//------------------------------// // 06. So Many Flavors of Anxiety and Righteous Protective Anger // Story: Apples and Lightning // by Leaf Blade //------------------------------// A bead of sweat dripped down Applejack’s brow as she took a seat in the headmaster’s office. She had a bad feeling when Flash Sentry had told her that’s where she was needed, but she still wasn’t prepared to see the ghostly white-skinned man sitting behind the desk waiting for her. Her blood ran cold as he smiled at her, batting a lock of his long blue hair off his shoulder. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing as she swallowed a lump of anxiety. The man sitting behind the desk, staring her down, was none other than the Holy Knight of Sorcery, and supreme Commander of Equestria’s military; Commander Shining Armor. This wasn’t the first time Applejack had seen Shining Armor; he was a friend of her family, even fighting alongside her parents during the Scarlet Rebellion. They had exchanged a few words— pleasantries and formalities mostly— but this was the first time she’d really met him face-to-face. Also, it was the first she’d seen him since her transition, and she just had to hope that he wouldn’t make things awkward on that front. “Long time no see, huh, Applejack?” Shining wore a big doofus grin on his face, and for a moment Applejack almost forget that she was looking at the Commander of the military. “Last I saw you, you were the size of a bean sprout!” “Don’t lie,” Applejack chuckled leaned back in her chair, “I’ve always been big and you know that.” Applejack cleared her throat. “Anyway, sir, what is it that you called me to talk to me for?” Applejack gave a serious, albeit awkward and shaky, salute. Shining Armor just sighed and rested his cheek in his hand, his elbow propped up on the desk. “C’mon, Applejack,” he said wearily, “there’s no need to be so formal. Far as I’m concerned, you’re an old family friend. You don’t have to treat me like I’m some big shot. I’m just Shining Armor.” “With all due respect, sir,” Applejack said, trying to make eye contact with the Commander but too nervous to look anywhere other than directly over his shoulder, “I’ve been taught since I was a kid to treat my commanding officers with respect, and it don’t get more commandin’ than the Commander. It’d be dishonorable to treat you as anything less. Sir.” Shining Armor chuckled and leaned back in his chair. “Yeah, I figured you’d say something like that. You’re way too much like your old man for your own good, if I’m honest.” “Pa was a good man,” Applejack said, “so I’ll take that as a compliment, sir.” “Pear Butter would’ve just clapped her hands in my face and told me to get to my point already,” the Commander chuckled, and Applejack presumed he was just reminiscing, though she couldn’t pretend it didn’t sting a tad to hear about her ma; Applejack still missed her and her pa every day. “Then with all due respect, sir,” Applejack cleared her throat and put her arm down on her thigh, “why’d you call me in here, sir?” “Mostly I just wanted to wish you luck on the field test,” Shining Armor smiled. “But also, I haven’t had the opportunity to meet you in person before, and I wanted to rectify that. I’ve heard good things.” “I’m flattered, sir,” Applejack nodded, though she didn’t feel as flattered as she claimed. More than anything, she felt anxious. She didn’t like the idea that the Holy Knights were keeping tabs on her progress, but she also knew it’d be naïve to think that they weren’t. Her family had a longstanding history with the Knights after all, and it’d be pretty natural for everyone to have eyes on her to make sure she lived up to that legacy. “I hear you’re gunning for your brother’s spot as the Knight of Strength,” Shining Armor shot Applejack a sly grin, which made her eye twitch. “And judging by your grades, and commendations from the instructors, it sounds like you’re on the fast track to do just that. Someday you and I will probably fight together as Holy Knights, and I guess I figured I’d like to get the inevitable introductions out of the way sooner, rather than later.” “I guess that makes