Chapter 23: QWOP.
“Oh my gosh is he alright?” Asked Fluttershy in a panicked voice.
“I don’t know! how do you check a dalek’s pulse?” Said Twilight
“Check the eye.” Suggested Pinkie Pie. “If the light goes out he’s dead. I think.”
Twilight checked Zek’s eye. It was still lit, so assuming what Pinkie said was true he was still alive.
“He’s fine.” Said Twilight. Everypony let out a sigh of relief.
“Thank goodness I thought he was going to kill himself.” Said Fluttershy. “Yeah me too.” said Time Turner. “I wonder what stopped him. He sounded like he was going to.”
“We don’t have time to wonder about it.” Said Twilight. “How about the other dalek, the one Zek shot?” Applejack went over to check.
“Dead as a door nail.” Said Applejack.
“We’d best get out of here before more daleks show up.” Said Time Turner.
“We’re not leaving without Zek!” Said Rainbow Dash.
“Why not leave him? I’m sure his dalek friends will help him.” Said Time Turner. Besides he was going to kill you.”
“They’ll kill him when they find out he shot that other dalek. And besides I won’t leave a friend behind even if he’s been… a jerk.” Said Dash. “He still saved our lives.”
“That’s nice and all, but how can we expect to take him? He’s heavy!”
“Me and Applejack can carry him together in a sling made of rope.” Said Dash. Sure enough Applejack and Rainbow Dash put Zek onto their backs and where able to carry him together.
“Up ya go.” Said Applejack. “Now let’s get out of here.”
***
Zek was sweeting looking at his new set of dark purple legs…
Legs. Why did he have legs? There was no way he could be a pony. It was impossible!
Zek started to panic, swinging his new appendages around at random.
This feeling of panic was not a new emotion, however as a pony it was much more powerful then when he was a dalek.
Oh my Emperor I’m a pony! He thought. It was like a nightmare. He was inferior creature.
“What in the world happened to me! Why am I a pony? Where am I! How did…” He stopped at the sound of somepony taking. Was someone else here? And then he realized that the voice he had heard was his own voice.
“Testing, testing new voice. One. Two. three.” Said Zek. It wasn’t electronic like his other voice. That was so weird. It was deep so it was definitely male. It was kinda creepy to hear that coming from him. However hearing his own voice had calmed him down enough so he could think about what he had to do.
Ok, so I’m now a pony in some strange fog filled world. First he had to figure out where he was before he decided on any other course of action. But to do that he would have to walk. He had never had legs before, but walking should be easy enough I mean ponies do it all the time right? He leaned forward and fell onto his face again. “ Ow.”
“Ok let’s try standing up first. Now which nerve ending connects to where?” It was like using a puppet. He had to figure out which strings connected to what part of his body. He pulled one of these “strings” and that caused him to pushed his head into the ground again.
“Ok that controls the head.” He said dizzily. “Now how about those legs?” He tried a different nerve. His left hind leg straitened out. “Ok that does that. Now what about the right one…
Some time passed and he figured out which nerves connected to which muscles.
“Ok time to try to stand.” He commanded his legs to straiten out. This did nothing, just made his legs jet out in all directions. He was still on his belly.
“That’s not right. Lets try pulling them back in.” His legs pulled back under his body. “Ok I’ll just straiten them out and then I’ll be up.” He straitened his legs. Causing him to jumps though the air and land on his face.
“AAHHHHHH!” He cried out in frustration and pain.
One hour latter.
It had been about an hour and Zek was still trying to stand up.
“I do not understand! I can command a dalek army yet i am unable to stand up! They make it look so easy! Even Derpy could do it!” Zek was about to give up when he remembered Derpy’s speech. What was Zek doing? He was a dalek! He was superior to ponies! Anything they could do, so could he. He gathered his strength. He would stand this time. In the name of the daleks he would not fail. He would triumph! He would succeed! Zek started to stand up slowly. He struggled as he bent his wobbly knees. He stumbled a few time, but his willpower would not be broken, he would stand or die trying.
