I was all set to go kick some eldritch ass, but got distracted by the library.
Since Yona had smashed it and basically gutted the building, I’d noticed that it seemed to open up some passages beneath the building that I hadn’t seen before.
“What do you think this is?” Twilight said as I poked around what little of the tunnels I could see with a small flashlight.
I wasn’t about to go any deeper into an unknown place without preparing first. This was Equestria, that would be stupid. There could be tentacle monsters.
“Not sure,” I said, answering her question. “I’m going to get to the bottom of it, though.”
I was actually kind of embarrassed that I didn’t know about these tunnels, particularly since they seemed to be running directly under the library. I had concentrated so much on land, air, sea, and undersea that I’d never really thought about underground.
I heard the sound of a suplex and glanced up into what used to be the library’s front room. Sunset had Sunburst in a chokehold.
“What’s he doing here?” I asked.
Sunburst made a gasping noise. I’ve gotten pretty good at communicating with people while they’re being choked, so I knew he was saying “Science.”
“Why? What science?”
More gasps that translated to “Spelunking unknown and possibly historically significant caverns.”
Excellent. Someone to send in first so I didn’t actually have to prepare myself. I gestured for Sunset to let him up.
He dusted himself off and worked a kink out of his neck before picking his way down into the basement over the rubble of the upper floors.
I made a sweeping gesture, inviting him forward and towards the caves. “Be my guest.”
He paused, though. “While you’re here, you owe me a favor.”
“What?”
“I disarmed Foxy. You owe me a favor.”
Shit, he was right. I had said that. I ground my teeth. “What do you want?”
He paused, as if he didn’t think he would get this far and didn’t have anything in mind. Then, he said, “I want to know the deal with Libby.”
“Are you sure? Wouldn’t you rather know what I did with Starlight Glimmer?”
Sunburst hesitated, torn in decision.
Suddenly, though, a tentacle reached out of one of the caves, grabbed him, and pulled him in.
“Huh,” I said. “Well, I guess I’m not going in there.” Also, I’d like to thank tentacles for the work they do, which is a phrase that I bet has not been said very often.
“We have to rescue him!” Twilight protested.
“I wasn’t prepared to go in before, and now that we know it’s got monsters in it, I think I’m going to need a little more prep time.”
She shot me a look and then grabbed her costume. “Yona! Owlowiscious! Come on!”
Costumed up, Mystic, Super Cow, and their bad-at-magic owl headed for the tunnels.
I dusted my hooves off. “I love it when a plan comes together that doesn’t involve any effort on my part.” Still, though, instead of an impromptu rescue, I had been hoping Twilight and I could do some magical DEVGRU stuff today as prep for the intended eldritch ass kicking.
At least until a tentacle reached out of a tunnel and grabbed me.
Not for long - it’s me, after all. I had a sword ready to go. The problem was, as is often the case with tentacles, there were more.
As I was alternately slicing and being grabbed, Sunset was doing her part by blasting the rest. Shortly, whatever intelligence the tentacles possessed decided that I wasn’t worth the effort and retreated.
“They’re not going to get away that easily!” I charged down the tunnel.
Chasing the tentacles back to where they came from, I stopped short as I found myself in a crystal cavern. Strange place to find one, under Ponyville. Sunset stopped beside me.
There was a sparkle in the air and Twilight appeared. Well, no, it wasn’t really. Whoever this was looked a lot like Twilight but was transparent and floating midair. Also she had wings, though she wasn’t using them despite the floating.
I pointed. “What the hell is this? I thought we stopped this.”
“I am the Tree of Harmony,” she said.
“No you’re not.”
“Yes I am.”
“Then why do you look similar to Twilight Sparkle?”
“Because trees aren’t really the kind to come speak to you in person,” she said. She? It? Whatever.
“But why take the form of Twilight? We’ve already got at least two of those.”
“I am the Tree of Harmony. Is she not the pony most in tune with harmony?”
I shook my head. “That makes her special? And what’s with the wings?”
“If Twilight were to realize her true potential, she could become the Princess of-”
“I know, I’ve stopped that once, but why do you have wings? Twilight doesn’t.”
“In an ideal world, one built by friendship and-”
“Yeah, I’m going to stop you right there. I know where ‘ideal world’ monologues usually go.”
I turned to Sunset. “Sunset, choke that bitch.”
Sunset did.
You may wonder how Sunset was able to get her hooves around the astral projection of a tree. So did I, but I value results over methods.