sense,” Applejack took a deep breath as she stood up, and she straightened her stance and gave a firm salute to the Commander. “If that’s everything, sir, I have a train to catch. Thank you for takin’ the time to meet with me, it was a real honor.” “Lying doesn’t suit you, Applejack,” Shining Armor’s tone was pleasant and jovial, but Applejack could feel an underlying tension to his words that she couldn’t quite shake. “I know it doesn’t, sir,” Applejack felt another bead of sweat start dripping down her cold skin, “that’s why I don’t—” “Applejack,” the pleasant pretense was gone, and Shining Armor’s words cut into Applejack like an icy knife, “cut the crap.” Applejack’s hand fell to her hip. If there had been a strained smile on her face before, it was gone now. She blinked, and scowled— sneered at him. “How’s yer sister, Shiny?” Shining Armor took a deep breath and steepled his fingers. “Is that what this is about?” he said irritably. “That why you’re standoffish with me?” “Honestly, sir,” Applejack shrugged, “what I toldja before wasn’t a lie. I was raised to show my commandin’ officers respect, but I can’t deny there’s a lot of personal baggage where you’re concerned. If I’m ‘standoffish’, it’s only cuz I ain’t ready or willin’ to deal with all that yet.” “Well,” Shining Armor sighed and stood up himself, and though he was tall, he didn’t quite reach Applejack’s height, “since you mentioned Twily, you might be interested to know that she’s gonna be watching the field test.” “At your insistence, no doubt,” Applejack scoffed and repetitively flicked her fingers. “Of course,” Shining Armor straightened up his suit. “It’s important that she see with her own eyes the pride of Equestria’s military, and there’s no bigger pride to the Cross than its students.” “Funny,” Applejack allowed herself a cocky grin, knowing full-well how her comment was gonna get under the Commander’s skin, “I didn’t think a dropout’d have too much use for the military’s pride.” “Her dropping out was a mistake,” the Commander said through gritted teeth. “Her enrollin’ was a mistake,” Applejack took a step toward the Commander’s desk and put her palm on it. “I was there, Shiny. I saw the tears as y’all tore her away from her ma— oh, how is Velvet, by the way?” Applejack lurched back; she knew she’d crossed a line even before the intense change in Shining Armor’s aura froze the room around her, and she let out a slow breath that she could see clearly with her eyes. “Sorry,” Applejack said nervously, wondering if it’d be a court-martial or an execution in her future. “That was over the line. I apologize.” “I’m sorry too,” the Commander grumbled, rubbing the back of his neck, and Applejack breathed a sigh of relief—which she could not see this time—as the room’s temperature went back to normal. “I shouldn’t have pushed you like that. I just don’t want there to be bad blood between us, y’know? Bright Mac was my idol, and I just—” the Commander sighed. “I want things to be okay. For everyone.” “Then why’re you pushin’ Twi into a dead end?” Applejack said with a distinct frown. She wasn’t sure it was a good idea to push her luck, but if Shining really wanted to clear up any bad blood between them, honesty was the only way to do it. “You know she ain’t gonna join the military. Not unless she’s forced to.” “I know,” the Commander took a slow, deep breath as he paced back and forth behind the desk. “I know that. And this is the last time I’m going to push the issue with her. I want her to see—” The Commander bit his lip, and his hands rifled around in his pants pockets. “It doesn’t matter. I want her to see this field test, and if it doesn’t convince her how much the Cross could use her help, then I’ll just… have to let it go.” A stagnant pause. Applejack wanted nothing more than to just leave and get on with her field test, but she didn’t know how to bring that up in a non-ugly way, so she just waited for the Commander to speak again. And waited. And… waited. “Commander?” she said after what felt like a decade of watching the Commander stare off into space. “I got a train to catch.” “Right, right,” the Commander shook his head and slapped himself