Two days earlier…
Zephyr Breeze was finishing his last client of the day. He was the last in the shop and was looking forward to locking up and going to his apartment to enjoy some ‘Me Time’.
As he was brushing the clipped mane hair from his client, he heard the bell at the front door ring, announcing somepony just entered.
A large Pegasus stallion approached threateningly, looked at the client and said:
“Beat it!”
“She hasn’t paid yet,” said Zeph.
“Her lucky day,” said the stallion, “not yours.”
The mare got up and walked quickly to the door. There were two other rough looking Pegasi that had entered. One opened the door for the mare, then closed and locked it. Then they turned the sign on the door to ‘Closed’ and lowered the blinds.
“So hey Nim,” chuckled Zephyr nervously, “here for a trim?”
“Don’t try to be funny, laughing boy,” said Nim, “you know why I’m here. Your gambling debts have become quite high. It’s apparent that you’re not gonna come up with the bits. So the only way I’m get what’s due to me is in your blood.
Boys, hold him down!”
The ‘Boys’ grabbed Zeph and shoved him down and held him on the floor. Nim was about to kick Zeph’s face until his leg wore out but he noticed something and stopped before he started. There on Zephyr’s station was a picture of his sister.
“Who’s the looker?” asked Nim, “surely not your marefriend.”
“Who? Fluttershy?” said Zeph, “no, she’s my big sister,”
“Sister, eh? She married or have a coltfriend?”
“Not that I’m aware.”
“Virgin?”
“How the hay would I know that?” said Zeph upset at what he thought was being implied.
“It looks like I was wrong, it just might be your lucky day after all,” said Nim. He nodded to the two henchponies who pulled Zephyr up to his hooves.
“You and me,” said the stallion, putting a foreleg around Zeph, “we’re ‘bout to become the best of friends.”
“How come?” asked Zeph.
“I have a client, a bigwig in Saddle Arabia, Sheik Hasson ben-Eazi. He’s always looking to add beautiful, young and tender pony mares to his harem.
You introduce me to your sister and we can call your debt paid, we’ll even put the debt paid in writing.”
“But what if Fluttershy isn’t interested?”
“Leave that to me. I didn’t say I’d ask. But if you’re not gonna help then we’ll write the debt paid in your blood. Understand?”
“I understand,” said Zeph. He didn’t like the sound of this but what choice did he have, he thought?
In the present…
“So you see, what choice did I have?” asked Zeph, sounding pathetic.
“What choice did you have? What choice did you have!” exclaimed Twilight, her horn glowed ominously.
“Twilight, let me handle this,” said Mrs. Shy.
“Okay, mom,” said Twilight, her horn dimed.
Zephyr was expecting easier treatment from his mother, not what happened next.
Mrs. Shy drew back and slapped the stallion across the face, perhaps the hardest she could.
“You sold out your sister to save your own buckin’ hide?” said the mother with loathing. Rainbow or Zeph had never ever heard the mother swear. “I’m glad your father isn’t here. He’d die of a heart attack!”
“Where are they taking her?” asked Rainbow.
“Saddle Arabia, I suppose.” Said the Stallion, rubbing the spot his mother had slapped him.
Twilight then remembered something. There was a Saddle Arabian diplomat visiting Canterlot. Perhaps they could help.
“Come everypony,” said Twilight, “we have to get to Canterlot.”
“I don’t wanna go!” cried Zephyr. “I just wanna go home.”
“You buckin’ coward,” said Rainbow drawing back to smack the self-centered stallion, but the mother stopped her.
“I’m sure your sister didn’t want to go either,” said the mother still madder than she’d ever been in her life. “But what choice did you give her?”
“Harry, you’re coming too. Pick up that thing and bring him with us.”
Harry growled and picked up Zeph and tucked him under one arm and held him tightly, very tightly.
Ponies on the train looked at the group of 4 ponies and a large brown bear. The stallion looked terrified, the mares and the bear looked grim.
In Canterlot the group went straight to the castle. They made their way to the throne room. The guard wasn’t going to let the bear in. But Princess Twilight did something for the first time in her life and ‘pulled rank’ and commanded the guard to let the bear pass. Twilight tried not to let it amuse her when Harry growled a smug growl at the guards with his thumb claw to his nose.
The door to the throne room opened and Celestia looked up and saw the group. She noted the look on everypony’s faces.
They all entered, Rainbow, Zephyr, Mrs. Shy and Harry bowed.
“Twilight!” said Celestia, “what’s wrong? You usually let me know you’re coming.”
“Princess Celestia,” said Twilight. “This is Mrs. Shy and Zephyr Breeze. My Butterfly’s mother and brother. And this is Butterfly’s friend and protector, Harry.”
“Yes,” said Celestia looking at the bear, “I know Harry, how are you Harry?”
The bear waved and growled a friendly growl.
“Welcome to the rest of you,” finished the princess.
“You may want to hold your welcome for my love’s brother.” Said Twilight quite cross, Celestia didn’t miss it.
