//------------------------------// // Episode 25: Better Call Sombra // Story: Life of a Wanted Changeling Season 4: At Luck's End (Comment Driven Story) // by BrownDog77 //------------------------------// “Nice to meet you,” she smiles. “So, why are you looking for magic stuff?” “Eh, it’s complicated,” you shrug. “Heh, that’s what Adagio always says when people ask,” she nods in understanding. “And if they get too pushy we just sing and they go away.” You raise a brow at that. “They don’t like your singing?” “Oh no, they love our singing. Their eyes glaze over in wonder of it. Want to hear?” she asks suddenly eager. “Nah,” you wave off. “I’ve recently gotten used to random music numbers not going off every day. It’s the one good thing of this forsaken place, I’ll give it that.” “Oh, OK then, maybe next time,” she nods and takes a bite out of her taco. No thank you, you shudder. The last thing I want is to hear human music. They’re probably just hack versions of our songs but with human centric words. And as you think upon the possible butchering of classics via hummies… Down with Chrysalis’s Comment Puzzling Frost’s Comment There’s suddenly a loud slam coming from B2's table. Well that lasted longer than I expected it to, you hear Selena facehoof. You and Sonata turn your attention back to B2's table and see that Sombra was the one to slam his hands down on the table. He's also now angrily standing up as B2 just gives him a deadpanned look. What happened Roomba? I don’t know, your doppelganger asked mine who he thought he was with that attitude, Sombra responds in confusion. "I'm not doing this Sombra, this wasn't funny the first time," B2 says with a roll of his eyes to which Humbra ignores. "Shut up, you know exactly who I am," he growls menacingly. B2's deadpanned stare doesn't leave his face as he says, "Yeah, I do. You’re my ex-band mate who’s got an unhealthy craving for crystals. Now can you please-" "That's right, and I'm the man who’s moved on from that stupid band unlike your sorry drunken homeless ass." B2's blank face falters slightly as his eye twitches in annoyance. "No, just…no. Seriously man enough you’re drawing a crowd, sit down already will ya?" Humbra doesn't falter however as he simply growls out, "Say my name, and maybe I will." “Really? You’re gonna do this now?” B2 asks in frustration. Humbra just glares behind his spectacles. “Say my name,” he asks with menace. After a few seconds of the glare, B2 lets out a frustrated sigh and grumbles out, "You’re Sombra, King of the Crystals and a pain in my ass." Human Sombra smirks before he finally sits down and smugly says, "You’re God Damn Right...now what were we talking about?" “Certainly not your humbleness, that’s for sure,” B2 grumbles. At your table, you and Sonata just stare in confusion at this bizarre scene. "So...what was that about?" the girl asks. "I...I honestly have no idea." It was a play of superiority. Obviously even in this world I command fear and respect from you worthless peons, Sombra says high and mightily. Coming from the guy who has no body. You Ate Me Bucker! Quit squabbling you two, Selena rolls her eyes. Focus on what’s important. “I mean, did you really have to go and rip off his entire shtick? It’s embarrassing if your cosplay is your normal wear.” “I’ll have you know my clothing is not indicative of that amazing show, nor am I obsessed with it.” “How can you say that with a straight face?” …If they ever get to anything important that is, she facehooves. “Soooo, how do you know those two guys?” Sonata asks as the two humans start to argue about something else petty. “Uh…the orange haired one’s my…twin brother,” you lie. “Ooo, twins huh? I wish I had a twin, then she’d not yell at me and leave me alone in malls,” she says nonchalantly as she starts eating again. You turn to her again and still see how blatant she is with familial abandonment. “Are your sisters really that bad?” you ask in concern. "Eh,” she shrugs. “They’re family, what you gonna do? Adagio, my older sister, kinda leads the three of us. It's cause of her smarts that we've been able to get past some really tough times this last year. Aria may be younger than me, but she is the most protective and aggressive out of the three of us. Heck, she even learned two local fighting styles called Karate and Taekwondo and got this fancy black belt from both within months, how cool is that?” She smiles again and munches on her taco. Whoa, this Aria girl went to two different fighting schools and is already a master? I pity whoever crosses her, you shudder. Why do I