awake. “Sorry, just kinda zoned out for a second there.” “No biggie,” Applejack shrugged, and she felt a blush stinging her cheeks as she realized how much she sounded like a certain someone. “I’ll just be goin—” “Hold on,” Shining Armor cleared his throat and put a palm on the desk, and Applejack grit her teeth behind a strained smile. “There is one more thing I need to say to you.” “Go ahead,” Applejack gave a half-hearted shrug. “I want you to remember,” the Commander said sternly, piercing Applejack with his icy, blue-eyed stare, “the Cross fights for Equestria, soldiers fight for the Cross. When you’re out there, remember that you have a family legacy to uphold, and you’ll be fighting with the pride and honor of the Cross on your shoulders. “Knights aren’t just soldiers, we’re beacons who shine the Cross’ values all across Equestria. Never forget that.” “Don’t worry, sir,” Applejack put a fist over her heart, “I’m gonna be a Holy Knight someday, and I know what that means. All you have to do is watch me and be impressed.” “Fair enough,” Shining Armor nodded with a half-smirk on his face, and gave a salute, “you’re dismissed, Applejack.” Applejack returned the salute, then nodded and turned to leave. She knew that “remember the Cross’ values” junk was just Shiny’s way of telling her not to make the military look bad to his sister, but she couldn’t give a fat flank about his whole thing with his sister. She wasn’t lying when she said she’d impress him though; it just wouldn’t be for his sister’s sake as much as for her own. Hell, she wasn’t even as interested in impressing him as much as she was in warning him; letting him know without a doubt the type of Knight Applejack was going to be, that she was going to take her rightful place as a Holy Knight and nothing and no one was gonna stop her. She was still nervous about him watching her and judging her performance, but she’d be damned if she didn’t pass this test with flying colors after all that, and that tension just made her want to fight even harder. This was gonna be a great day. **** Rainbow’s nose curled as she leaned against the window of the train as she and Applejack slunk by the train door, away from their private cabin and Lightning Dust so that Applejack could share her story about Shining Armor with Rainbow, and just Rainbow. “I’m gonna punch that guy,” Rainbow muttered, and Applejack laughed. “It’s not that bad, sugarcube,” Applejack said, idly brushing some hair out of Rainbow’s face. “Just a little scuffle between family friends is all.” “Yeah, you say that,” Rainbow clicked her tongue and looked away from Applejack, out at the rolling plains through the window, “but I still think the guy’s a jerk. I already wanted to punch him for everything he puts Twilight through.” “Eh, he’s just lookin’ out for her,” Applejack shrugged, “in his own bass-ackwards way.” “Why are you defending him?” Rainbow asked in disgust, Applejack taking a step back and blinking twice. “You were just telling me how much he was getting on your back, now you’re sticking up for him? What’s that about?” “Sorry,” Applejack rubbed her forearm and looked at the ground, “force of habit, I s’pose.” “I’m sorry too,” Rainbow crossed her arms and puffed up her bright red cheeks. “I didn’t mean to snap at you just there. Sorry about that.” “Don’t sweat it, hon,” Applejack chuckled and put her arm around Rainbow, pulling her into a headlock and ruffling her hair. Rainbow tried to protest at first, but quickly realized it wasn’t actually that bad being rough-handled by Applejack. “Anyway,” Rainbow playfully shoved Applejack away and looked back out the window with a big grin, “I’m excited the field test’s taking place around Fillydelphia! That’s my terf! I wanted to take you and the girls out for drinks after the test, and I know this great little hole in the wall place—” “’Hole in the wall’?” Applejack arched an eyebrow and gave a smug smirk. “What’re you, a tour guide now?” “Whatever!” Rainbow stuck out her tongue, trying to hold back a chuckle for a sec before she let it free thanks to Applejack’s gleaming smile. “Anyway, it’s a great place. They have awesome cider, you’re