“Oh?” asked the princess.
Twilight’s aura pushed Zephyr forward.
“Tell the princess!” demanded Twilight.
Harry growled backing up Twilight.
Truthfully, Zeph was in more fear of Twilight and Harry than Celestia.
“Well, Your Highness…” Zeph went through everything he’d explained prior.
Princess Celestia was as emotionless as stone while the stallion spoke. When done, there was a few minutes of quiet as the Princess thought. Then she descended from her dais to the pathetic wretch of a stallion. Her gaze pierced him to his very soul. Then she turned to look at the mother.
“And you struck him after he told you this?” asked Celestia.
“Yes, Your Highness,” said Mrs. Shy looking very ashamed.
“She was…” started Zeph.
“We have not given you leave to speak,” said Celestia very officially. The royal We gave away her seriousness.
Zephyr hung his head.
“Twilight,” said Celestia, “you threatened him with imprisonment? And/or with allowing our brown friend here to deal with him?”
“Yes princess.” Said Twilight without any remorse.
“I see,” said the princess, “Zephyr, is it? You may consider yourself lucky.
Everypony around you has acted with restraint. Realize you committed this heinous act within what is technically Twilight’s realm. She could’ve enacted any punishment she saw fit and be within her right to do so.
Even death.
And I know if you’d have sold my sister into sexual slavery (Zephyr was surprised. He hadn’t considered it that way) you’d still be screaming in Tartarus!
That’s a fate worse than death. Death is over and then there’s no more pain or shame. But you’ve condemned your sister to a lifetime of pain, shame and loss of all dignity! And all because you couldn’t be responsible for your own actions.”
“I heard that a Saddle Arabian diplomat was in Canterlot,” said Twilight.
“Yes Twilight, that is until this morning,” said Celestia, “he was none other than that Sheik Hasson ben-Eazi.”
“Then let’s send the guard out after him,” said Twilight.
“We can’t,” said Celestia. “He has Diplomatic Immunity, so all who are in his entourage including, if he is with them, this Cumulonimbus. They all would be in his protection.”
“And Fluttershy?” asked Rainbow.
“It is true that if she’s with them against her will, then she would not be under that protection. But to get to her may be impossible. The other thing is that if they reach Saddle Arabia and the wedding ceremony is enacted, then it is legal by their laws. And in SA the bride doesn’t have to be willing. In fact, the mare has no rights at all in the more conservative factions. The only recourse would be if Fluttershy was already married.
The plus side is that SA weddings are three days long and in Saddle Arabia.”
Twilight thought for a moment, then her face lit up.
“Rainbow,” said Twilight, “do you know what the real function of a ‘best mare’ is?”
“They’re just the maid of honor, right?” said Rainbow wondering why this change in conversation.
“No Rainbow,” said Celestia, “It comes from the days when travel was harder. It was in case the bride was detained, the best mare would stand in for the bride and go through the wedding for the bride.”
“So the best mare would have to marry to the pony?”
“No, they’re representing the absent bride as a proxy, thus allowing the wedding to go forward. The two original ponies are married and the best mare remains unattached as they were prior.”
“Oh,” said Rainbow starting to understand where Twilight might be going with this.
“Mrs. Shy,” said Twilight, “I’d like to have had time for a big ceremony with all the frills and fun.
But needs must when Discord drives.
I’d like your permission to marry Fluttershy.”
The older mare hugged Twilight.
“Of course, Twilight.”
Twilight whispered in the mare’s ear:
“Ask Rainbow to be Fluttershy’s best mare.”
“Rainbow,” said Mrs. Shy, “would you do us the honor of being Fluttershy’s best mare?”
“I’d love to.” said Rainbow.
“Do I get to say anything?” asked Zephyr.
“What would you say?” asked Twilight.
“I’d really like to have you as a sister-in-law. Perhaps someday I can redeem myself and be considered family.”
“We will see,” said Twilight. “Princess, I think we’re ready.”
“My dearly beloved subjects…
… And so I am honored to say, I pronounce you wed, you may kiss your…
Oops! Force of habit.”
“Aw, don’t I get a kiss?” joked Rainbow.
“What the Tartarus,” said Celestia who put a wing around Rainbow and delivered a large kiss.
Despite the mood, almost everypony laughed. Rainbow looked in shock.
“Hey princess,” said Rainbow recovering, “how’d you like to go to dinner with me sometime?”
“We’ll see,” said the princess. There was an odd gleam in her eyes. “But for now, congratulations Mrs. Sparkle. Remember that this wedding by proxy is only good as long as Fluttershy agrees to it.
But for now, you have a wife to save. We’ll talk about the Princess Consort thing when you return. And after Rainbow takes me to dinner.”
Twilight smiled, Rainbow was still a bit shocked.
“Mom,” said Twilight, “you can stay here, my parents aren’t far, Princess Celestia can give directions or you can return home. Rainbow, Harry and I will be handling this. Zephyr is coming as well, the first step on his road to redemption. He’ll be needed to identify ponies.”
