//------------------------------// // 74 A Dab of Ink, Part Five // Story: Continuity Disrupted // by Doug Graves //------------------------------// Doug relaxes into the two lounge chairs set next to each other, the combination able to accommodate his longer length. Aloe, having already mudded up the two latecomers, stays a forelegs length away as she expertly covers his face with a green goop. Two cucumber slices cover his eyes, though the half plates reach nearly to his hairline and down to his mouth. Their chairs are arranged in a loose circle, Rarity, then Shining Armor on his right and Twilight Sparkle on his left, with Twilight Velvet and Night Light across. Everypony else seems content to lay on their chairs, leaving Doug unable to pull Sparkle away for a quick interrogation session of his own. None of the other in-laws of the herd had seen fit to treat him with such naked hostility. Actually, that’s not quite true; he briefly met Rarity’s parents, and heard offhand that they had sold their Ponyville house, choosing to continue their exploration of Equestria. Rarity never mentions them, and he hasn’t seen any results from trying to stay in contact with them so they can finally meet. Pinkie Pie hasn’t taken her foals to see Igneous and the others at the rock farm, and barely mentions her Pie Sister Best Friend Forever Maud. He always figured she would plan some sort of road trip to see them. Or maybe she is waiting until the foals are older, but it’s not that far of a walk. One Twilight speaks up, “Well, this is a lot more enjoyable than I originally thought it would be! Thank you, Rarity.” Rarity’s voice lilts softly, Doug imagining the mare waving the complement off with her hoof despite nopony able to see the gesture. “Oh, think nothing of it, darling. I’m glad you are enjoying yourself. We should certainly do this more often!” Twilight says, “So, what’s next? Oh, I wish Spike was here to help record this!” The mare squishes around as if trying to see through her cucumbers, hooves tapping around the floor as if she is trying to find a piece of paper lying around, though the spa is unfortunately devoid, not littered with spare paper as the library is. Rarity answers, “Horn and hoof filing. I do believe I chipped a hoof running around with Doug yesterday. Oh, Twilight, your hooves must be positively dreadful after the rigor you put them through! I can’t imagine spending the night with my hooves in that state!” “Oh, it wasn’t that bad,” Twilight says immediately, though the sound of two hooves grating against each other soon rings out. “Huh. Doug, I’m sorry if I hurt you last night.” “Eh, it was fine,” Doug says, idly fingering a few of the lighter scrapes from Twilight Sparkle’s rough hooves. He had just done more pressing and less sliding against them, or keeping her hooves against the floor. Harder to do when she wanted to cuddle, though. “So,” Twilight says, the voice slightly off, “I hear you have eight foals, yes?” Ah, it must be Velvet. “Yes. Three with Applejack, two with Pinkie Pie, and one with the rest.” “Five earth pony foals? Hmm.” Doug can hear the quiet sigh, his own face frowning against the mud. “And only one unicorn?” Doug tries to stay upbeat, “Yup. Can’t say the earth pony fillies are any easier to handle than the others. All of them love to explore around, get into everything they can.” Velvet scoffs, “Well, that can’t be right. A unicorn foal should be at the very least an order of magnitude more difficult than an earth pony. You are training her, correct?” “Of course we are training her,” comes Rarity’s exasperated groan, though Doug can tell she is trying to be polite about it. “There are just some… unfortunate realities that may not be overcome strictly through a harsher regimen, much as Rainbow likes to try with Scootaloo.” “Really?” asks Sparkle, Doug having trouble picking the two apart. “Is that why she’s always taking her out in the morning, doing those exercises?” Rarity answers, “Yes, and it’s done wonders for her confidence, but sadly little for her flight.” She sighs, her mind running over the various exercises she and Trixie have put Sweetie Belle through; there has certainly been some improvement, but the filly is sadly not up to the par of her classmates. “A pegasus who can’t fly?” Velvet exclaims, a shudder in her voice. “It’s no wonder you only have the one filly with Rainbow, but how on Equus did’ja convince the second pegasus to join your herd?” Silence pervades the room for a few seconds. Doug groans to himself; somehow, getting in a shouting match with Sparkle’s dam doesn’t seem like the best call. But, to a unicorn who measures status and worth by how many thaums a horn can put out, or how fast a pegasus can fly? What do you say to that? It was the same way for Fluttershy, too. She lived alone among the animals for the longest time because she had been teased for her poor flying during her early years. Convinced herself she was a terrible flier and lacked the confidence to push against that, the whole situation becoming a self fulfilling prophecy. And one that ultimately left her reclusive, unwilling to take the chance with dating. With Hedge, she certainly has the filly practice her flying when she can, but she doesn’t have the same brutal emphasis that Rainbow Dash has with Scootaloo on how important flying is. And striving, day in and day out, on improving her skills. Velvet huffs, “It’s no wonder they put you through those earth pony games. Probably trying to convince you that living like an earth pony ain’t so bad.” “Hey!” nearly shouts Sparkle, the loud thump of a hoof against the floor. “These are my Friends you are talking about! And you should talk about them with respect!” “And, don’tcha know, these are your future foals! There’s a reason you don’t see mixed herds. How are they gonna get into Princess Celestia’s School if they struggle with magic? Every pegasus wants to be a Wonderbolt, known for their, hmm, what again? How are they going to reach those goals if you hobble them from the start?” Doug’s deep voice rings out, “There’s a lot more to life than how fast you fly or how much you can lift.” “Please, dear, the mares are talking here,” Velvet says dismissively. Doug grits his teeth; though he can hear light grumbles from Shining Armor, he can’t