“Quit avoiding the question, Feather. What ‘appened back there wasn’t you. I don’t know who it was, but it just wasn’t you. What’s going on?” Pipsqueak asked, shifting around more on Feather’s back, each time sending a shock of pain through his injured leg.
“Can we drop it, please? I just, really wanted to get out of there. It was nothing to do with him, trust me. I was happy to meet him, thanks for that.” Featherweight stared straight ahead as they walked past other ponies, towards the restaurant they saw earlier.
“No probl...Quit avoiding the question!” Pipsqueak blurted.
“Alright, Alright. Sorry. Keep your voice down. We don’t want to attract bad attention. Like I said, I wanted to get out of there. I, uh,” Featherweight scrunched his face in concentration, partly to act like he was remembering why, partly to buy himself time to come up with a reason why, “I was kinda creeped out by the, what was it called? Reclaimed happiness? That one. It just freaked me out a bit. Don’t know why.” Featherweight craned his neck, looking around, remembering the scenery, and key places to get bearing of the giant city. “I think we’re close,”
“Good, cause you were at least right about one thing. I am hungry,” Pip patted his stomach.
“Well, see. It wasn’t all bad, was it? Quit giving me a hard time about it.”
“It’s not like that, Feather. I’m just...worried.”
“There’s nothing to be worried about. You know me. I’m fine.”
“You say that all the time,”
“And I mean it every time I say it. I look fine, right? I feel fine. I’m perfectly ok.”
You’ve been shivering this entire time, you forgot to eat breakfast, you just opted to willingly not talk to the pony you’ve had a an idol for a long time. No reason to worry at all. Pipsqueak thought, shaking his head. “Right,”
“This is the place, right?” Feather asked, pointing up to the sign that said Bella Notte
“I think so. Let’s head in,” Pipsqueak got off of Featherweight, not hearing his sigh of relief amidst the havoc of the city.
They walked in, adjusting their eyes to the sudden decrease in lighting. “It’s kinda dark, don’t you think?” Feather asked.
“Yeah, but it doesn’t look all that bad. Come on,” Pip walked in further, hoping to get noticed by a server.
“Good afternoon, how many?” A waitress in all dark uniform asked.
“Just two,” Featherweight said, smiling at the mare.
“Alright, well please follow me,” She said as she grabbed two menus and walked into the dimmly lit restaurant.
“So why is it so dang dark in here?” Pipsqueak asked.
“Well, here at bella notte, we like to keep a low and reserved aesthetic in our restaurant. It is, after all, one of the more upper class restaurants in Vanhoover. Right here alright for you gentlecolts?” She asked, ushering a hoof to a booth in the corner of the restaurant.
“Fine by me,” Featherweight said, taking the seat that was backed up by both walls.
“Yep,” Pipsqueak jumped up to the seat across from Feather.
The waitress sat down the menus, one being an adult menu for Featherweight, the other, a kids menu, placed before Pipsqueak.
They both looked down at the kids menu in silence before Featherweight burst out laughing.
“Quiet, you!” Pipsqueak too the menu and hit Feather over the head with it, immediately stopping his laughter. “I’m sorry, ma’am, but can I have an adult menu?”
“Oh! My apologies. Let me get that real quick for you,” She said, quickly trotting over to grab one.
The debacle had ended and they ordered their meals, opting to plan out what they would do next. During a brief break from their planning when they got their food, Featherweight decided to switch the subject. “Hey, Pip,”
“Yeah, mate?”
“D-do you think the rest of the student council members don't want me here?” Featherweight asked, somewhat nervously.
“I, uhm, well no. Of course not. What could possibly have made you think that?” Pipsqueak asked, beginning to eat.
“Well, during the train ride. When I went to go look for the food kiosk. It felt like everypony else was watching me. Just...Judging me. I can’t really explain it well, but I didn’t feel right. It doesn’t help to think that they were perfectly ok without me going, even pushing and suggesting reasons as to why I shouldn’t.” Featherweight picked at his food.
Pipsqueak sat quietly for a moment, contemplating. “I don’t think it’s like that, Feather.”
“Oh really?” Featherweight wasn’t smiling anymore. “Cause I do. We know they all love you. You’re the class president. Who am I?” Featherweight asked, a stern glare piercing through the shaded room toward Pip. Stop this.
“I don’t know what yo-”
“Who am I, Pipsqueak? Compared to you? I’m no one important. Not important enough for a trip, not important enough for a visit in the hospital. You were the only one, Pip. The only pony to visit me. No one else bothered to care.” Featherweight hissed through grit teeth, getting progressively more angry. You don’t want to do this. Not to him. Especially not to him.
“That isn’t wh-”
“Isn’t it? Even I have to face the facts sometimes and the facts are that no one cares about me.” Featherweight began trembling more, his eyes shifting between Pipsqueaks open mouth and the entrance to the restaurant.
“Ok, that is just not true. Featherweight. I care about you. That’s why I talked to Henri Bisson. I was bloody confused as to what I felt when I saw those pictures of those stallions kissing. It reminded me of that feeling. It was that feeling you described all those months back. ‘Member? We were talking about loneliness. You said something about it being a pit in your chest. Like something’s missing. I told him that.” Pipsqueak began to sound less confident in his speech, “It makes sense, what he said. That pit, that emptiness. I’ve been feeling it ever since you had your accident. I know what it means.”
Featherweight went wide eyed, heart sinking into the deepest, darkest corner of his chest. Don’t say it. Please don’t say it.
“You know what Henri said?” Pipsqueak stood up in his seat, “That pain, that pit, that want. It’s a want to love, to be loved. Featherweight,” Pipsqueak paused for a moment, his mouth running dry and his voice getting hoarse.
