//------------------------------//
// Chapter 13 - Human Again 
// Story: Magic on Sweet Apple Acres 
// by Blade Star 
//------------------------------//

Well, I was going to spend the rest of the afternoon helping Apple Bloom with her homework. I’d had a busy enough day and was looking forward to relaxing and spending the evening at home with AJ. Now though, I found myself launched into a world of issues. 

Due to a touch of overconfidence on my part, I had found myself completely contaminated by Poison Joke. I had to walk at least twenty yards just to get out of them, so I was entirely certain that I was contaminated. That meant by tomorrow morning, those annoyingly happy looking flowers would have done their work and somehow changed me. 

What that something was, I had no idea. I’m not much of a botanist, nor do I claim to know too much about Poison Joke. It’s effects were seemingly random, and virtually impossible to predict. Twilight had had her horn get covered in polkadots and turn floppy in a joke I’m amazed got by Hasbro execs, Rainbow had had her wings inverted, Pinkie’s tongue had swelled up, Applejack had shrunken, Fluttershy’s voice had dropped to a baritone and Rarity’s mane had gone absolutely haywire. None of the effects were harmful or caused pain; they were more an annoyance than anything else, but I was still concerned. 

It could all be undone easily enough of course. It would just be a simple case of visiting Zecora and having her make up the necessary potion for me to soak in. That would cure the effects in an instant. Tomorrow morning though probably wouldn’t be too much fun.

You see, one thing I like to have, is a plan. My life revolves around knowing what I’m going to do and when. Like Twilight, I thrive on a schedule. Uncertainty is by far my worst enemy. And that was what I was facing now. I was actually quite scared. In a way I guess it’s funny. I’ve faced down a vile changeling queen, fought my own inner demons, and even took a pot shot at a magic stealing centaur. But in all of those cases, I had at least a rough idea of what I was doing. Now though, that was going to be turned on its head. 

Walking out of the patch of light blue plants, I began to head for the edge of the forest. From there, I could work out where I’d stupidly portalled myself and find my way back to the farm. From there, I could tell AJ what had happened, and together we could work out a way to get me to Zecora’s if I couldn’t get there under my own steam. 

See, a plan. I was much calmer now. In fact, my fear was being countered by curiosity. What would the Poison Joke do to me? While, as I said, there’s no way to predict it, from the Mane Six’ case, you could see some patterns. My main concern was that it would do something to my magic or, Celestia forbid, my gender. 

Still, as inconvenient as this all was, it was perfectly fixable; just a bump in the road. 

That bump however, decided that it wanted to become a giant pothole.

As I continued to trek through the forest, I started chatting to myself, a habit I’ve been trying to break for years. Whenever I’m on my own, I tend to natter to myself. So far, myself hasn’t said anything back, so I figure I’m okay.  

“Alright,” I was saying to myself. “Just get back to the farm and go see Zecora in the mornin’. She’ll be able to undo whatever the hay happens to ya.”

“That’s rather optimistic, don’t you think?” a voice replied. 

I started and looked around in fright. For a moment I feared my sanity finally had snapped and I’d developed an alternate personality. Well, that or that personality spell had somehow activated. I wonder if he listens when I talk to myself? 

Looking around, there was nopony in sight, at least not at first. A moment later though, there was a bright flash of white light, and a whole other problem rose up as Discord appeared before me. 

It never rains, but it pours. I resisted the urge to slam my head against my hoof. The spirit of chaos stopped hovering in the air after a moment and walked over to me. 

“Bones, my dear boy!” he exclaimed, grabbing me up in a hug. “How wonderful to see you again!” I was in no mood

“Discord! Let me go dagnabbit!” I exclaimed, struggling vainly in his grip. Luckily, after a few moments enjoying me struggling, the draconequus obliged.  

“What the hay are you doin’ out here anyway?” I asked, dusting myself off and readjusting my hat. 

“Why I love frolicking in the woods,” Discord replied, briefly taking on a deeply unsettling flower costume, throwing pink petals all around. “And I positively adore these marvelous little things.” He poked and prodded at one of the blue flowers that was presently the subject of my ire. 

“Ah s’pose you had somethin’ to do with my portal materialisin’ me all the way out here then?” I asked. Discord looked perplexed.

