Eighth Chapter: Equestria Found
A smile crept across her face as she read the note; she’d known he wouldn’t simply wait to die. After all, she’d tried to kill him before. Even so, he surpassed her expectations, for there wasn’t a false word to be seen! And although it felt bad to mislead her sister, she did decide to scroll back the timeline of the escape. She knew the bat-ponies wouldn’t contradict her, for it was she they served.
Yes, Phillip had left before her return. The letter itself would serve as proof in this new context, for it stated, “To Her Highness Princess Luna, I regret to inform you that I can no longer stay as your guest. An urgent matter has come to my attention and though it saddens me, it is imperative that I leave in your absence. I enjoyed our time together and am very happy that my little gesture went as far as it did. You are no longer alone. Your sister whom you have expressed great love for is with you now. I wish the best of happiness for you. It is also my hope that I see you again someday and keep true to my boast! –Your Faithful Subject, Phillip”
Meanwhile, Phillip himself was stealthily slinking through a forest near Canterlot. The poor bat-pony who’d brought him had a mini-panic attack and decided to stay mum about the event. He was relieved as it became apparent later on that his princess wasn’t interested in the details of how her guest had escaped. But this isn’t that random bat-pony’s story...
Phillip couldn’t believe he’d made it. Sneaking around the unknown woods of an unknown land was a bit on the scary side. He was out of breath and his heart was going a million miles per hour, but he was certain now that he was alone. Unfortunately, he was a lot more alone than he thought. It seemed he’d gotten mixed up during his evasive maneuvering.
That night our hero camped out in the wilderness, and in a dream within a dream Phillip heard his father saying, “Phillip, use the television.” Upon awaking he remembered he had watched a marathon of Man VS Wild on TV not long ago. For several days and nights Phillip wandered around the labyrinthine forest, but all was well. Television always comes through in a pinch.
Though Phillip knew he must be in Equestria, he didn’t yet feel victorious. He hadn’t seen a single pony, after all. Still, his resolve was stronger than ever and his luck was about to change once again. As he bathed under a waterfall one morning he heard a peculiar voice.
“Never before have mine eyes seen a naked monkey, most obscene! Of rareness I am certainly sure, oh naked monkey where’s your fur?”
With a startle Phillip covered his genitals and stooped into the river, but his embarrassment changed to excitement as he saw the pony, then to disappointment because it wasn’t a pony it was a zebra. “Hello.”
“Now I’m speechless! I’m in shock! How can a simple monkey talk?” the rhyming zebra exclaimed.
“I’m not a monkey,” replied Phillip, “I’m an ape, and I’m not simple. I’m a complicated fellow.”
After introductions Phillip asked about any ponies nearby. The zebra, named Zecora, explained that a little town called Ponyville wasn’t that far off.