get this sudden sense of dread that multiple beings are laughing at us right now? Selena deadpans. Eh, could be a number of reasons, you answer. But still, the fact that hummies have Karate and Taekwondo is troubling, it means that some filthy ape might have some of my moves. “But yeah,” Sonata continues. “They may be jerk heads now and again, but they’re still my sisters and I love them. Besides I am pretty silly and clumsy, so I can understand why they get mad at me.” She then lets out a sad sigh and slumps her shoulders. You suddenly feel sympathy for this human girl just like how you did for Human Twilight. Dang you humans and your relatable problems! You may be ugly, but the pain still hits you the same. “Hey hey now, there’s nothing wrong with being an airhead,” you say. “There’s not?” she asks with a raised eyebrow. “Heck no. Look at me, I’m what one would consider a ditz. I make stupid, brash, emotionally charged decisions with no forethought to consequences all the time…” So you DO admit it, Selena points out with a quick laugh. I am what I am. “But just because I’m an airhead, doesn’t mean I’m dumb. An idiot sure, but I’m not dumb. You get what I’m saying?” She nods her head yes before saying, “No, I’m confused.” “That’s alright. Just think about it this way, when you’re considered the ditzy one, no one will see your pranks of vengeance as premeditated, they’ll just think “oh it’s that clumsy mess again” and not give it a second thought.” “Oooohhh, she says as a light goes off in her head. So what you’re saying is I can get away with anything as long as it looks like an accident because they already think little of me?” “Exactly. I once “accidentally” put mustard in the unit wash instead of detergent, and they just chocked it up to me being an idiot,” you smile trollishly. “Hmm, I doubt Aria would ever suspect me of turning her clothes pink on purpose…Thanks for the idea,” she perks up. “No problem. Just remember, no one ever suspects the Ditz.” Some hundred miles away, two Sirens in human form shudder in dread. “OK, but even if I do own it, I still want to be taken on searches with them, that’s why I want to find that mirror and prove I can do it,” she informs. “Yeah, OK, I can see your point on that,” you nod. “Once I find that mirror, we’ll hit the payday as Adagio likes to call it, and then we can hunt around for more together.” “How many have you found so far?” you ask. “…None actually. But we’re always on the lookout day and night,” she admits and your shoulders slump. Well, the chances of her being right just went down significantly. A loose lead is better than none at all my bug, Selena informs. True, true, you nod and look at the blue girl. “Maybe you should just focus on school, get better grades than them and be the scholarly one,” you suggest. “If they’re hunting magic day and night, then you’ll easily be able to overtake them if you study.” “Study at school? But there’s no groups of fish around here. I don’t even know where this ocean is,” she says innocently. “No, no, I’m talking about High School,” you clarify. “…Like flying fish?” she asks. “No not, huh?” you say taken aback. “Don’t you know what High School is? A large building full of teens trying to survive social cliques, bullies, and maybe learn enough book stuff to have a future?” “Uhhhh” she trails off, clearly lost to what you’re saying. Huh, maybe she is as airheaded as she said. “Didn’t you learn like, numbers and stuff with other fil-Kids?” “Oh yeah, when I was younger. We learned all the essentials like singing, other cultures, fish…” she starts listing off on her fingers, “But after that we decided to set out to take the world by storm with our singing…It didn’t work out so well,” she says downtrodden. So she and her sisters stupidly didn’t go to school, tried to become idols and failed so now they hunt magic artifacts, yeesh. Indeed, if anything they should find more steady jobs to support themselves, Selena observes. Would you two be quiet I'm trying to listen to them over there! Sombra growls, causing you and Selena to return your attention back to the matter at hand. As you look, you see things are heating up a little over with your counterpart. "Wait wait wait, so you’re telling me that another you, from another dimension has come over here and roped you into a treasure hunt while also getting you sober and a job AND you're helping because it will give him the ability to get his version of me and Nightmare out of his head? Did I get that right??!!??" Humbra asks in disbelief looking at B2 like he had sprouted a second head