~ A week later ~
Rainbow trudged up the driveway to Applejack’s front door, her sneakered shoes trailing through the pile of crumbling fall leaves. Red, yellow, bronze; they poked petulantly at her shoes as if to slow her down and distract her from her objectives, but she knew that she would be a coward if she listened to them. And Rainbow Dash was not a coward. Mostly.
She had found herself here every day for a week. Well, that was a lie; ‘found’ would imply that it been an accident, and she had very much come here on purpose, despite having to drag her feet here as they wrestled with her very stubborn brain. Her mind had told her to chill out, to ‘hold her horses’, as AJ would have put it. It had reasoned that AJ didn't want to see her for a while and that she should give her some time.
But Dash had never been very obedient, and apparently her constituent parts weren't either, because her feet had insisted on coming here anyway.
Whenever she rang the doorbell, AJ’s silhouette bobbed up behind the screen door and then went away without opening it. That had hurt. If you were banned from entering the Apple family’s house, you must have done something really wrong. Rainbow kept trying anyway, though.
Perhaps that was for the best. Because today, the silhouette behind the screen was taller, and broader, and far bulkier. It was Big Mac’s.
“What are ya doin’ here?” he growled, stepping outside and crossing his forearms so that every band of muscle was starkly visible.
Dash gulped. She was tall and strong, but Mac could squeeze her to a pulp.
“I'm here to see AJ,” she squeaked out, her throat wobbly, as though a bird had settled in there and was trying to beat its wings around.
“Well, she don't wanna see you.” Big Mac leaned against the doorframe and the whole house shook. “Ah don't know what ya did to her, but Ah don't like it. You better stay out.”
“I didn't do anything!” Rainbow yelped. “Applejack - ” Then she came to her senses. What was she going to say? That Applejack had kissed her? She wasn't going to out AJ to her brother without her consent.
Instead, she dropped her chin to her chest. “I came to make things right,” she said in a low voice. Which was true, in any case. “We had… a thing happened. Alright? I can't say anything else. But I have to fix it.” I have to let her know that she wasn't wrong. That I love her, too.
Mac scowled, his lips tugging at his faint gingery stubble. “That don't sound very honest. Ah don't think yore tellin’ me the full story.”
“It's as honest as I know how to be,” Rainbow whispered, which was also the truth; she was used to hiding everything about her life from everyone else. “Please. Just let me in. I need to see her.”
Something in Mac’s eyes gave way, and his craggy brows uplifted. “Well. Ah don’t wanna be the one standin’ in the way of gettin’ a friendship back… so Ah guess Ah’ll let ya in.” He stood back, but as Rainbow crossed the threshold, he reached out a meaty hand and placed it firmly on her shoulder, his gaze snagged firmly on hers. “But if ya hurt my sister, Miss Dash, let me tell ya: nothin’ an’ no one will be able to save ya from me.”
Then he stepped outside onto the front porch and closed the door behind him.
Rainbow sucked in her breath and teetered into the house, her heels feeling just about as brittle as her heart, as though they might crack and dump her onto the floor at any minute. Winona was curled up in a heap by the fireplace, and she lifted her eyes and wagged her tail but did not bother getting up. It was almost as though she, too, could sense AJ’s current reticence and felt the need to emulate it.
The house was eerily silent; Apple Bloom was with with Sweetie Belle — Rainbow had heard them discussing a sleepover at school — and Granny Smith was either napping somewhere or buying groceries. It was just Rainbow Dash and Applejack, then. The way it always had been when they were kids, but now, somehow, it was much, much scarier.
She clambered ponderously up the steps, debating whether or not she should just turn back, but finally found herself at the top. Steeling herself, she knocked briskly on Applejack’s closed door. Too late to turn back. Plus, if she did, she might see Big Mac waiting there to pummel her into the ground.
“Who is it,” came the weary answer from inside. It wasn't even a question, as though Applejack hadn't had the energy to modulate her voice. “Mac, if that's you, Ah’ll say it again: Ah’m not comin’ out.”
Slight play on words there, but Dash knew this wasn't the moment to point it out. She cleared her throat. “Er, Applejack,” she rasped. “It's… it's Rainbow Dash.”
“What?” Her voice was shot through with alarm. “Dagnabbit! Ah told Mac t’ keep ya out!”
