The next day, ZP says he was able to get Halford and Stratovarius.
“They just want to know where to start touring with us,” he says.
“How about nowhere?” Didier says. Everypony ignores him.
“Of course we’ll start in Britain, out band is based here after all!” Hoofman says.
The next day, ZP says he got them to start in Oxford, Britain. The band excitedly cheers and prepares to go on tour. As they load up the touring coach, a variant of a taxi that’s larger, Diccon is still flying.
“I’m sorry Diccon, but you’re not flying all on tour.” Hoorman says.
Diccon sighs and lands, loading his bass onto the coach. They hop inside.
“I know this is going to be plenty of fun,” Diccon says.
“Great fun,” Didier says dryly while looking out the window to the bustling cityscape outside.
“It’s going to be as fun as a crocodile attack with Didier here,” Sam snarks.
“Guys, the tour is what you make it, let’s enjoy it while it lasts,” Vadim says.
Eventually, they get to the stadium. Rob Halford is there to greet them.
“Hey PonyHeart, Stratovarius is also here, do you think you could go first?”
The band nods, and sets their instruments up. When the time arrives, they walk out and there’s about three ponies there. PonyHeart gets their instruments set up, and decide to go as they are.
“So, we’re PonyHeart, Halford and Stratovarius are here too, and we have, ummm, four songs for you today.”
Sam audibly facehoofed at ZP,”He doesn’t know how to coax a crowd does he? Great frontman we hired,” Sam whispers to Hoofman.
The excuse for a crowd is whispering too,”They could only hire a zebra, not an actual pony?”
A bead of sweat drops down ZP’s face, he decides he has to get his act together.”I’m ZP Theart. Who’s ready to bucking rock!” ZP wrenches the mic out of the stand and kicks the stand down.”We’re going to play four songs you ponies likely have never heard before! We’re here to promote our album, Valley of the Damned. First things first, the title track, Valley of the Damned!”
The band, not expecting this, realized every other song required a unique setup. So they played Valley of the Damned, a bit clumsily, as they hadn’t practiced.
“That was PonyHeart! Our next song will be Revelations! I hope you are bucking ready!” ZP shouts.
The band plays Revelations, and Hoofman flips the lights off.
“Vadim, I need you to sing Starfire.” Herman takes the piano and moves it towrds him.”We need to get everything ready for Disciples of Canterlot.”
The band takes a trip backstage, and Hoofman flips on the lights. Vadim is seated at the piano, sliding his hooves across it to perform a glissando.
“I’ll be performing Starfire, I hope everypony enjoys, and I apologize in case I screw up.”
He plays some chords and starts singing Starfire, for a teenager, his voice is great. The audience is interested by this change, and wonders where the rest of the band went. They had gathered a small crowd who were curious what all the noise was about. Vadim performs a watered-down version of Starfire, excluding guitars and drums. Eventually, ZP comes back on stage.
“That was Starfire! Vadim was great as he always is. Next up, we have a song we really want to perform, Disciples of Canterlot!”
The band starts up the song, and despite the occasional clumsiness, it’s really good. For the jazzy part, Diccon plays his bass fill, and Hoofman telekinetically gives him and Sam acoustic guitars. They play the acoustics well. After it is over, ZP says,”That was all everypony! You can really bucking rock! We have a couple guest artists, and we’d like to show you them. Please welcome, Halford!”
PonyHeart heads backstage and Halford takes their place on stage. Hoofman says,”Everypony, we need to have a setlist for this and practice more. I think it’s good as-is, but we still need the practice.”
“All I felt was boredom, incredible boredom,” Didier says.
“Music not good enough?” Sam says,”Next thing you know, you’ll be slipping hard cider into my morning coffee to make me an alcoholic.”
Didier chuckles.
“That wasn’t very good,” ZP says.
“Thank you Captain Obvious.” Sam snarks.
“Where’s that fun tour I wanted?” Diccon says.
“We’ll get over it eventually, everything will be fine,” Vadim says.
“Anyways, where’s our next destination?” Hoofman asks.
“Prance maybe, we could get some fans there.”
The band agrees and sits and listens to the music going on in the background.
PonyHeart hops into the touring coach.”We’ll be going to Paris, Prance next,” Hoofman says.
Halford and Stratovarius agree to meet them there, and PonyHeart hops into the coach for a long ride.
Diccon stares bored outside of the window.”Are we there yet?” He asks.
“No, Diccon, not since you asked 30 minutes ago.” Sam says.
“We’re gonna go insane on these long rides.” Diccon strums his bass.
“Already there,” Didier says.
The coach heads onto P20, precisely 2 hours into the route.
“What the hell will we do for 4 hours?” Didier says.
“I have no clue, but we should stop by a hotel when we get to Paris so we can rest up before out next concert.” Hoofman says.
3 hours later, PonyHeart stops by a convenience store to get some dinner. They pick up some food, and Didier leaves the shop with a case of hard cider.
“I don’t want to know what you’e doing with that, do I?” Hoofman asks.
“No, and you definitely shouldn’t.” Didier fills up a few flasks with it.
PonyHeart gets back on the road.
An hour later, they hit Paris. They check into a hotel with free breakfast, and decide to unwind for the night.
The room is very unassuming, containing just two beds, PonyHeart ordered 3 different rooms for the 6 members of the band. Hoofman and Sam get put together.
“I pity whoever got placed with Didier, they must hate it.” Sam unpacks his guitar. “Say, Hoofman, want to have a jam session?”
“What should we play?” Hoofman asks.
“Whiplash, that’s a good one.” Sam tunes his guitar like a bass.
“How will we play it? The song is partially driven by Hesher’s bassline.”
Sam dirches his pick and starts playing the bassline. Hoofman sees exactly what he’s doing, and starts to playing the guitar part.
After they finish, Hoofman asks,”What was that for.”
“Well, it’s practice, also, I brought no books. I was bored.”
Hoofman nods,”Let’s wait for tomorrow, then we’ll see what happens.”
The next day came up, and they sat down to eat breakfast.
“Didier, pass me some coffee,” Sam says.
“How do you want me to give you it?” Didier asks, getting out a flask of hard cider.
“Slide it down the table, also, Didier, why the heck do you sound happy?”
“Just giving this PonyHeart thing another try.” Didier fills up a coffee and adds hard cider.
Hoofman takes a minute to observe the room, there are ponies talking at various tables around the room. They are either getting their food, or sitting down. Around the room are various art pieces hanging on the walls. Hoofman turns to Sam.”Nice place, isn’t it?” Hoofman asks.
“I hadn’t noticed, this coffee also tastes funny. I like it, but it’s so weird. Didier, what did you put in this?”
“Just some 50 Proof hard cider, two creams, and a sugar.”
“Another one please, also, you shouldn’t say your secret plan out loud.” Sam turns towards Hoofman,”The bugger actually did it.”
Hoofman was more worried about the fact that Sam wanted more spiked coffee than the fact Didier actually did it. Sam received another spiked coffee and drank it. Didier was talking to ZP about Hair Metal, and giving him headphones to listen to it, seemed innocuous. He was also looking at Diccon like he woild be great outside of the band.
Hoofman was a little worried about these things, but they weren’t too bad. He’d just have to wait for tonight’s show.
PonyHeart trots up on stage. Hoofman realizes that the band didn’t practice, so they would deliver a poor show.
They perform the same song lineup they performed last time, after it is over, ZP says,”Thank you every bucking one of you ponies! Enjoy the other two bands we have lined up for you!”
They head backstage, and ZP turns to the band.”I wonder how long this tour will go on?”
“Hopefully as short as possible,” Didier says.
“We can only wait and find out,” Vadim says.