Seizing the tiny white rabbit far more roughly than was necessary, Sunset Shimmer gave Angel Bunny a filthy look as she bit out the words, “Is trying to catch a bit of sleep after having come through the mirror portal really so much to ask for? Is it?” Now, more than ever, one couldn’t help but get the impression that her fiery red and yellow mane was a literal conflagration about to blow out of control. Her icy blue eyes were laden with the promise of an altogether different sort of burn if crossed. It didn’t help that these transdimensional journeys played merry havoc with her circadian rhythms, often leaving her springing between adrenaline-fuelled activity and totally bereft within the space of minutes.
She’d been hoping – or to put it more accurately, Fluttershy had been the one doing the hoping – that with time and proximity would come some sort of an understanding between the two; Sunset was more than willing to play ball and befriend the cantankerous rabbit, but unfortunately Angel was rather more resistant to the idea of welcoming somepony else into Fluttershy’s cottage. Harrowing memories of Discord’s hammock suspended above a lake of chocolate in the living room coursed through him, and though Sunset was not capable of such feats, it didn’t mean that her presence was made any more tolerable to him. No matter how accommodating she tried to be, Sunset frequently found herself being pelted with carrot shards at the dinner table, kicked in the shins in the halls, or having her tail gnawed on when she was trying to relax.
“I should get Twilight to set the mirror portal on random and toss you into it,” Sunset said, narrowing her tired eyes at Angel who didn’t even so much as bat an eyelid. She really didn’t have either the patience or the energy for this feuding and she suppressed a yawn, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of seeing her vulnerable or weak. Still, though, the thought of unilaterally kicking the rabbit on to some distant world full of apex predators brought a momentary fleeting smile to her muzzle even though she knew she’d never actually go through with it. Fluttershy would return home soon and Angel would go back to being her problem. Sunset Shimmer, for her part, was happy to earn a few extra Good Girlfriend points by not sending him tumbling into some nameless, echoing void for all eternity.
Girlfriend? Marefriend? I can never keep these things straight in my mind. Someone needs to compile a Human-Pony dictionary one of these days.
All of a sudden realising that she was still holding the petulant rabbit, who was continuing to lash out fruitlessly at her with his tiny limbs, Sunset released him back on to the floor and he shot her a venomous look as he stormed off somewhere deeper inside the cottage, no doubt in preparation to pour on the waterworks when Fluttershy got home. Sunset shook her head quizzically, wondering why somepony who had the power to tame the wildest beasts in Equestria put up with this much attitude from him. She had her reasons, she supposed, but she was darned if she knew what they were. With a soft sigh, Sunset slumped back down on the couch and closed her eyes. Without Angel around, the cottage was so peaceful. The colours, the décor, it was all designed with the sole purpose of drawing one into a state of relaxation. It was sombre, subdued, without ever feeling bland or empty.
Despite Fluttershy’s wish that Sunset try to get along better with Angel, she didn’t go out of her way to make it a habit to be at the cottage when she wasn’t there; Fluttershy, she knew, had a pretty busy life, what with zapping monsters with rainbow lasers, rescuing hurt and lost animals, and dealing with the various dramas of her own and those of her friends. Sunset, too, could only drop by sporadically when there was a lull in the activity at Canterlot High, and she liked to spend that time visiting old friends and family, and some of her favourite haunts from the past. Sooner or later, a decision was going to have to be made there, but for now she was happy enough putting it off and seeing where things went. Fluttershy was her first serious relationship – all her previous ones had simply been about acquiring popularity and status for herself, first at the School for Gifted Unicorns, thenback at CHS, and she shuddered inwardly at the memory of what she used to be like – and she didn’t want to mess it up by moving things along too fast.
As uncomfortable reminders of her past went, one of them was there to greet her whenever she returned home to Canterlot; through Twilight’s efforts at mediation, she was just about on cordial terms with Celestia now after what had happened upon her initial departure to the human world, but it was clear that the relationship between her and her one-time mentor would never be what it was. Princess Celestia had almost been like a second mother to Sunset at one point, something that Twilight had often said as well. Now though, like her friends and family, they seemed to be nothing more than genial strangers who uttered polite greetings whenever they passed each other in hallways. Sunset tossed and turned on the couch, well aware of the fact that sleep was unlikely to be forthcoming with her mind racing like this, but not quite ready to admit defeat just yet. Thanks to her experiences in the human world, she’d achieved her ambitions – and more besides – but despite that, despite her relationship with Fluttershy, she still felt a gnawing sense of unease in her soul.
