//------------------------------// // Bk2/Ch2 What Lies Within // Story: Love's Lost Decade // by Priceless911 //------------------------------// Book 2/ Chapter 2 What Lies Within Year 0 Month 04 Day 14 The group of monks continued up the mountain trail as Shangri-La replied, “So… you’re on a quest to cross the entire world to get back to this Zecora?” Zeil nodded, “She deserves to know the truth.” The ibex master and his disciples led the way as he called back, “Are you so sure?... have you considered the thought that she is better off believing what she does?” Zeil shook his head as he replied, “And let her think that I just abandon her for no reason? No. I’d rather she know the truth then to think I would ever leave her like that.” One of the disciples spoke, “And… what if she rejects you for it? What then?” Zeil shook his head, “I'd rather she know the truth and reject me, then to believe I was capable of abandoning her.” Shangri-La replied, “But, if your story is true, then that was months ago…and you have months still before you arrive. Are you sure she will remember you by then?” Zeil nodded, “If she cared for me as much as I care for her… she will never forget.” Shangri-La smiled as he looked up the path, “True love… I’ve heard rumors about it, but I never thought I would ever hear of a changeling actually experiencing it.” Zeil asked, “Didn’t you feel love to become reformed?” Shangri-La shook his head, “What I’ve done is more sharing love then experiencing it… and it isn’t so much as love, but rather friendship or comradery. What you have is love in its purest form. You should have become reformed the moment you kissed her. Or at least a symptom of change.” Zeil thought to himself, “I did have some weird glitter-like thing with my wing. Well before it was cut off… you think that was it?” Shangri-La nodded, “Yes exactly. That’s how it starts, but… why can’t you change at will, it’s strange?” The Ibex master spoke, “could it be that his lack of wings has something to do with it?” Shangri-La thought to himself, “Perhaps… but a lack of thorns shouldn’t keep a rose from its bloom. There must be more to it.” The master replied, “Whatever the reason, Rafi can help. We only need to assist you in contacting him.” Zeil spoke next, “I have a question for Serenity.” The silent mare gave him an annoyed look as he rephrased, “Or… anyone who is willing to answer for her… Why the vow of silence?” The Ibex master smiled, “By silencing one’s self, one tend to listen more to the world around him, and with it, gain a better understanding of the universe around him. This vow for her, is just another step in her training.” Zeil nodded as he understood, “Oh… that makes since. How long does the vow usually last?” The master replied, “It depends on the one taking the vow. Serenity chose it to be indefinite. Or at least till her assentation.” Zeil was confused, “Her assentation?” The Ibex master nodded, “Yes, You see I choose my decuples by their skills, their level of peace and their loyalty. And if I were to ask any of my students which one had the most of these qualities they would say…” The Disciples excluding Serenity all replied, “Serenity.” Serenity nodded in a way that she too agreed as the master continued, “So by this decision, I have chosen that when the day comes that I am to meet my fate. Serenity shall take over the temple as Sensei. She has more than earned her place and I feel that she will continued to do great things for the lost ones who come to us.” Zeil was confused again, “Lost ones?” The master nodded, “Yes, all who come to the temple are lost ones. Some seek a new life, a greater understanding or a place of better acceptance. Once they find what they seek, we give them a choice. To stay and live in peace, to leave by your teachings to better yourself or the world, or to harness your teaching and understand yourself for the better. Although… there are few who disagree with their understanding and chose to do harm with what they learn. You already met one of my former disciples.” Zeil thought to himself before replying, “You mean… that earth pony in the Sullen Ones?” The master shook his head, “No… Charra the dragon. She was my first dragon disciple, but she didn’t like that I chose Serenity as my successor so out of teenage envy, and her dragon blood she challenged Serenity to a dual to the death. But I wouldn’t allow it. Part of our teachings is to only harm in self-defense or protection. So when the two fought, Serenity came out the victor, and spared Charra’s life. Broken and disgraced, Charra left the temple and joined the Sullen Ones. It pains me that one with such talent could resort to harming others for material possessions, but, it is not my place to choose how one should live. Only to accept. Those cuts on your forearm… they are from her are they not?” Zeil looked down at his still bandaged wound as he nodded, “it is… I didn’t expect her to be so fast… it