Sassy awoke with discomfort that soon manifested as a groggy sense of regret about not taking off her armor before settling in to read. She pushed herself up from where she’d slumped over at her office desk, and felt the dull pain of leather straps that had dug into her barrel, numbing it in places. She shivered as the new rush of blood restored pinpricks of feeling.
Pangs of hunger soon followed. Sassy frowned at the books she’d been leafing through, silently blaming titles such as A Brief History of Tartarus and Perspectives on the Zebraic Tribes for putting her to sleep. She rifled through a few more in the hopes of finding something less dry and historical, and was less than thrilled to find Tirek the Devourer and Discord Unchained, before discovering 250 Ways to Pleasure Mares and Stallions: An Illustrated Guide.
Sassy held the latter up in her magic, and crinkled her muzzle, reflecting that perhaps the Governor’s interests hadn’t entirely changed. She then moved the book toward the trash can… before pausing, bringing it back closer, and taking a small peek.
How scandalous, she thought, before sliding it into one of her own bags. After all, if he wanted to get rid of it…
Sassy glanced up at the clock and frowned as she noted the time. She stood up slowly from her chair, crossed to the chamber door, and opened it. A slender figure with closed eyes stood propped up against the wall, next to one of the guards flanking her door.
“Silver Shill?”
The stallion jerked awake, but quickly composed himself. “Yes, Overseer?”
“Seneschal Rarity should’ve joined us quite some time ago. Has she?”
Silver Shill frowned. “I don’t think so, ma’am; at least not unless she’s just arrived. I haven’t heard any news about her, either way.”
Sassy’s muzzle pulled tight. “Very well. I suppose I shall return to my work. In the meanwhile, though, I am ready for my supper.”
“Oh, of course!” Silver Shill bent to the ground and picked up a covered tray. “Seneschal Fashion Plate had supper sent up for you a bit ago, but I thought it best to let you… rest your eyes at the time.”
Sassy lit her horn and took the tray in her magic. “Your thoughtfulness is appreciated, as is Plate’s. But I grow concerned about Rarity’s failure to join us. Ask around for any news, and see if she might’ve turned up.”
Silver Shill bowed, then retreated quickly. It made Sassy smile to see such eager service, and it made her wonder if it might be possible to poach him from the Governor. But with hunger to be sated, Sassy returned to the room, raising the lid off the tray—
Her breath caught as she regarded a veritable cornucopia of fresh, crisp-looking, sliced vegetables on one side, with an agreeable selection of crackers and cheese on the other. It was heavily stocked with peppers, tomatoes, and daisies—all personal favorites of hers from before. She drew back from the tray, looking at it with widened eyes. “I might’ve thought nothing of such a spread before this investigation began,” she whispered. “Oh Plate, don’t tell me you’re caught up in this as well…”
But as moments passed, Sassy’s eyes were drawn to a particularly tempting-looking slice of yellow bell pepper, whose bumpy inner membrane caught the light of Sassy’s horn in a way that accentuated the promise of flavorful delight.
In the end, temptation won; Sassy popped the slice into her mouth, allowing the pepper’s dazzlingly sweet but slightly bitter flavor to overwhelm her thoughts with sheer sensation. Then, as the moment passed, she moved onto eating a wedge of pale cheese whose savory smokiness made her tremble.
Several minutes into Sassy’s meal, she noticed something thin and white that had been hidden underneath a delectable daisy. She frowned, gripped it in her magic, and slowly teased it out from below the rest of the food.
It was a piece of paper. “I'm ready to talk,” she read aloud. The note wasn’t signed, but she recognized the writing.
Sassy ate her fill before cracking the door and peering out into the hall. The guards on either side raised their eyebrows at her
“One of you shall lead me to the office of the Governor’s Seneschal,” she ordered.
“Of course, ma’am,” one said. “It’s down near the kitchens.”
“Not one for subtlety, are you, Plate,” she muttered.
Together with her escort, Sassy traversed what felt like half the length and breadth of the mansion. They passed by the ballroom, which still seemed to be keeping a small army of ponies busy with cleaning, organizing, or decorating. They continued down the long, grand halls, eventually reaching a large metal door that led to the kitchen. Ponies ducked past them with hushed apologies before pushing through the door. The sounds of clinking dishes and shouting voices further reinforced the inevitability of the ball that Blueblood was planning in “honor” of Sassy and Rarity.
But a ways down from the kitchen door was another that had been intricately carved from red wood, with a silver circle hanging at eye level. As Sassy approached it, she saw it was actually a small image of a plate.
She raised a hoof and knocked.
