Sunset had absolutely no clue how to begin, specifically because she had no idea how long she had left. As the dreamscape seemed to swell and shift around her, she desperately wracked her brain for a suitable starting point. If she began with Anon-a-miss, Twilight would initially get caught up in the bullying and drama aspect. Should Sunset be unable to explain herself fully, Twilight may do something entirely rash, like marching through the portal seeking revenge. Sunset felt her stomach knot up at the thought of Twilight trying to—
“Sunset...?”
She looked up, her racing thoughts interrupted. Twilight stared at her, concern weighing heavily on her face.
“Sunset, you have to talk to me. I can’t help if I don’t know what the problem is,” Twilight said.
“No one can help me, Twilight,” Sunset said, her face obscured by her long hair. “That’s... That’s why I needed to see you.”
Twilight knelt down beside her. “What do you mean?”
“I...” Sunset crossed her arms and curled up, burying her face in her gown. A rush of anguish shot through her, seemingly out of nowhere. “I don’t know! I don’t know what’s important, and I should have told you about all this stuff a long time ago when I had the chance and I didn’t and now I don’t—!”
“Listen to me, Sunset,” Twilight said, interrupting her. “It’s okay. We haven’t talked through the journal, but we’re talking now, see?” Sunset felt an arm wrap tenderly around her. “Just start from the beginning, alright?”
Sunset leaned into Twilight, taking several long, drawn out breaths. Within the warmth of her last friend’s embrace, Sunset found a sense of tranquil contentment that had evaded her for longer than she could remember.
“Okay,” she said. “Okay. So, things haven’t been going very well in my world.”
“I gathered that much,” Twilight said.
“Yeah... It’s worse than you think,” Sunset said. “So, there’s this website the students at CHS were using. On the computer. Oh, uhm... You remember how the computers work, right?”
“Of course,” Twilight said. “And a website is like a book page that anyone can see from any computer.”
“Yeah, exactly. Okay, so there’s this website, and there were posts going up revealing embarrassing secrets of students at CHS, including Applejack, Rainbow Dash and the other girls.”
“That’s awful!” Twilight said.
“Yeah, well...” Sunset sighed. “They all thought it was me.”
“What?”
Sunset felt Twilight tense up briefly.
“Yeah,” Sunset said. “And no matter how much I begged and cried and pleaded with them to believe that it wasn’t me, they refused. At first I was mad about it, but seeing how I used to act... I dunno. I can’t really blame them.”
“I can!” Twilight shouted, just a little too loud. Sunset winced as her headache took the opportunity to return.
“Nnngh... Twilight, please,” Sunset groaned.
“Sorry, sorry,” Twilight said. “But seriously! How could they do that? After everything you did to turn your life around!”
“It really doesn’t matter,” Sunset said, trying to relax again. “It was going to happen eventually, Twilight. After all the years I spent hurting them and driving them apart, there was no chance for me to earn their trust fully.” She glanced over to see Twilight’s fuming face. “If it hadn’t been this, it would have been something else.”
“I don’t think that’s true, Sunset,” Twilight said.
“Well, either way, without them I was pretty lost,” Sunset said. “At first I thought it was no big deal. After all, I’d survived by myself in this world for years, so I figured I’d be fine. But...”
“You didn’t want to,” Twilight finished for her.
“Y-yeah. I was only able to last so long on my own because, I dunno...” Sunset paused, thinking about how to describe it. “I guess I built up this callous shell around myself. I wasn’t concerned with being alone because I was so sure that I was better than everyone else anyways. But once you showed me that I could have a better life, there was no way I could ever go back to how I was before. But I couldn’t have that better life, because my friends wouldn’t listen.”
“Then we need to make them listen!” Twilight exclaimed, jumping up. “I’ll head through the portal and together we’ll talk some sense into them.”
“No, Twilight...” Sunset spoke softly. “It’s too late for that.”
“What?” Twilight looked at her, confused. “What do you mean?”