that was screaming, on fire and had a pink mustache. "Yeah that's pretty much it," B2 nods causing you and Selena to facepalm/hoof. Nice job being discreet B2! By your own admission he is as ditzy as you, Selena groans. Human Sombra continues to stare at you double for several long heartbeats before he pinches the bridge of his nose and squints his eyes. "I don’t know what the hell you’re on, but I'm not high enough for this s***t,” he deadpans. “I told you, I’m sober now. And besides, booze was my vice, you’re the one that always went for the harder stuff, though I’m guessing since you have all your teeth you’ve cut back?” “Yeah yeah,” he nods and rubs his eyes. “Just the legal stuff that I can get with my medical card. But come on man, you can’t possibly expect me to believe that bullcrap you just slung.” “I don’t care if you believe it or not, I just gave you the truth,” B2 shrugs. "Alright, alright, alright. Even if I was to believe you about all of this, what do you need me for?" Sombra asks pointing accusingly at B2. “Well back in the other world, the other you had some magicy mirror or something, so were wondering if you did too?” “Wha-I…If I had a magic mirror, why the hell would I still be living in that one bedroom hellhole instead of getting rich off of it?” he fires back. “I don’t know, maybe you didn’t know what you had?” “I didn’t acquire any stupid mirror,” Human Sombra grunts. “Well crud, there goes that idea,” B2 slumps in his chair. “Well maybe you can still help us out?” “Oh, you and your imaginary twin?” “He’s not imaginary, he’s over there,” he points to your table. “Uhhh…” you stammer as he focuses his attention on you. “Hi!” Sonata says as she waves her hand rapidly at the two humans. Not having any better idea, you wave as well. Sombra looks at the two of you in confusion before looking back to B2. “…That serial killer looking guy in the raincoat and bandanna is you from another dimension? Really?” “OK, right now he’s in disguise, but he does look just like me I swear,” B2 defends. “Right…and the teenage girl with him?” he insinuates. “I…don’t know actually. Must have picked up a stray in the last 10 minutes.” “Oi!” you rebuke, but they ignore you. “Alright, whatever game you’re playing here I want no part of it,” Sombra grunts and stands up. “I don’t have your damned mirror, have a good day, and stay the hell out of my life if you know what’s good for you.” He then starts to walk away, but B2 stands up and walks towards him. “Come on Sombra, you’re the only one that can help us,” he pleads. “Oh right, just like that time you came begging at my door for 12 Grand and you got all mad when I didn’t just fork it over?” he accuses. “It’s not about money, it’s about doing what’s right.” “Heh, we ain’t done a single thing right in the last 10 years,” he shakes his head. “And why would I be the only one to help you?” “Because even if you don’t know where the mirror is, you know crystals. Even back then, I know you had your precious little rock collection, and I’m willing to believe you’ve added since then.” “Don't talk s#!t about my crystals!” he growls. “And even if I still do, what’s it to you?” “Well there are other magic things in our world apparently, and from what I’ve gathered he’s looking for, they’re some kind of gem or something,” B2 informs. “If anyone could help us find them, it’s you.” “Oh, so now you want me looking for magic crystals huh? How dumb do you think I am?” he grunts and B2 sighs. “Alright fine, I didn’t want to have to pull this but,” he steels himself and looks Sombra dead in the eye. “You still owe me a favor from the whole Dr. Sombrero incident.” Human Sombra’s annoyed expression immediately turns to one of terror as you somehow hear a guitar playing in the distance. You also hear your Sombra gasp in fright. "You/He wouldn't dare!" Both Sombra's say at once. "Try me," B2 says with a cheeky grin. Dr. Sombrero? Care to elaborate? Selena asks with a smirk. Say one more word, and I'll show you why I am the King of Fear! Sombra sneers. OK, yeesh, touchy subject much? Apparently so, Selena rolls her eyes. Whatever it is, apparently it’s an even that reaches across space and time. “If you say, one God Damned word of that to anyone, I will show you why I am the King of Fear!” Human Sombra threatens B2. Whoa, déjà vu much? Kersey475’s Comment Kichi’s Comment “I won’t have to Sombra, if you just decide to help an old “friend” out,” B2 insinuates. Human Sombra grinds his teeth which even you can hear several tables away. “Fiiinnnneeee,” he growls under his breath. “I’ll help you