Jack gave a long sigh, “I wonder if I am hallucinating?” he asked as he looked over to the blonde woman claiming to be Derpy.
From his chair, he could see that she was still going through the My Little Pony videos. She'd been going at it all night, right through his sleep and into the morning. For him, the very idea that the real Derpy Hooves was standing in his kitchen brought about bitter sweet emotions.One the one hand, Derpy was standing in his kitchen! On the second, Derpy was standing there in his kitchen! How and why did she get there? How was she going to get back? What is she going to do in the meantime? And why was he asking himself these questions? If there was one thing he was good at, was winging it. Second, the TARDIS was parked more or less out off the highway, at least they had that to go with. Or she had that to go with. Confused as she was, this was the Derpy who was a companion of the Doctor in Pony form. She could handle herself easily. At least, he hoped so. Currently, she was still trying to figure out how the computer actually worked, even though she had been at it all night. According to her, she accidentally closed the lid on it, and after Jack put in his password, was having trouble. She pressed a few buttons and the computer gave a loud beep. She ducked under the table in fear, knocking a plate to the floor to which it shattered.
“Oops, My bad!” she said.
“Nope,” said Jack.
It was like he was in one of those bad fan fiction stories he used to read every now and then. He laughed at the idea of posting a story like this back on the old FimFiction net. Ha, the responses he would get would surely be worth it. "Another Derpy-on-Earth story? Ugh, no thanks!", it would be hilarious! There were hundreds of those types of stories, and right now he wished that he had actually read a few if it would have helped in trying to get her back to Equestria.Sadly, all the sites that had those closed down years ago when the show ended. It was kind of hard, he himself had written a story or two. He wondered if there could still be a few around somewhere like on Deviant Art or something. He'd go check himself, but Derpy seemed to be having a fun time trying to operate that computer.
“Uh, its, its, its black.”
“It went to sleep. Just press the space bar,” called Jack.
“Sleep!? You sure I can wake it?”
“Trust me it wont mind,” said Jack.
Derpy pressed the space bar and everything went back to normal. She pressed the file where the videos were kept and the next episode was finally brought up. She clapped with joy until a beeping started up behind her. “I didn't do that!”
“I know.” groaned Jack, standing up. He walked over to a small clock on his stove and clicked it off and grabbed his police belt. He put it on with Derpy watching in and tucked in his uniform. In moments, Officer Parker was ready for another day on patrol.
“Okay, I need to get to work. I'll be back, oh... around 5:50 this afternoon if everything goes good.”
“So, I'm here all by myself?” Derpy asked, a tinge of worry in her voice.
“More or less.” replied Jack, “Just, don't answer the door, don't go outside, and... well, yeah stay in here.”
“Okay.” said Derpy, not wanting to go outside and instead still fiddle with the computer. She froze briefly before asking her next question, “What if something happens?”
Jack looked around the room for a moment, trying to find something. "Uh.... here.” He walked over and grabbed a house phone and placed it front of her.
“Knew having this would come in handy," he exclaimed before continuing to put on his gear. "If someone breaks in, or the house catches on fire, dial 911, say Officer Parker's house is.... whatever is going wrong, and just run for it.”
“What if it rings?” she asked him.
“Don't answer it. As much as I hate to say this, no one can figure out your here!”
“Why?” asked Derpy.
“Because they'll think you're crazy. You look like a human, and if you claim that you are a pegasus from Equestria, they will think you're insane." Jack tried to mumble quietly in order to not offend Derpy, "Your eyes wont help much either.”
“What's wrong with my eyes?” Derpy responded angrily, overhearing the hushed whisper.
“Nothing!” said Jack thinking to quickly change the subject, “Just... Keep watching the videos until I get back, alright?”
“I can do that!” said Derpy, “When do we go back to the TARDIS?”
“Right, I didn't think of that..." Jack thought for a moment as he snapped on his badge, "When I get back, I'll get my truck and tow it back alright?”
“Alright!” answered Derpy cheerfully.