Part of her had felt the call of the abyss, tempted to do what she’d threatened to do to Angel Bunny earlier: throw herself randomly into the mirror portal. There were an infinite number of worlds out there where she could start over, free of both her past and any obligations to the future. Not that she would ever do such a thing, of course. She cared too much about her friends in both worlds to just abandon them like that, but there were days when the idea of a truly blank slate seemed far more appealing to her far more than it should have. Sunset grimaced and wondered if it was some kind of mirror-lag that was making her so maudlin.
“They made me do it, I swear!” Sunset Shimmer sat bolt upright, drenched in sweat, legs trapped in the blanket, horn ignited in a reflex action as she was startled into wakefulness from some terrifying nightmare or other by the front door nearly being torn off its hinges by somepony rudely barging their way through it. There’s no way in Equestria that was Fluttershy! No matter how angry or frustrated she is, she can never, ever bring herself to abuse the furniture. It took her still-dozing brain a moment or two to register what that then implied: there was an intruder in Fluttershy’s cottage and she ought to do something about it!
Disentangling herself from the sweat-stained blankets and pillows, Sunset Shimmer stood upright – savouring the satisfying crack that issued from her spine as she adjusted it – and prepared to confront who- or whatever it was that had broken in. Crime, in the mundane sense of robberies and assaults, was near-unheard of in Equestria, especially somewhere idyllic like Ponyville, but there were still one or two small incidents per year.
Tense, yet also oddly excited by the prospect of seeing some action, she carefully entered the hallway, horn lit and ready to deploy the offensive spells she’d learned in school so long ago, and found a figure lurking in the shadowy, half-lit space. None of the lamps were illuminated either. Was it already that late? I must’ve nodded off for longer than I’d thought. The figure appeared to be trembling, and its outline had a certain Fluttershy-esque quality about it, but there was also something strangely off about it. It had way more right angles and sharp edges than the curves and round bits one usually associated Fluttershy with.
Angel Bunny leapt out in front of Sunset and approached the hazily-defined presence, though she wasn’t sure whether it was to attack or because he thought it was Fluttershy; he had scampered across roughly half the distance to it when he suddenly reared up in alarm and darted back, a blur of white, rather sweetly taking refuge behind one of Sunset’s forelegs. “Oh, so we’re besties now that you need me to protect you from a big, scary monster? Typical.” She missed the sardonic look Angel gave her. Adding more power to her horn, simply to provide some light, Sunset revealed a mass of pink and yellow quivering in the doorway. “Fluttershy, is that you?” she asked gently.
When she had time to think about it later, Sunset realised that she’d never seen Fluttershy anything other than well-kempt; it helped that she had an easy, natural beauty that one not in the know might assume had come from the same place as Rarity’s – i.e. at the end of a long make-up counter – but she’d never needed any help in being attractive. She simply was. Her big innocent eyes, the delicate curve of her muzzle, her long trailing mane, her clear and shiny coat, and long, slender limbs all contributed to her beauty. The sweet, virtuous personality helped, too, of course.
None of these things were in evidence at the moment.
Her mane had become a tangled mess of sharply jutting peaks and wild furrows that would likely have given even Rarity a conniption fit if she’d been asked to try and do something with it. Her bright blue eyes had taken on a reddish hue and they appeared to be lit with an internal glow lending her a most striking gaze. Sunset also noticed that her feather-soft wings had picked up some sharp edges of their own and had taken on an almost leathery texture like those of a bat. Last but not least, there were the ears sporting some extra points and the pearly white lateral incisors peaking out over her muzzle.
What could’ve made for quite the intimidating presence – a fearsome hybrid of bat and pony features – was rendered rather harmless by the fact that it was still, well, Fluttershy. And she wasn’t snarling or writhing, but sobbing, still shaking in the hallway while all Sunset Shimmer could do was gawk in mute incomprehension at her. Getting her brain into gear, Sunset cautiously approached her so as not to startle the anxious Fluttershy into a fight-or-flight response. “Fluttershy, what happened?” she asked gently, stretching out what she hoped would be a comforting hoof.
Fluttershy’s cry stopped momentarily. “I’m a monster,” she replied as if it were obvious, unable to meet Sunset’s gaze. Her voice sounded different, too. It was mostly her own, but it had a distinctive sultry rasping tone underlying it.
