//------------------------------// // 1 - The Horrible Truth // Story: Some Mistakes Are Forever // by Holy //------------------------------// The familiar sheen of the Polaroid picture flashed as Sunset held it up to the light. The crowd full of all those goofy, toothy, genuine smiles filled the image to the brim. Her eyes traced across the familiar faces of her classmates, disheveled hair and dirt-stained athletic clothes adorned most of them, but they all smiled just the same. In the center, Sunset recognized her own goofy smile, a warming sight considering how many of those friends had hated her only a year before. Sunset set the picture down onto the blank page titled 'Field Day', proud to immortalize one of her favorite memories for all of her friends. Her palm steadied her chin as she enjoyed the moment looking across all the smiling faces. A sense of pride embraced her as she thought of all of their names and a handful of happy memories she'd made with all of them since the Fall Formal. Sunset couldn't help but let a soft smile spread across her face at the regret finally fading from those awful years. Sunset's smile grew even wider as she turned her attention back to the massive pile of photos she still had to go over. The deadline for their senior yearbook was getting a little too close for comfort and she had to make sure it would be absolutely perfect. With a deep breath and a confident grin, Sunset pulled a few photos out of the pile and looked across some of the older yearbooks set out in front of her, eager to use any of the best ideas she found in the older copies. Sunset did her best to ignore the cackling and conversation of her friends as they carried on behind her. The end of the day might be more relaxed for them, but Sunset was determined. Vibrant colors and smiling kids filled the pages as she flipped through the old ones. The old yearbook committees didn't seem quite as dedicated, but considering the uncomfortable lack of joy across everyone's faces they seemed to have their work cut out for them. A pang of guilt seized Sunset for a moment as she realized she was probably the reason for that, considering this was their sophomore yearbook. She glanced back up to the field day photo to disperse the awful realization, a gentle and welcome reminder that her past wasn't today. Her left hand absentmindedly flipped through the old sophomore yearbook in the meantime, brushing past the awkward headshots she'd seen a thousand times. Out of the corner of her eye, Sunset caught a different face she wasn't as familiar with. She put a stop to her page-thumbing and spread out the page to catch the name. His darker hair and lack of smile made Sunset's heart sink. Her eager grin quickly turned into a frown as the memories flooded back to her. Soloman Tary... Sunset fidgeted in her seat for a moment as she winced at the memory of spreading some awful rumors about him. These days it was a rare sight to find someone she hadn't apologized to yet, but as Sunset mentally cataloged her classes she couldn't seem to remember his face in any of them. She flipped through a few more pages, seeing his face again in the AV club. "Did you hear us, Sunset?" Rarity asked. Sunset blinked a few times, then spun around in her chair to face her friends. "Oh, uh, what was it?" Twilight Sparkle perked up. "We were asking if you wanted to go to Sugarcube Corner or hang out at your place today." "We're having a sale on triple-decker ice cream sundaes! We've gotta hurry over before they run out," Pinkie said, desperation at the edges of her voice as she bounced up and down in her own chair. Rainbow Dash waved her off. "Yeah, well Sunset got a copy of the new Tirek's Revenge. I wanna see some gameplay before somebody ends up spoiling it. Again," she says, casting an irritated glare over at Applejack. "Ain't my fault you couldn't get past the third level. Maybe y'all should'a just... what was it? 'Gotten good'?" she said with a smug smirk. Rainbow Dash made sure to shoot another glare back at her in return. "Oh, well, whatever you guys want to do," Sunset said before pursing her lips and holding up the yearbook. "Do any of you guys remember what happened to this guy?" she said, pointing at Soloman. "Oh, Mr. Tary?" Rarity said, a slight grimace forming on her face. "I believe he moved away. Good riddance, I say. Hopefully somewhere far away from any elementary schools." Rainbow Dash let out a laugh. "Yeah, one less pedophile is always a good thing." "I hope the little girls he was around are okay, that kind of thing can cause a lot of damage," Fluttershy interjected. Twilight blinked a few times. "Wow, you guys had an actual pedophile in your class?" "Guys!" Sunset yelled out, frustration building up inside her. She took a moment to take a breath to try to calm herself down. "None of you actually believe that stuff do you?" They all turned to her with raised eyebrows. "What do you mean, darling? You do recall when that police car came to pick him up, do you not?" Sunset shook her head. "That was me, remember? I... I