was like fighting a beam of light.” The caravan continued up the mountain pass as they saw a small stream crossing the path ahead. No one paid it any mind as the ibex master smiled, “I doubt she’s as fast as light… but she was one of my most skilled. And despite her choices, she still has a small sense of loyalty. If only I could find a means of reaching it.” As the caravan approached the master and his disciples started crossing over the water’s surface as Zeil replied, “Well, she was definably strong. If Serenity wasn’t there I’d be de-” As Zeil stepped onto the surface of the water, his hoof sank all the way to the knee as the unexpected depth caused him to jump back in surprise, “Whoa! What the!?!” Hearing the unexpected call, the entire caravan stopped as the Ibex master smiled and spoke without looking back, “Ah… so you’ve lost your balance.” Confused Zeil looked to the master as he asked, “What?” The master turned back to his new apprentice and spoke, “Balance… it’s what weighs in all of our abilities. Whether it be peace or magic. One must have balance to master everything.” At first Zeil was confused but when he took a closer look at the stream of water it seemed to make mores sense. Underneath the water’s surface was a countless cluster of bamboo post that were so close to the surface that anyone crossing the stream seemed to walk on the water itself. As he looked at the countless post and the unknown depth beneath them Zeil mumbled, “Oh… it’s another one of these.” Though none of the disciples heard his words, the master did as he replied, “Another one? So you’ve done this lesson before?” Zeil nodded, “yea… Zecora had me cross a river the same way… only the staves were much higher over the water and it was a single row.” The wise Ibex nodded, “I see… then this is a lesson in indecision then.” Zeil looked at the master in confusion, “What? What does that have to do with this?” The master smiled, “try to cross and find out.” Feeling it was a waste of time, Zeil looked at the closest peg but as he stepped out onto it his eyes shifted to the next, then back as he didn’t center his hoof properly. As he applied pressure, his hoof slipped off the peg and into the water as Zeil jumped back and grunted in annoyance. Feeling he did it wrong, Zeil tried again on a different staff, but like before his hoof was misplaced and he slid off and into the water. After failing the second time, the wise master spoke, “You see… too much focus on the choices and not enough on what one needs.” Zeil gave the master a confused look, “What do you mean by that?” The master explain, “Consider this… assume instead of looking at a collection of steps… say they are a collection of marbles on the floor. Now say I told you to take only one. What would you do?” Zeil replied, “Well, I'd choose the best one.” The Ibex nodded, “and what is the best one?... the best in merely a matter of opinion. Say each marble is a different size, shape, color, and texture. Why, you could be sitting for hours trying to determine which is best. Life is precious, time lost can never be returned, so why waste it on something that you would take with you, and never use for any real necessity? That marble is only going to go into your possessions and collect dust correct? So why take the time to choose?” Zeil tried to figure out the answer, “so… should I just refuse to choose?” The master shook his head, “that too is unwise. By refusing to accept a gift, you are merely passing yourself off as ungrateful or disrespectful. By doing so you could incite distrust or anger with those close to you. Better neutral then an enemy.” Zeil asked, “So… what do I do?” The ibex trotted through his disciples until he approached the stream then reached out and firmly planted his hoof on one of the pegs as he replied, “Don’t choose… just step out. By speaking to Rafi, you have already attained your balance at least once before… but even one with balance must know to make decisions quickly. Even if the decision has no real difference in the future, it serves a purpose or overall goal. So… cross the stream, but without focus on your decision.” Though his statement didn’t make much sense to him, it still seems like a solid logic so giving a bracing sigh, Zeil stepped out onto the closest peg to him. With his first hoof now planted, Zeil started to remember his lesson with Zecora in balance. Though the lesson was months ago, her words still stayed with him as he mumbled, “Balance in body, brings balance in mind… a calming thought true balance can be gained, and your journey across will be easily attained. With this, Zeil closed his eyes to focus, and as he did, he saw something familiar. He could see the line of staves across the rushing stream in the Everfree forest, and at its end, Zecora as she stood there giving him a smile of confidence as she did those few months ago. Smiling at the familiar sight, Zeil looked down and started to see