“No, you’re not.” She touched Fluttershy’s back gently; she recoiled, but Sunset maintained the contact, stroking her withers softly. Of course, the fruit bat incident. She recalled how Fluttershy had told her the story as one of the many, many odd incidents from her life since meeting Twilight Sparkle and becoming an Element of Harmony. Some time ago, Princess Twilight and Applejack had come up with a scheme to rid Sweet Apple Acres of a fruit bat infestation that had involved utilising Fluttershy’s famous Stare: an ability to render most creatures temporarily passive. Twilight had accidentally transferred some of the bat-essence into Fluttershy, turning her into a rampaging, apple-obsessed bat-pony until she’d managed to cure it. Evidently, the cure hadn’t been totally successful. Sunset cast an appraising eye over Fluttershy and noticed that she was covered in numerous scratches of various sizes and depth, though she was both alarmed and relieved to note that they were healing at a phenomenal rate. “What happened to you?” asked Sunset tenderly, gesturing at the injuries.
“I was just finishing up with the feeding of a litter of manticore cubs that were newly-born in the Everfree Forest when I, er, transformed into this,” she said, wiping at her damp nose with a hoof. “Some of the animals there, even the ones who’d normally go out of their way to ignore a pony, must’ve … taken exception to my new form. They saw me as-” she had to stop as a lump had formed in her throat and she swallowed painfully before continuing “-some kind of hideous beast that was a threat to them. And they’re not wrong, are they?” She looked into Sunset Shimmer’s eyes, her own blazing red and inquisitive. “Because it was dark, I was able to sneak back home without anypony seeing me. Thankfully.”
Celestia only knew what would have happened had otherwise been the case; anypony unfamiliar with the events at Sweet Apple Acres that night probably would have seen her simply as some kind of bat-monster, and … Sunset Shimmer terminated that line of thinking immediately. The rash acts of heedless, instinct-driven animals were one thing, but ponies ought to have known better. The thought of anypony attacking her dear, sweet Fluttershy over something that she couldn’t control filled her with a cold dread. Taking a deep breath, Sunset wrapped her forelegs around Fluttershy’s neck softly and pulled her into a gentle embrace. Fluttershy’s heart was still racing, but her breathing – and crying – had at least slowed down somewhat. “Look, we both know that you aren’t a monster. The furthest thing from it, in fact. What you are is a victim of a spell gone wrong.” With a wry smile, she added, “It happens to the best of us.”
Fluttershy felt her muzzle twitch involuntarily.
“Was that a smile?”
“No.”
Okay, so truth be told turning into an ego-driven maniacal princess had been of her own choice, but it was still an example of how magic – even when its original purpose was intended to be benevolent in nature – could go wrong when not used properly or by the wrong pony. Sunset knew that she had been a true monster, in thought and deed, and she was still working off the karmic debt she’d incurred even now. Fluttershy was entirely blameless in this. In fact, if Sunset was remembering the story properly, Twilight and Applejack had persisted with the plan despite Fluttershy’s objections to it. She said as much to her, but she wasn’t sure if Fluttershy was even listening to her any more.
Fluttershy, much as she wanted to, still hadn’t given herself up to Sunset’s embrace, but she wasn’t trying to break free of it either. Sitting rigidly, her expression was solemn; she wished she could be on the other side of Equestria, or even beyond its borders entirely, to get away from this curse. It wasn’t so bad now, she knew, but it would only get worse as the days progressed. She would start going out in the late evenings to feast on apples and other fruits, unaware that she even doing it. That all-consuming animal lust would be her nightly ritual unless somepony could put a stop to it for good. Through good fortune, she hadn’t injured anypony last time, but who knew what would happen if it wasn’t brought under control. “D’you, uh ... you wouldn’t happen to know how to reverse this transformation, would you, Sunset? I mean, you’re almost as talented at magic as Twilight herself is.”
Almost? Sunset’s muzzle tightened momentarily in a look of amused irritation, though Fluttershy couldn’t see it.“Without knowing exactly what it was that Twilight did to you in the first place, I wouldn’t want to go messing around with any transformative magic. I might just make things worse for you.”
Studying her altered body for a moment, Fluttershy wondered just how Sunset could make things worse for her than they were now, but she eventually decided that it was probably best not to know. Instead, she asked in a plaintive voice, “You don’t think I could hurt somepony while I’m like this, do you?” Fear added a slight trembling tone to her words.
“Unless they’re an apple,” Sunset Shimmer said, trying to lighten the mood, “no.”
With a complete absence of words, Fluttershy still managed to indicate to Sunset that what she had said was in poor taste. “Can you be serious, please?” she said once she was sure Sunset was suitably chastised.