with your stupid delusions. But after this, we’re square, understood?” “Crystal,” B2 smirks and Sombra clenches his teeth more at the pun. "I guess I shouldn’t have expected less from you you two faced bastard. Your attitude is why the band died anyway. Didn't have your fill betraying Nims with that Chrysalis skank, so now you gotta-“ Before you can even blink, B2 leans forward and wraps his arm around Sombra, pressing a toothpick against the back of his neck. "You mention her name or that traitorous bitch again, I'll demonstrate the technique Grandpappy taught me that will make all the blood in your body pool up in your head and spill out of every available hole there is. Got it?" he threatens in a low angry tone. "That's just a movie," Sombra scoffs. "I know, Grandpappy was an adviser on that movie while undercover on one of his black ops missions. Where do you think they got the technique from?" B2 growls as he presses the toothpick tighter while staring Sombra right in the eyes. "Okay, okay! I won't mention them again!" Sombra says hurriedly. B2 then slinks back and tosses the toothpick behind him landing perfectly in a trash can on the opposite side of the food court. “Good, now that that’s understood, we can move on and be friends again.” …Nice to know even this idiot copy of yours has some steel in him, Selena comments sounding impressed. I know right? I guess my human’s superiority play was better than yours. Shut up! Sombra grumbles. I can’t believe he was cowed so easily… Human Sombra takes a few deep breaths and looks B2 right in the eye. “Very well. Let’s move on. And on the flip side, don’t speak to me about Hope.” “Yeah, alright. And again, sorry about tricking you into thinking she was gonna be here. I actually haven’t seen her in years.” “Heh, you and me both,” Sombra sighs and looks down sadly. “I should have been better to her…” There is a very loud pause from all of you at that, and your Sombra takes a sharp intake of breath. “Ummm…I know you just said not to say anything but…” B2 prods and Sombra just grunts. “What do you think happened? We weren’t rock stars anymore, and I took more crystal to cope. She told me to stop and I didn’t, so she left. I quit too late, end of story.” “Alright…” B2 says awkwardly and leans back on his heels a bit. “Listen, I don't like you, you don't like me, but hopefully we can get this over with quickly before something else crazy happens today, knock on wood." B2 moves to knock on the table, but Sombra grabs his wrist. "I am the one who knocks." Sombra growls before he knocks on the table as B2 rolls his eyes. “Whatever, before we can begin though, do you want to finish lunch? I can introduce you to my double.” “I don’t care if you’ve found a look alike or not, you ain’t gonna convince me of your fantasy,” Sombra grunts before he sits back down. “You want to discuss crystals? Let’s discuss crystals,” he says as he brings out a book that reads “Crystals of the World.” “…Do you seriously just carry that around everywhere you go? Dude, you are seriously obsessed,” B2 says as he sits back down. “I’m not obsessed!” Human Sombra shouts. And as the two of them look through his book while eating, Sonata taps you on the shoulder. “Hey, I’m done with lunch, and it looks like their fight is over for now. I’m gonna go start looking for the mirror,” she says as she picks her tray up. Just_another_guy’s Comment “Oh, OK. What side of the mall are you going to check? I figure my twin and his “buddy” are gonna be busy, so I might as well help.” “Awesome. I’m gonna go that way,” she points to the Western half of the mall. “I might also get some kettle corn while I’m over there.” “Well, I guess I’ll go East then,” you nod as you stand up as well. "Oh Wait! Here's my number," she yelps as she whips out her Little Star Trek looking device. "That way if we find anything related to the mirror we can call each other." You hand here your phone and she types her number. You still have no idea how this Marvel works. "Thanks Sonata" You take your phone back and it says Meermin12 as username with a picture of what you can only assume is Sonata doing a duck lip with the camera held high. You give her a raised eyebrow at the picture. “I know right? These things are so amazing. Every girl takes pictures like this,” she giggles. “I’m not one to question weird trends, so I’ll just move on. But yeah, if you find something, let me know.” “Will do. By Mr. Bugze,” she says as she starts skipping away. You know... I really like her necklace. Of course it reminds me of the elements of harmony, but still