Oh Spike We Hardly Knew Thee

by 5u0myn0n4


Chapter 11: Pinkie Investigates

Originally published on January 8, 2018


It had been several weeks since Spike's disappearance. This chapter takes place one day after the events of Chapter 9. Without Spike, Twilight was in shambles, and her friends grew worried. They wanted to help, but they had done all they could. Or rather I should say, they've done almost all they could do. A certain Pink pony wasn't ready to give up, but let's not get ahead of ourselves. How were Twilight's friends doing since their conversation yesterday?


Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy were all having lunch at the Ponyville Café. Twilight and Starlight were in the castle, and Pinkie Pie... well we'll get to her.

"I just feel terrible, we've done everything we could, but after searching most every inch of Equestria, nothing. And now Twilight's more heartbroken than ever." Rarity said.
"I know right? This sucks, I've never felt so helpless before. I wish I could just fly to wherever Spike is and bring him back home where he belongs." said Rainbow Dash.

No pony wanted to admit defeat, or give up, but the odds were stacked against them.

"You've been quiet sugarcube, anything on your mind?" Applejack asked Fluttershy.
"My biggest worry, is that if Twilight remains in isolation for too long, what that can do to her psyche. If she continues to mope in her room alone, I fear after enough time she may fall into a spiral of depression..." Fluttershy said.
"Wow Fluttershy, way to be a downer." Rainbow Dash said.
"I'm sure it won't get to that point darling." Rarity said.
"Maybe not, but I'm still concerned." Fluttershy said.
"When did you become a negative nancy? Where's Pinkie to lighten the mood?" asked Rainbow Dash.
"I think she mentioned something about helping out ponies in the hospital. She said something about wanting to help any pony she could, as she didn't feel helpful around Twilight." Applejack said.


And that brings us to Ponyville Hospital, where Pinkie Pie was indeed there helping out. She had walked up to the clerk's desk, and asked what she could do to help. The clerk told her she could hand out flowers to help cheer up the sick and injured ponies. The clerk pointed Pinkie in the direction of the rooms, and she went on her way.
Pinkie was standing in the hall, about to enter the rooms and cheer up ponies, but was having second thoughts.

Okay, here we go. Should I be cheery and over the roof? Or is that not appropriate? Twilight didn't seem to appreciate my energy, so why would these patients? Maybe this wasn't a good idea. I took that stranger's advice yesterday, but now I'm not so sure what to do.

"What's the hold up? Why are you standing there?" asked a doctor who was passing by.

Alright Pinkie, you can do this. You gotta believe in yourself. Keep it lively, but not too over the top. she thought.

Finally, Pinkie worked up the confidence to enter the room.

"Hey every pony, it's your neighborhood party planner Pinkie Pie!" she said.
"And while I am known for parties, I'm here just to put smiles on your faces with smaller, not so loud acts of kindness, like handing out flowers." Pinkie said.

Pinkie surveyed the room. There were three patients in this particular room. She walked up to the first patient on the right.

"What do we have here? A case of the pony pox? I remember when Apple Bloom had the most severe case of pony pox I'd ever seen. You look to be in better shape than she was, and I hope you get well soon." Pinkie said. She put a flower on the desk next to the patient.

The patient couldn't speak, but they nodded and smiled.

Pinkie walked to next patient, a pony who looked sick to the stomach.

"Oh what's this? Looks like some pony's eaten baked bads, been there done that. Least fun experience involving sweets I've ever had. Here's a token of my good will, and I hope you recover soon." Pinkie sat the flower on the patient's lap.
The patient tried to speak, but Pinkie insisted they not as to not strain their voice.

Finally was the last, and most perplexing of the patients in the room.

"And here we have... huh? What do we have here? I don't recognize this. This pony is completely frozen! But without ice!" exclaimed Pinkie Pie.
"Excuse me Nurse, what's going on here?" asked Pinkie the nurse in the room.
"This? Oh this. It is unusual indeed, what we have here is the most severe (and first actually) case of paralysis." the Nurse explained.
"Tell me nurse about this Paralysisasisasisasis." Pinkie asked.
"It's like, imagine not being able to move your body. It can happen after being affected by a huge surge of electricity." the nurse explained.
"Hmm, electricity. That is pretty shocking... Shocking, that's what the stranger told me yesterday. Is this what they were talking about? Pinkie thought.
"How long has the patient been here?" she asked.
"I forget the exact amount of time, but I believe he came in the day after you planned that big party for the baby Ponyville." the nurse said.
"The day after Baby Moon Beam's party? Hmm, *GASP* Spike went missing the day after Moon Beam's party! Coinkydink!? It seems unlikely, but it's a lead, and we haven't had any lead until now. Something tells me this pony knows something important." Pinkie said.

