"Thought that I was going crazyyyyy...."
She sings, only she doesn't, and yet she does.
"Just having one of those daaaaaays, yeah!"
A pirouette, a black microphone cable twirling like a lasso, and the lithe body scuffles to a stop. Within the next microsecond, the carefree dancer is shimmying left and right, bobbing with the Glam Pop beat.
"Didn't know what to doooo..."
Crystal blue eyes peek through bedroom eyes, fluttering hungrily towards the camera. A hand slowly travels up a scrap of blue denim booty shorts, up an exposed golden midriff, then past a blood-tight white scrap of cotton-white absurdity scarcely covering a flat-flat chest. At the end of its alluring trip, the hand cups a pert chin that briefly pouts before—
"Then there was youuuuuu~~~..."
Flash Sentry blows a kiss.
Flash Sentry's cheeks flush.
Flash Sentry is wearing less than two square feet of fabric over his whole nimble sweaty figure.
And this in no way stops him from swaying and twerking—with dramatic motions of his short-short-short-shorts-wrapped butt with each beat of the music as he chirps gleefully along with the catchy number crackling over unseen speakers.
"And everythiiiiing went from wrong to riiiiight"
He spins again, this time thrusting that denim'd ass towards the viewer, making sure to look over his shoulder and smolder devilishly the entire time.
"And the staaaaaaaars caaaaaaame out and filled—"
Plink!
A feminine figure tapped the middle of the tablet, pausing the video in mid Flash Crack.
Sunset Shimmer leaned back from the table in the middle of the band room after school—the same band room depicted in the scantily-clad dance number. She took a long deep breath, then released.
All was silent, save for the casual hum of the school's humming a/c unit above.
Sunset chewed on her bottom lip. She looked like she was going to say something... but then she didn't. And then she looked over her shoulder.
Six girl-heads leaned in tight like pastel-haired coconuts, crouching behind the stool where Sunset was sitting. Each had their eyes widely-locked on the frozen image of their frozen, sashaying acquaintance.
Sunset blinked at them. Calmly, she turned back to the tablet in front of all of them that—unfortunately—captured her ex-boyfriend in mid butt-thrust. With a solemn sigh, she raised her finger again... lingered... and finally tapped the screen again.
Plink!
"—up the skyyyyy!""
Flash Sentry spins again, backstepping towards the piano situated behind him towards the back of the room. He shimmies his hips and shoulder with each heel-slide, rubbing a naughty hand sensually across the impression his nipples make through his genocidally-tight "t-shirt."
"The music you were playing really blewwwwww my mind!"
The boi then props himself up atop the piano casing. He reclines, lazily slinking every "curve" of his body sideways, propping his chest forward as he dangles an exposed leg off the side, running a hand lustily up the knee and thigh while making love to the camera.
"It was love—oh-ohhhh!—at first sight, cuz—"
He hops off and lands on the floor, legs branched apart as he runs a free hand through a nonexistent head of hair, all the while practically fellating the mic.
"'BABY when I heard you for the first time I KNEW—"
Plink!
Silence and air conditioning again.
"So." Sunset leaned back in her stool, arms crossed as she stared at tablet—and the proverbial stripper with a midriff for weeks. "Girls." She cleared her throat. "Which of you forgot to tell Flash that the Rainbooms' Google Drive is accessible to everyone of us?"
"You're askin' us?" Applejack scratched her head, eyes still locked on Flash and his beautifully shaved armpits. "Yer the one who gave him password to our account."
"So he could share guitar tabs and song lyrics that he's been working on to help the band out," Sunset Shimmer said with a nod. "But where did he get the idea that he could use it for..." Her lips pursed and unpursed. "...personal files?"
"Who cares?" Rainbow Dash leaned in, reaching her finger for the tablet. "This is wicked awesome!"
"Bkkt—!" Sunset spat, lashing a hand and grabbing Rainbow's wrist. "You actually want to watch more of this?!"
"Of course I friggin' do!" Rainbow's eyes flared at her. "I wanna see if he dances through the whole dayum thing!"
"It's..." Twilight Sparkle coughed, her cheeks beet red. "...quite the workout."
"You went out with him once upon a time, darling," Rarity said, resting a dainty hand on Sunset's shoulder. The fashionista bore a growing smile that threatened to shatter her delicate features from the inside out. "Surely you've seen him at... his most embarrassing before."
"No. I really haven't."
"Too busy bullyin' him?" Applejack stated, eyebrow arched.
"... ... ..." Sunset wasted space with no response.
Licking her lips, Rainbow Dash slowly reached all the way forward and touched the screen again.
Sunset Shimmer breathlessly sunk her head into double palms.
Plink!
"Weeeeeeee were meant...
By now, Flash is crawled out onto the floor, pressing his chest to the tile and sticking his rear end up at an obscene forty-five degrees towards the ceiling... or perhaps a fantastic forty-five degrees. Depends on what side of the fence one is mowing.
"—tooooo be as onnnnnnnnne~~!!!"
He then twirls over and clutches the mic in two hands, eyes clenched shut as he bicycle-pedals both legs straight up into the air of the band room.
"MEANT TO BE AS ONNNNNNNEE!!!"
Aaaaaand Rainbow tapped the "-" volume button half-a-dozen times until the caterwauling lessened.
"Heh..." Rainbow smirked, leaning back. "Bruno Mars, he is not."
"Sounds to me he's fixin' to be more like a Brunhilda Venus,"
"It's Kylie Minogue," Rarity said.
Half of the girls looked at her. "Kylie who?"
"Kylie Minogue," Rarity repeated, lazily examining her nails. "From the album 'Fever'. Quite a peppy bit of work—proved that Kylie still had it."
"What year did that come out?" Twilight asked.
"2001."
