed?” Celestia smiled. “First, let me make sure we won’t be bothered. Wave Function!” A muffled “Yes, Princess Celestia!” could be heard through the door. “What is her majesty’s orders?” “Make sure we are not to be disturbed and to turn away any and all visitors.” “Yes, your majesty.” Luna quirked an eyebrow at her sister. “Are you sure that is necessary? Who would come to bother us at this time of night?” With a shake of her head, Celestia climbed into bed with her sister. “You would be surprised, Luna.” Snuggling closer and giggling as she squirmed into the sheets, Luna groaned in annoyance. “Oh, don’t be like that, Luna. You loved snuggling as much as me when we were little.” “Those are the key words, Celly,” Luna said. “When we were kids.” A set of coughs racked her body and she sneeze into another tissue. “And if you hadn’t noticed, I am terribly sick. You will catch this too if you don’t leave this room right now.” “Aw, little Lulu is afraid for her big sissy-wissy.” Celestia laughed. “Loosen up, Luna. You’re so tense! It’s like you’re hiding a secret.” “I am not!” Luna instantly boomed, making Celestia flinch. “What could possibly make you think so?!” From surprise to sly, Celestia pulled Luna closer, making the latter squeak in protest. Wrapping her wings around Luna, Celestia reveled in her warmth and the softness of her fur despite the disrepair she was in. Hugging her tightly, she was able to lock Luna in place and she rested her head on Luna’s shoulder. “So, what is this deep dark secret my little sister is hiding?” Luna squirmed in Celestia’ grip but it was too strong. Celestia made sure it was so. She could only huff in protest and sink into the embrace. It was surprisingly comfortable, even though Celestia’s antics did give Luna a headache. Snuggling closer, she nuzzled Celestia and hugged her back. “‘Tis nothing. Nothing, I say. Don’t worry about it.” “I don’t believe it is nothing.” Celestia grinned and moved closer. “Is it something personal, something you are keeping, something in your possession?” With no reaction, she continued. “How about friends? A maid? A guard?” Pausing, she went for the killer blow. “A lover.” “Alright yes will you stop bothering me now?” Luna blurted and pushed Celestia away. “My eye has been caught by an hourglass mare that visits the Royal Stellarium.” Sniffling, she grabbed a tissue and blew into it. “She studies the stars I make with such fervor and genuinity, Celestia. I couldn’t help but begin appreciating her as she came every night since my return.” Blushing, she folded her legs. “It doesn’t help that she is quite fair to the eye as well.” “Oh, well that’s too bad,” Celestia whispered, unfolding Luna’s arms and pulling her towards her again. Her warmth was just too good to pass up. “Do you know her name?” “No,” Luna sighed. “No, I do not. ACHOO!” She sniffled. “I hate being sick.” “Why don’t you hug your sister and be a good green grazer on grassier fields.” “Would you quit alliterating?” Luna grumbled. “As much as I love you as the next citizen on the street, you are getting on my nerves!” “And I’m not all over you right now?” Celestia asked, rubbing her cheek against Luna’s neck. Luna’s face blazed as she slapped Celestia lightly. “Sister, stay thy tongue! Such foul language is unwelcome in this room, and unbecoming of thy position!” “Oh, but I’m sure you would love to whisper sweet nothings to this mystery hourglass mare. You know, I could probably find out exactly who she is just by asking-” Squeezing back tightly, Celestia wheezed and Luna growled. “Thou shalt do no such thing!” “Your speech, Lulu. It’s reverting.” “‘Tis better than your attempts at getting a rise out of me.” Celestia wiggled her eyebrows. “But I am getting a rise out of you. Just a different kind.” Luna pushed Celestia away once more, and Celestia’s giggles only made her more angry. “Celestia, I love you, but if you don’t cease, I will remove you from my- from my, my-ACHOO!” Celestia sighed and magicked away all the crumpled tissues surrounding Luna, floating Luna towards her despite her protests. “You won’t be getting away from me that easily. You’re so huggable! It’s like I’m hugging a cloud, but it’s warm and rumbles when it’s angry!” “You are insufferable!” “You are adorable!” “You remind me of this one officer I had when he was unsuccessfully trying to invade the northern lands and instead allowed the Yaks to burn down the acting capital of Vanhoover. He loved the yaks, unlike the ponies at the time, and he just loved their abrasiveness so when that happened all he could do was point and laugh-" "Are you done? Did he say he also loved arson and demolition?" This time, Celestia’s pout was real. “Must you ruin all of my jokes?” “I am tired, I am grumpy, and I am sick. ‘Tis your own fault for subjecting yourself to my vengeful wrath.” “Oh you.” Celestia laughed and pulled Luna close. Oh, Celestia had missed this. She had missed it quite a lot. A thousand years and nothing could compare to the feeling of cuddling her sister. It was so very warm. A presence Celestia still couldn’t quite believe was back beside her, in her own bed and room, comforting her as she was racked with sickness. “What would I do without you, Luna? I survived for so long, and now that I have you back… it feels like a dream. Tell me I’m not dreaming, Luna. Tell me this is real.” “It is as real as you make it to be, Celestia,” Luna smiled. “And I am as real as the sun, moon, and stars that dot the sky.” “I love you, Luna.” “And I you, CelestiaaaACHOO!” Celestia winced as a spray of germs hit her face. “Sorry.” “You are forgiven.” As their breaths steadied and they wiggled closer and more comfortably together, they both slipped into the realm of dreams, where anything was possible. Unfortunately, since Luna was still recently returned from the moon, was sick, and was figuring out how much magic she should put into her dreamwalking, they landed into the dreams of a certain green and purple dragon. “I love you, Spike! Oh, you’ve saved the day once more!” Celestia blinked as she realised where she was and what exactly she was watching. Spike was posing above a pile of defeated diamond dogs with Rarity kissing his biceps. “Oh, gods and Faust above. This is Spike’s dream. Luna, what are we doing here?” “Sister, I have no idea and I wish to leave as much as the next pony.” “Buck, Luna! This is your forte! You should be able to get us out!” “Just because I am the Princess of the Night, Moon, and Dreams does not make me efficient at the job after a thousand years of inaction!” “Luna!” “Celestia!” “Hey, Princesses, whatcha doing here?” “GO AWAY AND ENJOY YOUR DREAM SPIKE!” Reeling, Spike stepped back with both arms raised. “Whoa! Jeez, relax, okay? I’m sorry.” And as the Princesses snuggled in the real world, their argument carried on for an indeterminate amount of time in the dream world while Spike enjoyed being the center of Rarity’s attention. Fin?