A shudder ran through Sunset’s body as she tried to respond. “Twilight, I-I... After a few weeks of nobody believing me, things started to get worse. People would send me really, really hateful messages and threats all day, every day. I couldn’t keep going to school, and I’d left our journal in my locker and I was too scared to go get it. I just stayed in my apartment, and... I didn’t leave for a long, long time. It was just me trapped with my own thoughts.”
“Oh, Sunset...” Twilight sat back down and pulled Sunset close again. “It must have been so awful.”
Even as Twilight held her, Sunset felt completely frozen over. She looked at her arm—smooth as it was in this ethereal place—and mentally steeled herself for what was to come.
“I hurt myself,” Sunset said. She was surprised by the bluntness of her words, as was Twilight, who pulled out of the embrace to look at her. Her violet eyes were a mess of confusion and concern.
“What do you mean?” Twilight said, barely above a whisper. “What did you do...?”
Sunset turned her head, unable to meet Twilight’s gaze any longer. “I used a razor to, uhm... To hurt myself. I’d done it a few times before this, actually. But I started to do it every day.”
Out of the corner of her vision, Sunset could see Twilight was trembling a bit. She cursed herself for bringing that detail up at all. Honestly, this whole thing was seeming like more and more of a terrible idea. And yet, she continued.
“Before you ask, I don’t really know why. It was a routine, I guess,” Sunset said. “And every day that it played out, my world got a little smaller and dimmer, until I only ever left my apartment a few nights a week to find something to eat. Which, uh, leads into why I needed to see you...”
Sunset braved a glance at Twilight. Her friend said nothing, leaning forward as if to hear Sunset a little better. The painful, rhythmic thump of Sunset’s heart in her ears was lost beneath the impossibly soft whimpering escaping Twilight’s lips.
“So, I ran into Rainbow Dash and Rarity,” Sunset kept talking, closing her eyes so she wouldn’t have to see Twilight’s tears. “And of course, they still thought I was posting their secrets online, so it didn’t go well. And I was really, really upset.” She paused, taking a few deep breaths. When she opened her eyes again, they were watering. “It felt like there was no way out, like I was trapped in a nightmare where everyone despised me for something I didn’t do. Every day it got worse, and I lost my friends and I had no one to turn t-to and I was so, so tired...”
Sunset saw Twilight’s expression transform from concern to despair as the realization dawned on her.
“Sunset...” Twilight breathed. “You didn’t...”
“I-I... Twilight, I’m sorry, you gave me chance to start over and I—”
Sunset’s words were cut off as Twilight nearly collapsed into her. Tears stung her eyes as Sunset felt her friend’s entire body shudder with sobs. Then, as Sunset had dreaded, questions started to pour out as well.
“Why didn’t you reach out to me?” Twilight cried.
“Twilight...”
“Why didn’t you tell me about any of this sooner? Sunset, I could have helped you!”
“Please, T-Twilight...”
“Tell me exactly what happened! Are you okay? Where are you now?”
Sunset drifted forward as a wave of dizziness passed through her, and she felt Twilight place her hands on her shoulders to steady her. “Nnnngh... I jumped off a building,” she said. “It was a really long way down.”
“Sunset, why would you do that?” Twilight kept shouting. Sunset could hardly blame her, but the volume was making her head hurt even more.
“I don’t know. I was tired... I was ready,” Sunset said, looking away.
“Sunset, look at me.” Twilight tilted Sunset’s head up. “You have to tell me exactly where you are right now. I’m can be there in—”
“No, Twilight!” Sunset suddenly shouted. Twilight was unfazed, even as Sunset continued. “No. I don’t want you to come through the portal. I didn’t want to see you to ask for help. There’s nothing anyone could do that would help me anyway.”
Twilight threw her hands up. “You can’t expect me to do nothing! You tried to kill yourself!”
“Please, just... Stay here. Stay with me.” Sunset choked up, the pain in her chest flaring. “I d-don’t want to be alone when it happens.”
Twilight looked as if she’d been asked a riddle. “When what happens?”