made up those rumors and I made a whole show of it so everyone would believe it." Even saying it out loud put a sour taste in her stomach. Her eyes shot between all of her friends, then fell to look down at her boots. "All because he wouldn't steal AV equipment for me..." Sunset mumbled to herself, that familiar disappointment at her past nastiness overwhelming her. "Oh..." the girls said in unison, their eyes dropping down to the floor as well. Twilight put on a sheepish smile. "Well, if he moved at least he could've gotten away from those nasty rumors, right?" "Oh, well, surely. He's probably enjoying some new friends at a new school, so it's nothing to worry about, dear," Rarity said, waving her hand at Sunset. Rainbow shrugged. "And it's not like that's the worst thing you've done either, remember that time you made Fluttershy-- oof, hey!" Applejack gave her a quick jab into the arm, followed by a harsh glare and a shake of her head. A sinking feeling gripped at her stomach. Sunset shook her head at the weak reassurances. "Do you guys know where he might have moved to? Or if anyone still talks to him?" "Oh! Oh! Wallflower does! She ordered a birthday cake with his name on it two years ago. Double chocolate ice cream cake with cookie dough on top. It looked great! I had to make one for myself after she picked it up," Pinkie said. Twilight shot a perplexed look over at her friend. "How do you remember a single order from that long ago?" Pinkie narrowed her eyes, her face suddenly turning serious. "I always remember birthday cakes." Her friends all rolled their eyes and let out a quick chuckle, but Sunset couldn't ignore the growing pit in her stomach. Her mind was already pulling her towards her phone to set up some plans. "I'll have to catch you guys later, I'm going to talk to Wallflower once school is out." Rainbow Dash let out a groan before Applejack playfully nudged her. "Don't you worry none, once I get my copy I can kick yer butt up and down the driveway on it." "You wish!" Rainbow said with a shove back. Twilight scooted over beside Sunset and leaned in for a whisper while everyone else went at it. "You want me to go with you? It might make it a little less awkward." Sunset gave her friend a smile. "I'm pretty sure she doesn't hate me anymore, Twilight. Besides, I couldn't in good conscience let you miss out on that sundae," Sunset said with a gentle nudge against her shoulder. "It shouldn't take long, so I'll probably catch up with you guys there anyway." Twilight opened her mouth to say something but stopped herself halfway through. Her mouth twisted in concern as she mulled over something in her head. "You know... you don't have to do this, Sunset." "Huh?" Sunset asked with a raised eyebrow. Twilight looked down at the floor between them, the confidence draining from her expression. "It's just... every time this happens you get... well..." Sunset shot her a confused, almost hostile glare, making Twilight wince. "Is it a bad thing to want to make up for the things I've done?" Twilight shakes her head. "Well, no, of course not." "Then what is it?" Sunset asks, reeling back for a moment at the defensiveness in her own voice. Twilight pursed her lips again, then looked back into Sunset's eyes with genuine concern. "Well... look, every time you find someone that you did something bad to, you get really obsessive about it. It's like you have to be friends at all costs and it can sometimes be..." "I can't just not make an attempt, Twilight. You don't know what it's like to have that kind of guilt weighing on you." Twilight let out a sigh. "I know... but do you remember that time you were trying to talk to that boy that didn't want anything to do with you? Heath, I think? You found out he wanted a new bike and ended up spending like three hundred dollars to get it for him." Sunset cocked her head in confusion. "Yeah? He said it was the greatest thing anyone has ever done for him. Might not have made up for everything but we're friends now. What's wrong with that?" "You couldn't help pay for the rooms for our beach trip, remember? We all agreed to chip in but Rarity had to help pay your share and then you could hardly do anything with us because you didn't have any money to spare." "Oh... I..." Sunset's eyes traced down to the floor again. She'd never even tried to link those two problems together, only remembering how kind her friends were in a 'rough time'. "I didn't..." "Yeah..." Sunset took in a deep breath and looked back over to the yearbook photo. "I don't think I can just not do anything, Twi." Twilight let out another sigh and nodded her head. "I thought you might say that... Just... don't get so carried away it affects the rest of your life. Sometimes you can't fix everything and I think that's okay. I know I might not have gone through anything like you did, but I do know what it's like to get so lost in something other people start getting hurt." A reassuring smile crosses her lips and Sunset returns it once she feels that comforting hand on her forearm. "We're