After a few moments of near-silence, the door swung inward, and Fashion Plate burst outward with a broad grin. “Sassy! Fillyfriend! What’s the word?”
“Do you have company?” she asked, craning her neck to look past him into the room.
“Psssh, no.” He glanced at the guard. It was quick, but Sassy noticed it. “So hey, you got some time? How ’bout we go knock off and see if a couple of busy ponies can score a three-martini lunch somewhere?”
Sassy furrowed her brow, but eventually nodded. “All right, maybe just some water though.” Then she waved a hoof at the guard. “Go on, back to my office. I’m sure I won’t be long.”
Fashion Plate slung a foreleg around Sassy’s neck and pulled her into a slow walk that he managed on three legs, leading her back down the main hall. “What took you so long?” he asked in hushed tones, devoid of his usual flamboyance. “I have been freaking out down here ever since I found out what you were doing in town!”
Sassy frowned. “From the moment I saw you earlier, I’ve been hoping that you wouldn’t have any connections to this mess.”
“I know. And that’s why I wanted to step forward right away.” He placed his hoof back down on the floor, helping him walk; Sassy’s frown deepened at the loss of its pressure against her coat. “I don’t want either me or the Governor to lose our heads for this. I may as well have died after the Mistress changed our world, for how little I got to create until I got this job.”
Sassy leaned closer. “Lord Rich is your supplier, isn’t he? I’ve known for years that he has illicit connections… everypony seems to. But what I haven’t had is proof. Every time I’ve gotten close to finding something solid, it’s like what I’m looking for just disappears!”
Plate glanced around them, eventually appearing satisfied with the distance between them and any of the nearest servants. “I don’t know for sure. I’m not into the details, you understand? I just inherited some contacts from the last guy doing this, and I… I like to have nice meals. Is that so wrong? Just because I can live on mosses and mushrooms doesn’t mean I can make culinary art with them.”
“Who was the ‘last guy?’”
Sweat beaded at Fashion Plate’s brow. “When I say that, I mean Blueblood himself used to keep track of most of the transactions. From what I heard, it was only in the last year or so that he started, ah… shifting focus. Actually, your little helper Silver Shill was picking up most of the slack until Blueblood decided to bring me on full-time.”
“I take it he was focused on his research into Tartarus and suchlike?” Sassy raised an eyebrow. “Do you know anything about those interests, as well?”
“Not much, though I do know that it’s been a long time since he’s had a proper debauch.” He glanced at her, coughed, and cleared his throat. “I mean, y’know. Silver Shill used to tell me about having to shoo whole herds of working-fillies out of here, or helping hold off some jealous husband or wife.”
“Prince Blueblood has become celibate?” Sassy failed to keep the incredulity from her voice.
“Oh no, nonono. His idea of a quiet evening in still makes my old party days look like a footnote. I’m just saying he’s a far cry from the one-pony whorehouse that he used to be.”
“As if he’s not himself…” Sassy looked down, meeting Plate’s eyes. “Do you think he’s being pressured or controlled by some outside party? He’s mentioned having some kind of ‘lady-in-waiting.’”
Plate shrugged. “Not that he’s told me. Not that I’d know, one way or the other. But I know you from way back, Sassy; I know you’re not going to stop until you’ve put a pin in every detail. I just figured it was better to put one in myself before you ended up doing it for me.”
“I will. I have to. Things have changed, Plate; I need to know if everything I’ve worked for these last few years still makes sense or not.”
His eyebrows climbed. “Hold on, when you say everything, do you mean everything-everything?”
“I mean…” Sassy felt a jolt of panic at having possibly gone too far.
“You mean you’re finally gonna let yourself get knocked-up so you can quit your job and chase foals around?”
She snorted, then turned and slugged his shoulder hard enough to make him say: “Ow! You bitch!”
“You had that coming,” she said with a smile.
He stuck his tongue out at her. “Well, that’s what you get for going all serious on me when I’m already trying to do the big confession thing. But since you started…?”
Sassy’s ears turned down, and her head slumped a little lower. “I shouldn’t say more if you’re already connected to this, however tangentially. I fear this is mine to bear, and mine alone.”
“Well what’s the point of having friends, or even a good job, if you don’t have somepony you can talk to? I know we kinda lost touch for a while there, but it’s not… it wasn’t you. I wasn’t in a good place before this job happened. Truth is, most days I find it easier to organize and put events together than to pick up a pen and write. But back when I couldn’t do the one thing, it took more will than I had to do the other, too.”
“I understand.” She nodded, then narrowed her eyes. “You will, of course, not repeat any of this to anypony else?”
“My lips are sealed!”
