//------------------------------//
// Chapter 21 - Secrets 
// Story: Off The Mark 
// by Goldfur 
//------------------------------//

Life settled back into a routine after the Equestria Games, which is not to say that it was all smooth sailing. Clashes between Trixie and Twilight continued to occur even as I did my best to act as a buffer between them. It’s not as if either mare disrespected the other, but rather they were of such different personalities that they could not help but rub each other the wrong way.  Nevertheless, it was those very differences that Equestria needed as their different strengths enabled the diarchy to work effectively.  Twilight hated the formality of Royal Court while Trixie reveled in it.  The blue mare despised the paperwork, but the purple alicorn not only attacked hers with gusto; she also error-checked her co-ruler’s each day.  Trixie came up with innovative ideas and Twilight analyzed them to ensure that they were practical and, if they passed inspection, directed them to the appropriate ponies or worked them into the budget for the future.  Yes, they made quite a team – just as long as they weren’t together in the same room for too long.  Sometimes that was impossible such as when the G&PT had to do her magic lessons. Those days were particularly exhausting for me.  Thank heavens for weekends!

Every Friday afternoon, I would catch the last train to Ponyville.  I had made permanent arrangements with the railway company to reserve a private compartment for me, and my status even bought me a few minutes grace once when I was running late and they delayed the departure until I arrived.  There were a few big tips that day.  Sometimes Steady Flight would accompany me.  As my best friend, I enjoyed his company although I encouraged him to spend some time with his own family on the weekends.  That was a little selfish of me, I admit, because I wanted to spend a little mare time as Marklestia.  Having gotten a taste of perfection in flight, I couldn’t let it go anymore, and frankly, I enjoyed being something other than my klutzy self occasionally.  That was one thing that no other magic seemed to be able to cure, although I was slowly improving my flight abilities as a stallion with Steady’s ever-patient tutelage.  Why my skills and experience refused to transfer to my male self when I transformed back, I may never know.

Hanging out with the girls was always fun whichever form that I was in.  Sometimes one couldn’t be available for some reason or another, especially Rarity whose efforts to grow her business would occasionally take her away from Ponyville.  I heard that she was working towards branching out with a store in Canterlot, and I certainly could see why she would choose that locale.  However, on the latest trip to the capital, she had found the time to visit me at the castle.  I was delighted to entertain her there for once, but upon seeing her sly smile when we took afternoon tea in the privacy of my quarters, I got the sensation of a trap closing.  And that’s why I was now packing up to go to Ponyville to give another fashion show for my friends.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come along with me this time?” I asked Steady again.  He was my only hope for an excuse to bow out of modeling Rarity’s latest designs after the fashionista had browbeaten me into agreeing.

“Nah, I have other plans,” Steady replied. “Some friends want me to go with them to a special event, and it sounds intriguing.”

I sighed.  I couldn’t blame him for doing exactly what I kept telling him to do on the weekends.  Just why did it have to be now? “I’m sorry we won’t get to hang out this weekend,” I said as I finished packing my bag and slung it over my back.

Steady helped me fasten it securely into place.  “Don’t sweat it, Mark – once you’re with your friends, you definitely won’t miss me.”

As I headed out the door, I told him to enjoy himself.  He replied, “You too, Mark.  Break a leg!”

What the heck did he mean by that?





The next day as I entered the boutique, Twilight gave me a hug in greeting then removed my wristband.

“First of all, this would clash with your coat during the show. Secondly, I have a new and improved version! The old one had the exact same problem we were trying to solve, just on the upper half of the magic storage range.  Version 2.0 draws expanding black bands from the outside inwards when you are above 50%. The red line will get thinner and thinner until it disappears.” She looked up at me meaningfully.

“And that’s when I disappear.”

“A bit more spectacularly than that. Just don’t let that happen. The other feature is that the band will prevent your cells from discharging at a rate faster than you can control.  When the entire band starts glowing slightly, you'll know that is happening.  This also means you need to take longer to discharge your excess.  You can monitor it with the band, but discharging from a 50% charge will take a couple of minutes now.”

I nodded.  “Thank you for looking out for me, Twilight.”

She beamed.  “That's what friends are for, Mark!”

I nodded fervently as we made our way to the backstage area of the catwalk that Rarity had set up.  There we found the mare working on last-moment preparations for the show.  From previous experience, I figured it would be at least an hour before the show would start, which is why only the three of us were present so far in advance.

“Mark, darling!  Are you ready to make the magic?” Rarity asked as she came up to give me a hug.

“Only for you, Rares,” I replied, hoping that I would get over my bout of stage fright like I did last time.  Right now, I hoped changing into Marklestia would help settle my nerves.

