//------------------------------// // Still Alive // Story: Unrequited // by DaydreamsOfAStranger //------------------------------// Marble Pie wasn’t expecting it. She should have, obviously she should have, but she still didn’t. Even if she had been warned, warned about all the pain and loss, she wouldn’t have. It didn’t seem possible. Big Mac was in the next room, muzzle to muzzle with Sugar Belle, with that happy slip of a smile she’d seen before. Noses crushed together, her nose, his nose... Her heart crushed like the remainders of an abandoned quarry. Her heart brittle and crumbling, a fragile little thing that beat only for her family and him, simply stopped, dropping like a cold stone in her stomach. Scarcely able to hide her grimace, she backed behind a wall, eyes squinting to prevent tears. Even if it proved entirely futile, and they came pouring down in a flood. She wanted to scream, but all she could do was cry and think. She’d known about Sugar Belle. She even knew that they were dating. And most importantly she knew he was happy; he’d told her himself in his letters to her. Yet, for some reason seeing them first hoof... All smiley and blushing... It hurt. It hurt so badly. But she couldn’t let it show. She didn’t want him or her sisters worrying. So she bit her quivering lip and told herself it wasn’t that big of a deal. Her little crush on him was just a little crush. And if that feeling was unrequited, then it was fine. She could handle it. She was a big pony now. Marble stifled a sob. But it wasn’t fine! She couldn’t pretend it ever would be! It never would, it never would, because he was hers now, he was Sugar Belle’s. Not Marble Pie’s. Never hers. He never would be. She had to cup a hoof over her mouth, sit on her haunches and weep. Weep for the loss she wasn’t expecting but should have expected. But she couldn’t do that. To sit and weep there, it would bring up uncomfortable questions, questions she didn’t think she could ever answer. The pain would be too great, her mind would split. So Marble stood still. Bit her tongue until it bled until the iron taste in her mouth was all she knew. Then, channeling her inner Maud, she stiffened her lip, wiped her face of tears and reentered the room behind them. The Apples and Pies were all exchanging gifts with one another, those happy wonderful smiles on everyone’s faces. Pinkie was busily being Pinkie with her holiday grin and cheerful singing. Pinkie’s friend, Applejack, was tendering a hoof written card with a fond look on her features. Marble’s other two sisters, Maud Pie, and Lime Stone Pie, were idly chatting, while Granny Smith and Marble’s mother compared recipes. And then, there was a Big Mac and Sugar Belle. Marble promised herself then and there that she would face the entire day with a smile, even though her stomach was in knots, and her mind in shambles. She would make it through this, she would overcome it. At least that’s what would have happened if Marble wasn’t such a little foal. She took one look at them, them and their sweet love, them and their happiness, her and her stallion, him and his mare, and ran. She turned tail and galloped through the hall to the door. She opened it, like her aching heart itself had been wrenched open, and then slammed it, with power enough to break it from its hinges, splinter it into a fine powder, powerful enough to shatter a mountain. Through the snow, Marble ran faster than she thought possible, white flecks catching in her coat, melting from the heat of her fur. Her face was so hot she could feel the snow melting down her face and into her eyes. Distantly, she could hear voices yelling out after her, but the heavy pounding of her heart in her ears drown them out. She ran into the orchard, ran past tree after tree, bare of their leaves, covered in pristine white snow, but didn’t stop to notice them. She just ran. Until the adrenaline worn off, until suddenly Marble collapsed in the snow, eyes screwed shut, sobbing, hooves over her mouth, screaming, panting, yelling for everything to just make sense. And suddenly, all she felt was a wave of intense anger. She kicked and swore to Celestia, pounded her hooves into the snow until they were numb from the cold. Sugar Belle had stolen him! Big Mac was meant to be hers, they met before he even knew Sugar Belle existed! Sugar Belle was going to hurt him, break his heart. She was the reason everything was so wrong. Why she was out in the snow, numb, wet, and alone. If only she’d said something earlier about how she felt. If only she’d known- “Marble! What in tarnation was that all about?” The stern southern twang that belonged only to an Apple broke her thought, then another voice came too. “Marble, you silly filly, you broke the door! You should’ve been more careful with it! Now your face is all scratched up!” It was her sister, Pinkie. Marble opened an eye, though it was still blurry with her tears, and confirmed that both Pinkie and Applejack were the ones speaking to her. Pinkie Pie, who looked more like a cotton candy blur than a mare through her watery eyes, held out what she assumed to be a hoof. Marble took it hesitantly, climbing to her hooves with a waver. And was surprised by Pinkie’s hug. It was warm, and she smelt like gingerbread and frosting, and it was tight and secure in her embrace. It