//------------------------------//
// Chapter The Fourth 
// Story: The Equestrian Refugees 
// by InspectorSharpWit 
//------------------------------//


Chapter The Fourth, or "In Which I Await To See Just What The Fuck Is Going On Here


While I had gotten my clothes on, Fluttershy had decided to go to alert the Sisters of the news, leaving me and the group alone in the apartment. 
Great idea, Shy; leave a guy with a bunch of people who just attacked him! 
Anyway, the room gets really quiet when she leaves. Everyone’s either too guilty to talk, too pissed off to talk, or too scared that they will get their ass whooped if they talked. 
Guess which group I was in. 
Finally, I decided to break the silence. “Look, we got off on the wrong foot. Hoof. Whatever. My point is; whatever the hell’s going on here we’re not going to solve anything if we just sit like a bunch of rocks.” 
Spitfire nods in agreement. “If we’re gonna make it in this world, wherever we are, we need this guy’s help. Am I right?” 
Rainbow Dash gives a noncommittal growl, and Soarin’ and Scootaloo both seem to agree. Gilda just scoffs. 
“Whatever, dudes. If you wanna fall for this guy’s trap; I tried to warn you.” 
“Fair enough,” Spitfire grins. Turning to me, she extends her hand. “Let’s start from the top. I’m Spitfire. This is my brother Soarin’, my friends Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo, and I think you’ve already met Gilda.” 
I take her hand. “The name’s Sebastian Espinosa. Happy to finally meet you guys in person.” 
“What do you mean, ‘in person’?” asks Rainbow Dash, apparently still suspicious. 
“Well, I don’t know how to tell you this, but you guys are kind of celebrities in this world.” 
Soarin’ grins. “Sweet! Do we get perks and stuff? Like at restaurants?” 
“I guess you would… if anyone thought you were real…” 
“So wait, we’re celebrities, but we’re not real to you guys? How does that work?” 
“You guys are, well, cartoons.” 
“WHAT?!?!?” 
I grin at the group’s simultaneous reaction. “Yeah, to us you guys are cute little ponies in a little fairy land. It’s funny really; a lot of people would love to know that you guys are human now.” 
“So THAT’S how you knew we were ponies!” reasons Scootaloo. “But there’s one thing I don’t get: out of everyone in Equestria, you know who WE are? How?” 
“Well, not you guys specifically,” I explain. “It’s more like the Elements of Harmony: Rainbow Dash, Apple Jack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Twilight Sparkle. Everyone else… well, we don’t pay as much attention to them.” 
“So even in a different dimension, I’m just as awesome? I’d be surprised if it wasn’t me!” boasts Rainbow Dash. 
“I’d be creeped out if it were me,” shudders Spitfire, “random people staring at you 24/7? Ugh!” 
“Well, it wasn’t 24/7!” I say defensively. “It was more like important stuff, like you guys defeating Discord and stuff like that.” 
“Oh, so it’s kinda like the news?” asks Soarin’. 
“Well, there were some less important episodes; I remember one where Rainbow Dash got a pet or something like that.” 
“Oh, you mean Tank? You guys saw that? Sweet!” Dash smiles, “it’s like the Rainbow Dash Show I was talking about at home! I TOLD you guys something like that would be big!” 
Spitfire rolls her eyes. “Jeeze, RD, didn’t you hear the guy? They focused on your friends too!” Turning to me, the flame haired girl smiles apologetically. “Did she have as big of an ego on the TV show?” 
I nod. “You know, everyone I’ve met so far has acted exactly like they would have on the cartoon. It’s actually really cool to watch!” 
Soarin’ looks confused. “We would have tied up some random guy we didn’t know out of suspicion that he was a spy? I thought this was a kid’s show!” 
I laugh. “Well, not EXACTLY. That’s why I’m so curious to get to know you guys better.  Are you guys different from the ponies I know?” 
“Well, let’s find out; shall we?” smiles Spitfire. “Are Soarin’ and I siblings in the show?” 
I shake my head no. “That’s actually really surprising to me. I thought you guys would be… y'know…” 
Both of them groan in disgust. “Ew, that’s like, incest or something,” declares Soarin’. 
“Oh, relax, you guys!” sighs Rainbow Dash. “You aren’t even blood related!” 
“Yeah, but still…” 
I chuckle. “OK, next question.” 
Scootaloo asks this one. “Who are my best friends?” 
“Well, if I remember correctly; it’s Sweetie Bell and Applebloom, right?” 
She nods, impressed. “You forgot Spike, Pip, and Dinky, but two out of five isn’t too bad!” 
“My turn!” says Rainbow Dash with a devilish smile. “Is Gilda as much of a bitch in the show as she is in real life?” 
“Hey, fuck you, Dash!” retorts the white haired woman. 
“Yeah, actually, she was totally evil in the cartoon. She even made Fluttershy cry!” 
“I was a different griffin back then,” she growls. “I got my act together and apologized. Did that happen in your little show?” 
“Not really…” 
Gilda stays silent at this, prompting Soarin’ to talk. “OK, how about this: were Rainbow Dash and I dating?” 
“Well, there was always speculation, but the show never really cleared anything up.” 
Rainbow Dash grins. “I guess our dates were too hot for the kiddies, huh, Soarin’?” 
I stare blankly at them. “What do you mean by that?” 
Spitfire giggles a bit. “I’m guessing that you’re little cartoon didn’t show how much of a sex-freak Rainbow Dash is, huh?” 
And at that moment, a little piece of my soul died. 
Soarin’ laughs at seeing my somber reaction. “Dude, you looked like you just lost a buddy to the war or something!” 
I groan. “Oh, don’t mind me; I’m just trying to put back the pieces of my shattered childhood back together.” 
Rainbow Dash gives an impatient click of the tongue. “Look, buddy, we can’t all be saints like you guys, apparently. We’re living organisms that have their own needs and desires too!” 
Spitfire looks at the rainbow haired girl, impressed. “Wow, Dash, that was… deep!” 
Dash gives her a mischievous grin. “I’m more than just a hot body, babe.” 
I shake myself out of my depression. “Whatever, I guess. You guys are people… of some sort.” 
“And what’s THAT supposed to mean?” asks Scootaloo defensively. 
“I mean, you guys are obviously people. I just don’t know what kind yet.” 
“Well, we’re gonna find out soon enough, huh?” replies Soarin’. “The Princesses will straighten this whole thing out, I know it.” 
As if on cue, Fluttershy comes back into the apartment. “Um, guys? The Princesses want to see Sebastian now… if it’s alright.” 
I nod solemnly and get up. Turning to the other guys, I give them an awkward wave. “I guess I’ll see you guys later?” 
Spitfire gives me a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry about it; the Princesses won’t do anything stupid. They’ve seen it all by now; they’ll know what to do. Besides, you seem like an OK guy. You’re not in any danger.” 
“Yet,” sneers Gilda, giving me an evil smile. 
With that lovely idea in mind, I follow Fluttershy out of the apartment with the sinking feeling that things were just starting to get weird.