gonna love it! It’s super chill too, so Fluttershy and Twilight are gonna have a great time.” “Twilight’ll be there?” Applejack said, turning pale. Rainbow turned to see the stricken look on her face and arched a confused eyebrow. “Is… that okay? Like, I know you have some beef with Shining Armor, but Twilight’s cool, so don’t worry about that.” “I’m not, I just—” Applejack shook her head, “How do you know Twilight?” “She’s my roommate?” Rainbow cocked her head, totally lost on what Applejack was reacting to. “Why, do you know her?” “Not especially,” Applejack bit her thumb. “But like I said, Shiny’s a family friend, so I’ve met Twi on a couple of occasions, mostly big formal get-togethers.” “I’m sure she was the life of the party, right?” Rainbow rolled her eyes, cringing at just the thought of poor Twi having to put up with a big formal party. “Heh, yeah,” Applejack chuckled nervously, but then cleared her throat and drew herself up. “Y’know what, it’ll be real nice to get to meet Twilight—like, actually meet her. I’m lookin’ forward to it.” “Awesome!” Rainbow beamed and punched Applejack’s arm. “You two are gonna get on great. You’re both big nerds!” “Hey! I am not—” Applejack’s protests were cut off by Rainbow’s snickering, and Rainbow glanced over to see Applejack was turning bright red and fuming. Suddenly, Applejack closed the distance between them and looked dead-on down into Rainbow’s eyes, grabbing Rainbow gently on the back of the neck and pushing her into Applejack’s chest. “Uh, w-woah, AJ,” Rainbow stammered, her whole face turning red as she lifted her hands and suddenly realized there was nowhere to put them on AJ’s chest that wouldn’t be weird, “what’s this abou—” “And yer easily flustered,” Applejack grinned ear to ear as she stepped away from Rainbow, leaving her a bright red and huffy mess. “C’mon, what the hell!” Rainbow shouted, ignoring the weird looks she was getting from the other train-goers. “Don’t play with a girl’s h—uh, well anyway! Don’t just do weird stuff like that! People are gonna get the wrong idea!” “Who’s gonna get the wrong idea?” Applejack put a hand on her hip and smugly rolled her eyes. “I dunno,” Rainbow groaned bitterly, “Lightning Dust?” Applejack bit her lip. “Y’all got into a fight, didn’t you?” “I don’t like her,” Rainbow huffed. “She’s not invited to the drinking party.” “Ugh, I was afraid this’d happen,” Applejack slapped her hand across her face, slowly dragging it down until she pinched her fingers around the bridge of her nose. “Lightning’s cool, Rainbow, I promise. Plus she’s trans like us, so will you please give her another shot?” Rainbow grumbled under her breath. “Look, I’ll talk to her about fightin’ with you,” Applejack sighed. “I mean, I already did talk to her about not buttin’ heads with you, that’s what we were discussin’ when you jumped on my back earlier.” “Doesn’t sound like she was listening,” Rainbow muttered. “I guess not,” Applejack said bitterly, “but everyone makes mistakes. I’ll talk to her, get her to apologize, and then will you give her another shot? For my sake?” Rainbow looked at Applejack’s pleading smile, and the hands she held clasped in front of her, and thought to herself that she couldn’t resist such a pretty lady’s request, before immediately smothering that thought in the dark recesses of the Vault Of Things We Don’t Think Or Talk About. “Yeah, okay,” Rainbow sighed dramatically. “If you’re that desperate for me to like her, I guess I can give her another shot.” “Thank ye kindly, Rainbow,” Applejack wrapped her arms around Rainbow and brought her into a hug before she even knew what was happening, and judging by the sudden tensing of Applejack’s body, before Applejack realized what she’d done. Applejack pushed Rainbow away and cleared her throat, and Rainbow snickered. “Looks like I’m not the only one easily flustered,” she said with a sharp grin, and Applejack rolled her eyes and tried to look unimpressed, but she was obviously forcing back a smile. Applejack and Rainbow returned to their private cabin, where Lightning Dust was lying on her back looking at the ceiling, though she jolted to her feet when the