here for you, okay? Even when others might not be." She couldn't help but nod. "Thanks, Twi. I'll do my best not to, you know," Sunset said, not even sure if she was telling the truth herself. "Just be careful, okay?" Sunset put on her amused grin as she remembered Soloman—she could probably beat him in arm wrestling herself. "I haven't had someone attack me yet and I doubt he'll be the one to do it, Twilight," she said, halfway playfully. Twilight rolled her eyes. "That's not what I mean. I'm just saying maybe this time an apology might be enough." Sunset wanted to shake her head and roll her eyes. Words were cheap and Sunset couldn't remember a time when just that was ever enough, but as she looked back up to her friend's concerned face she could only give her a soft nod. "Alright, I'll try not to go overboard this time. One apology... and maybe a pizza or a cake or something." Twilight rolled her eyes with an amused smile. "Well, that won't bankrupt you at least." Both girls looked up to the ceiling as the period bell blared throughout the halls. Rainbow, Pinkie, and Applejack bolted for the door to their afternoon plans, followed closely by an unamused Rarity and Fluttershy. They all traded a few short goodbyes before disappearing into the flood of students filling the halls. Sunset brushed all of her own things into her backpack, eager to get out for the day as well. Sunset shook the doubts out of her head and stood up. "It'll be okay, Twilight. I've gotten pretty good at making it up to people. I bet I'll see you at Sugarcube Corner in a few hours, tops." Twilight gave a soft nod, but her eyes didn't share her eagerness. Sunset didn't pay much attention to the disappointment in those purple eyes any longer as she swung up her backpack to rest the sling on her shoulder and make her own way out into the flood of students, a growing nervousness in her stomach as she started the familiar process of finding the best way to apologize. Despite Twilight's warnings, a warm, comfortable feeling eased her worries as her mind fantasized about another happy friend she could pull away from the darkness she'd thrown them into in those awful years. The sound of dozens of students' distant voices filled the sidewalk leading up to CHS. The constant rapping of shoes against the concrete was accompanied by the rhythmic and impatient tapping of Sunset's boot as her eyes darted around the crowd. Sunset craned her neck in and around the students, looking for that familiar head of long, green hair. Frustration quickly filled Sunset's system as she let out an anxious groan. It was more time she got to figure out what she wanted to say, but Sunset couldn't help but want to speed up the process. A mixture of excitement and nervousness gripped at her stomach as she imagined finally getting to talk to him, but the thought of seeing a smile on his face and hearing him say they were friends now eased her troubled mind. Sunset pursed her lips as she looked down at her fidgeting hands, a little desperate to make a few notes to organize her mental strategy. Maybe Twilight was right... maybe this was a little too obsessive, but Sunset knew if she couldn't get this sorted she'd never be able to live with herself. Knowing that someone out there was still living with the trauma she gave them made her stomach twist uncomfortably, even if she'd apologized to the vast majority of the people she'd hurt. Sunset pushed her friend's words out of her mind; this was too important. "Hey," Wallflower said with an accompanying tap on Sunset's shoulder. The sudden touch made Sunset jump and spin around in fear as it ripped her out of her train of thought. Instead of the threat her body tensed up to face, Wallflower stood behind her with a raised eyebrow. Sunset let out a sigh of relief and relaxed her stance. "Oh, hey, Wallflower. You've really got to stop sneaking up on me like that," Sunset said, giving her friend a playful punch to the arm. Wallflower looked down to her arm, then back up to Sunset with slightly furrowed brows. "I walked right up to you? I even called out your name twice when I was coming over." Sunset blinked in surprise and then gave her a sheepish smile. "Oh... right. Sorry. So, you ready to go?" Wallflower's face quickly adopted an excited smile at the prospect. "Yeah, definitely. You want to go to the new coffee shop down the street or the usual one downtown?" "I was actually meaning to try the new one. I've heard they've got some really comfy leather chairs. It's also closer and I don't really feel like walking that far," Sunset said, waving for Wallflower to follow as she began down the sidewalk. Wallflower eagerly hopped forward to match Sunset's stride. The bright smile on her face was a nice change from her seething hatred during the whole memory stone incident. The warm, fuzzy feeling returned to Sunset at the sight of her smiling friend. "So, how have things been? Did you like the party we threw for you?" Wallflower let off a gentle nod. "Yeah, actually. I usually hate parties, but that one was actually