I headed on down the tunnel, though I wasn’t sure if Treelight had been the source of the tentacles or not. They did look like they could have been plant-based, so maybe.
I came upon Mystic, Super Cow, and Owlowiscious engaged in some sort of orgy.
I frowned. Okay, maybe not, there wasn’t any penetration.
Not that there would be any considering who was involved.
I cleared my throat. “Uh, what’s going on?”
“Preemptive body heat sharing to ward off a sudden chill,” Twilight replied. “The Storm King is coming!”
“Who’s the Storm King?”
“Uh…” Twilight looked at Yona. “You said you saw him.”
“Storm King threaten hippogriff land and Yona thought saw his shadow,” said Yona. “Storm King bad. He threaten land forever.”
“Forever?”
“For-ev-er.”
I looked around. There weren’t any obvious Storm King-shaped shadows. No Wendy Peffercorn, either.
The Storm King must have been one of those things that I missed when the universe took a jump. “Okay, well, it doesn’t feel too chilly right now. You can stop snuggling.”
“I mean, I wasn’t into it at first, but this is kind of nice, I guess,” said Twilight. She got up, though.
“What happened to the tentacles?” I said.
“We were more concerned about Sunburst.”
I shrugged.
“Well, presumably if we find one, we find the other,” Twilight went on. She gestured. “Further down the tunnel, probably.”
“Do you know how far?” I asked.
“No. Who knows how far these tunnels might extend?”
“I might have an idea.” I tapped my earpiece. While it wasn’t going to reach directly through the ground above, maybe I could get a signal to Sunset’s communicator, which could then pass it through the base station I’d installed in on the roof of the library, and then to Tin Mare.
Apparently the systems were still up and I explained to Tin Mare what I was thinking.
“May I suggest the best way to map the tunnels would be a concussive blast?” she said. “I can use my internal diagnostic vibration units as improvised seismic sensors.”
Tin Mare with her new operating system was amazing. “Sounds good.”
Tin Mare presumably landed somewhere above. I pulled out some C4 and rigged it to the most solid-looking rock I could find. That done, we pulled back.
We met up with Sunset and she dragged the Treelight apparition up to the surface with us.
I set off the explosives and it generated enough directional vibration through the tunnels to give Tin Mare a reading.
“One of the longest tunnels comes out near a place called the Peaks of Peril,” she reported after a moment to process.
“Maybe that’s where it took Sunburst,” said Twilight.
Twilight the superhero nerd one, not the tree one. I’d already temporarily gotten rid of the original one to Silent Hill, but we were getting back up to too many again.
“I’m a little torn,” I said. “One, I’m angry at the tentacles and want to burn them. Two, but if I do, Sunburst might think we were rescuing him.”
“But then the favor you owe him would be negated,” Sunset pointed out.
“Huh, that is true. Okay, I guess we’re going.”
We started packing for the trip. I figured the Elements might as well go along. They’d seen a lot of shit. Also, I thought that if Rarity was into eldritch things, then she probably had a handle on tentacles.
Oh right, we still had to deal with the eldritch things. Eh, it’s not like it was that big a deal.
Maud was with Rarity when she showed up. She, along with Trixie, Daring, the six Element Bearers, and Sunset all assembled for the mission.
I looked at them all. “Jeeze, talk about a taco fest.”
Sensing that the statement would only send Pinkie on a tangent (was it Tuesday?) I quickly went on. “All right people, we’re going to putter to the Peaks of Peril to pull to pieces a particular plant, permanently.”
“I don’t putter,” said Tin Mare.
“Sorry.”
“What’s this about a plant?” said Applejack.
“Some tentacle vines have taken up residence in some tunnels under Equestria,” I said. “Some of them run for quite a distance, but we managed to map them.”
“You could have just asked me,” said Maud.
Shit, that made sense. “Well, we’ll let you take the lead on the geology consulting when we get there.”
“I have a question too,” said Trixie. “First of all, hi mom.”
“Hello,” said Sunset. It was the first time Trixie had seen her since she’d gotten back.
“Who’s that you’re choking?” Trixie asked.
Sunset glanced down. “The spirit of the Tree of Harmony, apparently.”
Before that could invite any questions, I clapped my hooves. “Okay, it sounds like we’re ready to go.”
“Wait,” said Rarity. “What about-”
She was interrupted by a mare who was colored two shades of green walking by just then. I’d never seen this pony before.
Sunset apparently knew her. Her hooves were already full, though. “Valiant, choke that bitch.”
I did.