It happened.
It finally happened.
In a world of insane and goofy talking mythical cash grabs...
YOU'RE BORED.
Yes, for all the crazy shenanigans you and your friends get into on a weekly basis, the dark forces of boredom have tracked you down and decided to fuck with you. Right now you, Spike and the girls are lazing about in the crystal map room contemplating the day's potential activities.
"Is there any special events today?" you ask.
"None that we know of." Twilight shrugs.
"Any parties you got planned, Pinkie?"
"I already am, Nonny! It's a Boring Party!" she exclaims.
"No team building exercise at the school?"
'Fraid not Anon." AJ inserts.
"No friendship missions?"
Fluttershy and Rarity shake their heads.
"In a racing mood, Dashie?"
"Even I need a break from racing Anon." RD states. "Plus my wings are kinda tense at the moment."
"Eh, the more ya know I guess."
"And knowing is half the battle!" Pinkie inserts.
"Star?"
"Can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm Dragon Pit'd out." Starlight huffs.
You gasp. "Well....don't any of you have SOME kind of game we could use?"
"I got cards, Nonny. Wanna play that?"
"Ugh, I'm not the best at card games except....except...."
That lone rusty cog in the back of your mind finally clicks as you get an idea. "I'll be right back."
You zigzag through the hallways Temple Run style, grabbing TONS of paper and crayons and sketching at top speed as you return to the map room. Slamming the large stack in the center of the table, you pass out seven sheets to each pony/dragon/Deadpool's waifu.
"What's all this about, Anonymous?" Rarity asks.
"I call it....UNO!"
Everyone looks at their deck of cards quite quizzically.
"Games of human culture, how fun!" Twilight squeaks. "How do you play?"
"Well, first off, you don't take notes while playing the game." you say, snatching the floating notepad and quill out of the nerd's magical grip.
"Now the rules are simple-"
As you turn around, you hear a faint sound of something being scribbled on. You sigh and continue.
Later...
After a painstakingly long time explaining the basics of the game, thanks to Pinkie's constant questions, you finally sit down and got the show on the road.
"Now are we clear on everything?" you ask.
Everyone nods in agreement.
"Alright. AJ, you're up first."
The farm pony tosses a yellow three at the center. For fingerless creatures, these ponies sure could carry a deck. Everything seemed to go smoothly, all stacking card after card and the others were getting a pretty good kick out of it.
But then, everything changed when the pink one attacked.
"Ha! Gotcha Rarity!"
You knew it was coming eventually, and it indeed has. Pinkie...dropped a blue +2 on Rarity.
"Oh. It. Is. ON!!!" she hisses.
The 'generous' mare pulls a +2 and sends the combo over to AJ seething with competitive rage.
"Ya must be plumb crazy if ya think ya can do that Rarity."
"Don't be silly, of course I can. Anon said it himself, isn't that right?"
"Uhhh..." you utter.
That anger must've been contagious because the salty effect passed on to the redorangeneck as she slams ANOTHER +2, creating a +6!
And so it went on, all of you passing draw two's around and around. You really did suck at shuffling cards. Soon, you all slap down a card and hollered a-
"UNO!"
"UNO!"
"UNO!"
"UNO!"
"UNO!"
"UNO!"
"UNO!"
"DOS! I-I mean UNO!"
A +38 has accumulated from your aggressive onslaught. Then, it all fell to poor old Fluttershy, who hangs her head in defeat.
"It's alright, Flutters." you assure. "It's just a game."
"Oh dear," she squeaks. "I can't believe you all would do such a thing!"
She slaps a +2. "To Anon. UNO, out."
Your jaw hits the floor as the room is filled with collective 'ooooh's' and Starlight levitates 40 cards into your deck.
Saltiness levels rising.
"I-I..."
The pegasus gives you an innocent smile.
"It doesn't matter. I'm not competitive, you guys. I'm not."
"Yeah, suuure Anon." Rainbow says.
"Whatever. I'll come back on top. I'm not competitive."
RD places her last card: a blue +2.
Once again, everyone tosses their last card, surprisingly ALL +2's, one by one yelling "UNO!" as it comes right back to you. You could practically scratch the salt flakes off your skin as Pinkie throws the last card.
"UNO! You lose Nonny!"
The pile of cards bury you from the waist up as your 'good' friends snicker at your failure. Suddenly, Spike flies towards your card-covered face.
"Hey....you mad, bro?" he chuckles.
"Eeeeeeeeee, let's play it again!
You facepalm in regret.