That hurt, but Rainbow forced herself to keep going. “No, AJ! I had to see you! I…” She slumped against the door, pressing the flat of her palm to it, the wood seeming to fog under her breath. “I have to talk to you. About what happened.”
“Well, Ah don’ wanna talk about it.” Applejack’s voice broke on the last syllable, indicating that she very much did want to talk about it. Rainbow had always been able to read AJ like a book. Everyone could. That was just her nature. She hid nothing; she couldn't even if she wanted to. “Why are ya even still here? Why haven't ya… Ah dunno, unfriended me? After what happened? Why do ya still want to see me?”
She could be so obtuse sometimes. Rainbow ground her teeth. “Godamn it, Applejack. Can you please just let me in? Don't you see? Don't you know why I still want to see you?”
Silence.
“You idiot,” Rainbow groaned. “AJ, I'm not mad because you kissed me. If anything, I'm mad because I didn't kiss you first.”
Another silence, and then the door creaked open, as if Applejack had been waiting on the other side of it. Her eyes were streaked with tears, and her hair and clothes were as crumpled as though she hadn't looked in a mirror for days. “What did ya say?” she whispered, not quite staring Rainbow in the eye, as though if she did she would find something scary in her friend’s gaze.
“I said — ” Dash really did try to remember, but she couldn't seem to think anymore, now that she was seeing Applejack again for the first time in a week. Her heart began to beat as if it were playing jump rope, and Rainbow had to firmly step on the rope in order to trip it. “I said… oh, for the love of Pete! This is what I said.” She crossed the threshold, grabbed AJ’s face between her palms, and bent down to kiss her, not taking care to do it slowly or meekly. Their knees knocked together and Rainbow knew her front was sweaty from walking all the way here, but she didn't care. It was perfect.
For a glorious moment, AJ kissed back, her mouth moving hungrily over Rainbow’s — but then frantically pulled away. “No, Dash… we can't do this! Why do ya think Ah ran away in a panic the first time?” She sat down on her bed and buried her head in her hands. Tears trickled out from the gaps between her fingers. “My family won't like this. How can Ah keep goin’, knowin’ they wouldn't want this? They'd be so disappointed…”
Rainbow kneeled and seized her hand, her gaze so intense that AJ felt it as much as she saw it. “Who cares what they want? AJ, you're too nice all the time! Stop worrying about other people. What do you want? Or if you are gonna worry about other people, then why not worry about me? Because I want you. I love you, Applejack.” She paused and then added, “And I have for ages. So tell me, Applejack. What do you want?”
Applejack hesitated for the briefest of moments. Then she said, simply, honestly, in the manner that she was famous for, “Ah want to kiss ya again.”
Rainbow’s whole body unclenched with relief. “Then just do it already,” she murmured, but scarcely had she finished when AJ’s lips were on hers once more.
Still sitting on the bed, the cowgirl ran her hands over Rainbow’s forehead, her cheeks, her neck. Elated, Rainbow picked her up and swung her around, her eyes still shut in rapture.
Finally, when Dash’s noodle-arms were burning from the strain of holding AJ - who, despite her diminutive stature, was nonetheless compact and heavy - she set her down on the dresser, keeping her hands pressed into the small of her back. Their foreheads pressed together, and AJ’s breath was hot on her nose, but Dash kept her eyes closed. She didn't want to open them only for Applejack to disappear, and discover that all of this was a dream.
“How long?” she whispered. “How long have you loved me?” Because that sort of kiss wasn't the kiss that you gave to a mere crush. It had been intense, burning, passionate; the sort of kiss that said you had found your soulmate and weren't going to let them go. “I've been madly in love with you since freshmen year. Can you believe that? All this time and I was too chicken to say anything… Rainbow Dash, the daredevil, the cockiest kid in town…” She snorted.
“Ah wouldn't beat yoreself up about it,” AJ whispered back. Her accent sounded that much more musical now that her voice was washing right over Rainbow’s face, close enough that you could feel the warmth in it. “Ah’ve liked ya for wayyy longer than that.”
“How long are we talking?” Rainbow murmured, scooping AJ into her arms and settling her on the bed so that they could lie down next to each other.