really fun. I couldn't believe how many people actually remembered me." Sunset put on her usual satisfied and confident smile. "Well, sometimes people just need a little push to reconnect with the people that matter. One of Pinkie's parties definitely doesn't hurt either, huh?" Wallflower let out a quick laugh and her face betrayed a little fondness being told she mattered. "Yeah, no kidding. I couldn't believe how many people wanted to join the gardening club after that. I've even been hanging out with Daisy and Derpy more. Things have... well they've definitely gotten a lot better." The warm, fuzzy feeling of a satisfied friend absorbed Sunset entirely, melting away her worries into her satisfied smile. "I'm really glad things have turned around for you. If there's any other way I can help..." Wallflower smiled over at Sunset. "Thanks, Sunset. I'm just surprised you still want to hang out with me at all, considering what happened," she said, her fingers nervously fiddling with her long locks of hair. Sunset placed a reassuring hand on Wallflower's shoulder. "Well I turned into a raging she-demon and enslaved half of the school and my friends still seem to want to hang out with me. Always could have been worse, you know." "Right..." "Looks like we're here," Sunset said, taking a moment outside the glass doors to appreciate the modern, brown aesthetic. Sunset held the glass door open for her friend and followed her into the ordering line. The shop was bustling with students just out of school and alive with the sounds of friendly conversation. Sunset's eyes flicked around the shop until she found her target: two huge leather chairs that enticed her over with their sweet, enveloping comfort. A quick pulse of nervousness gripped at Sunset as they put in their orders. Did she rehearse bringing the subject up? Did she remember the word choice she picked out? Maybe she should have made notes. She shook her head lightly. She'd always figured things out before—this wouldn't be a big deal. "Come on, over here before someone else snags them," Sunset said, putting in a quickness to her step to reach them while still careful to not spill her frappuccino. Sunset set her drink down on the table and threw herself down into the chair, enjoying the feeling of sinking into the massive leather cushion before watching Wallflower gently sit down herself, her eyes going wide for a moment as she sank back too. "Wooah..." Wallflower said, putting out her arms to try to steady herself. Sunset couldn't help but let out a giggle. "Pretty great, right?" Wallflower shared her smile as soon as she found her balance again. "Heh, yeah, I guess so. So, what do you want to talk about? I know I'm not that interesting but—" "Hey, don't sell yourself short. I enjoy hanging out from time to time. Though... I actually wanted to ask you something." Wallflower takes a quick sip out of her cup, then looks up to Sunset. "Oh, what's up?" "So I was going through our sophomore yearbook today and I found someone I don't see around that much. His name was Soloman. When I asked the girls Pinkie said you were still good friends with him. You wouldn't happen to still talk to him, would you? I realized I never actually apologized to him and everyone told me they thought he ended up moving somewhere." Sunset poked around her drink as she talked, then looked up for an answer. Sunset's heart sank and the pit in her stomach throbbed as she watched Wallflower's expression immediately sour. Her mouth turned into a surprised scowl, almost as if she was wondering why Sunset would ever consider asking her that. Sunset opened her mouth to try to ease the situation, but Wallflower started first. "Are you serious?" Wallflower said in a cutting voice just barely holding back a sea of anger. "Is... is something wrong?" Sunset asked nervously. She fidgeted in her seat, unable to meet Wallflower's gaze as she stared her down. Sunset tried to reassure herself about their friendship but Wallflower's gaze felt more like hatred. "How do you not know? Have you seriously—" Wallflower cut herself off with a scoff and shook her head. "Look, I'm happy you want to be friends with me, but I really don't appreciate you joking about what happened like this." Panic seized Sunset's body and she quickly leaned forward out of the comfort of the cushion to be closer to her friend. Her pulse quickened as she gulped and tried desperately to find something to say. "Wallflower... I... I promise it's not a joke. I'm sorry if I said something wrong. I really just wanted to talk to him so I could make things right." Wallflower's flared anger subsided as she blinked in confusion instead. She stared at Sunset across the table letting the moment hang in the air and Sunset grow even more terrified by the second. "You... You really don't know, do you?" "Know what, Wallflower?" she said with a breath of relief. With the anger off of her, her own confusion took hold instead. Wallflower looked to the floor for a moment, searching her mind for something. Finally, she took a deep breath