“Portal?” he parroted. “Really, Bones, you shouldn’t use those things. Portals are only used by asinine racist morons like...oh, wait, you’re not supposed to know about him yet.” He paused as he tried to get back on his train of thought. “In any case, I didn't do anything to mess with your magic. Honestly, Blade Star, I’d have thought by now that Princess Dark and Edgy would have made her point by now. The universe does not revolve around you!”

I snarled at that particular name he chose to refer to Luna by. Discord of course, didn’t care. He did however, notice my current predicament. 

“Well, it looks like you’re in a spot of bother, my friend,” he said. “You’ve gotten yourself absolutely covered in Poison Joke by the looks of things.” An idea occurred to me. As much of an ass Discord is to me, and I to him in return, he did have powerful chaos magic to hoof. Perhaps it would be able to undo the effects before they began? I put the request to him, with a suitable reward of course; a barrel of high quality Sweet Apple cider.

“So,” Discord said, after thinking it over for a moment, putting his lion paw and eagle talon together as he did so. “You want me to undo the effects of Poison Joke, before they actually do anything to you, after you spurned my friendly hug and were oh so rude to me as well.”

Oh merde. 

“Plus, as the undisputed master of chaos, I can hardly go around creating order, now can I?”

“Please, Discord,” I...well...begged. But he was having none of it. 

“No, my dear boy. You made the bed, now you must lie in it. Besides, it’s like Princess Moonbutt says….” Snapping his talons, he turned himself into a very crude version of Princess Luna, complete with stick on horn, wings and wig. A strong wind suddenly whipped up and he began to float off into the sky. 

“Face your fears!” 

And with that, he popped out of existence. 

Well, I dug myself into that hole, didn’t I?





So, I’d pretty much dumped fuel on the fire there. Since his reformation, Discord seems to have fallen into the habit of trying to teach ponies lessons, in his own twisted way. Well, that and flying off the handle when his feelings get hurt. Hopefully I was going to be subjected to the former, rather than the latter. 

I walked back to the farm, mentally kicking myself all the way. Don’t get me wrong, Discord is, and always will be, a supreme jackass. But he wasn’t being one at that particular moment. And when you look at the situation, I was the one who just turned around and snapped at him. Heck, I accused him of landing me in this mess with absolutely no proof whatsoever. When this was all over, I decided, I needed to apologise to him. If there’s one thing I didn’t want, it was a ticked off spirit of chaos tormenting me until I learned my lesson. 

Putting that issue to one side for a moment, my thoughts turned back to my impending predicament. At least it was winter now, and there wasn’t as much work to be done. I could afford to be out for a day while I went to Zecora’s. 

Again though, the slight fear of what this might do to me reared its head. Like I said before, I don’t like being out of control. That’s when my temper has a remarkable tendency to snap. I tried to talk myself down. Whatever happened wouldn’t be that bad. At worst it would be inconvenient. 

By the time I’d made it back to the farmhouse, I was somewhat calmer than I had been. I’d worked out a rough plan of action. All I had to do now was explain things to AJ and the others, and then possibly endure a few jokes at my expense. 

Pushing open the back door, I found all of the Apple family in the kitchen, tucking into dinner. Was it that late? I guess the walk back had taken longer than I realised. Apple Bloom got up and bounded over to me as I walked in.

“Hey there, Bones,” she said happily. 

I realised that, having come into contact with Poison Joke, I might still have some remnant of it on me. I didn’t want Apple Bloom or any of the others catching this thing as well, so I stopped the filly before she reached me. Taking hold of her with my magic, I set her down on the floor and explained myself. 

“Just hold on there a minute, AB,” I said to the little filly, before addressing the rest of the family. “Best not come near me for a while. Ah wandered through some of that Poison Joke stuff on the way back from Twilight’s.”

“What?!” Apple Bloom exclaimed. Applejack and Big Mac looked up too. “How?”

“Ah was tryin’ this new portal spell. Kinda like a teleportation, but simpler. Anyway, instead of sending me here, I ended up in the Everfree Forest, right in the middle of those dang flowers. Ah’m gonna head to Zecora’s first thing in the mornin’.”

“Well, there a right sour apple,” Applejack commented. “Any idea what that stuff’ll do to ya, sugarcube?” I shook my head.

“Your guess is as good as mine, AJ,” I replied. “Still, won’t be too bad, right?” AJ frowned. 