Jack nodded and walked out the door. Derpy went back to the computer and started to watch the next episode.
“Hey! That's me!” she said happily.
As creepy as it was watching videos about Equestria, it sure was entertaining. At least she was with a nice guy, or human. According to what she heard from the Doctor, Humans were capable of great acts of kindness, invention, and feats of power she had never seen before. At the same time, he warned her they could be the cruelest things on par with a Dalek This Jack guy however was nice. He was a Police Officer after all, whatever that was. They seemed similar to the Royal Guard and although they were always official and steadfast, were always willing to lend a hoof when others were in danger. Her thoughts soon returned to the screen when she saw Rainbow Dash competing in a race against two dragons and her ex-friend Gilda.
------
In Ponyville, Whooves was still at it trying to make a TARDIS. Twilight herself walked up carrying a bag of clothes she had and placed the on the ground. So far, the Doctor had created a central console, two walls, and the central pillar from where the heart would be stored. He worked furiously, and was drawing quite the confused looks from the passerbys. He ignored each of them. Twilight herself sat down in the grass and watched.
“So, how exactly do you make a TARDIS?” asked Twilight.
“Well, that's just the thing!” said Whooves, “You don't make a TARDIS, you grow them!”
“Grow them?”
“Yep! Grow them from coral I do believe. Or something.”
'So, why don't you go grow one instead of building one from scratch?”
“Because that would take awhile.... a few thousand years give or take a millenia. Besides, despite what I said, I'm not exactly building a TARDIS.”
Twilight looked at him in slight confusion, “So what are you building?”
“A TARDIS!” came Whooves
“But you need to grow those,” answered Twilight, now even more confused than before
“Yep.” Whooves responded matter-of-factly, putting up another wall.
“So, your not building a TARDIS?”
“Nope!”
“So, what ARE you building?”
“A TARDIS!”
“But... that doesn't... didn't you say? RRRRGGH! That doesn't make any sense!”
“That's what you think! Now, stand back, this is going to cause me some slight pain!”
“What?”
“Rassilon Imprimatur!" he announced, "I need to do this or else we're going to disintegrate the moment we travel forward in time!"
The Doctor motioned Twilight to the fourth wall on the ground, "Close up this wall will you, it might send panic amongst the other ponies when I do this.”
"Why? Is it painful?"
Whooves did not answer, but gave her a stone faced look. Twilight grabbed the last wall that needed to be put up and sealed it together with the rest of the new... well, whatever it was. A small door had been fitted to it, but there was no window to see in. From inside, the Doctor began to feel the pull of energy needed to create the new TARDIS and there was a flash of light. When it was over, he opened the door, shaking his hoof.
“There, I think we're ready!”
“What happened?”
“I primed it! Now all we need to let it do is rest for a few moments and we'll be ready to go!”
“Rest? What?”
Twilight looked into the makeshift TARDIS-thing, and saw that the central console was lit up. Another thing she noticed was it was about the same size inside as out!
“Uh, Doctor, it's not bigger on the inside.”
“I know. It's sort of a...temporary TARDIS.”
“What? Temporary TARDIS?”
“Yeah! You don't need a TARDIS to travel through time! Just a vortex manipulator! That's essentially what this is, I just added in a few designs from my TARDIS to do just that!”
“So, it's not a TARDIS?”
“Well, It is a TARDIS, but at the same time it's not a TARDIS.”
“Would you stop that!” screamed Twilight.
“Well, you asked.”
She shot him a dark look, to which he returned with a smile. Twilight looked back at box that now stood proudly in the yard, and another question entered her mind. Despite what her conscience told her, she had to ask it.
“Why is it temporary?”
“Simple! We'll be lucky if it even survives the trip through time, let alone dimensions!”
“WHAT!?”
“That's what you get when you create an imposter TARDIS. I don't even think this thing will even be able to fly through space!” he claimed cheerfully.
“You're not giving it a sound argument there.”
“It knows it's job! Get us to the next Universe over and save Derpy! Keep an eye on it while I go get my clothes!”