"Whatever you say, but looks like he won't be speaking anytime soon." the nurse said.
"Darn. So tell me nurse, do you know what caused this?" Pinkie asked.
"We don't know exactly, all I know is that this is how paramedics found him after the train derailing incident." the nurse said.
"Interesting, hmm, wait... WHAT TRAIN DERAILING?!" Pinkie asked.

"You didn't hear? The night of the party, the Friendship Express derailed late at night on its way to Ponyville for docking. The incident injured the few ponies who were on board, but thankfully no lives were lost." The nurse said.
"I'm mostly surprised that the train derailed and nopony told any of us! Was this talked about at all?" Pinkie asked.
"It was in the foal free press." The nurse held up the newspaper with the exact article. "But I guess the story was overshadowed by the disappearance of Spike the Dragon." the nurse flipped to the front page, with the headline; Spike the Brave and Glorious, Gone Missing.
"How does an entire train derail anyway?" Pinkie asked.
"They didn't say any details, other than it was an accident." The nurse said.
"Who is they?" Pinkie asked.
"...No comment." the nurse closed her lips quickly.


"Alrighty then, so what do we have in front of us? A pony who was paralyzed in a train accident that happened on the same night Spike went missing. We don't know how the train derailed, or how this pony here was paralyzed, or how Spike fits into this if at all." Pinkie pondered. "GAH! So many questions! This looks like a job for Detective Pinkie Pie!"

Pinkie pulled out her detective hat and put it on her head. She then pulled out her pipe and put it in her mouth, and blew bubbles. All in the name of unleashing Detective Pinkie Pie. Equestria's Greatest Detective.

Pinkie paced back and forth.

"Let's do some deep thinking. Spike just might have been involved in this incident, and that pony is the only one I know who definitely saw it. Did Spike attack the train? What did the pony see?!" she thought out loud.
"But without his eyewitness account, my ideas have no evidence to back them up! Oh, if only you could talk. The things you could tell me." she said.

Pinkie was thinking of solutions, when she got an idea.

"Maybe he can! A little medicine always cured something to an extent. I'm no expert on medicine, but I know a Zebra who is. Leave the detective work to me, and the healing to her." Pinkie said.

Pinkie zoomed out of the hospital, and returned soon thereafter with an elixir.


"Alright so normally I would've have shared my conversation with Zecora, but I handled everything behind the scenes. All you need to know is that she gave me this elixir that she said will cure this pony's paralysis. She said "If this pony has, what you seek, a dash of my brew, will make him speak." I know that this seems anti-climactic, and you're probably already typing up a review saying "You introduced a mystery just to solve moments later? There's no build up!" Well first off, thank you for the feedback, and second, this is only a small piece of the puzzle. I'm on a mission to solve the big mystery of Spike's location. I thought I'd just cut to the important details. Sometimes if you have a lot of ideas, it pays to streamline them." Pinkie said.

"Who are you talking to?" the nurse asked.
"Nobody. I'm just thinking out loud." Pinkie said.


"Zecora gave me this medicine which is supposed to cure the paralysis." Pinkie said.
"I'm not sure how I feel about you using experimental medicine on my patients." the nurse said.
"What did you say? I was too busy feeding this medicine into his snout." Pinkie said. She had already poured the medicine down the pony's snout.
"This had better work, otherwise you'll be hearing from my lawyer." the nurse said.
"It's got to work." Pinkie said.

The elixir didn't seem to do anything at first, but then the pony started to twitch. Then got up in a pinch.

"AAHH! I'm sorry I just wanted to help sir!" the pony sat up and screamed.
"Wait, this isn't the railway, this is a hospital. How long have I been-?" he asked.
"You've been in a coma like state for a few weeks! And we just cured your paralysis. Now get talking!" Pinkie demanded.
"What was the last thing you remember seeing being blacking out!?" she asked.
"Woah, slow down, I just woke up." the pony said.
"Fine, let's take things slow. I'm Pinkie Pie, and you've been frozen for a while, and I'm very curious as to what happened to you before you blacked out." Pinkie said.
"Well, I'm the Conductor of the Friendship Express. And if you're curious, I suppose I can tell you what I saw while it's fresh on my mind." the Conductor began to explain.


The Conductor narrated his flashback of the night Spike disappeared.

"Me and the other ponies in charge of operating the Friendship Express were on the train. We had departed from the Crystal Empire and were bound for Ponyville to dock the train for the night. We were about halfway there, when..." His voice tailed off.
"When what?" Pinkie asked getting closer and widening her eyes.
"And..." he gulped. "Disaster..."