Stop. Don’t. Please. You can’t. There isn’t any way. Featherweight began to breathe heavily, his left eye twitching.
“I care for you. I can’t remember a good day that I’ve had that wasn’t with you. All of our memories together, all of our adventures, all of them.They were amazing. When you got hurt, after I took you to the hospital, I cried.” Pip stopped again, trying to compose himself, “I cried because it was my fault you hit your head. Every time you stayed asleep at the schoolhouse, I kicked myself for not checking in on you so you would go home. I care, trust me I care. I care because, because I love you!” Pipsqueak spoke, the words coming out like sandpaper, but still coming out.
Featherweight held his head down, mind replaying those words over and over again in his head, I love you, I love you. Don’t you hear that? He loves us? We love him. Go ahead, tell him. I can’t. I don’t love him. I just…...can’t
“You’re shaking again.”
“I’m fine!” Feather blurted, getting the attention of some other patrons near their booth.
“You’re not fine. You haven’t been fine since your accident! I can see it. You need he-”
“Help?! For what? There isn’t anything wrong with me. I’m fine. I am doing alright. I’m normal and healthy!” Featherweights hooves wouldn’t stop shaking on the table, so he shot them down beneath it, accidentally hitting his damaged hoof. He groaned as pain erupted once again throughout his limb. You’re going to far! You need to stop!
Pip sat there, stunned in silence
“There’s nothing to see. If you can’t see that I’m fine, then what’s the point of talking to you anymore. You’ll just accuse me of being sick. I’m not sick. I’m ok. And you know what?” Featherweight moved from out of the table, setting down everything he was carrying except his camera. “I’ve had enough of it.” Stop! “If you are going to be like that, then I don’t think we should be friends anymore! I-I-I-I,” He willed and forced himself to push those last three words out, Don’t say it! His mind was in panic mode, whispers of ponies coming from all directions at this point, whispering, conspiring, “I hate you!” Featherweight spat, yelling at Pip. What transpired immediately afterward happened so fast, it left even Featherweight in a whirlwind. He dashed out, leaving his bags and Pipsqueak. He didn’t know where to go, but quickly looking around, he flew up, remembering the landmarks he had pointed out before, flying off to a distant part of the city.
Pipsqueak stood there, just stood there. He blinked repeatedly, trying to make the bad dream end, to make it disappear. Reality did not cease to exist and he was left with a horrible situation. He looked to the bags, and then back to where Featherweight used to sit. His heart stopped beating when he saw Feather’s plate. Completely full. Nearly untouched. “Oh, Dear Luna,” He said before calling over his waitress to settle his check and grabbing both bags to head back to the hotel.
Pipsqueak failed to focus on anything while heading back, unable to understand what Featherweight was saying. He...Hates me. The doors slid open to the hotel, letting in the warm air and an exhausted colt to the foyer.
“Pipsqueak?” Filthy sat in the foyer, reading the paper. “What are you doing back so early? Where’s Featherweight?”
“I think he came back to the hotel. He probably doesn’t want to see me right now.” Pipsqueak sniffed, everything starting to register with him, “I think pushed him too far.”
“Now, now. How about you set those bags down and come have a seat next to me. You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to, just sit. Calm down for a bit.” Filthy said, removing some paperwork from the seat and patting it.
Pip sat down the bags and got up on the chair. He sniffed once again before letting the tears flow. It was all confusing for him. It all hurt.
It took a good couple of hours for Pipsqueak to finally calm down enough to talk to Filthy, who by this point had begun to worry for Pipsqueak as much as Featherweight. Once the sunset had come, Pipsqueak began recounting everything that had transpired that day.
“And he just left. He told me he hated me and left.” Pipsqueak said between shudders and shakes, blowing his nose once again into a tissue.
“Well, I’m sorry that all this has happened. I would of thought that going on the trip would have made things better for Featherweight. Tell you what, son. How about we go up to your room, grab Featherweight and we head out for ice cream. We can talk over what happened and things will get better. Sound good?” Filthy asked nervously, You’re really grasping at straw at this point, Filthy.
“I-I guess.” Pip said, his voice light and raspy.
“That’s the spirit. Let’s go.”
Every step they took made Pipsqueak all the move anxious at what Featherweight’s response would be. Celestia knows what he’s been doing in here for so long. Pipsqueak thought as he held his key to the door and unlocked it, opening it up to an empty room.
“Featherweight? Come on, let’s go get some Ice cream,” Filthy called out.
No response, no movement, nothing came back as a response to Filthy.
“Feather?” Pipsqueak asked as he walked in, searching the entire suite, only to find no one. “He isn’t here!” Pipsqueak said, Wide eyed and fearful.
“Oh no” Filthy muttered underneath his breath.
…………..
In a dimly lit alley, far off from the hotel, whispering and mumbling could be heard, but only one pony was inhabiting the area.
“It won’t work. They’ll find us.” Featherweight said, his eyes twitching more and wilder than ever. “They won’t find us. We’ve been in this situation before. We haven’t been found out yet. It’ll be just like Ponyville. Just find the restaurants and bakeries that throw out their food, find a clean water source, find work. We can live here forever. We’ll have to.” Feather’s head pounded, his body shook, and his vision tunneled. “Food. I need food. No! I’m fine. I don’t need food. I can go another night without food. It’s not like we haven’t before.” Featherweight began to smile as he lurched down, his back legs giving out from underneath him from fatigue, his front following as more pressure came down on his wounded hoof. He began to laugh, laying down in a covert in the alley, “It will all be ok,” He said before resting his head, dozing off to sleep. His ear twitched every so often, sometimes his eye would follow. I’m……...fine