the line of staves slowly drift apart from their strait order, but still close enough to step onto each and still make it across. So with the path laid out, Zeil stepped forward onto each staff as he continued his path to the other side of the gap. As Zeil reached the other side, he reopened his eyes as he saw all the master’s disciples looking at him with surprised smiles. As he smiled back, Shangri-La spoke, “that was… impressive…” With a confused expression, the Temple master asked, “What happened?... did he make it? Blind billy in suspense here.” The hippogriff disciple replied, “He crossed with perfect balance…” Feeling like it was exaggerated a little, Zeil replied, “Well, I don’t know about that… I just cleared my mind and gained my balance. Did it once before and will probably do it again later.” Shangri-La replied, “You crossed a stream of balance with your eyes closed before?” Not catching it, Zeil replied, “I did?” He looked back across the stream that is now behind him “I… guess I didn’t realize.” The Ibex replied, “If this is true… then you have exceptional peace and balance… so… what is it that keeps your spiritual guide from assisting you?” Zeil replied, “That’s what you’re supposed to help me with, isn’t it?” The Wise ibex smiled, “Ah… that’s right. Then let us continue. With luck, we will have our answer soon.” With that said, the ibex master trotted passed his disciples as he once again lead the group towards their destination. Later the convoy of monk arrived at a large cave that seemed to dig into the mountain’s side as the ibex spoke, “We have arrived… Serenity?” Nodding to her instruction, Serenity stepped to the front of the herd as she picked up a pebble, placed it under her wing to hold it, and started trotting forward. With the pebble under her wing, Serenity lead the way as the herd of monks followed the silent mare into the dark cave. As they traveled deeper into the earth, it wasn’t long before they reached a large open cavern that held a small pedestal in the center of the chamber with a large bowl like cavity dug into the center filled with water. As Zeil entered the chamber he looked passed the alter towards the three tunnels that exited the cavern as he started to ask, “Okay… which way sh-” Shangri-La interrupted as he whispered, “Shh… listen quietly, our path will be chosen for us.” Zeil replied quietly, “chosen?... ho-“ “Shhh…” Being shushed by the master this time, Zeil silenced himself as Serenity took the pebble from under her wing and approached the alter in the center of the room. As she approached, she looked back at Zeil then gestured to have him approach. Knowing what she was saying Zeil approached the silent mare as she held out her hoof to him and nodded to it. Confused Zeil asked, “What?...” Serenity raised and lowered her hoof in a way to tell him to give her his hoof. Barely understanding the silent mare, Zeil held out his hoof as she took it, placed the pebble in it then guided it over the small pillar of water. When his hoof was over the water, Serenity placed her other hoof over her mouth in a manner to shush him as he nodded in understanding. After nodding in response she held his hoof with the pebble over the center of the water as she turned his hoof over and allowed the small stone to drop into the water with a small splash. As soon as the echo of the splash subsided, the cavern became deftly silent as the herd of monks sat silently waiting. Confused, Zeil looked around but stayed quiet as he tried to understand what they were waiting for. However after a few more seconds of silence a loud drop was heard echoing from one of the three tunnels as ibex master smiled, “There… that is the pool chosen… Come students let us find this lost one’s peace.” With that, the old goat started trotting through the tunnel towards their chosen path as Shangri-La approached Zeil and explained, “In this cave there are three sacred pools where the most skilled masters gain their inner peace. When one come to seek peace, they must drop a stone into the alter and have a pool chosen for them. If you are ready, a pool will react with a sound, but if you aren’t, nothing will be heard and you must return at a later time.” Zeil followed the group as he asked, “So… I’m ready? For what?” The Ibex master replied as he led the path, “for further enlightenment. You obviously have balance and it supposedly matches with your peace, however… if Rafi won’t speak with you, then you don’t seem to be entirely at peace. So… we must strive to find what’s causing this.” As they continued, it wasn’t long till the group made it to the end of the cavern as they entered a large chamber with a pool of mirror-like water sitting in the center of the chamber. As they approached the pool, Shangri-La started lighting a small number of torches around the room as The Ibex spoke, “Alright students, the time has come to assist our new friend. Take your places around the pool