“Y’know, when it’s...” Sunset trailed off. “When it’s time for me to go.”
Twilight’s eyes widened. “No,” she said plainly, as if she were reciting a fact. “No. Sunset, you don’t get to go. I won’t let you.”
“I know you want to save me, Twilight. You want to save everyone. It’s what makes you so wonderful,” Sunset said, giving her friend a weak smile. “But with me... With me, there's nothing left to save.”
“Stop saying things like that!” Twilight cried.
“It’s okay, Twilight, really. I was able to see myself in the hospital, and I know I don’t have much time left,” Sunset said with a sigh. “If I’m being honest, I’ve known my life was going to end this way for a long time. Long before I met you, or even before I went through the portal. Maybe it’s my curse for turning my back on Celestia.”
Twilight kept crying. “Sunset, I’m not just going to sit here and watch you die!”
“I appreciate it, Twilight,” Sunset said. “I know you mean well. But it’s not like you can just drag me back to Equestria. Celestia would—”
“Forget about Celestia!” Twilight screamed.
Sunset stopped. “W-what?”
“Forget about her! And forget about the friends in your world who abandoned you!” Twilight’s voice was shaking. “You don’t need them, Sunset! If they made you hate living so much that you tried to kill yourself, then you’re better off without them!”
Sunset was absolutely stunned. “Twilight, that’s Princess Celestia you’re talking about...”
“I don’t care!” Twilight said. “She’s been the most wonderful mentor to me, but clearly she did not do the same for you, so you don’t need her! And those girls who look like my friends and have their names are not the same as my friends! And you don’t need them either!”
Sunset had never seen this side of Twilight before. She wondered if Twilight had, either. “Indignation isn’t enough for me to have a life worth living,” she said.
“Then we’ll figure out what is!” Twilight said. “I’m going to come over there, and you’re going to recover, and I’m going to stay in that world with you as long as you need.”
“I could never ask you to do that,” Sunset said.
“You don’t have to, Sunset! That’s what being friends is all about!” Twilight said. “And quite frankly, I’m going to do so whether you want me to or not.”
Sunset’s mind was suddenly buzzing. Everything Twilight had just said had been like a shock to her system, zapping away at her apathy. Maybe this could work. Maybe Twilight was right. Through her head throbbing, her ears ringing and her limbs aching, Sunset felt a slight twinge of hope.
“Sunset, you have to tell me where you are,” Twilight said.
“I-I... I’m in the hospital,” Sunset said. “I don’t know where it is exactly. It’s the only one in the whole city, though.”
“Okay. When we’re done talking, I’m going to go through the portal to find you,” Twilight said.
A smile tugged at Sunset’s lips, and she closed her eyes. Twilight would come find her. Together, they’d figure things out. “Y-yeah,” she said. “I’d like that.”
“It’s going to be alright, Sunset. I need you to believe that.” Twilight’s voice seemed to soften as she spoke. “I need you to tell me you...”
“What?” Sunset opened her eyes. Twilight was still next to her, though she was a little blurry. Sunset could see that her mouth was moving, but the words were muffled, as if she were underwater. Whatever she was saying was made even harder to understand by the ringing in Sunset’s ears.
“Sunset...Tell me... Alright.”
Sunset put her hands over her ears. The ringing was getting louder, so much so that it wasn’t even a ringing anymore. A single long tone sounded in her ears.
“Sunset...? What....?”
Her breaths came faster. Her chest hurt. It hurt worse than it ever had before. The edges of her vision grew darker and darker, until all she could see was the vague shape of a purple girl in front of her. Something grabbed her shoulders, and she heard a voice crying out. Through it all, the tone echoed.
“...No!”
What? Sunset couldn’t hear. Who was shaking her? She was so cold...
“...Sunset!”
The purple girl. She was crying. Why was she crying?
Whatever was happening, Sunset was ready for it to be over. She was really, really tired.
The purple girl was too bright, like a light too close to her face. The voice kept screaming.
It was too loud. Too bright. She needed everything to stop.
Sunset closed her eyes, and passed on.