“Just a moment,” Twilight said as she lit up her horn.  “I want to monitor the transformation process this time.”

I had not noticed before, but Twilight had brought the colander and printout machine up from her basement. I sighed and dutifully took the former pasta strainer from the hold of her magic and placed it on my head.  The machine beeped to life and the paper roll in the machine started to scroll rapidly. 

Twilight faced the machine, twisted a couple of dials and called over her shoulder, “Okay, I’m ready.”

I suppose I should have been relieved that she wasn’t wearing her padded lab coat and goggles this time. I shrugged and uncorked my bottle of potion, noting that it was getting a little low from all the occasions that I had used it.  I drank a dose and felt the magic take hold of me.  

When the transformation was complete, Twilight rolled the scroll back a ways and studied it. She spoke up with a distracted tone.  “Interesting.” 

“What did you find?” I asked in Celestia’s pleasant cultured voice as I put the colander onto the top of the machine.

“Your cells were in an intermediate state for around 20 milliseconds.  They didn't read as pony cells at all.” 

“Do you think they were human cells?” 

“Maybe?  I don't know. Hmmm…”  She looked me over. “And your mane and tail are back to their regular length. That answers that question.”

I looked behind me to see that she was right and that Rarity was giving a little happy dance.  Obviously, she had been counting on this to best show off her outfits.

Twilight turned off her machine and headed for the main room. “I need to set up the camera and speak-and-see crystal.  I'll have to go over my data later, but for now...” 

Rarity grinned possessively and finished Twilight’s sentence, “…you belong to me.” 

I seriously started to reconsider the whole idea, but of course, Rarity was all business while getting the new outfits fitted and finished over the next hour.  It kept my mind off the upcoming parade up until it came time to trot out the first outfit made from pink silk and black lace.  I balked at the curtain when I saw two rows of ponies waiting in the audience. The Element Bearers were lined up on the back row of lounge chairs, while Steady, Trixie, and Raven relaxed in the front row, saying nothing but watching me expectantly. 

I felt my ears droop as I quickly retreated back to Rarity.  I could tell I was hyperventilating.  “Trixie, Raven, and Steady are out there!  What are they doing here?  I can't go out there now!”  

Rarity frowned and gave me a disappointed look.  “Mark, do try to pull yourself together.  They are here because I invited them.”  

My mouth hung open as I stared at her in shock.  I had never felt so betrayed.

“Tell me, darling – do you trust each and every one of them with your life?”

I looked down and thought about it as I got my breathing under control.  “Yes.  Yes, I do.”

“Your time as Celestia is an important part of your life in Equestria now. If you think of all three of them as close friends, why haven't you seriously considered letting them see you as you truly are when in this form?  Don't you trust them that far?”

I really hadn't expected this to be thrown back into my face.  I thought about it while my heart stopped racing.  

“I... I don't know.  I just... I'm afraid.  I don't want to be humiliated, and that's how I feel right now.”

Rarity came up and pulled me into a hug. I rested my head on her withers while I felt my panic slowly ebb away.

“That's not going to happen, Mark. Not in my shop.”  She stepped back so she could look me in the eyes.  “Princess Trixie wrote me a very polite letter asking if she, Raven, and Steady could attend your next fashion show, saying that the three had already made a Pinkie Promise to keep your moonlighting job and form a secret.”

I shouldn't have been surprised, but I still jumped when the aforementioned pink mare walked out from behind Rarity. “Completely true!”  The Element of Laughter strolled past us into the main room.

Rarity continued as if nothing had happened.  “After they arrived, they took an oath to all six of us not to do anything to make you feel embarrassed.  If they do, Applejack has promised to buck them out of the shop and all the way to the train station.”  I winced. “In Trixie's case, she went as far as to threaten to kick her through the marble walls of the palace for good measure.  Bit of history there, I think.”

I sat on my rump as I processed everything. Then my eyes narrowed.  “Who blabbed?”

“According to Trixie, it was Steady Flight.”

I blinked.

“Something about photos not being hidden very well and discovering them while cleaning up your mess.”

I facehoofed and groaned.  His odd behavior was making a lot more sense now.  He'd been dropping hints the last couple of weeks and I'd completely missed them.  As far as pranking me back for tricking Cadance into interrogating him, I had to admit to myself this was epic payback.

After I had recovered, I glared at Rarity. “You could have just asked me beforehand.”

The fashionista sighed.  “You are a very stubborn stallion, Mark Wells.  Do you think you would have been so honest with your feelings unless you were confronted with them?”