only held for a minute, before Pinkie let go, but its effects were felt immediately. “Now then, am Ah gonna get an answer? What in Equestria just happened back there?” Marble just looked ashamed with her ears laid back and her eyes downcast. She could only hang her head and grimace, not able to meet Applejack’s eyes. Pinkie Pie, ever the amazing sibling and confidant, gently rubbed Marble’s back. “Mm. I- oh I’m such a terrible pony... I’m so sorry about your door.” Marble whimpered. Though it was barely audible, the look of surprise Applejack gave was evidence enough she heard it clearly. Applejack backpedaled, eyebrows furrowed as she stepped forward, “Oh- oh golly, Ah’m not mad at you, Marble, just worried. When Ah saw you run outta the house Ah was plum confused, then the racket with the door, and Ah saw ya running through that snow like some madmare was out to get ya...” “Ya! Wow, did you sure run fast! You were like-” Pinkie rushed past Applejack, then mimicked bucking through a door, “-and then-” she went so quickly, it was hard to see that Pinkie had run to the barn and back, “-that, and then you were all-” she kicked around in the snow, with a scrunched up angry look on her face, before she popped to her hooves as something seemed to strike her. “Ohhh, I know what this is about!” Marble cringed, hoping Pinkie would have the restraint to hold back on telling her secret. “But, I’ll let you explain if you want? I did Pinkie Promise.” Marble was somewhat stunned by Pinkie’s offer, but due to a “Pinkie Promise” she would have an option. Yet, her nervousness, combined with a still staggeringly large amount of guilt, won out in the end. She shook her head, and let Pinkie do the talking. “See, ever since last Hearth’s warming, when you and your family came to the rock farm, Marble’s had a BIG crush on Big Mac! And I bet seeing him with Sugar Belle wasn’t too nice, right Marble?” Marble blushed, hid behind her mane and hummed, “Mhm.” Applejack smiled sympathetically, and sat down next to Marble, prompting both Pinkie and Marble to sit as well. “Well, now. I suppose if something like that happened Ah’d be a bit emotional too, Marble. Ah’m powerful sorry this all happened, but Ah really wish ya had said somthin’, instead of running off like that.” Marble nodded weakly, a few tears dripping down her cheeks into the snow, which did not go unnoticed by Applejack. “Now, now, sugarcube. No need to cry. Golly, Ah’m sorry if Ah’m sounding a bit harsh, but Ah’m just worried. Ah mean, we’re family, so we all gotta look out for each other. Big Mac is mah brother, after all, and Ah want to help if Ah can, okay?” “Mhm.” “Ah think maybe you should talk out yer thoughts, sugarcube. It might make ya feel a might bit better,” Applejack smiled, patting her back, “Ah’m all ears.” “And so am I!” Pinkie agreed, tipping her ears toward Marble with her hooves. Marble took a soft, shuttering sigh. “I shouldn’t be so upset about this. I- it’s silly. It really doesn’t matter. It’s just a crush, it shouldn’t- it shouldn’t hurt this much. I-” she stopped, unable to convince herself to say anything more. It was just silly. It didn’t matter. “Marble, there’s nothing silly about it. Seeing how you reacted like that, Ah’d say it’s a might bit more than a crush. Ah think you fell in love.” Marble was quiet. “And when Big Mac and Sugar Belle became special someponies, it broke yer heart. And now yer scared, cause ya’ll have no idea how yer gonna face Big Mac after all this. Yer angry, too, maybe at Sugar Belle, maybe at Big Mac, but definitely at yerself.” Marble nodded, her voice croaking a bit, “It’s not fair.” Pinkie chimed in an uncharacteristically soft voice, “Of course it isn’t, but sometimes you just gotta grin and bear it. Maybe things didn’t go your way, but it’s not the end of the world, silly. You're still alive, arn’t ya?” Applejack hummed in agreement. “Yer grieving, Marble, is all. And it may take some time to accept things, but please remember yer family loves you and we want to help. So don’t be a stranger, ya hear? Plus,” Applejack put a hoof on Marble’s back, “Ah know Big Mac real well, Marble. Wouldn’t be much of a sister if Ah didn’t. And Ah know he would’ve never broken yer heart if he knew. He likes ya a whole lot, Marble. Yer one of his best friends.” Marble sniffled, rubbing her face with a hoof. “I- I know. He even told me about Sugar Belle. And I was- I thought I was happy for them. I- I really, really want to be, but it still hurts. I’m such a terrible pony...” “Marble, you’re one of my bestest sisters ever. You’re still trying to be happy for them and you still care about Big Mac! You’re not a terrible pony at all!” Marble let the tiniest slip of a smile onto her muzzle. Maybe Pinkie and Applejack were right. She brushed her mane from her face and looked up at her sister and cousin. Applejack and Pinkie both smiled back. Then, with a grunt, Applejack stood up, and looked at Marble, “Golly, that cut doesn’t look none too good, sugarcube. Maybe we should get ya back inside and look at it, so it doesn’t get infected?” She cupped a hoof by her mouth and whispered, “And Ah’m sure Pinkie is dying to give ya yer present, too.” Marble giggled, and both she and Pinkie stood as well, and then they all went back to the house, all with a little more understanding.