Sassy glanced into a room where a chambermaid was standing on her hind legs and flipping a comforter out onto a bed. Other than her, nopony else was nearby. “Recently I’ve had a few surprises, and a few disappointments, and they’ve left me feeling shaky, for lack of a better word.”
“So it’s not just your biological clock ticking?” Plate gave Sassy a broad wink. “Because I seriously do know some guys who might be willing to help, but for the most part they’re not gonna be your type.”
She smiled at him. “Plate, that’s something that I’ve always admired about you: you’re just… out there. You’re yourself. What you see is what you get.”
“Well, what’s the point of being anything else?”
“No, I agree. It just seems like other ponies don’t do that. A surprising amount of ponies, and in all kinds of positions.”
He looked at her intently for a moment. “Someone close to you?”
She nodded silently.
He touched a hoof to her shoulder, gently nudging her to stop. “You don’t need me to come beat them up, do you?!” With that, he rose on his hind legs and flexed his forelegs in a parody of a muscle-bound display.
Sassy snickered, then reached out and pulled him into a tight hug.
“Whoa, whoa! Inappropriate touching!”
She burst into laughter again, and hugged him tighter.
“Oh, come on!” he added. “As if I had any idea back in the day that helping you get on your hooves again after running a couple of boutiques into the ground would lead me to this kind of end!”
Sassy grimaced, and pulled away. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to overstep. It just… feels good, seeing an old friend right now.”
“No, Sassy, it’s fine. What were you saying about this pony you need to have beat up?”
“I don’t think there’s a pony in Equestria who could… beat up the one who disappointed me recently. I don’t even know how to talk about it without betraying my own standards… and yet, I know not talking about it puts me on the wrong end of those anyway. It’s a quandary, Plate, and I don’t know how to face it.”
“Listen. Sassy. How many things are you good at in life? I’m thinking the number’s pretty small—”
“Oh, definitely, thank you.”
“—but right there, at the top of the list, is facing things that suck, and not sugarcoating the fact that they suck. Then you crack the whip and figure out how to use the ponies you’ve got to make ’em suck less. Because that’s you!”
“I’m glad for the vote of confidence. I can use it right now. I just… I hate the thought that all this might not be worth it. Ponies have kept doing what they wanted without regard to the Mistress’ laws, or without thinking about the consequences of provoking her wrath. Ponies like Lord Rich sow disorder, chaos… and there’s nothing I hate more.”
Fashion Plate tsked. “Well, I’ll tell you what: if you really want bring order to something, you might want to start with a big box full of old receipts and shipping manifests that I found stuffed in a corner of Blueblood’s office a while back. There’s bound to be something useful for your investigation in there. As for me, I don’t have any clue who’s fulfilling our food orders; I’m just using what was here before I started, and to my unending amazement, it works.”
Sassy nodded. “I suppose the temptation to ignorance would be hard to resist, but as I said, I’m taking this as far as it goes. Of course, if you can help me find some truly damning evidence about either Lord Rich or his associates, there’s no reason why we couldn’t discuss clemency—”
Loud hoofsteps approached them from behind. Sassy turned, and gave Silver Shill a slight bow. “Ah, just the pony I should like to talk to. What news? Has Seneschal Rarity turned up?”
“No, ma’am, I’m afraid she hasn’t. And while it sounds like things are generally quiet outside the mansion tonight, I did hear something about a fire down in the Lower City that might interest you. It was arson, by the sound of it.”
Sassy paused. “What of it? Awful as it may be, it surely falls within somepony else’s jurisdiction to investigate.”
“Yes, ma’am, but this was in the area where you told me Lady Rarity was headed.”
“It… what?” Sassy’s eyes widened. “Tell me its exact location.”
He did. And Sassy’s eyes continued widening as he did. She raised a hoof to her mouth, fighting back tears.
“That traitorous whore,” Sassy spat. “I gave her one simple task to help demonstrate her loyalty, and she twists it into murdering one of my oldest and most helpful friends?! Such overt defiance of myself, my trust, and ultimately the Mistress, cannot be allowed to stand. Plate, Silver Shill, do either of you know where the Governor is now?”
“Ah, ma’am, ponies usually have to get on his schedule,” Silver Shill said, glancing at Fashion Plate.
“Schedule, schmedule!” Fashion Plate declared. “Do you think I’m gonna make my homefilly wait to get on Big B’s schedule when this kind of badness is going on?”
“Thank you, Plate,” Sassy said, smiling at him… but as she thought once more of Rarity, the warmth drained out of her smile, leaving a much more predatory aspect. “Gentlecolts, if it’s fire that Rarity wants, then we shall see her cast into eternal flame!”