"Alright, girls!" Scootaloo paced in front of her two friends. "We have to decide who we're going to fight with. I, of course, am going to choose Rainbow Dash!"
"Of course." Apple Bloom said, rolling her eyes. She frowned. "But Ah think Ah have to help Applejack on this one. She's mah sister."
"Huh. Didn't stop you being against her last year." Scootaloo pointed out.
"Well, Ah guess not." Apple Bloom said.
"I want to fight with Rarity, and she's on Dash's team!" Sweetie Belle stated. "And taking over Canterlot might be fun!"
"That's the spirit!" Scootaloo praised. "Lets go see Rainbow Dash and enlist in her army!"
"Cutie Mark Crusader Soldiers, yay!!!"
********************************
Rainbow Dash was busy trying to plan battle strategies with Rarity, Trixie, and Spike when the door to her office burst open and three familiar fillies raced in. They lined up in front of the older ponies(and dragon) and saluted smartly.
"Cutie Mark Crusaders reporting for duty!!" They chorused.
"We want to join up!" Scootaloo added.
"Well, squirt, we can always use good soldiers." Dash said, grinning. "Guys?" She looked to her three advisors.
"I say these three make fine soldiers." Rarity said.
"Let em join, I say!" Spike said.
"Eh, sure, why not?" Trixie put in, waving a hoof dismissively. "Perhaps Trixie can keep them close at hoof so no harm comes to them."
"Well, I'll keep Scoots with me, and Rarity will keep Sweetie Belle, so you can keep Apple Bloom." Dash said.
"Wow!" Apple Bloom said, looking at the magician. "Will ya teach me some tricks??"
"Sure, why not?" Trixie replied with a smirk. "Perhaps Trixie can make you a magician, too. You can be Trixie's Great and Powerful Assistant!"
"I thought that was Starlight." Rarity said. Dash snapped her head around.
"Do not mention that traitor's name in my presence!" She said in irritation. "Or the other one's!"
"What, Fluttershy?" Rarity grinned as Dash scowled deeply.
"All I have done for that pegasus from the time we were fillies," Dash growled. "And she stabs me in the back! Well, she just better hope we don't meet in battle! In fact, she better hope somepony kills her in battle, or I will capture her, and if I do I will have her shot as a traitor!"
"Trixie believes she likes your attitude." Trixie said, grinning. "But isn't that just a little bit drastic?"
"What would you do if your lifelong friend switched sides on you?" Dash demanded. Trixie pondered that.
"Trixie would shoot her with magic." She said. "And perhaps turn her into a flying feathered lemon." All eyes locked on her in astonishment. "What? Trixie can get revenge and have fun doing it without actually hurting anypony!"
"Yeah, ok, whatever." Dash said. "Alright, Crusaders. You know what your orders are, right?"
"I'm with you." Scootaloo said.
"I'm with Rarity." Sweetie Belle said, beaming.
"An' Ah'm with Trixie!" Apple Bloom said excitedly, leaping to the magician's side. "Ah'm her Great and Powerful Assistant!"
"That's Starlight's position." Rarity said, shaking her head, ignoring Dash's glare.
"Well, fine. Then she is Trixie's Second Greatest and Most Powerful Assistant." Trixie said.
"Yes!" Apple Bloom cried. Dash snorted.
"Great." She said. Her eyes locked into Trixie's. "Trixie, I'm warning you. You take good care of her. Anything happens to her on your watch, AJ is gonna kill you. And I don't mean if anything happens in this war. I mean if anything literally bad happens."
"Relax, Rainbow Dash." Trixie said, laying her foreleg over her young assistant. "Trixie will guard her young charge with her life. And that is a promise."
"You better." Dash said. "Alright. For now, you fillies can go on your first mission."
"What is it, Rainbow Dash?" Scootaloo asked.
"Trot to the kitchen and bring us a refill of coffee and cookies." Dash winked. "And milk for yourselves."
The fillies squealed and shot off to complete their mission with gusto.
*********************************
At Sugarcube Corner, Applejack was in Pinkie's party cave under the bakery, strategising. Also present were Pinkie Pie and Starlight.