I ground my teeth for a moment.  She was right, of course.  Then I stopped and looked at her appraisingly.  “Wait.  So is this one of those ‘Friendship Lessons’?”

She smiled.  “Perceptive as always, dear.  So now you have a choice.  You can continue with the show or cancel it.  It is entirely up to you.  Exactly how much confidence do you have in your friends – all of them?”

I considered the bonds I had developed with Steady, Trixie, and Raven during our months in Canterlot together. All the hours spent in court, serving the nations ponies, flight lessons, defending Trixie’s crown, everything.  I stood up.  My hooves danced on the floor as I exercised my muscles — trotting, hopping, and flapping around as I built up my enthusiasm again.  My head and neck bounced up and down and I snorted at nopony in particular.  Rarity sat quietly as I moved around the room.  After a couple of minutes, I had worked up a bit of a sweat and felt focused again.  I turned to the alabaster mare.  “OK. Let's do this.”

She nodded and came up to whisper in my ear as I panted from my recent exertion.  “You are fearless.  You are about to show your soulmate exactly how beautiful you are.”  I nodded my head and repeated the mantra to myself, feeling the mindset of a confident mare start to take over me and guide all of my movements.  I then pushed through the curtains and owned that stage!













This time, I felt my self-awareness return when Rarity and I were standing side-by-side on the makeshift catwalk at the completion of the show.  Her flank was pressed against mine and I realized that might be what drew me out of my trance. Everyone in the audience was clopping their hooves together and wore enthusiastic smiles.

Rarity called out, “We have new members in the audience tonight.  I would like them to give us their thoughts.  Be completely honest please – we are all among friends here.” 

Everypony looked to Trixie first. For once, she seemed to be at a loss for words. 

“Ummm…” 

The stares from all the mares present started to get a bit harder.

Trixie sighed.  “Thank you for sharing that part of yourself with us.  You should never be ashamed of who you are, even if you only let yourself go like this on rare occasion.”  She looked up at me and the rest of those present gauged me for my reaction.  

I smiled and nodded.  “Thanks, Trixie.  That means a lot to me.”

Raven spoke next.  She was so energized that she had gotten out of her chair and was practically jumping up and down.  “That was incredible!  I loved the fashions!  I don’t have to wish anymore that I could have seen Celestia dress up more than once per year for the Grand Galloping Gala.  So thank you both for that!”

Rarity beamed and flipped her mane.

All eyes turned to Steady Flight, who was still gaping.  An unsympathetic hoof to the side from Trixie seemed to break him out of his stupor. “Mark, that wasn’t you.  I mean…”  He waved a forehoof in front of him as he tried to formulate his words. “…I mean I got to meet Celestia briefly and had a pretty good impression of her personality from attending Day Court a few times.  What you just showed us… the emotions and bearing you had… that just wasn’t you, and it certainly wasn’t Celestia, either.”  He put his hoof down.  “It was like there was a completely different pony on stage that I had never met before.”

I laughed.  “But I’m back now.”

He nodded.  “Yeah, I can see that.  You returned just a minute ago.”

Rainbow Dash scoffed. “You just think so. Wait until you have a chance to fly with him now.  You won’t recognize him all over again.”

The terror I saw on Steady’s face was probably mirrored on my own.  He shook his head.  “No thanks! I’ll take your word for it!”

I likewise demurred.  “Yeah, I’ll pass, thanks.”

The rainbow-hued mare glanced between us, then shrugged her shoulders.  “Alright then, your loss.  All the more for me.”

I reached out a wing and pulled Rarity in for a side hug.  “Thank you again, Rarity.  It’s your generosity that allowed me to enjoy these moments… plus maybe giving me a boot in the plot when I needed one.”

The fashion mare smiled and closed her eyes as she rubbed her cheek against mine for a moment.  In the audience, I saw Fluttershy blink a few times. “Darling, this is exactly what friends do for one another.”  We shared a smile and I realized suddenly how close my lips were to hers.  The noises in the room fell away.  Time seemed to stop and I was only aware of the purple-maned mare.

A new voice cut through the comfortable silence.  “Yes, bravo! Hooray for Friendship and all that!” I snapped back to reality and looked up to see Discord applauding from a lounge chair on the ceiling.  “Great job, everypony!”  He disappeared with a flash to be replaced with a confused Rarity now nursing a margarita from his former spot overhead.  I felt his lion’s paw wrap around my withers.  “I do hate to pop in and run, but I have a friendship problem that requires Mark’s unique perspective.  Ta-ta!” 