Twilight watched him trot happily off to Derpy's house, where he kept a few of the clothes he owned, and collapsed on the ground.
----
Jack sat in his cruiser and stared at the sky. His thoughts had turned from 'How did this happen', to 'Why did it happen to him?' Maybe it was just a fluke, coincidence, a stroke of luck? If it was the last one, he wasn't counting himself lucky. His mind was awash with questions to the point he let cars going well over the speed limit pass by without even a care in the world. His thoughts turned to what he was going to have to do once he got the TARDIS back to his place. He'd have to tow it there somehow, as a Police cruiser sitting on the side of a highway with a Officer and some woman going in and out? Well, now that he thought on it, that would kind of make sense. Of course he'd have to leave it over night, he had no idea of what was in that thing. He'd go through one door, and well, end up in the arctic or a pool. Even if he let Derpy stay and Guard it, what if someone went in it? he thought to be a actual regular police box until Derpy pointed it out to him. Then you got some random guy who has the most advanced piece of technology this planet had ever seen. If that came to be true, the Doctor would kill him! If not, make him wish he was dead. He breathed out heavily when his radio came to life.
“Car 42, Car 42 please respond!”
Jack grabbed the mic and clicked it on: “42 here. What's up?”
“We got a call about a disturbance in Old Town. Trixie's bar and Grill.”
“Oh god, please not them.” he pleaded outside his mic, "Uh, I'm a good few miles away, isn't there someone else in the area?"
"We were told to keep units away unless it would turn ugly."
"So why me!?" he yelled irate
“They asked for you specifically. Yes, it's her again.”
“Damn it!” cursed Jack, “Why is it always me!? Let her beat up another officer for once!”
“They're saying chairs are being thrown!”
“WHAT!? What do you mean she's throwing chairs!? Jesus, what set her off this time? Alright, I'm on it. Don't send backup.”
"We have units establishing a perimeter."
"Negative. Just have the guys go one their patrols. They wont be necessary."
"You sure?"
"yeah I'm sure."
He grumbled something incoherent even to himself. It was a mix of griping, groaning, and anger all jumbled up into a bunch of words that all came out at the same time. Jack started up his cruiser and hit the lights. He took off down the road, getting some humor from seeing a car who though that they had gotten him as he sailed past. That soon past as he thought back on what was happening.
“Throwing chairs!? What happened this time?”
It was a few minutes later when he arrived at the scene, and saw the large crowd gathering around.Most were straining their necks and rising up on their feet to try and get a better look. Others were taking cover, having seen enough. Other cars were turning around, deciding this wasn't the best street to go down. No one suspected the next car to be a Police cruiser, well a few who saw did, but not the majority of them. He had to flash the siren just to get people to move out of the way. At that point, they did, and even gave him a little lane for a parking spot. As he pulled to the side of the road, he saw a line of motorcycles lined up outside.
“Great," he groaned.
Stepping out, he heard a window smash and looked to see a skinny little guy landing on his side and rolling through the shattered glass and onto the street. The man quickly got up and ran away at top speed. Jack sighed and drew his tazer. If people were being tossed out the window, that meant things had went south really really fast. He walked over to he entrance with others thinking he was going to get torn a new one, or just plain old killed. Standing there looking in was, well, more of a acquaintance of his. She was a good friend of his girlfriends and the one who probably asked for him specifically over the phone. She was the only one brave enough to stand out in the open and watch the spectacle unfold. She signed and shook her head in embarrassment.
“Hi, Tara.” greeted Jack as he walked up
“Huh? Oh, Hi Jack. She's in there.”
As she finished, a chair smashed on the wall.
"Really?" he spoke sarcastically
Tara gave him a dark look, but he smiled and it went away. Poking his head through the door to see a chaotic mess. Chairs smashed, tables overturned, and a few large burly bikers laying on the floor clutching their wounds. He looked on impressed and grabbed his radio on his shoulder.