“I was.” Relenting, hating how much Fluttershy was suffering right now and wishing she could do more than offer hollow words of comfort, Sunset said reassuringly, “It’s not in your nature to hurt anypony or, come to think of it, anything at all. The only remotely monstrous thing about you is that big old heart of yours and how much you care about the welfare of others. Whether or not that thing deserves to be cared about,” she finished in a slightly distant voice.
“You think I’m wrong to care about you?” Fluttershy tilted her head to get a better look at Sunset, eyes narrowing in confusion at her.
“I was talking about Angel.” Sunset smirked but her heart just wasn’t in the joke this time.
Fluttershy shifted herself into a more comfortable position, her leathery wings wriggling against Sunset as she did so. “I’ll admit, other than what you’ve chosen to tell me so far about your past, I may not be aware of every single detail about what happened back then, but I feel like I know enough to understand why you did what you did. I mean, I definitely know enough about you to love you, and that’s all that matters to me. You might still think of yourself as some kind of demonic monster for how you once behaved, but I certainly don’t.”
Sunset’s eyes went wide, her cheeks reddening deeply, as the weight of Fluttershy’s words hit her.
Fluttershy sensed her body stiffen against hers. “What is it? Did I say something wrong?”
“You just said … you loved me.”
“Oh.” Fluttershy frowned. “Sorry.”
“Don’t apologise, it’s fine. It’s just … I didn’t expect it. Least of all now.”
Fluttershy let out the sigh that had been building up within her for the past several hours ever since the change had first come over her in the Everfree Forest. The loss of inhibitions is already starting. Next, it’ll be the overwhelming hunger. Finally, it’ll be the nightly prowling. “It’s probably just the bat talking.”
“So. You don’t love me, then?” Sunset immediately regretted saying it, wishing she could borrow Starlight Glimmer’s time-reversal spell for a moment. It was unhelpful, pushy and woefully inappropriate given the situation.
Fluttershy allowed herself to succumb to Sunset’s hug finally and she nuzzled against her neck as gently as she could, painfully aware of the fact that her frizzier than normal mane was probably making it more awkward than it usually was for her. “Can we please not discuss this right now, Sunset? It’s a really bad time.”
“Right. Sorry.” Inwardly, Sunset cursed herself for being so selfish. The important thing as of this moment was to fix Fluttershy’s condition. They could quibble over the minutiae of their relationship later. “Fluttershy?”
“Mm?”
Swallowing, Sunset said, “I love you, too.”
“You do?”
“Mm-hm.”
“Why haven’t you said anything before?”
“Mostly, I was afraid of how you might react,” replied Sunset, breathing heavily. “No offence, but you don’t do so well with pressure, and this is a lot to burden somepony with. I was going to wait, see how things were working out between us, before deciding whether to tell you or not. I, um, I’ve been thinking about some things since I arrived back here today.”
Turning to face her, still remaining within her embrace, Fluttershy looked into Sunset’s wet eyes and said, “I’m so sorry for always being so difficult-”
“-Fluttershy-”
“-Let me finish! Believe me, I know myself and how much of a chore interacting with me can be at times when I won’t come out of my shell. You’re so fierce, brave, compassionate, empathetic and intelligent, and I want to tell you all the time how wonderful and brilliant you are, but I keep fretting that I’ll get the words wrong, or you’ll hear me saying them and suddenly realise that you’ve made a big mistake in being with me all this time.” Fluttershy bit her bottom lip softly. “The truth is, I’ve been wanting to tell you about my feelings for a long time, too, but coward that I am, I pushed them down to the pit of my stomach every single moment of every single day because I was afraid of wrecking what we already had together.” She inhaled deeply, every exhalation pressing her chest against Sunset’s. At first, Sunset thought she was going to say more, but soon realised that she was simply out of breath after her little speech.
For several minutes, only silence and the sounds of their disjointed breathing passed between them. Sunset Shimmer found herself rather taken aback by the admission. Fluttershy – in both universes – was noted for being a timid creature; even if she was attracted to somepony, she would never act upon it. Not just because she was afraid of being rejected, but because she was even more afraid of the possibility that they might say yes. Being in a relationship with somepony meant living day-to-day with the fear that you could also lose them. If this bat-curse means that she’ll finally start opening up to others, maybe it isn’t such a bad thing after all? It was an awful thing to think, but at the same time, Sunset also recognised the truth of it. “I need to tell you something. Something important,” she said eventually.