Before I could struggle out of his grasp or do more than open my mouth in protest, the world went inside out for a moment.  It was something like the teleportation I had experienced with Twilight, but turned up to eleven, with trippy colors thrown in for that extra added bit of insanity.  When it ended, even then I wasn’t sure if reality had completely re-exerted itself because I found myself inside the most insanely designed house that you could imagine.  Singing teabags floated in formation through the air.  Glowing blue origami cranes flew in the other direction.  Lava flowed on the ceiling.  And that was just the start of the lunacy!  If I wasn’t with the Lord of Chaos, I might have thought that I was going crazy.

Discord blinked and asked, “Why are you wearing that?” 

I glared at him. “It’s Rarity’s.  I did a fashion show of her designs.”

“You did?  I guess I wasn’t paying attention.  Show’s over – I’ll return it.”  With a snap of his talons, I was back to being nude… well, except for the patches covering my cutie marks. 

I realized he must be pretty distracted to be this unobservant.  “What do you want, Discord?”

He frowned, one of his eyelids twitched, and he patted his hand and claw together.  For the first time, I saw him look less than one hundred percent confident.  “Well, I have this personal problem and I realized maybe I had been going about it all wrong.  You see…” 





With a flash, I found myself leaning back in a burgundy Queen Anne leather high back chair (thanks for the antique lessons, Phil), a notepad in one hoof and a quill in the other.  My legs were crossed and I was positioned to look down over Discord who was reclined on his back on a low couch in front of me.  I glanced at the notepad.  In uneven letters, the words on it spelled out, ‘JuST plAiN NuTS!’ 

The draconequus waved a paw.  “It started soon after I was released from my stony prison.  Over the course of the ensuing months, the feeling got stronger and stronger.  But… no matter what I do…” his voice dropped off, his ears drooping.

I sighed then finished his sentence. “…no matter what you do, Fluttershy continues to treat you just as a friend and doesn’t ever seem to see you ‘that way’. ”

He blinked up at me in surprise. “You knew?”

I snorted.  “Discord, I think Fluttershy is the only one who doesn’t, but none of her friends wants to interfere.”  I paused. “I’m a bit surprised that you came to me with this problem.”

He waved his claw dismissively. “Take it as a measure of my desperation, then.  Plus, you have your pick of dozens of mares and stallions.”  I frowned but he didn’t look back this time.  I supposed he was not trying to be insulting.  He continued, “I just have the one.  And yes, I’ve discussed this with the Pink Princess of Passion.  She recommended just telling Fluttershy, but for all that alicorn knows about love, she doesn’t know the Element of Kindness very well.” 

He sighed.  “How would I know whether Fluttershy is just being nice out of pity or true affection?  I really, really want Flutters to realize on her own how she feels about me, if that would even be possible. Well, how I hope she feels about me.”

I frowned and set the notepad and quill aside.  “I find myself agreeing with Cadance on this.  Fluttershy is honest, Discord.  She deserves for you to deal with her honestly, as well.”

Discord was silent for some time.  “I know,” he said.  “And what is most important to me is her happiness.  But as long as you keep waffling like the popular girl in high school who can’t decide which date gets to take her to prom, that still means I have a chance.”

I didn’t like the analogy, mostly because it sounded more accurate than I wanted to admit.  “Actually, I was about to choose Rarity just before you kidnapped me for this little talk.”

“Reallllllly?” The mismatched creature leaned out of his couch and held his talons up, ready to snap them.  His eyes were very bright.

I smirked.  “But you had to interrupt.  The moment’s gone now.”

He deflated and lay back down. “Harrumph!  Figures.  I’ve always had a lousy sense of timing.  Goes with the job description.”

“Look, Discord – you must know much more than I do because you can presumably access all the self-help books both here and back home.”

“…and in a billion more universes, mortal. For every tidbit of advice, there is an opposing view.”  He proceeded to change his voice for each sentence.  “Treat her like a princess… Treat her with no respect at all… Buy her something she always wanted… Whatever you do, don’t buy her anything… Become what she idolizes most… Be true to yourself…”  He sighed and returned to his normal voice.  “Fat lot of good omniscience does when all the advice is contradictory.”

I leaned back into the chair.  It was very, very comfortable.  “Tell you what.  In exchange for this chair, I’ll give you my best advice.”

The couch and he poofed away, to be replaced with a copy of the same chair with Discord sitting in it.  He was smoking a pipe and dressed in a deep red jacquard smoking jacket over black silk pajamas.  He nodded sagely for me to continue.