“Speak for yourself, Bones,” she replied. “That there plant left me as small as an apple all day. Shoot, what if ya can’t get to Zecora’s on your own?” I shrugged.

“Well, one of you guys could help me get there, right?” Big Mac shook his head as he piped up. 

“Don’t ya remember, Bones,” he said. “Applejack’s got to make the delivery to the Bayou country, Apple Bloom’s at school all day, and Ah’ve got to run the market stall.”

We all looked at each other, each hoping the other had an idea. Just then, there was a flash of white light behind me. 

“Perhaps I could be of some help?” Discord said as he stood behind me.

“Discord, what the hay are y’all doin’ here?” Applejack demanded. Snapping his talons, Discord teleported away, appearing next to Big Mac a moment later in his Ogres and Oubliettes costume.

“Why it’s guys night, of course,” he replied jovially. “I’m here to pick up Big Mac. Spike’s waiting for us back at the castle.” Big Mac grinned and quickly grabbed his stuff to head out. Discord turned back to me. 

“I should be free tomorrow though, Bones,” he went on. “If you do need somepony to help you to Zecora’s, I’d be more than willing to lend a paw.”

Ah, here was my chance to try and make amends for earlier!

“Thank you, Discord,” I said, smiling up at him. “Ah appreciate the help.” Discord smiled. 

“My, we’ve changed tone, haven’t we?” he said to me with a devilish grin. “Come tomorrow that won’t be the only thing about you that’s changed. I’ll pick you up at ten am sharp.”

Snapping his talons, the draconequus and Big Mac both disappeared in a teleport. I knew from experience that they wouldn’t be back until quite late. Heck sometimes their games ran so long that instead of getting back late at night, Mac came home early the next morning. 

That just left me with Applejack and Apple Bloom. Granny Smith was contentedly napping in her rocking chair, with Winona sitting curled up on her lap. 

“Well, at least that’s one thing sorted. Are you gonna be okay headin’ out to the Bayou country, Applejack?” AJ nodded. 

“Course, sugarcube,” she replied confidently, “Ah’ve got everything Ah need to get past that chimera if it shows its face again.” I smiled.

“Ah don’t s’pose y’all have any advice for me on dealin’ with Poison Joke, do ya?” I asked. 

“Don’t you worry none, Bones,” Applejack replied. “We’ll all be here in the mornin’ to help ya if ya need it. And Discord can help ya get to Zecora’s.” 

“Ya seem awful trustin of that slippery serpent all of a sudden AJ,” I replied, sounding a little curious. AJ waved a hoof. 

“Oh he’s not so bad really. Well, not as bad as he used to be at any rate.”

“Yeah, Mac says he's real nice sometimes,” Apple Bloom added. I pondered that. 

“Just try not to think ‘bout it, Bones,” Applejack advised. “It’ll only put you on edge, and Celestia knows how you are when you’re on edge.” 

“Hey!” I snapped, half serious. “Ah ain’t that bad.” Applejack's eyebrow went up.

“Last month when you thought the cider press was busted, you started frettin ‘bout us bein’ financially destitute before ya even checked to see if Mac could fix it,” she replied in a deadpan tone. She did make a bit of a point. 

“True,” I replied, smiling at her. The three of us burst into giggles. 





I spent the evening with AJ, helping Apple Bloom with her homework. It was a nice chance for the three of us to bond, although neither AJ or me took well to the ‘new’ maths that Cheerilee and my mum were supposedly teaching. That led to Applejack declaring that they were using their ‘fancy mathematics to muddy the issue’, while I ended up asking myself, and possibly the Equestria Education Association, why anyone would suddenly change maths. It certainly reminded me of my own poor performance in that subject back in high school. 

Eventually though, between the three of us, we managed to get through the worksheet Apple Bloom had been given. It was getting pretty late, and Luna’s moon was high in the sky by the time all three of us headed off to bed. 

Since Mac was away for the evening, I considered asking AJ if she wanted to sleep together again. But given that I was still potentially contaminated, and the fact that Mac might return before we got up tomorrow, I decided not to chance it. Although I did think it was high time me and Mac had a frank talk; stallion to stallion, about sleeping arrangements. 

I went to bed that night only slightly restless. I actually felt like a kid on Christmas Eve. I was now more curious than anything to see what the Poison Joke might do to me. 