Finally he did he stand up. He was filled with an emotion that he never felt before. The joy of success!
“YES I DID IT! I SUCCEDED! NOTHING CAN STOP ME! I AM A DALEK. I AM THE BEST I CAME. I SAW. I CO-” In his excitement he almost fell over. Zek tried to make a note that pony mood swings can be distracting, but realized he was not connected to his notes. This was frustrating.
Ok next step. Walking. Very carefully he moved his fount hoof forward.
He heard the sound of groaning behind him. He slowly turned his head. At the edge of the fog he could see what looked like a giant slug with spines sticking out of it’s back. And it was slowly making its way towards Zek.
“Identify yourself.” Said Zek in a clearly pony voice to the slug.
The creature did not respond.
“Identify yourself. Or you will be EXTERMINATED.” Said Zek trying and failing to imitate a dalek.
The creature just groaned and continued to slowly come closer. Zek had a feeling it was hostile.
Under normal circumstances Zek could exterminate it or at least run away easily. But in his current form he was unarmed. He would have to try to run. Good thing the creature was slow.
Zek moved his hoof to try to move forward. He stumbled and fell. Darn it. He spent about a minute to get back up.
He tried walking again and fell again twice spending another two minutes. He looked back the creature it was closer. Now he could tell it was a dark gross brown. It was leaving a red trail snail trail behind it. The trail looked suspiciously like blood.
Zek was getting desperate; he tried two hooves at a time. He extended his them forward. However this caused him to fall onto his belly. Zek could hear the sloshy creature coming closer with its labored breath.
Zek started to panic. He had to get away from this creature. Zek started to move his body randomly trying to get away. It was a little like watching sompony play QWOP. Every movement sent him in a different direction. Sometimes forwards sometimes backwards eventually this strategy caused him to land on his back. It was then he got a good look at the creature.
It was a disgusting grub that was several times the size of Zek. What he thought had been spines on it have back turned out to be bloody double-ended spears impaling the creature’s body. The blood dripped from it onto the ground leaving a bloody trail. It should have been dead with those wounds, but it wasn’t it’s circular mouth hungered for Zek’s flesh.
The slug was almost on top of Zek now. Zek kicked around randomly in attempt to get away, but it didn’t get him anywhere. It’s hungry jaws opened to engulf Zek. After all he’d been through he was going to get eaten by a slug.
Suddenly a beam of rainbows burst though the fog and surrounded the slug in a whirlwind. When the beam dissipated the slug had been turned to stone. Zek stared at the now stone grub. He looked up for the source of rainbow. Walking out of the fog was an alicorn. Zek’s mouth dropped. Was it one of the princesses? No it couldn’t be, this alicorn was black and white. White on the right side with the Yin cutie mark. Black on the left side with Yang cutie mark. Her mane was flowing light and darkness as if it was blowing in the wind.
“I-identify yourself.” Said Zek.
The alicorn ignored him and levitated him with her horn. She carried him through the fog walking at a slow and steady pace. They walked passed a sign that said Welcome to Silent Hill and kept walking until they reached a rest room. She opened the door and walked in. She dropped Zek in the bathroom.
“Identify your self!” demanded Zek in his best dalek voice.
The Alicorn was silent as if she hadn’t heard him. She just stared at him. The eye on the white side of her body was black and the eye on the black side of her body was white.
“Identify.” Pleaded Zek.
She continued to stare at him.
“Please.” Zek asked nicely.
Stare…
***
“Lez?” Said a soothing creepy voice. “Time to wake up sleepy head. Or did you forget we made you immortal already?” Lez’s eye light lit up. He saw the Observer leaning over him.
“That’s a good dalek, now go lead your army to victory. Make our keeper proud.”
“I obey my keeper.” Said the immortal Lez.