and begin meditating.” He looked towards Zeil, “As for our changeling guest, you must take your place on the stone in the center of the water.” Zeil nodded, “alright. I guess I can do that.” As Zeil started trotting towards the edge of the water, the Ibex master continued, “Oh and be mindful of the water, it’s a littl-” All of a sudden there was a loud splash as Zeil’s first step into the seemingly shallow water was so deep that it completely submerged his entire body as the unsuspected changeling fell in and vanished below the surface. Smiling at what happened, the ibex master finished, “Deep.” At that moment Zeil surfaced on the water as he spoke, “What the? How deep is this water? It’s just a strait drop-off!” The ibex nodded, “It is, with the only shallows being the pedestal in the center which is about an inch deep…as for the rest, even I do not know how deep the water reaches.” Swimming to the center pedestal Zeil replied, “Really… well a better warning would have been nice.” The ibex smiled, “I said it was a little deep.” Rolling his eyes Zeil climbed onto the only shallow part of the entire pool as he climbed up onto a small circle platform in the center of wide pool of water. As he sat down on the center of the submerged pedestal, Zeil asked, “Okay so now what?” The Ibex spoke, “Begin meditating, we will assist you shortly.” Zeil nodded as he crossed his hind legs, closed his eyes, and started his meditation. As Zeil meditated, the Ibex master looked to his disciples, “Students in position.” With that instruction all eight disciples with their Ibex master circled around the edges of the pool and sat down making a perfect circle as Shangri-La sat at the edge of the chamber and waited for further instructions. While Zeil slipped into his meditative state he found something strange about the cave he was in. Usually when meditating, Zeil was able to see himself and his surroundings in more depth, but for some reason, in here, he was completely blind. Himself, the monks, the cave around him, even the water beneath him were completely invisible to him. It was as if he were just plainly sitting with his eyes closed, and not making an attempt to focus at all. As he sat he started to see something finally appear to him, it was a small droplet on the ceiling that was slowly running down a stalactite on the roof of the cave. As Zeil’s focus centered on the droplet, the disciples in the room who were meditating with him, slowly raised their hoofs, talons, arms, and paw out as they held their appendage over the water’s edge and waited. Then just as the droplet fell from the top of the cave, the circle of disciples waited until the exact moment the droplet fell into the pool of water as each disciple in perfect synchronization dipped their appendage into the water just as the droplet hit. All of a sudden as if a bright light was just turned on, Zeil’s mind was filled with not only the appearance of the room, but a cascade of clarity that he had never had in any meditation session prior to now. Every aspect of his surrounding, not only their appearance and movements, but also their colors and anticipaded paths became so clear to him it was as if he had gained an ability to predict every movement that was even possible. It was as if his mind was overfilled and almost over whelmed by the spirituality of this very room. The only thing that still seemed unclear to him, was the exact depth of the pool he was sitting in, even when he made the effort to see its bottom, all he could see was a deep and seemingly endless abyss. As he marveled at everything else that was crystal clear to him, his vision was extinguished as everything around him faded before vanishing entirely. Confused, Zeil found himself having some sort of vision as he found himself standing in a vast field of grass. Looking around in confusion Zeil slowly started to recognize the field as he looked into the distance and could see Canterlot on the horizon. Smiling at the sight, Zeil looked around, “Rafi? Are you here? Rafi!” As Zeil looked around it wasn’t long till he saw a vision of Chief Rafi standing on a hill in the distance. As he saw the vision Zeil started running towards him as he smiled, “There, it’s about time. RAFI!” As he rushed towards the guiding zebra, Zeil felt confused when the ground beneath the grass started sinking into marsh as each step towards his guiding spirit became harder and harder to trot through. At first he thought it was the mud beneath the watery grass that was starting to slow his speed, but then he found that it wasn’t mud at all, the water was becoming thicker and darker as the brown muddy water changed almost entirely to a black glue-like liquid. Before he knew it, Zeil’s hooves started to sink into the liquid until it made it impossible for him to take even a single step. As he jerked his hooves to try and move he mumbled, “What… what is this.” He looked at his vision, “Rafi! What’s