pair arrived. “There you guys are!” she laughed, and Applejack felt a knot in her stomach as she realized Lightning was completely dense to the frustration she and Rainbow were projecting. “Thought you were gonna leave me hangin’ the whole train ride!” “Lightning Dust,” Applejack said exasperatedly, “Rainbow told me y’all got into a fight. I left y’all alone for like five minutes! I told you not to butt heads, Lightning!” “Look,” Lightning Dust shrugged, “it’s not my fault if Rainbow Dash can’t handle a little good-natured ribbing or a few friendly jabs without taking it personally.” Applejack said nothing; just frowned and raised her eyebrow. Lightning rolled her eyes and groaned loudly. “Alright fine,” she said, like a child being forced to eat their vegetables, “I’m sorry, I guess. Sorry you took my jokes way too seriously, Rainbow Dash, geez.” Applejack’s mouth hung open. She’d never heard a worse apology in her life. “Wow, that was awful,” Rainbow said in utter amazement. “Like, I don’t believe a single word of that. That was so unbelievable, I’m almost wondering if you’re like a mannequin crudely pretending to be a human being. Yikes.” Lightning just shrugged, with an irritatingly smug grin on her face. “Look, I’m sorry you got mad,” she said, “but I can’t apologize for being extremely—” “Lightning Dust,” Applejack said firmly, snapping the young woman to attention. “I asked you not to butt heads with Rainbow. We were talkin’ about it literally seconds before Rainbow showed up! And you immediately picked a fight soon as I turned my back! You’re my friend, think about how that makes me feel for a darn second!” Applejack breathed heavily, hands clenched into fists at her sides as she glared at Lightning. She was mad on so many levels, but more than that she was anxious; she’d already been worried that two of her only three good friends wouldn’t get along, but Lightning promised her that it wouldn’t be an issue, and to see that promise broken minutes after it was made hurt Applejack deeply. Rainbow stood back, one hand in her uniform’s pants pocket and the other’s thumbnail between her teeth as she slowly shook her head. She looked almost as upset as Applejack felt— No, if anything she looked even angrier, like she was just itching to start a fight on Applejack’s behalf right then and there. And while that sentiment oddly warmed Applejack’s heart in a way, it was also the last thing either of them needed right now. Lightning took a step back and blinked. Applejack’s outburst had, if nothing else, at least wiped the smugness from her face. “Eh—I, um—” Lightning cleared her throat. “I’m sorry, Applejack. Like, really sorry.” Lightning scrunched up her face and flicked her fingers at the window. “Like, I didn’t mean to tick you off—eh, no that sucks, lemme try again. “I did promise you that I wouldn’t be a dick to Rainbow Dash,” she sighed bitterly, like it was physically hurting her to release her ego, “and I totally went back on that promise. That was pretty lousy of me, and you didn’t deserve that. Neither of you did, so yeah. I’m—I, uh—” Lightning loudly cleared her throat, like she was a cat hacking up a hairball. She quickly bowed her head before rising just as fast, drawing herself up and giving a salute. “So yeah, I’m sorry, you guys. My bad.” Applejack’s eyes widened and she just blinked, at a total loss for what to say. She turned to Rainbow, hoping that she was just as impressed by that apology as Applejack was, and was relieved to see a bright smile on Rainbow’s face, Rainbow even giving Applejack a thumbs-up for good measure. “Water under the bridge, Lightning Dust,” Rainbow stepped forward and held out her hand, and Lightning didn’t think twice before shaking it. “Let’s just pretend that whole mess never happened and start fresh.” “Sounds good to me, Dash,” Lightning nodded firmly, and Applejack breathed an incredible sigh of relief. “Thank you, Lightning Dust,” Applejack gave a warm smile, and Lightning replied with a cocky grin and bat of her hand. “Don’t worry about it, AJ,” she said, and Applejack put her arm around Lightning and dragged her into a friendly headlock. And for a