"Land's sakes!" Applejack tilted her hat back. "That music's almost older than most of us!"
"Well..." Twilight's lips curled into a soft smile. "At least Flash is classy!"
Rarity's eyes followed his girlish, pelvic thrusts. "If you say so."
The group continued watching the technopop bacchanalia unfolding onscreen—all save for Sunset, that is... who continued breathing into her double-palms.
"He's good," Fluttershy finally said.
The other girls flashed her a blinking glance.
She looked back at them, features bright. "Well, he is!"
Rarity fanned herself. "She is not wrong."
Applejack squinted at the seamstress. "Uhhh—"
Rarity frowned back. "It's only that looking at her is wearing me out! That looks awfully sweaty!"
"Wait..." Rainbow squinted at Rarity. "What did you say?"
"I said that looking at Flash is wearing me—"
"No, that's not what you said."
"What..." Rarity's eyes fluttered as a redness spread through her upper body. "Er... what I mean was... I-I meant..." She gulped, fanning herself again before pointing at the tablet. "Can you quite blame me, darlings? Just feast your eyes!" her voice chirped.
"Okay..." Sunset mumbled into her hands. "...we don't need to do this."
"Just because he's being all slutty doesn't mean that it's 'girlish!'" Rainbow's voice cracked. "Get on board the twentieth-century train, Rarity!"
"Twenty-first," Twilight corrected.
"That too!" Rainbow pointed at the ipad. "So what if he... looks... sounds... and dr-dresses hotter than any chick I've seen on MTV..." Suddenly, she was fanning herself. "Daring Do on a bike, did he actually shave his bikini area???"
"I just found out today that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez isn't a new type of piano synthesizer!" Pinkie Pie smiled to the walls..
"But of course that—" Rarity grimaced at her. "For the love of lace, Pinkie?! What are you even doing here?!?"
"So... uhhhh..." Applejack scratched the back of his neck. "...do we tell him that we found this here vidya, or—?"
"Heck yeah!" Rainbow Dash grinned. "And we mail this tape along with his groovy ass straight to Logo TV!"
"You're a few years late on that one, darling," Rarity said.
"What?" Rainbow blinked. "Did they finally merge with BBC America?"
"We're not telling him a single thing," Sunset grunted through her digits.
"Awwwwwww!" Fluttershy pouted. "Why not? It may look strange on the surface, but he's obviously pouring his heart and soul into something expressive. And having pure, pure fun in the process! Shouldn't we support that?"
"What's to support?" Rainbow smirked. "Just look at his top! That dude's a size negative A." She raised a hand. "Can a girl relate? Huh? Huh?" Nobody high-fived her, and she hugged her slender chest with a winded smile. "Yeah... totally..."
Sunset finally lowered her hands and gazed tiredly across the band room. "I once over two years in the past ruining Flash's life." She shook her head. "I'm not about to risk ruining his reputation."
"Ain't you stretchin' it just a tad?" Applejack declared. "Like—who gives a flyin' hoot about reputation here at Canterlot High?" An errant moth zipped overhead. Startled, she ducked low before swatting wildly at it with her hat. "You just... give the world what you lurve and you enjoy yerself doin' it! Confound it! C'mere, you!"
"That might work for us, the magical mary sues of not-quite-but-almost-sparkly-unicorn-land... but this is Flash we're talking about!" Sunset flailed a wrist at the tablet. "I know him!"
"You sure, darling?" Rarity hummed.
The other girls laughed.
"Yes!" Sunset frowned. "I do! He's quiet! He's melancholic! He's sensitive!"
"He's circumcised," Twilight said, pointing at a particular shimmy on screen.
Sunset batted her hand away. "Point being!" She huffed, blushing profusely for a brief moment. "...it isn't very friendly to spring upon him the news that he's just been... exposed in his most private and carefree moments of... of..." She fondled the air in search of: "Liberal happiness!"
"There's another name for that, y'know," Rainbow said.
More giggles.
"Girls, please." Sunset sighed, turning to look sincerely at them. "We might all know a deeply-hidden and very expressive side of Flash Sentry now... but it still doesn't change the fact that he did not consent to our discovering it."
The girls exchanged glances, ultimately nodded.
"I do believe you have made a good point there, darling," Rarity said.
"I still think his life would be all the better if he just... opened up and expressed more," Fluttershy said.
Rainbow leaned in. "You just want to see him dance to ballet music."
"Mmmm..." Fluttershy cupped a rosy cheek, smiling. "You're not wrong."
"In a soft pink tutu too."
"Heeeeeeee..."
"If that's to be Flash's decision, let's let that be his decision to make... on his own time," Sunset insisted. "Trust me... Flash doesn't deal with soul-crushingly embarrassing revelations that well. Rational or not, it would destroy his feelings... and I-I don't want to cross that line ever again."
"Fair enough, sugarcube," Applejack said with a nod. "Reckon you knew him the best."
"Until today she did," Rainbow belched out the side of her mouth.
"Rainbow!" Fuming, Sunset spun on the stool to face her, then the group at large. "Girls. I need you all to promise me... that this video never leaves this room! Okay?" She held a hand up. "Pinkie Pie swear-it!"
"Duaaaaaaaaaaaaaah—" Pinkie Pie was Pac-Manning her mouth beneath the shadow of the flittering moth. She suddenly snapped out of it. "Oh yeah! That's me!" She raised her hand. "Cross my heart, hope to fly—"
"—stick a cupcake in my eye!" the rest of the girls chanted in unison, their hands held out high like an alt-right rally in drag.
"Good..." Sunset Shimmer lowered her hand, breathing easier. "Now..." She smiled sweetly at her friends. "Let's delete this video from the Drive account and pretend that it never happened. Got it?"
"Got it!"
"Got it!"
"Got it!"