happening?” Chief Rafi didn’t answer, instead he only turned towards Zeil before dissolving into ash as a voice replied, “He won’t help you… he never wanted to help you. That’s why he helped the ponies banish you. Why you’re as far from Equestria as you can possibly be.” Confused Zeil looked around as he asked, “What? Who said that?” The voice continued, “Face it… Rafi betrayed you… he had no intention of letting you and Zecora live happily-ever-after. If anything he shares the opinion of changelings with the rest of the world. Why else would he only give you the option you had?” Chief Rafi’s words echoed in his mind, “You will have to choose, whether they see you as what you are… or who you are.” After the familiar phrase was heard, the dark voice continued, “You think this was a choice to build the ponies opinion? No… Rafi knew that when given this option you would have no choice but to follow its path. He knew that no matter what your choice, you and Zecora would never be. Save the guard and be banished with no hope of returning to her. Or, let the guard fall, and prove to Equestria that changelings are merely what they say they are… a heartless race who only care about themselves.” Zeil replied, “You’re wrong! Chief Rafi knew that if I chose to save the guard, I could sway their opinions of changelings and give me a chance to be with Zecora.” All of a sudden the black liquid on the ground continued holding Zeil in place as some materialized into a dark changeling as it stood in front of him and spoke, “Are you so sure?... if he wanted to truly help, he would have warned you of the portal itself. He would have told you clearly what would happen so you could avoid it entirely. So why didn’t he?... because he had no intention of helping you. He knew you would get banished and he knew that you couldn’t make it back from the furthest corner of the globe. Face it… he wanted you to fail. And if you want proof of this guilt, then why does he hide his face while you continuously try to contact him? Why won’t he show himself to you?” Although the dark changeling’s claim sounded convincing, Zeil still shook his head, “You’re wrong… Rafi is my spiritual guide. He helped me a number of times before and I know that if he could, he would help me again. I trust Rafi with my life. And I will always trust him, no matter what.” The dark changeling sighed as he replied, “Then… you are fool. And no fool is worthy to host my power.” With the final words spoke, the dark changeling stood his ground as Zeil looked down at his trapped hooves to see that the dark liquid was now running up his legs as the light grey on his zebra form coat was slowly consumed by the jet black of the dark liquid. Jerking his body to try and free himself, Zeil struggled as much as he could as the liquid finished covering his legs and slowly progressed over his torso. Back in the cave, the vision Zeil saw wasn’t shared with any of the meditating monks, however Shangri-La who was observing the ceremony could see Zeil’s distressed expression and struggling gestures as he stood up and called, “SENSEI!!!” Awaking from their joined meditation, The Ibex master along with his disciples stood from their places as they looked to Zeil who was reacting to his vision with jerked movements. Hearing the commotion, The Ibex master spoke, “What is happening? What do you see?” The hippogriff spoke in horror, “He’s… he’s under attack! Can… Can a spiritual guide do such a thing? Can he harm someone like this?” The Master shook his head, “No… it’s not Rafi… it’s something else.” With the attack continuing, Shangri-La spoke, “Whatever it is its killing him! We need to do something!” The master spoke, “We have to wake him… Serenity!” Nodding to the order, Serenity griped her staff as she jumped and flew high into the air, then dove towards Zeil at full speed. Approaching from the front, Serenity tackled Zeil as she hooked the shaft of her staff under his chin and dove into the water using her weapon to hold push Zeil deeper and deeper into the water so that his vision could ended by force. In his vision, the black liquid had already reached his neck as Zeil looked to the dark changeling as he spoke one last time, “stop this pointless journey… if you don’t, you’re likely to kill us both.” With that the vision started to fade, as Zeil’s consciousness faded with it. Later, Zeil awoke back at the temple in the same room he was in before as Shangri-La sat in the corner as he looked up and spoke, “Welcome back… how are you feeling?” Zeil rubbed his head as he replied, “Like I’ve gone three rounds with a titan. What happened to me?” The changeling monk sighed, “Sensei is currently meditating to figure that out. We don’t know what it was… but something inside you is blocking your connection with Rafi. And to make it worse… it attacked you… I wish I only knew why.” Zeil looked down as he thought to himself, “He said… that Rafi is untrustworthy. That