moment, Applejack wondered why she had ever worried about her friends at all; they were pretty alright. Rainbow, Lightning, and Applejack were gathered around a table in the food car, with Rainbow and Lightning piling up food onto their plates; they couldn’t totally nail the field test on an empty stomach, after all! Applejack had a much more ‘modest’ portion, and most of it was fruits and junk, cuz she was a boring lamer who didn’t have the cool guts that Rainbow had. Or Lightning, for that matter, who Rainbow was starting to slowly warm up to, she guessed. “So Lightning,” Rainbow said as the two sat back down at their table with a third helping of meat, while Applejack still poked around at her first helping of like applesauce or some other gross thing for weirdos, “Applejack says you’re a cool trans gal like me and her!” “Hell yeah,” Lightning raised her fist, and Rainbow pounded hers against it, “trans pride for life.” “You have a pretty sick name,” Rainbow beamed, “come up with it yourself?” “Sorta,” Lightning leaned back in her chair with her hands behind her head. “To be honest, I just named myself after the two coolest things I could think of.” “I mean,” Rainbow snickered, “that’s pretty much what I did too. Not sure that gross dirt fog is ‘cool’ though.” “Ha, no,” Lightning scoffed and shook her head. “My last name’s taken from Diamond Dust.” “Diamond Dust?” Rainbow asked, her mouth full of fried chicken. “Rainbow,” Applejack sighed, “don’t chirp with your mouth full.” Rainbow had half a mind to stuff her whole mouth with food and then ‘chirp’ right in Applejack’s face, but instead she chewed quietly and swallowed before talking again. “Who’s Diamond Dust?” she asked. “Uh, who’s Diamond Dust?” Lightning asked incredulously, practically spitting out her food. “What, have you lived under a rock for ten years?” Rainbow’s eye twitched and she was about to tell Lightning Dust off, but Applejack chimed in instead. “Diamond Dust was a hero in the Scarlet Rebellion,” she said. “Youngest student to ever graduate the Academy, he joined the frontlines at eighteen, and was invincible with a sword in his hand.” “Woah,” Rainbow smiled and tapped her nails against the table. “Sounds like a real badass.” “Yeah he was!” Lightning pounded her fists on the table and grinned ear to ear. “He was the coolest! Dude couldn’t be beat at all! As soon as he hit the field, the enemy knew they were done for! I wanna be that cool!” “Damn,” Rainbow leaned back in her chair and bit down on her thumbnail. “This guy really all he’s cracked up to be, AJ?” “Absolutely,” Applejack nodded, smiling proudly. “Never met him myself, but Diamond Dust was a good friend of my parents. They fought side by side for a good deal of the Rebellion, and my parents both always said he was the only swordsman better’n they were, and comin’ from them that is some high praise.” “Huh,” Rainbow almost felt bad that she’d never heard of this guy before, but she didn’t like to think about the Rebellion very much, and she couldn’t be bothered to learn about historical figures anyway. “So if he was so tough, what happened to him?” “Who knows?” Applejack shrugged. “Disappeared near the end of the Rebellion. Some say he died in battle, others say he turned traitor, but only thing that’s certain is he was never heard from again.” “Body ever found?” Rainbow side-eyed Lightning Dust. “Nope,” Lightning replied with a grin. “So he’s definitely still alive,” Rainbow smirked, and Lightning’s own smile widened as she nodded her head. The sudden blaring of the train whistle interrupted any further train of thought, and Rainbow was on her feet instantly as a jolt of excitement rocked her body. This was it. it was finally time to prove herself, and she couldn’t wait. “Welp,” Applejack smiled broadly as she stood to her feet, adjusting her hat, “looks like this is our stop.” “Hope you’re ready to kick some serious butt, you guys,” Rainbow clapped her hands and rubbed them together. “Born ready,” Lightning grinned wickedly. “Then let’s go ace this thing!” Rainbow held out her fist, and Applejack and Lightning Dust pounded theirs against it. This was gonna be an awesome day.