it's gorgeous, Selena comments sounding as the human girl leaves. Huh, never took you for the flashy type. A mare can appreciate fine craftsmanship, my old armor was more than just protection after all. Though I'm nowhere near that rag maker’s obsession. Fair point, you nod. I’ll get ya something nice when you’re finally out of my head. I look forward to it, she smiles, Though in the meantime I’d rather just have the Siren stones. Yeah, yeah, I’m working on it. Though with her being a contact and Human Sombra’s crystal obsession, we might find more magic stones like the one I took from Gloriosa. Kichi’s Comment The Pony Spartan’s Comment We should be careful in that regard Selena states. If we get a hold of more magical objects, aside from the stones, they could possibly be used to concentrate our sleeping Nightmare magic. You really think so? You ask intrigued. Yes, that stone was able to activate your Boomstick, and when you held it in your hand, I felt a strange magical surge. I felt as though I was standing behind you when you faced her down. Hmm, that’s weird. Daisy was saying something about seeing a dark horse behind me. What do you think it means? I’m not sure. Right now our magic is not able to be tapped due to your new form, but if we gather more relics, we might be able to tap into that power in some different way. I don’t know how that would work, but it could potentially be dangerous. That makes sense I guess. I’ll keep that in mind, the last thing we want is to hurt some random humie and get Sombra’s bridle in a knot. Surprisingly, Sombra does not take the bait, in fact, he’s been rather quiet. Huh, you OK there Stromboli? Hope…he mutters. I lost her in this world too… Oh…Uh…you pull at your collar in discomfort. Perhaps we should leave him be for awhile, Selena recommends. Yeah…good idea you nod as you walk over to the human’s table. “Oh hey Bugze,” B2 says as you approach. “Care to show your face so this idiot believes me?” “Yeah OK, but I’ve got to go check the mall real quick. That girl at the table just gave me a lead on a possible magic mirror being here,” you say as you take off the fake glasses and bandanna. “Really? Do you want some help looking?” he offers. “Nah, you two keep discussing whatever, I’m gonna go make myself useful,” you wave off before looking at Human Sombra who seems a bit surprised. “Hi Sombra, just gotta say, Pony Version of you was much cooler looking.” You then start walking away. “I’ll let you know if I find anything,” you call back as Humbra looks at your retreating form, his mouth agape. “Alright, good luck,” B2 calls before looking at his Sombra smugly. “Told ya so.” “…It’s just some trick you’ve set up,” Sombra says shaking his head before looking back at his book. “At least I hope it is.” Hope… your Sombra mutters in melancholy as you walk through the mall. IN EQUESTRIA A hooded figure walks through the city of Somnambula.. Looking around, it pulls out a dark stone and talks to it. “Rabia, I’m about to meet with the contact, wish me luck,” comes a sweet sounding female voice. The dark stone pulses faintly with red energy and in her mind, a deep male voice answers. I do not like this. We are following the whims and plans of another instead of our plan. “Well we don’t have much a choice if we want to save Sombra from that horrid Hooded Offender. Whoever they are, this Friend is the only one to reach out to me and give me any idea of how to rescue him,” she says as she pulls out a letter signed A Friend. “We’ll still gather allies that are foes of both that monster and the Elements who would try to banish Sombra as well,” she reassures the stone. “But while we do that, the contact this "Friend" wrote to me about can get the materials needed to extract Sombra before the Hooded Offender’s allies gather them all.” Very well. Though I still do not trust this “Friend” who knows our every goal. “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth Rabia,” the mare giggles as she puts the stone away and enters a ramshackle establishment that is full of tough looking ponies and creatures. Towards the back she finds her mark, a tan earth pony with black hair and a golden skull cutie mark. “Are you Dr. Cabelleron?” asks the hooded mare. “I might be,” answers the stallion in suspicion as his minions at the table shift defensively. “What is it to you?” The hooded mare throws out a large sack of golden bits onto the table, which spills from the top. Cabelleron’s eyes widen before he smiles and looks to the hooded mare in intrigue. “To what do I owe the pleasure of this bounty