and let out a somber sigh as she looked back up at Sunset with pity and concern in her eyes. "Sunset... I don't know how to tell you this, but..." Wallflower took in another deep breath and opened her mouth, but couldn't get the words out. The tension replaced any relief Sunset had. Her mind danced with horrible possibilities and every second raked up more dread. She brought herself up out of her chair and placed her hands on the table. "Wallflower, please just tell me." Wallflower couldn't help but lean back at the sudden, imposing presence, unable to meet her eyes. "Alright! Look, Sunset... he... he killed himself last year." All of the feelings faded out of Sunset's body. Her vision quickly blurred and the rest of the chatter and soft music around the coffee shop turned to static as Sunset's mind struggled to comprehend the words she just heard. An uncomfortable numbness teased at her skin. Sunset blinked wildly to try to bring herself back to reality. She took a deep breath and looked back over at her friend, hoping she didn't just hear what she thought she did. "Sunset?" Wallflower asked as she timidly looked up. "I... what? Y-you're... you're just messing with me, right?" she asked, a massive lump forming in her throat she could barely speak past. "This isn't... it's not..." Sunset tried to breathe in, to put on a friendly smile hoping Wallflower would tell her she was just kidding. The longer Wallflower just sat there uncomfortably, staring back up at her, the harder it was for Sunset to get in a breath. Wallflower relaxed and took in another deep breath before looking down to her drink. "I really wish I was." "No..." Sunset whispered, her vision blurring again. The energy holding her legs up suddenly dropped out of her and she slumped unceremoniously back into her chair. The soft cushions weren't quite so comforting anymore. "I'm sorry I have to be the one to tell you, Sunset, but you know how bad he ended up. I couldn't—" "There's no way I..." Tears stung the edges of Sunset's eyes and chilled her cheeks as they silently ran down them. "This isn't real... it can't be..." Sunset's eyes stared down at the table but saw nothing as she was sucked into the torrent of her own mind. "Sunset, there's nothing we can do about it anymore," Wallflower said, a gentle sorrow building up in her voice. "Nobody knows how hard it is as much as I do, but..." The gentle, rhythmic breaths that Sunset had walked into the shop with were long gone, now replaced by frantic, strained breaths as Sunset desperately tried to get some air. Wallflower's words faded into the background completely as Sunset lost touch with her reality. She closed her eyes tightly, waiting for some sign that this was just a dream and she was about to wake up, but no mercy like that would grace her now. Sunset wanted to grab her head and scream, but her body wasn't listening to her anymore. She opened her eyes to blurry, tear-filled vision hoping she would just wake up in her apartment already, but no matter how hard she tried Wallflower was still there sitting across from her, the echo of those awful words reverberating off her lips. "I have to go," Sunset blurted out as she shot up and quickly bolted out of the coffee shop as fast as she could. She thought she heard the clatter of her plastic cup and its contents spilling out on the ground, but it might as well be in another universe now. She brought up a forearm to her face to wipe the tears away, hoping desperately this time reality would finally reveal itself to be a dream. The harsh world around her refused to abide, persisting through her denial to play back those awful words in her head. Sunset ran across the sidewalk, not even knowing where she was headed. Her heart was beating faster and faster as reality caught up with her. As much as she tried to distract herself, there was no fighting it for long. No matter how hard she ran, there was no getting away from this. Sunset finally slowed to a stop near the glass window of some shop, slipping down onto her knees and gripping her head as she closed her eyes tightly. All the memories of spreading those awful rumors about him online, getting a little girl to lie for her, and it going deeper and deeper into the lie until... Sobs gripped at Sunset's chest as the realization dawned on her. All the hurt she put him through, all the friends she'd made him lose, everything culminating in one last desperate moment. Sunset desperately searched her mind for a solution, some way to fix this so this wouldn't be the case anymore, but nothing would come. Sunset fell over onto the harsh concrete of the wall as her debilitating crying and hyperventilating threatened to make her pass out. The thought of making it all happen attacked her mind and refused to give her peace. Every second the guilt built up and all those years of ruining people's lives gnawed at her deeper than it ever had. The truth rang out in her head like sirens rhythmically blaring their warning of disaster, one that'd already happened, that she pushed someone to suicide.