Then looking at Zephyr:
“And if he tries anything… Let’s just say I can be more creative than Rarity gives me credit for.”
“Raven,” said Celestia, the secretary had been in the background. “Please give Princess Twilight a marriage certificate so she can have it if needed.”
“Yes, Your Highness,” said the secretary.
It didn’t take long before the group were on a train south. They figured that they could get ahead of the caravan and intercept them in southern Equestria before they were even close to Saddle Arabia.
“What are we gonna do if we find them?” asked Rainbow.
“Well first,” said Twilight, “we’ll confront them. They may have diplomatic immunity but I’m still a princess, he’s a sheik. That’s equivalent to a lord or chieftain, so technically, I out rank him. And if he is to be treated as a diplomat, then he has to recognize my authority.”
“And if he doesn’t?” asked Rainbow.
“We try to reason with him.” Said Twilight.
“You realize that the sheik may be reasoned with,” said Zeph, “but I’m sure this isn’t going to go well with Nim. He’ll probably want to get me for the trouble.”
“Zephyr,” said Twilight, “you may be my brother-in-law right now. But you understand that what you’ve done is almost unforgivable. It would be best not to bring up reasons that would be unfortunate for yourself.
I could very easily be persuaded to let your friends have you, if not for your mother and sister’s sake.
And according to how she’s been treated, Harry might not need any permission to go berserk!”
“Too bad we didn’t bring popcorn,” said Rainbow scowling at Zephyr.
Later, somewhere in southern Equestria…
“Let’s camp here,” said Twilight. “They’ll have to come this way and they have no reason to try to take a longer path.”
“I’ll get a fire going,” said Rainbow.
“I don’t have a tent or blanket,” said Zeph.
“You should’ve thought about that before you sold your sister into sexual slavery,” said Twilight.
“I didn’t sell Fluttershy into sexual slavery” said Zeph.
“Did you say something?” asked Twilight threateningly.
“I didn’t sell…” said Zeph starting to repeat himself.
A bolt of purple whizzed just over his head, so close he felt it like static electricity. The bolt split a fairly substantial tree behind him. He turned and realized what would have happened if the bolt had hit him.
“I see your point,” said Zeph.
“Zeph,” said Rainbow trying to be helpful for Fluttershy’s sake. “you need to climb down off your normal flippant and self-serving attitude. Twilight loves Fluttershy deeply. You need to understand that, because she has power and authority to make you hurt in so many ways.”
“She wouldn’t kill me,” said the stallion in fear.
“No Zephyr,” said Twilight with a fire in her eyes. “But you’d be surprised what you can live through.
And Celestia help you if Discord gets wind of this! If he does, then all this will be moot and you’ll wish Harry would’ve eaten you alive.
You’ll be sleeping with our friend Harry, he’ll keep you warm. And he’ll also know if you try to get away.”
The next morning broke and Zephyr was cold where he was exposed to the night air. And the part that the bear was holding was almost too hot.
Twilight and Rainbow appeared from different directions from the woods. Apparently finishing the morning relieving of themselves.
“Hey Twilight,” said Zeph, “can I get up? I gotta go.”
“Harry, let him get up,” said Twilight.
The bear released Zephyr and he got to his hooves.
“Where’s the bathroom?”
“Zeph,” said Rainbow, “look around you. You can use any tree you want.”
“Gross!” said Zeph.
“Suit yourself,” said Twilight, without any sympathy, “mess yourself for all I care. Just stay downwind.”
“Okay,” said the forlorn stallion, “I see your point.”
Zephyr started to walk toward the trees.
“Go with him, Harry,” said Twilight. “So he doesn’t try to fly off.”
The bear growled in acknowledgement.
“I can’t go with anypony watching!”
“Harry is a bear, not a pony,” said Rainbow.
“Maybe you could go with me, Rainbows,” said Zeph in a flirtatious voice.
“Harry, bring that thing here,” said Rainbow.
Harry grabbed Zephyr and put him down none too gently in front of Rainbow.
“I’m going to explain myself one last time.” Said Rainbow irked at the whole game, “you have never meant anything to me other than Flutters brother. What ever attraction you thought I might have had for you was just you deluding yourself. I’m a mare-lover! I have several girls I’m seeing now. You never had any chance and I have put up with your little innuendos as a courtesy to Fluttershy and your mother.
That ends now! Even if I were so inclined, you selling your sister to sexual slavery…”
“I didn’t sell…” started Zeph. But a purple bolt of magic left a chard hole in the ground between his hooves. Twilight was scowling at him.
“You selling your sister into sexual slavery would have killed any chance you could have had.
And when it gets out that you did this to save your miserable hide. I doubt that there’ll ever be any mare that would trust you enough to even let you talk to her!”
“If you have to go,” said Twilight, “get it over with.”
Zephyr and Harry walked off into the woods as Rainbow and Twilight busied themselves breaking camp. But as they were finishing, they heard the noise of an approaching number of ponies.