AJ sucked in a playful breath, her eyes crinkling as she fiddled with the edge of Rainbow’s shirt, smoothing out the wrinkles in it. “Oh, Ah dunno. Eight or nine years? Give or take a little?”
Rainbow’s jaw wrenched open in shock. “Holy shit. Really?”
Now the farmgirl seemed bashful, a blush highlighting her freckles, either because of the swear word or the information she had just shared. “Yep. Been a while, huh?”
“Geez.” Rainbow scrawled a hand through her polychromatic hair, staring up at the ceiling. “How did you deal with it for that long? I was already going crazy, and I'd only known I liked you for half that time.”
Applejack shrugged. “Good at keepin’ my feelin’s a secret. All Apples are. It's a family trait. Yeah, Ah thought Ah might go crazy, too. But Ah knew it'd be even worse if Ah told ya an’ ya freaked out, so that was good enough motivation t’ keep my trap shut. At least, it was until last week. Ah dunno what happened… Ah just had t’ kiss ya.” She cringed at the embarrassing memory.
Dash grabbed her hand. “And I'm glad you did,” she promised her warmly. “But I’m not sure how you didn't know I was flirting with you! Like, even though I was terrified to actually tell you, I was still flirting. And I've never been… y’know, discreet. About anything. Seriously.”
AJ gave a rueful smile. “Obvliviousness is another Apple family trait.”
They held hands for a while, lying on Applejack’s bed as though they had all the time in the world. Finally, Rainbow Dash rolled over to face Applejack, propping her elbow up to support herself. “So. Who all do we tell?”
AJ sighed and passed a weary hand against her face, slumping her shoulders against her pillow. “Ah wish Ah could tell mah family… but Ah can't, Dash, Ah just can't. Ya understand, don’t’cha?”
Applejack knew Rainbow well enough to know that Dash would want to scream this good news out to the world, hence the apologetic look in her eyes as she asked Dash to keep it a secret from her family for a while longer. Rainbow, however, was not as put out as AJ would have thought, even if she was a little disappointed. She knew that AJ needed a home and a family who loved her, and, disgusting and unfortunate as it was, she might not have that if she told them that she was dating Rainbow. Dash wanted to share the good news with them, too, but she could forego that if it meant keeping Applejack safe. “Of course I understand,” she promised. “People have dated in secret for centuries. No biggie. We’ll be like Romeo and Juliet.”
“Well, now ya jinxed it,” AJ said drily. “We’re both gonna die gruesome deaths.”
“Since when do you even read Shakespeare plays?” Rainbow demanded.
“Since Ah had t’ take tenth grade English - the same class where you started readin’ ‘em. Pay attention.” Applejack chucked Dash lightly under the chin, but she was grinning broadly, and it was evident that they had both equally missed this playful banter.
“So who else are we telling?” Dash asked. “Our friends, obviously. I mean, I already kind of talked to Fluttershy about my feelings…”
“An’ Ah already talked t’ Rares,” Applejack admitted sheepishly. “So Ah bet the two of ‘em figured we'd eventually get together anyway. That means the only two left are Twilight ‘n Pinkie. Wouldn't be surprised if Pinkie already knew. Ya know how she is.” They shared a chuckle. “As for Twilight, there's no way she knows anythin’. Girl wouldn't know romance if it kissed her on the lips, ya know?”
“Yep. And I'm pretty sure Sunset Shimmer’s tried to a couple times,” Rainbow chortled. “Anyway. It's settled then. We can tell everyone at school.”
“Great. What about yore aunt an’ uncle? They wouldn't care, would they?”
A wave of unease wiggled into Rainbow’s stomach. She still hadn't told Applejack about the whole situation. Maybe now was the time. She took AJ’s hand, fingering her callused knuckles. “AJ… about my aunt and uncle. I have to tell you something.” But when she tried, the words wouldn't come. They were stoppered up in her throat, burning into it like acid, but they still wouldn't budge. She gulped. “I - maybe I should just show you.”
Confused, Applejack let Rainbow lead her outside to the driveway. Their hands swung together, and Rainbow still felt lightheaded with glee, but her stomach simultaneously churned with nerves. She hadn't told anyone her secret before, not even AJ, whom she trusted more than anyone else in the world.
“Where's yore sports car?” Applejack asked. “Didn't ya drive it here?”
Rainbow grimaced. “Not quite. Can I get a ride?”