“Yeah, Dispatch, Parker here. Send a ambulance.”
“Roger. Ambulance sent. Sure you don't need backup?”
“Have animal control on alert," he laughed.
Dispatch didn't respond. Jack chuckled a little bit more as a bottle was thrown across the room and smashed. Pulling his head out of the door, he shifted his attention back to Tara. “So, Tara, what set her off?”
“She was denied acceptance to the Academy.” she said.
“Ooh. No wonder she's in a rage." He hypothesized what started the chain reaction of events, "One of the bikers hit on her?”
“No, they made fun of her hair,” answered Tara putting her face in her palm for even mentioning something so childish.
Jack sighed and walked in. He was immediately shoved out of the way by a fleeing man, who tripped over his own shoes, but continued to scramble on as fast as he could. He looked back inside to see a rainbow haired woman standing there holding a man twice her size with one hand, ready to punch in his already bruised up face with her other fist.
“Alright Dash, put him down,” said Jack.
Dash looked up to him with the darkest look she could give a person. She dropped the man and walked over ready to beat him up as well.
“You want to start something as well?” she asked.
“Not if I don't have to,” answered Jack.
“You still don't scare me.”
“Yes, and you still scare me. However, I'm the only Police Officer who wont taze you or hold you at gun point.”
She glared at him and stamped on his foot with all her might. Jack grimaced in pain a little, but kept his composure.
“You do know that I'll have to arrest you for this.”
“You can try,” she sneered
“It's this very reason as to why you weren't accepted to the Air Force Academy. Being a bullheaded showoff that doesn't want to follow the rules! Especially one that causes property damage. ...On this level.”
He finished as a light fixture landed behind them both and shattered on the ground. Dash glared at him, ready to beat the officer into submission. It was almost a comical sight really. Jack was a good foot taller than dash, even then, he was slightly intimidated by her. Dash was ready to give this Officer a piece of her mind, and probably a piece of himself at the same time when she got around to it. Instead, she broke down and collapsed into him and began to cry. He carefully folded an arm behind Dash's back and gently hugged her.
“I'm sorry you didn't make it,” he told her.
He was a little offset by suddenly having to comfort her, but he knew getting in the Academy was her biggest dream. To be able to fly with the Thunder Birds, and do tricks with them. Right now, with this episode, all those chances seemed lost and ruined. It was helped when Tara walked in, although it didn't stop Dash from crying. She tried her best to comfort her friend, allowing her to cry on her instead of Jack. Regardless, she got no further than Jack did. After some needed breathing time, Jack pulled the radio to his lips.
“Dispatch, suspect in custody.”
“Suspect? As in single?! We're getting reports of a major bar brawl! A whole gang of bikers! What do you mean suspect?”
“I got one suspect. That will answer everything. See you at the station.”
He ended his call and looked Dash still sobbing on Tara's arms. it pained him to do so, but he took out his cuffs and placed it on the rainbow haired girl.
“Do you have to?” asked Tara.
“I have no choice! She's caused more property damage today than all of last month.”
Dash ended her crying while Jack walked her outside. tears were still rolling down her face as a news crew rolled up. They tried to turn on their cameras and get a shot, but were stopped by Jack. For his friends sake, he pointed his tazer at them as he led Dash into his cruiser. Tara walked up, doing her best to shield her friend from the cameras that she knew were rolling. She gave Jack a pleading look, and he had no choice but to give a answer.
“I'll do my best, but I can't guarantee that I'll get her out of this one.”
“Okay," Tara dejectedly gave a huff. "Lou says 'Hi,' by the way!”
“Thanks! Jack called back, putting Dash in the car, “Tell everyone else I said 'Hi,' as well.”
“You still going to April's Farm Festival? Diane is helping bake this time!”
“I was invited! Of course!” laughed Jack getting in, “How about you Dash? You going?”
“Yeah I'm going.” she grunted, “It's the only thing I can do now.”
Jack smiled at her. It was all he could do given the situation. as crews were desperately trying to get someone to say something, he drove off.