hear anything from Night Light. You’d think one of them would stand up against Velvet with him. But they probably have years of listening to this vitriol. At least the rapid intake of breath from Rarity convinces him that not every pony in the room agrees with Velvet. Though she sounds less than convinced of the words she is saying Sparkle yells, “You shouldn’t be so dismissive of him, dam. Lots of stallions help out, all across Equestria!” Doug can practically hear the eyes rolling behind the cucumbers, “Sure, in the bedroom. And how many stallions are out there, leaders, movers, shakers? You should know, your brother is the exception that proves the rule!” Rarity meekly offers, as if she knows the rebuttal that is coming, “Well, I know there are a lot of designers…” “Oh. Sure. Famous fashion ponies are stallions, what a surprise.” A long sigh escapes Velvet’s mouth. Doug involuntarily snorts; all the stallions in the fashion field that Rarity has told him about certainly fit that bill. And while he can name a few more prominent stallions, very few of them are leaders, instead capping out in middle management positions. Or the hard workers at the bottom of the totem pole. Big Mac, for all his prowess in the fields, generally yields to Applejack and Granny Smith on the big decisions concerning the farm. At the long pause that follows Velvet continues, “And even then Shiny is the product of a long line of unicorns. Ask yourself this. Of the mares in your herd, how many are from a mixed race couple?” The seconds pass, Doug searching for some example to prove Velvet wrong. Even Trixie has two unicorns for parents. He eventually admits, “None of them.” “What do you know, he can be taught.” Velvet pauses as if collecting her thoughts, “Now, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be allowed to date and marry whoever you want. Faust knows that love moves in mysterious ways and all that malarkey. But progress is made on the edges, don’tcha know. And having a foal, even if they’re a prince of all trades, ain’t gonna make the cut. Specialization, now there’s a reliable way of improving yourself. You don’t see Rarity trying to drink her soup with a sewing needle, even if she’s more practiced with one than any mare I know, because a needle is a specialized tool.” “But specializing to that degree means it is even more important to have a diverse field of talents, maybe not concentrated in one pony but across lots of ponies.” “And the best way to avoid wasting that specialization is to avoid destroying the very thing you’re trying to concentrate. An earth pony with a superb gift for magic is nothing compared to a unicorn with the same. Why do you think Twilight Sparkle is the Element of Magic instead of Applejack?” Doug interjects, “Well, a lot of innovation happens from applying diverse techniques in a different field, in an unexpected or novel way. Like, how many unicorn miners are out there?” “Miners?” Velvet exclaims, puzzled at the unexpected question. “Maybe a foremare or two, but that’s an earth pony field. And you’ll never see a pegasus there.” “Well, what about using a unicorn like Rarity to find the gem deposits, or veins of precious metals?” Doug shrugs, “I’m sure a pegasus could find a way to help. Maybe purifying the air or something.” “Sure, sure. But, you know what the problem with that is?” Velvet’s voice drops to almost a whisper, “Then, there would be nothing left for earth ponies to do. They grow crops, until a unicorn figures out a better way. There already are cider machines, and juice presses, and I’ve seen the design on a contraption to clear snow. They can haul ponies and cargo and trains around, until the unicorn designed, thaumic powered engines replace them. Then they can become masseurs, fit only for serving. Is that what you want?” “Of course not,” Doug immediately replies. “I’m sure earth ponies could design and build and repair those machines, to say nothing of the creative pursuits should their old jobs be obsoleted. And that’s a huge reason not to become too specialized, too focused on any one field. Like Rarity; if the fashion business dies, for some reason, we can always go gem collecting in the Badlands. But we’d probably need to get her new horseshoes for that.” Velvet’s voice sounds oddly agreeable, “And everypony needs a farrier. But you don’t want your fillies to dream about someday replacing their dam as town farrier, do you?” “I don’t see anything wrong with that,” Doug says. “They’re in the best position to apprentice and train them, teach them from the very first moment they can hold hoof to hammer. Meringue is certainly intent on replacing me on the farm, keeping track of inventory and orders and whatnot. I should be proud that they aspire to do what I, or their other parents, do.” Doug smirks under his mud mask, alternating turning his head towards Rarity and Twilight, “And, besides, I’d say I have a pretty whorsed out toolbox of trades to choose from, wouldn’tcha know?” There is a brief moment of silence before the clop of hooves on the floor briefly startles Doug. Velvet happily, almost apologetically says, “And I hope that any foals you and Sparkle have aspire to be just like you. A lofty goal, certainly, but if they are as obstinate and headstrong as you, then you’ll have no trouble at all.” Doug pulls the cucumbers off his eyes, trying to decide on a glare or to meet Velvet’s smile with his own. He finally decides on a smirk, though his eyes still warily watch her. A hoof lightly hitting his right shoulder gets Doug to turn. Shining Armor is there, smiling and holding his hoof up; Night Light is behind him, also smiling and nodding along. “Great job, dude. I knew you didn’t need us to step in!” Doug bumps the offered hoof, though he turns to Velvet. “So that was all a test?” “All?” Velvet shakes her head, “No, I didn’t lie about anything. Offered unpopular, maybe even divisive opinions on things, sure. But too many ponies will come at you with those lines or worse, and I can’t have somepony who isn’t able to defend my Sparkle or her foals, now can I?” Doug turns to Twilight Sparkle. She is again beaming at him, her eyes half lidded and far more relaxed for what he thought was a harrowing situation. Apparently she really gets off on him passing a test or something.