//------------------------------//
// Stuffy Lies the Head 
// Story: Dueling Keyboards 
// by FanOfMostEverything 
//------------------------------//

Rainbow Dash grinned as she glided to a landing before the Golden Oaks' front door. She wouldn't normally be up so soon after the morning weather shift, but today was a very special occassion. "Yo, Twilight!" she said even as she knocked. "First flight lesson's today! Don't think I'm letting you off the hook just 'cause you managed a spin in a heartsong; everypony knows those don't count!"

The purple figure who answered the door wasn't the one she'd hoped for. Spike looked like he'd had a rough night. Dash hadn't even known dragons could get bags under their eyes. "Sorry, Rainbow. Twilight's not available right now. Like, super not available."

She snorted and tried to peak behind him and up the stairs. "Oh really? And what's her excuse? Too many 'How to be a Princess' books to read?"

He gave her the kind of flat look that needs slit pupils to pull off properly. "She's sick."

"Uh huh. With lazyitis, I bet." Dash spread her wings, ready to go over Spike's head.

"No!" The sudden shout startled her enough to ground her, some undercurrent reminding her that dragons used to eat a lot more than just gems. "Trust me, you do not want to go in there. Twilight's come down with feather flu, hoof blight, cirrus fever, Ahuizotl's revenge—"

Dash held up a hoof once she was able to tell herself the roar hadn't really happened. "Okay, I'm calling horseapples. I haven't even heard of half of those, and I've read every Daring Do book."

Spike sighed and massaged his temples. "Because they're diseases that only affect earth ponies. Twilight's an alicorn now, so she has the properties of all the tribes."

Dash rolled her eyes. "Duh, everypony knows that."

"Including all of the vulnerabilities of the tribes. Most of them are covered by another tribe's strengths, but not when it comes to diseases. Twilight was exposed to things that could never infect her before just by being around other ponies, especially during the coronation, and her immune system's never had to deal with any of it. I've pumped her so full of potions that Zecora cut her off, and she's still going to be bedridden for a week."

"Oh." Dash's ears folded back as she frowned. "That's awful." The frown deepened into a scowl as memory shouldered past sympathy. "Wait, didn't she cancel last week's lesson 'cause she had to get, like, a dozen vaccinations or something?"

"That was for all the really bad diseases. This is most of the stuff they were going to get to in the second round." Spike twiddled his thumbs. "And, well, after she wasn't worried about dying from Pegasopolitan measles, she kind of prioritized those 'How to be a Princess' books."

Dash sighed. "Of course she did."





Rarity put on the bravest smile she could. She knew that she couldn't contract anything afflicting Twilight, but the fluids and smells of a mare who had been beset by far too many illnesses at once were anything but elegant. Rarity set the "get well" basket full of treats and encouraging notes on Twilight's nightstand. "Compliments of all of us, darling. Can I get you anything else?"

Twilight's horn, just about the only part of her that looked even remotely healthy, lit up and worked a quill by her bedside. She passed the note to Rarity, who took it in her own magic and held back the wince at what the illness had down to the normally meticulous hornwriting. "Write to Celestia," she said aloud, wanting to make sure she got it right. "Tell her if she doesn't let me know about any other side effects of becoming an alicorn, I'm going to..." Rarity's jaw dropped as her concentration broke, sending the borderline treasonous note fluttering down to the floor. "Oh, Twilight! Just because the princess may have left out a few messy details about your ascension doesn't mean you should..." Her mouth worked silently for a moment before she shook her head, refusing to voice such crude notions. "I mean, I'm not sure if that's possible!"

Twilight glared. In a voice like sandpaper, harsher and more terrible than anything her dragon would manage for centuries, she growled out, "I'll make it possible."