"Ok. If Ah was Dash, where would Ah hit first?"
"Here!" Pinkie announced. "The bakery is the Defender's main supply of food and drink. They take this place, then Town Hall, they will have control of the whole town!"
"Huh." Applejack said. "That's actually smart. If they beat us here and at Town Hall, Ponyville falls. Huh. Why didn't Ah think of that? Commander Pinkie, station your troops around this bakery. Ah'll go rally a group to surround Town Hall." Pinkie saluted.
"Yes, Ma'am! You heard her, Captain Gummy. Let's prepare to defend Sugarcube Corner!" Gummy gave his usual slow blink before his owner grabbed him up and trotted off. Applejack shook her head. Then she looked to Starlight.
"How safe do ya suppose the bakery is with her watchin' it?"
"General Applejack," Starlight said. "Commander Pinkie will use every means in her power to stop the enemy. Including using whipped cream guns, cupcakes, and whatever else she can think of."
"Well, alright, then." Applejack said. "Lets leave her to it and go set up defenses round Town Hall!" The two mares hurried out of the party cave.
********************************
Meantime, in Canterlot, Twilight, Celestia, and Luna were calmly discussing the war.
"This will not end as quickly as last year." Luna said.
"Oh, no." Twilight agreed. "They'll go on for days. But I honestly don't think Dash's Rebels will make it here. I'll be quite suprised if she does."
"She seems determined to come destroy us." Celestia said in amusement.
"Not to worry. I don't intend to die in this war." Twilight said.
"Nor do I." Luna agreed.
"Have we made sure that no actual harm will come to the Rebels if they make it here?" Celestia asked.
"Yes." Twilight said. "The guards have been briefed and armed with Nerf guns and foam swords. Trust me, nopony will suffer any real harm."
The princesses laughed as they considered the war and how ridiculous, but fun, the whole thing was.
*********************************
"Ok. This is it." Dash gazed intently at her troops. "We take the bakery. And Town Hall. Then the town is ours. Team One, infiltrate and take down. Team Two, stand by. Ready? Move!"
Dash led a charge into Sugarcube Corner. Mrs. Cake shrieked as she saw them. Pinkie Pie leaped in front of them.
"Hold it!" She said, Nerf gun aimed at them. "I'm not afraid to use this! Nopony takes this building. Nopony!"
"Come on, Commander. Surrender peacefully and nopony gets hurt."
"Never!" Pinkie cried. "I will defend this bakery and its owners and every baked good to my last breath!"
"Well, then, we'll have to take it." Dash said.
"I'll never let you take it, General Dashie! Never! I will take you down first!"
She wasn't kidding. Inside of two minutes, with just nerf bullets and baked goods, Pinkie single hoofedly took out over half of the troop Dash had shown up with, and the force of her attacks drove the Rebels to a hasty retreat. The ones who weren't killed, that is.
"Sweet Celestia, she's good!" Dash puffed as she hid behind a building with her surviving fighters. "I almost wish I had her back on my side. Almost."
"Well, one thing is sure," Rarty announced, as she dislodged icing from her mane. "We failed at securing the bakery. Which means we will only have Town Hall, unless our fellow fighters failed too."
Thankfully, the band of Rebels Trixie had led to Town Hall had successfully battled their way inside, overthrown the guards, taken multiple prisoners, and strung up their flag outside on the pole. A dozen Rebels set up headquarters there and had just finished when Dash arrived.
"Good job." She told Trixie.
"Trixie thanks you." Trixie said. "And did the battle for the bakery go as planned?"
"No." Dash huffed. "Pinkie destroyed over half my attacking force. Mostly with cupcakes."
"Well, lets try again."
So Dash reluctantly led her weary troops back to the bakery. Pinkie Pie was nowhere in sight. Only a certain green alligator wearing a tiny battle helmet and mini sword. This time, after laughing at the sight, they successfully took over the bakery and stuck their Rebel flag in the window...then carted off the frightening green guard as a prisoner while he gave an extra slow blink.
The war was starting to look good for them now!