Everything was going well, when all of the sudden there was a massive collision at the front of the train. Every pony in the cabins flew forward, and then sideways as the train fell of its rails and landed on its side. It landed on its side, and made a deafening sound of metal screeching against the ground. The train came to a screeching halt. As quickly as it happened, things went quiet.

All the ponies were in the dark, and injured. Most couldn't get up, and even fewer had any idea what to do. The Conductor was miraculously fine, he was in the front cabin. He used an emergency exit on the ceiling to get out of the train. He made his way outside to investigate what they could have possibly hit.
He trotted to the front of the train, and just ahead of him, he saw exactly what hit the train. He wished he could forget what he saw.

"What did you see? What hit the train?" Pinkie asked.
"What I saw, it was, *gulp* some sort of carriage, but not an ordinary horse drawn carriage, some kind of horseless carriage, made of metal." The Conductor answered. "It was huge, about half the size of a train cabin, had wheels made of rubber, and these bright spotlights at the front. There were three ponies standing next to the machine." he said.

"I approached the carriage, and then..." he explained.

The Conductor was gripped by a powerful magic force. The eyes of the largest of the ponies lit up, and stared into his soul.

"What are you doing? Stop this! AAAHH!" the Conductor screamed. And then his world went blank.

"I felt a huge sensation of pain throughout my whole body, and that was the last thing I remembered before everything went blank. And the next thing I knew, I was here woken up by you, which brings us to now." he said.


The flashback concluded.

Pinkie thought deep about the story.

"So... the night Spike vanished, a horseless carriage made of metal crashed into the Friendship Express? What has that got to do with Spike?" Pinkie asked. "You didn't see Spike there did you?"
"I didn't see Spike, but maybe he was inside the horseless carriage. It must've been heading opposite way we were if it crashed head on." the Conductor suggested.

"Right, if it collided head on, and you were heading to Ponyville, then the horseless carriage was going the opposite direction, meaning they came from Ponyville and headed somewhere North." Pinkie said.

"Are you still hurt?" Pinkie asked.
"A little, but I'll recover, thanks to you." the conductor thanked.

"You're welcome. And thank you very much for your insight Mr. Conductor Pony. Any evidence is valuable evidence." Pinkie said. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a baby dragon to find!"
"Good luck on your search Pinkie Pie." the conductor said.


Pinkie Pie wasted no time assembling the evidence. She theory crafted in her secret party planning room. She had a giant map of Equestria on her wall, with all the areas the ponies had searched for Spike crossed out with red marker, and thumbtacks embedded in the map. Pinkie was using her new knowledge to try to figure out where Spike could be.

"Assuming there really was a so called horseless carriage that collided with the train but survived, and assuming Spike was inside said carriage, then it leaves reason to believe that Spike was taken by whoever the driver of the metal horseless carriage. Metal horseless carriage, metal horseless carriage, gee that's a mouthful. I should shorten it. Horseless carriage? Carriage? Ca-ca-... car? Sure we'll go with that car." she said.

"The train was heading South to Ponyville when it collided with the car, meaning the car was doing the opposite. It was departing from Ponyville after kidnapping Spike, and heading North." she said. "So we can safely assume that Spike is North of this latitude." She drew a latitude line in her map.

"Hmm, but we already searched North, but maybe we didn't search far enough North." she thought.

Pinkie looked at her map.

"The furthest point North we searched for Spike was the Crystal Empire, however, that isn't the Northernmost point in Equestria." Pinkie looked beyond the Crystal Empire.

"Could Spike, be hidden... in the-" Pinkie's thought was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell ringing.
"It's the mail! What kind of mail have we got today?"

Pinkie went outside, and met with Derpy who was delivering the mail.
"Thanks." she said.
Derpy gave a wave and a smiled and flew off.

"What do we have here? It's a letter from the Yaks!" she said.
Pinkie read the letter in her best Yak impression. "Dear Pink Pony, Yaks receive letter written by pink pony asking of purple dragon."

"Wait a second, I never wrote a letter to the Yaks! So what gives? Is there an identity thief sending letters under my name? Eh. I'll worry about it later." Pinkie said.

She kept reading the letter in Yak impression.

"Yaks no see purple dragon in snow, however, Yaks do find mysterious tracks in snow. Tracks not made by Yaks, or ponies, or dragons. Not sure if related to purple dragon, but Yaks thought Pink Pony be interested." -The Yaks.

Included was a photo of the tracks in question. Pinkie took one look at the photo and gasped.