“How well do you know her?  Have you asked about the moment she got her cutie mark? How much do you know about her family and how she grew up?  Have you learned the names and personalities of all the animals she cares for?  If you want to be that much a part of her life, you need to really get to know who she is… without creeping her out!”  I suddenly remembered stalkers.  “Just don’t go poking into anything she would consider intimate; you know, anything she would rather you ask about rather than find out through spying on her, past or present.” 

I looked at my hooves for a few moments while I thought. “Look, if you commit yourself to do something special, she might see you differently because of all the time and effort you put into it. When have you seen her the happiest, or the most emotionally involved in what she was doing?”

The Lord of Chaos’ eyes widened and a grin appeared on his face.  “Yes! Yes, I think that might do it!  It will take some doing to not just snap my claws and make it happen, but I believe I can arrange it.”  He beamed at me and clapped his hands.  My chair disappeared and I fell to the ground on my rump with a painful thump. 

Discord said, “Thank you again, Monseigneur Wells.”  His smile turned a bit nasty and I was sure the lighting in the room darkened.  “And may the best male win.”

The world turned inside out again and I was on Rarity’s stage once more.  Discord was standing on my left, still with his arm around me.  His firm grip kept me from falling over in my dizziness. Rarity waved at Discord from her spot on the ceiling while Twilight was directly underneath the fashionista.  The alicorn’s horn was glowing and she had a puzzled look on her face. 

“Discord, darling!  You have to give me the recipe for this drink!  I simply must serve this at my next fashion show.”

The draconequus waved back as he handed me a bottle pulled out of his ear.  “I’m sure Mark here can mix up a batch for you.  Well, we had a l-o-v-e-ly chit-chat, but now I must be going.  More special order furniture to deliver.  Busy, busy, busy!”  With a snap of his talons, he was gone once more.  Rarity floated gently to the ground in Twilight’s magic.  The alicorn even managed to not spill a drop of the fashion mare’s drink. 

I looked over the bottle.  The label was missing but raised letters in the glass declared “JOSE CUERVO – 1795 – HECHO EN TEQUILA.”  It seemed Discord had a taste for some items from my home world.  If he was unwilling to send me back, I wonder if I could ask for some buffalo wings next time?

With a flourish of trumpets sounding from who-knows where, the burgundy chair appeared behind me and I sank into it with relief.  It was just as comfortable as back in Discord’s house, and I wriggled in pleasure, grinning from ear to ear at the audience.  “Gotta hand it to the Lord of Chaos – he has the comfiest furniture!” Surprisingly though, no pony appeared to be envious of my new acquisition. 

“Mark, dear,” said Rarity. “Is that a leather chair?” 

I blinked.  “Yes? … And?”

Twilight cleared her throat.  “Leather is a banned material except for a very small allowance used for specialized applications.  You do know that some cows are sapient here in Equestria?”

Rarity nodded.  “I’m afraid it just isn’t legal to own such an item, despite its obvious refined appearance.”

I covered my face with my forehooves and groaned.  I just couldn’t win.  “But they aren’t in my homeworld!  That’s where this chair comes from!”

Trixie strode up.  “Never fear, Spark Seashells.  The Great and Clever Trixie knows exactly how to dispose of your evil monstrosity.”

I gripped the arms of the chair possessively.  “No! Anything but teacups!”

She smirked.  “Your wish is granted.”





I glowered.  I didn’t want to be here, but I wasn’t going to let this happen without me seeing it off.

With a flourish, Rarity removed the drape covering the beautiful chair that was fated to never again feel my sit-mark. The griffon ambassador next to me gasped.  “Lady Rarity! What a marvelous piece of furniture!  The artistry and craft put into its design are without equal.” Well, at least she had good taste.

The griffoness looked up.  “You outdo yourself, even with your title as Element of Generosity.  I simply cannot accept such a fine gift.”

I interrupted.  “Ah, but first you should try it on for size before turning it down, don’t you think, ambassador?”

She turned to look at me, then to Rarity who motioned for her to try out the chair. 

Hesitantly, the griffoness did so and sighed contentedly.  “Oh, this is even more comfortable than I had imagined.”

I nodded.  “There is something about a finely-crafted leather chair that defies easy description.  The way it molds around you and grips you just so.  The smell of the tanner’s art combines with the incomparable cool feeling of leather.  I do hope you can enjoy it the way it is meant to be enjoyed.”

Rarity walked up to my right and cocked an eyebrow at me briefly then turned to face the chair and its very happy occupant, if her purring was any indication. “Indeed.  Griffons have been friends to Equestria for generations. This is a small way our kingdom expresses gratitude for our alliance.”

I knew Ambassador Redfeather was sold. Ah well, maybe the next set of trade negotiations would be a lot more favorable to Equestria.


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