“What is it?” asked Fluttershy. “You know you can tell me anything.”
“When I came back through the mirror portal to Equestria, I wasn’t really looking for anything in particular. I definitely wasn’t looking to become embroiled in a romantic affair.” She scanned Fluttershy’s face looking for any trace of annoyance at this confession; detecting none, she continued, “I mean, I guess I’d been hoping that Celestia and I could somehow mend our fences, but when that didn’t work out, I was about ready to abandon this place once and for all. There wasn’t anything for me here any more.”
“What about your family?”
“I think they’re better off without me.” Was that the truth or just something she told herself to justify her decision? “Anyway, when I met you, I found myself torn for the first time in a long time about which world I truly belonged to. I still don’t know, but more and more, I think that my future might be here. No matter where I choose to go, some will still regard me as a monster, but being here with you would at least make that prospect worth enduring.”
Another silence ensued and Sunset closed her eyes as it continued to endure, fearing the worst. She had pushed Fluttershy too far. It had been too much to place on her in one go and now she felt foolish for having said it at all when they’d agreed that their focus should be on dealing with the bat-curse first. Unfortunately, once the words had come in to her mind, it had been impossible to stop them from tumbling out of her mouth in one messy heap. Both universes had so much to offer her, and she had a lot to offer them, too, but only this one had Fluttershy. This particular version of Fluttershy who – it seemed – loved her, that is.
When she opened her eyes again, no longer able to bear the darkness, the stillness, she saw Fluttershy’s own moist ones gazing back at her; rather than making her seem more terrifying, the red tint served to render them all the more mesmerising, as if the bat-curse flowing through her was amping up the power of her natural Stare ability. Acting partly on instinct and partly on desire, and partly just to see what the Tartarus would happen if she did, Sunset pressed her muzzle against Fluttershy’s.
It was nothing more than a soft, undramatic peck on the lips; innocent, chaste and gentle, much like Fluttershy herself. Still, though, the intoxicating scent of apples and lavender filled Sunset’s nostrils as she inhaled Fluttershy’s natural scent. There was an undercurrent of something else, too. Something spicy and warm, though whether it was Fluttershy herself or some strange side-effect of the bat-curse, she couldn’t say, but there remained the exciting possibility of more to come. There was an old saying about still waters running deep, and that never seemed so true as at this moment with Fluttershy. There was a definite suggestion in her eyes that there was far more to her lurking beneath the surface.
“So,” Fluttershy said, smiling coyly when they broke contact, “this-” she gestured to herself “-doesn’t bother you, does it?”
Shaking her head, Sunset said, “I know better than most not to judge a book by its cover. What’s on the outside doesn’t matter because-” her hoof tenderly stroked Fluttershy’s chest and she felt her heartbeat thrum against it “-what’s in here is what’s important, and no matter what, you’ll always be Fluttershy. Having once been a monster myself, I can categorically state that you are nothing like me whatsoever. We’ll figure this out somehow, and if not, we’ll deal with each day as it comes.” She smiled in what she hoped was an encouraging manner. Whether it was Fluttershy or for herself, she couldn’t say.
“Thank you.” Fluttershy opened her muzzle to say more, but closed it when she realised that there wasn’t much else to add. She settled for simply kissing Sunset on the cheek.
Sunset’s eyes fixated on a point beyond the front door. It was now fully dark outside. The moon and stars were just about visible through the little window. They’d been sitting in the hallway for at least an hour now, and her legs were beginning to cramp up from the awkward posture she’d been maintaining whilst keeping Fluttershy embraced in her forelegs. “We should probably go see Twilight as soon as we can. Together, I’m sure we can solve this problem.”
“Mm. We should, shouldn’t we?” Fluttershy didn’t sound overly keen on that idea.
“Wanna leave it until tomorrow?” There was just the merest hint of playful suggestion in Sunset’s voice. “I’d love to observe first-hoof just how this curse affects you. For purely academic purposes, of course.”
“Okay,” said Fluttershy, rising a little bit unsteadily to her hooves after having been prone for so long and heading in the direction of the stairs.
Stunned, Sunset said, “What? Seriously?”
Fluttershy flashed her a look that she’d never seen before. “Scared? You’re not apples, so you have nothing to worry about, remember?” With that, she started her ascent, leaving a trail of pink and mystery in her wake.
I think I have LOTS to worry about, Sunset thought as she followed dumbly in pursuit of Fluttershy, but it, too, will have to wait until the morning.