"These tracks look like they were made by something traveling on rubber wheels! They match exactly with the Conductor's description of the metal horseless carriage car thingy!" she exclaimed.
"The Yaks sure are smart, they apparently have photography, and even wrote the coordinates, and which way North is relative to the angle the photo was taken."
"But how can I be sure about the validity of all of this? The Yaks' letter and photo look legit, but the fact that I never wrote them a letter makes this very strange." she said. "Let's just see how this fits into the puzzle before I cross this off.


Pinkie ran back to her investigation room, and placed the photograph on her map where the coordinates said it was taken.

"If we follow the coordinates, that would mean the photo was taken here. If North is that way, then the tracks were heading East, this way." Pinkie drew a line on her map.

"If Spike was kidnapped by somepony driving a metal horseless carriage car heading North of the Crystal Empire but East of Yakyakistan, then all this evidence paints an picture pointing..."

Pinkie drew an arrow on her map. She then drew a circle that the arrow pointed to.
She started at the map for a moment.

*GASP* "Oh my gosh!"

Pinkie had figured it out.

"TWILIGHT! I KNOW WHERE SPIKE IS!" Pinkie ran out of Sugercube Corner with the news, yelling and screaming through Ponyville. She ran strait for Twilight's castle to deliver the news.


"Twilight! I-" Pinkie busted through the doors of Twilight's castle, where Applejack immediately put her hoof in Pinkie's mouth. The other members of the mane 6 were in the castle too.

"Hold on there sugarcube. What's got you more riled up than a dog at a barking convention?" Applejack asked.
"I have important information I have to relay to Twilight." Pinkie said.
"I'm not if now's a good time darling." Rarity said.
"But this is important!" Pinkie said.

"Oh hey girls." Twilight and Starlight walked into the room. Twilight greed her friends. "Didn't know you were here. And Pinkie, sorry for yesterday." she apologized.

"I forgive you. How are you feeling yourself Twilight?" Pinkie asked.
"I'm good. After some much needed rest, my mind is in a much better place. I've developed a newfound motivation for searching for Spike. I'm willing to turn over every stone until I find him." Twilight said.
"Funny you should mention Spike, that's just the reason I'm here." Pinkie said. "I have some startling information to tell you."
"You do?" Twilight wasn't expecting Pinkie to have information.

"You girls aren't going to believe this." Pinkie said.
"We aren't going to believe?" Starlight asked.
"Uh, I mean, I hope you believe, because I got big news." Pinkie said.
"Whatever it is just say it!" Rainbow Dash said.

Pinkie took a deep breath, and spoke.

"I think I might know where Spike is." Pinkie said.
Everypony was silent.
"You do?" Twilight asked in disbelief.
"Yeah, I mean, I don't know for sure, I haven't looked there myself, but I did some detective work of my own, and I have some compelling evidence!" Pinkie said.
"Are you sure about this darling?" Rarity asked.
"When have I been wrong?" Pinkie asked.
"Where do I start?" Rainbow Dash started.
"Okay so some of my first assumptions aren't always on point, but when the detective hat comes on, it's serious time." Pinkie said
"Watch out guys, Pinkie's serious." Rainbow threw her hooves up and said sarcastically.
"Really I mean it this time. I have evidence, I can prove it!" Pinkie reached over and pulled map of Equestria, she presented it to her friends.

"As you can see, these are all the locations we searched for Spike. We've searched almost everywhere, except for..." Pinkie pointed furiously to the Northern section of the map.
The mountains North of the Crystal Empire were circled in red marker, and a picture of Spike was pinned in the middle.

"I believe Spike was taken North, beyond the Crystal Empire. He's hidden somewhere in the snowy region of Frozen North." Pinkie Pie said.

Every pony was silent.

"I can see you're all silent with awe. Allow me to explain myself." Pinkie took a deep breath before beginning her lengthy explanation.

"Here's what happened; Something broke in and entered your castle and stole Spike right from under your snout! They stuffed him in some kind of horseless carriage, and drove North. On the way, they collided with the Friendship Express, causing it to derail. The carriage was unharmed, which is remarkable, and scary. They paralyzed a pony who I met at the hospital, and they continued to drive. Normally that'd be it, but my friends the Yaks found, THIS!" Pinkie pointed to the picture of the tracks. "Tracks that match the Conductor's description of what he saw. The truth is obvious. Spike was kidnapped and taken to some secret facility in the Frozen North!" Pinkie exclaimed.

She and the other ponies looked at her map, and read the notes she'd written. After a couple of minutes, all the ponies in the room were up to speed.

