AMICITAS FLIGHT THREE – MISSION DAY 525
ARES III SOL 515
TRANSCRIPT – VIDEO TRANSMISSION FROM ARES IV MAV, BEGINNING 11:14 HOURS (ARES III CLOCK)
CHERRY BERRY: Hermes, MAV, standing by for press event, over.
BETH JOHANSSEN: MAV, Hermes, we read you. Good morning, Commander Berry. You’re a bit early, over.
CHERRY BERRY: Well, Starlight and Mark finished early today, so I thought I’d get this out of the way so we can spend the afternoon in sims.
MARK WATNEY: Hiya, Johanssen!
CHERRY: So I’m ready to answer your questions, whatever you have. Over.
JOHANSSEN: Okay. Let’s start with a light one: “You've been halfway round Mars already, and have seen a lot of rocks. Which one was your favorite?”
CHERRY: Really? Really? (unintelligible angry noises) … I’m sorry, Miss Johanssen, but that is a foolish question. I am not a rock scientist. I know one, but I’m not her. I do not have a favorite Mars rock. I have no love whatever for Mars rocks. I will be very happy if I never see a Mars rock again for the rest of my life!
And couldn’t your newspaper people think of better questions? Favorite rock? That’s like favorite spoon! It’s… just… so… stupid!! What will they ask next, “Are you eager to launch on Sol 551?” Um, YES! Because we HATE IT HERE and want to go HOME!
Look, do you want to know my favorite? Mark, give me Groot.
WATNEY: Here you go.
CHERRY: See this? This will be a cherry tree. When he gets home he will grow lots and lots of delicious cherries. I grew his parent tree from a pit because I needed something to keep me going. I knew there would be no cherries here, but I did it anyway, because I could hope. I could look forward. And now I’m looking forward to taking this home with me. This is my favorite! This is real! Not some stupid rock!
I’m sorry I’m so angry, but if you have any more questions that dumb, you should just not ask. Please go ahead, over.
JOHANSSEN: It’s all right. Let’s try another one: “How tough is it to be a commander of a crew stranded on Mars?”
CHERRY: That’s better. And yes, it’s very tough. I never wanted to be in charge of other ponies. It just ended up that way. I fly things. Flying is what I love most, aside from eating cherries. I don’t love being a boss, but it’s a job that has to be done.
I try to watch out for all my crew, make sure they’re all right and stuff. It’s not easy. This is a dangerous world. Four of us have been injured or made sick, and all of us have come close to dying several times. And all of us sometimes push a little harder than we should. By the way, Mark, how’s your back?
WATNEY: Well, it WAS fine, thanks, Cherry.
CHERRY: Sorry. But the most important part of my job is, when things are serious, I’m the one who has to keep her head clear and calm. It’s not easy at all. I want to scream and run around and yell for help, just like any other pony, but that doesn’t help. Panic catches. Panic from the top explodes. So I put it away, the fear, and I focus on the job. Get the job done. Keep everybody moving, everybody safe, everybody together and on task. I stay calm, and everybody stays calm, and we get the job done.
JOHANSSEN: Okay. Next question: “If you were not commander of your crew, which of them do you want to replace you?”
CHERRY: You know, I tried to quit. They wouldn’t let me. None of them want the job. But Spitfire has a lot of command experience. On the other hoof, the MAV is a human ship, so maybe Mark’s people would be happier if he- Mark!
WATNEY: (leans into camera view, waving hands, shaking head, and mouthing “NO” repeatedly)
CHERRY: Mark, move over! Thank you! Anyway, yes, Spitfire or Mark, those would be my choices.
JOHANSSEN: “Do you feel up to the challenge of commanding your crew during the upcoming escape mission?”
CHERRY: Well, I did just say I tried to quit. Look, none of us expected any of this. Mark was going to be here a month. We were in another world and weren’t going to even land. We all got stuck here without all the stuff we needed. Nobody is ‘up’ to that! But somehow we lived. And we’re going to keep on living. And I’m going to do everything, everything, to make sure my crew gets home alive. No matter what.
JOHANSSEN: “What are your thoughts on witnessing a space craft made by a different species?”
CHERRY: You mean the MAV? It’s beautiful! Well, it was before we began taking it apart, anyway. It’s obvious a very good ship. I’m looking forward to flying it!
JOHANSSEN: “How do you feel about being the first non-human to fly a human spacecraft in the history of our species?”
CHERRY: Well, that’s not certain yet. I have to prove that I’m the best pony to fly first. If I’m not qualified- is that the right word?
WATNEY: That’s it.
CHERRY: If I’m not qualified, then I don’t belong in the pilot seat.
For another thing, you humans rely a lot more on computers than we do. For us computers are very new tech… techno… technology. Your computers can do all sorts of things ours just can’t! Computers talking to each other without wires! Computers that show movies! Even if we go home without taking your computers with us, just the things we’ve seen will change our home! Every pony will want their own computer so they can talk with friends across the country and send them pictures and stuff! Though that might not be a good thing… I know some ponies who would never leave their houses if that were a thing…
WATNEY: Sounds just like a lot of people on Earth, Cherry.
CHERRY: Anyway, back home computer is a back-up. It helps, but pilot has final say. With the MAV, the pilot kinda, um… suggests things to the computer, and the computer makes it happen up to the point that it doesn’t risk the ship.
Major Martinez on Hermes taught me this: “Rule One: never override the computer unless you know something it doesn’t. Rule Two: the computer always knows more than you do. And Rule Three: even computers don’t know everything.” He says this means trust the computer, but don’t be afraid to take over if there’s a darn good reason. It’s not the way I learned to fly, but I can always learn something new.
JOHANSSEN: Okay, this next question is related: “How would you feel if you were told you couldn’t pilot the MAV when it leaves Mars?”
CHERRY: Being honest? Disappointed. I do this because I love to fly. I’m not interested in being on new worlds or stuff. I go to new worlds because I get to fly there. I’ve flown all sorts of stuff, but this is my only chance to fly a human spaceship. And if I don’t get to, it’ll be because I wasn’t good enough to do it. So I have to make myself good enough. And I will.
MELISSA LEWIS: And I’m sure you will, Friendship Actual. This is Lewis speaking. How are you today?
CHERRY: Hello, Commander Lewis! I’m doing well! I’m looking forward to this afternoon’s simulations! Is the interview over?
LEWIS: No, Commander Berry, I just thought I’d take over for the last few questions. Here’s the next one: “Will you feel comfortable being a passenger of a ship that isn't under your command?” And for the record, I intend to make you as comfortable as I can, though Hermes is going to be very cramped on the ride back to Earth. Over.
CHERRY: I’ve been a passenger before. It’s not a big deal. I am sad that I won’t be flying the ship that brought us here, but that can’t be helped. It did its best. Next?
LEWIS: “How do you feel about starting a small cherry orchard when you get home?”
CHERRY: Um… kind of… word, Mark, fighting myself inside?
WATNEY: Conflicted?
CHERRY: I guess? Before I flew I did odd jobs places, including farms. My family owns huge cherry farms. But I didn’t think that was my calling. I didn’t think I was any good at it. But as much as I love flying, now I want to go back to the farm for a bit and try again with growing cherries. Because… well, because it’s different now, I guess.
LEWIS: Last question: “Would you go to Japan for the Cherry Blossom festival?”
CHERRY: I would go anywhere for a cherry blossom festival. Anywhere that isn’t (unintelligible) Mars!
WATNEY: Hear that, Earth? Aliens are coming for your cherries! Lock your pantries! Okay, there’s only one, but she’s REALLY hungry, so watch out!
CHERRY: Maaaaaark!