//------------------------------// // Spirit of Loyalty by milesprower06: Final Chapter // Story: Letters From Across The Disgruntled Multiverse // by MixMassBasher //------------------------------// Letters From Across The Disgruntled Multiverse by MixMassBasher Spirit of Loyalty: Chapter 4: Friend Intervention OR (Painful Damnation) Dear Princess Celestia, We finally found her and we rendezvoused outside her cloud house. Unfortunately, her door was locked. I tried to get a successful force lock using some bobby pins, but failed. I would try again but I had an infiltrator perk. I would have given up then and there if it weren't for the fact that her house walls were made of fucking fluffy clouds. Seriously, pegasus security stinks. Breaking and entering, you wouldn't believe what I found. Rainbow Dash, the mare that acts all tough and claims crying is totally uncool, tearing up like a big baby. I couldn't believe my eyes, but, lo and behold, here she is, a weeping wreck. Crying about how she'll never be as legendary as her ancestor, Orion, whoever that deadbeat is. So, I did the only appropriate thing to do. I said how much of a pussy she was right now. Even more so than our resident doormat. But, of course, my comment was met with more whining from her. She could at least give me a thank you card for telling her the truth. The rest of my friends, however, seemed to disagree as they started beating the living crap out of me when I laughed at Rainbow's despair. Thus, my day ended with me having a couple of fractures, a few broken ribs and two swollen black eyes. Ouch. Your injured ex-student, Twilight Sparkle At Ponyville Hospital... "Ohhhh..." Twilight moaned as she lay in a large body cast on the hospital bed. It was then that Nurse Redheart came in, clipboard in hoof. "You want to know how I got these scars?" Twilight asked with a moan. "Your friends?" Nurse Redheart suggested. "My fucking friends," Twilight repeated back. "Mm-hmm," Nurse Redheart hummed. "Oh, your medical bill just arrived. That'll be two thousand bits," Nurse Redheart added on. "Oh, fuck me where the sun don't shine!" Twilight cursed. Dear Rainbow, Sorry you didn't get into the Wonderbolts. If it makes you feel any better... I will always be there beside you, through the lonely nights that fall. Your friend, Fluttershy Dear Rainbow Dash, Despite such talent, they rejected you? How unfortunate. I've seen plenty of these situations before. From students not getting enough appreciation from their mentors, to ponies dropping out from magical school because they weren't good enough. The pain of the past haunts them so much. That's why it's better for all things to be equal. Come by my village and I will show you da wae. Your friend, Starlight Glimmer Dear Rainbow Dash, Interested in joining us? Leader of The Washouts, Lightning Dust Dear Me of This Universe, Don't listen to those mares. Listen to me. Trust me, from one awesome pony to another, the Wonderbolts are overrated. Why? Well let me tell you... Firstly, they failed to stop a Spikezilla. (don't give Spike any birthday presents. EVER.) Secondly, they allowed a reckless pony to nearly cause harm to our friends (except Twilight, of course) during the wonderbolts academy. Thirdly, their examinations only had one pony glance at the sheet and graded it straight away. (Plus, that was four generations of shit to study!) Fourth, they couldn’t stop a falling iceberg when they are fucking pegasi and needed a baby dragon to stop it. Fifth, and finally, our long time wonderbolt legends are complete dicks from framing others for crimes or just flatout name calling and the list goes on. Just quit. Don't join. The Wonderbolts are shit. Goodbye and good riddance. My advice? Set up your own academy. Your fellow awesome pony, Rainbow Dash of the Prime Disgruntledverse Dash Academy: School of Awesomeness Looking for a chance to be more awesome? Well, look no further than Dash Academy! A school for aspiring flyers. Situated at the cloud house right next to Ponyville. The head instructor being the only pony to do a sonic rainboom, winner of best young flyer competition, and the Element of fucking Loyalty. I'll make you all twenty percent cooler by the time I'm done with you. Join Now!