he betrayed me and wanted me casted out of Equestria. And if I continued trying to get back, I would kill us both.” Shangri-La was confused, “Us?” Zeil nodded, “yea… whatever that was, it talked as if we were one and the same.” Shangri-La asked, “So…was he like a second personality or something?” Zeil shook his head, “I don’t think so… because… he had an aura, something… other than changeling.” Shangri-La was confused, “An aura? You mean he was his own species? Then what was he?” Zeil shook his head, “I… I don’t know… it felt like looking at a creature from darkness. Like a cross between some sort of beast, like… a manticore… and something intelligent like… a unicorn… or a…” Shangri-La finished, “A zebra?” Zeil nodded, “exactly… you think… it’s something to do with Rafi? It can’t be a coincidence.” “It is… well sort of.” At that moment The Ibex master and Serenity entered the room as Shangri-La replied to his master’s words, “Sensei? Did your guide tell you that? What did she say?” The Ibex sighed, “Sadly, she informed me that this creature that dwells within Zeil is… a part of him. Something that is in accordance with his… fate.” Zeil was concerned, “Fate? What do you mean? What is it?” The master shook his head, “A sort of spirit that dwells within a chosen few. However it wasn’t supposed to awaken until a time when you had the power to contain him.” Zeil was confused, “So… I’ve always had this… thing in me? And it just now woke up?” The Ibex master shook his head, “No… it has been awake for a while now. The last time you spoke to Rafi was the day it woke. Since then, it’s been blocking your connection with your spirit.” Zeil was still concerned, “But… how? How can it prevent me from seeing Rafi?” The ibex master started pacing, “For one to see his spiritual guide takes a number of things. First, a keen understanding and possession of perfect balance. Second, a sense of peace in either mind body or soul. And finally, trust. For one to see his spirit and gain his wisdom one must first have complete trust in his spirit. This… thing inside you shares your being. And for some reason, it has no trust in Rafi.” Zeil sighed in irritation, “So… that’s why Rafi hasn’t spoken to me in months. When I was banished from Equestria, this thing must have woken then and now it won’t let me see him.” The old goat stopped pacing as he replied, “Exactly, and with his distrust, you cannot see Chief Rafi.” Zeil gave him a concerned look, “So… how do I convince it to trust him?” The Ibex shook his head, “You don’t… as I said before, it was supposed to awaken after you gained the power to suppress it. Meaning it woke too early and for us to overcome it, you must begin training.” Zeil didn’t like where this was heading, “Training?... what kind of training?” The master replied, “Spiritual… we will need to teach you more potent forms of balance, peace, and tranquility.” Zeil gave him a dull look, “Okay… how long is this supposed to last… I can’t wait around here forever you know.” The master smiled, “Now, now, it shouldn’t be more than a few days at best. You already have a sense of balance and peace, so we only need to hone them more. Then the next time you meditate to speak with Rafi, your balance will outweigh the thing inside you and you will be able to see him. Once that happens, you will become reformed and you will be free to leave, just as fate has planned.” Zeil gave him a suspicious look, “So… basically my goal is to speak with Rafi then I can leave?” The Ibex nodded, “Yes… I don’t know what he must tell you, but in order for my task to be complete, you must gain a reconnection with your guide before continuing on your journey.” Zeil sighed in disappointment as he replied, “Well… I do need to speak with him… so I guess I have no choice.” The Ibex smiled, “then it’s settled, tomorrow you will train under myself and Serenity. That way you will get the best this temple has to offer. And once you’re finished, this creature within you can be suppressed at least until after you speak with Rafi.” Zeil thought to himself, “So… what do I do to get rid of it altogether? Suppressing it is fine, but how do I remove it?” The Ibex master shook his head as he turned to leave the room, “You don’t… whatever this is… it’s now a part of you. Something that can’t be removed. For now, all we must do is suppress his influence upon you, for some day in the future, you will need him, just as he needs you. Till then… we must make sure you’re ready.” As the Ibex left the room, Shangri-La spoke, “you will need him?... what’s that mean?” Zeil shook his head as he replied with an uneasy tone, “I don’t know… but something the creature said still worries me… he mentioned that I’m not worthy of his power.” “So… what the Sensei said, is that power what he meant? Will he give it to you someday?” Zeil shook his head as he replied, “I think the bigger question is… do I even want power, from something that… dark?...”