ma’am?” he asks. The unicorn mare lowers her hood, revealing her white blue mane and light purple face. “I have a job for you…” BACK IN HUMAN LAND After walking around the mall, and switching the raincoat and bandana for that awesome jacket and hat from before, you realize that maybe following the rumors of some random stranger isn’t the best. “There’s got to thousands of stupid mirrors, windows and etc in this dang place. You’d think I’d be able to tell if one is magic or not,” you groan as you sit down on a bench near the indoor fountain. The Pony Spartan’s Comment “I wonder if Sonata’s having better luck,” you say as you look at your phone and see no new messages. Let’s hope not, Selena interrupts. Because if she did, convincing her to take the mirror for yourself might not go as well as you think. Oh right, she and her sisters are obsessed with this kind of stuff…Well it may be dishonest, but let’s hope we find it without her knowing. Heck, the last thing we need is hummies invading the real world, you think with a shudder. But still, this is going to be tough to find either way. And as you think that, a very eerily familiar voice comes from behind you. “You can get through this man. You’re strong, good looking, and other girls would be happy to have you.” “Yeah you’re right,” you nod in agreement. “I am all those things.” “You can move on from this, you don’t need her in your life!” “Yeah, she’s just some random hummie after all, I can do this hunt on my own,” you agree. “She dumped you, but that’s OK. She never loved you anyway, someone else will come along.” “Yeah she dumped me, I…Wait, what? Who the buck am I talking to?” you shake your head and turn around. At a kiosk, you see a orangish human with spikey blue hair, wearing a black jacket with red and white stripes on the sleeves, holding up a blue crystalline mirror and talking to his reflection. “She’s not the girl you thought she was. She’s mean, manipulative, and you will not miss her!” he instructs himself with a shaking hand. “Wait…is that…Flash?” you mutter as you recognize the twisted abomination of your best bro. And just like that, the dam breaks. IT'S HHHIIIIMMMM!!!! THE WAIFU STEALER! DESTROY HIM! BURN HIM! BREAK HIS BONES FAIRLY QUICKLY!!! IN EQUESTRIA Shining Armor sits behind his desk as he goes over preparations for the Princess Summit, when suddenly his door is kicked open by an ecstatic orange pegasus. “Captain! They’re Gone! Oh Sweet Celestia They’re Gone!” he shouts in happiness leaning over the desk. “…Flash, I thought you were taking the correct medication finally,” Shining groans in annoyance. “I AM! But that doesn’t matter now, listen! Just listen will you?!” Flash gestures towards his superior. Deciding to humor him, Shining Armor sighs and listens to the empty confines of his office. “I don’t hear anything Flash,” he shakes his head and looks back at his paperwork. “Exactly!” Flash nods. Shining pauses a moment before he realizes what he’s implying and looks up. “I…I don’t hear any voices telling me to maim and kill you.” “I KNOW! Isn’t it amazing!” Flash sings as he twirls around in happiness which causes Shining to smile. “Well it’s about bucking time. How’d you do it?” “I don’t know! I just felt this enormous weight lift of my shoulders, and suddenly all the ponies around me weren’t looking at me with murderous intent! I asked them if they heard anything and they said no! THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!” “OK, OK, calm down Flash. I know you’re happy, but that just raises the question of where those voices went.” “Who cares?” Flash hoofwaves, “Zecora told me the voices were wrongly targeting me, so that just means they’ve finally found their true target. Whoever that dude is though, I do pity him.” IN HUMAN LAND “YOU’RE THE ONE THE VOICES ARE AFTER!!!” you accuse the teenager who is a mockery of your BFF. “Huh?!” he backs up in alarm seeing your angry reflection in the hand mirror. Turning to you he sees your fists clenched as you shake with the annoying angry voices screaming in your mind. It’s as if they’ve all crashed down upon us at once! Selena cries out in alarm. Who even are these voices? Sombra shrieks. Ignoring them both, you point at the clearly evil counterpart of your buddy. “My bro has had to go through all kinds of Tartarus because of you! Who the buck do you think you are?!” “What? Who are you? What are you talking about?!” the frightened human stammers as he grips the hand mirror and continues to back up. “I DON’T KNOW! ANGRY VOICES HATE YOU! AAAAARRRGGGHHH!!!” you exclaim. WHAT DO YOU DO?