"Twilight? Twilight?" Pinkie asked, but Twilight stood silent.
"I'm impressed with your detective work. It's just, it's..." Twilight didn't know what to say.
"It's an interesting theory sugarcube, but, I just don't know about it." Applejack said.
"It's more than a theory, this is strong evidence pointing towards Spike's possible location!" Pinkie exclaimed.
"I want to believe you Pinkie, but you might be in over your head this time." Rainbow Dash said.
"Nonsense! If you want more proof, then let's go to this super secret location. Even if there's nothing there, it's one location we haven't looked yet, and that has to be worth something." Pinkie said.
"I mean, what are the odds an entire train derailed and none of us noticed?" Applejack asked.
"News can fly under the radar." Pinkie said.
"How long did it take from start of investigation to now?" Rarity asked.
"Just today." Pinkie answered.
"I think this is too soon. You've only just started your investigation, and here you are with an audacious theory." Rarity said.
"I'm serious about this! I have evidence! E-v-e-d-e-n-s-e!" Pinkie was so serious she spelled evidence wrong.
"I've never heard Pinkie talk so seriously and so strait. And when Pinkie Pie is actually serious, you know it's serious." Fluttershy said.

"I think what everypony's trying to say is, is that this is a lot to take in at once." Starlight said.
"What I was going to say, was that I have to admit it, but your evidence is... compelling. Spike didn't run away, he was taken, and based on this evidence, that's where he was taken." Twilight said. "For weeks there's been no trace, and now to have a solid lead, it feels, I don't know how it feels."
"See, I knew all my detective work would lead to a breakthrough." Pinkie said.
"Why would Spike be taken that far North?" Fluttershy asked.
"It makes sense actually. It's the perfectly place to hide a dragon. He could be hidden in some bunker or compound, where it's mildly warm inside. If a dragon were to escape, they wouldn't make it far in the blistering cold.

"So even if you've potentially figured out where Spike is, the question remains; who took Spike?" Rarity asked the dreaded question.

There was another period of silence, that was soon interrupted.

*knock knock*
Somepony was knocking on the door..

"There's somebody at the door." Applejack said.
"Don't answer it Twilight. Or at least if you do, hide the evidence Pinkie. I have a bad feeling that somepony's on to us." Fluttershy said.
"Oh relax. I'm sure there's nopony dangerous at the door." Twilight said trotting to the door.

Twilight opened the door, and there were two ponies at the doorway.

"Hello Twilight." said the pony.
"Do I know you?" Twilight asked.
"Remember? That Pink pony planned a party for our daughter." the other pony responded.
"Oh, I remember you now. We were at your daughter's party at the beginning of this story." Twilight said.
"I honestly forgot all about you." Applejack said.
"Wow Applejack, I get your thing is honesty, but that was kind of rude." Rainbow Dash said.
"Mr. and Mrs. Beam correct? You were rude to Spike that day, even before the accident." Twilight said.
"And we're deeply sorry." Mr. Beam apologized.
"We have our reasons for being bias, but that doesn't make it okay." Mrs. Beam said.
"What reasons?" Twilight asked.

"More on that later, but we're here about your lost dragon." Mr. Beam said.
"What's it to you?" Twilight asked.
"We have some important information we think you'd be... interested in hearing." Mr. Beam said.

"We don't need your insider info! I already figured out roughly where Spike could be." Pinkie said. "He's very likely based on our evidence around this red circle North of the Crystal Empire. Take a look."
The two looked at Pinkie's map.
"This is really convincing, but do you know who took Spike?" Mr. Beam asked.
"All I know is that there was a metal horseless carriage (or car for short), based on these trails an eyewitness testimony. As for who or what was driving the car, we can only guess." Twilight said.
"Well we think we might know, who took Spike." Mrs. Beam said.
"Who?" Twilight asked.
"The pony who stole your dragon is..."
"Is who!?" Twilight asked.
"Our son..." they said simultaneously.
"WHAATT!?" Every pony exclaimed.
Pinkie drank a glass of water, just to do a spit take.
"WHAAATT!?" Pinkie screamed and spat in Starlight's face.


Wait... what?! Things just got weird. These characters we saw in just the first chapter aren't one offs? How can this be? Their daughter was little baby Moon Beam, but their son... took Spike? It's all very strange indeed. Tune in next chapter where the story continues. Who's perspective next chapter? Find out later. You won't want to miss it.


Apologies if this chapter is on the longer side, but there is a lot of information to get through.

Also, my other fics aren't abandoned, they're just taking more time than this fic, but they are coming.

Have a nice day.