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// Special:  Colgate's Correspondence with Celestia Part 2 
// Story: Unpleasant Correspondence 
// by StormLuna 
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Dear Princess Celestia, 

Wait a minute, am I reading this right?  You mean to tell me that what Twilight bitches to us about sometimes is true?  You have a daughter?  Let me guess, that daughter's name is Starlight Glimmer isn't it?  No wonder you went ahead and healed Fluttershy because Faust forbid something happens to your precious little Starlight.  Let me guess, Goldner either threatened to not allow her to be ascended, threatened to never allow you to reveal her origins to her or he threatened to fuck her up psychologically and make her like boys.

Well I suppose that beats you healing that little bitch out of the goodness of your heart but do know this, I am already making plans on how I will cause Flutterbitch's quality of life to go down the toilet all while making the life of me and my friends much, much better.  We're already making plans on how we're going to do it too and let's just say that there will be some housing opportunities coming along in Canterlot before too long.  

Oh and I just thought you should know that your little Starlight and that marefriend of hers are just as good as Twilight.  They do provide us with plenty of fun but if I can add one more piece to the puzzle things will be even better.  Be sure and tell your daughter that too because if she hears it from her mama, she'll know how truly great of a job she does in keeping me and my friends happy.   

Shocked You Have a Daughter, 

Dr. M. Colgate, D.D.S. 

P.S.  I'm curious, did somepony use impregnation magic on you or did you *gasp* lower yourself down to having sex with a stallion?  If it is the latter, I am going to know that you must have either had a temporary lapse in judgement or you are hiding a very deep, dark secret from all of us.  Hell maybe I should go to the press about this if you don't let my friends and I set our plans in action for Fluttershy.  I can just see the headlines now, "Princess Celestia Secretly Bi-Sexual!  Princess Celestia Has A Love Child from a Stallion!"

Now tell me, will you let my friends and I act on our new plans for Fluttershy or should I go to the press?  Let me know so the four of us will know what plan of action to take. 





Dear Colgate, 

Now don't you dare tell a single soul, not your friends, not Twilight and especially not Starlight but yes, I am her mother.  You see, Twilight has her suspicions but Starlight has no clue about who her mother is and I certainly don't need you going and spilling the beans.  You have no clue as to how screwed up things would become if she were to find out before the time comes for her to finally learn about her origins.  It would lead to a catastrophe and likely destroy everything we all know and love.  Before you ask, it is a long story and yes it does involve the big brass not allowing it. 

Now for your other question, I did at one time have an encounter with a stallion out in Sire's Hollow.  I know it was something I should not have done but it just sort of happened.  He was charismatic and helped me up when I tripped going down the stairs as I was leaving the local tavern.  I do regret doing it but what I regret more is being so focused on the royal scandal that may have erupted over Starlight's birth that I wound up just letting her father take her without even holding her after she was born.  Hell he was even the one who named her.  

Now please don't tell anypony about this.  Telling you about it hurts enough but replaying the night of her birth in my mind hurts even worse.  You have no idea how hard it is for me to try and act normally around her.  You have no idea how much it hurts for the big brass to not allow me to reveal my daughter's origins to her.  I would really appreciate it if you didn't because a secret this dark being revealed to her by anypony but me or her father could destroy the close relationship I have with her. 

Hoping You Won't Say Anything, 

Princess Celestia