Looking back, it should have been blatantly obvious, given the pattern of effects it had on Twilight and the others. But, as they say, hindsight is twenty-twenty. And at least it wouldn’t end up being too painful, not once I had some clothes at any rate.





I came to groggily, my vision was blurry as I rubbed my eyes. Squinting for a moment, I found that my eyesight wasn’t that great, as if there was a blur filter over them or something. I was cold too, my hooves were freezing, sticking out as they were from under the covers. I only found warmth again when I tucked myself into the foetal position. 

Well, I guess it was time to see just what the Poison Joke had done to me overnight. Rolling onto my front, I threw the covers off and got to my hooves. 

Only to damn near throw my back out. 

I cried out in pain. It felt like I was stooping or something just trying to stand normally. In the end, I settled on a sort of arched back configuration. My eyesight still wasn’t brilliant either. I could see well enough, but I couldn’t make out details, like the numbers on the face of my alarm clock. 

Out of habit, I activated my magic and set about making the bed.

Only nothing happened. 

I tried twice more, but I couldn’t get my magic to work, not for levitation, not illumination, I couldn’t even get my magic to activate at all. Reaching up with a hoof, I made to examine my horn. Perhaps I’d had something similar to Twilight? To my amazement though, I couldn’t find my horn at all. That was when I started to panic. A unicorn after all is lost without his magic. 

While my eyesight might have become a little poorer, it did revel one crucial development. 

My hooves were gone, replaced by hands. Rushing over to my desk, and struggling to walk, never mind run on only two legs once again, I took a look at my reflection as best I could. 

There was no doubt about it, I was human alright. I was the me that I’d been before all of this happened, the me before I arrived in Equestria. That explained the poor vision, back on Earth, I’d had 30/6 vision, I was longsighted. I’d needed glasses to see clearly anything up close. I’d not worn them since becoming a unicorn, and they hadn’t come with me when we ended up here. 

The end result was that I was now blind as a bat when it came to reading anything, and I would need to temporarily get used to walking on two legs again. Oh, and there was one other issue which I quickly realised, luckily before I went out of my room. 

I was completely naked. Ponies don’t wear clothes, so I’d naturally transformed without anything on. I quickly wrapped myself up in my duvet, blushing hard. 

I sat down on the edge of my bed, breathing hard. I did my best to calm down.

“It’s okay. It’s okay,” I kept repeating to myself in a desperate mantra. “Zecora can fix this in a jiffy. And you’ll be back to your old self again in no time.”

I had absolutely no desire to return to being a human. I’d been a pony for a few years now. I’d gotten used to it, and even started a relationship. And despite what Lyra might say, screw hands, I’ll take magic any day of the week. Lizzie had voluntarily stuck with her own transformation into a pegasus for the same reasons. Living in Equestria was far easier if you were a pony. Don’t get me wrong, you could as a human, but I doubt Mum and Dad would have been happy if they didn’t have each other to rely on. 

Well, there was only one thing for it. I needed to head downstairs, get breakfast, get some actual clothes, and then get to Zecora’s as fast as possible. Then I could study this whole ridiculous mess.  





Getting downstairs was a bit tricky. Between only being partly able to see where I was going, the difficulty of navigating stairs on two legs and a critical need to preserve my modesty, it wasn’t exactly a fun experience. It would probably be even more interesting when I found the rest of the Apple family. 

I managed to make it downstairs without too much trouble. Walking, as it turns out, is a bit like riding a bike, you don’t really ever truly forget. I was still a bit unsteady on my feet, but I was no longer worried about falling flat on my face. Walking through the hallway, mainly from memory due to my now poor vision, I soon found myself in the kitchen. I picked out an orange blob, a red one, a green one and a smaller yellow one. I couldn’t tell what their expressions were at this distance, but the fact that their morning chatter had gone silent gave me a clue. 

“Everypony just stay calm,” I implored, holding up a hand. “It’s me; Bones.” Applejack got up and walked over to me. She was much shorter than me now. As a human I was around 5’8; not especially tall, but far above the pony average of 4’6. 

“Bones?” she said, quietly, evidently not quite believing her eyes. “What the hay happened.”

“Poison joke happened, AJ,” I replied. “The damn thing turned me back into a human! Ah can’t see nothin’ either without my old glasses.”

Unlike my parents or Lizzie, since I’d been a pony from minute one, I didn’t have any of my old stuff with me, so I had no clothes to change into, never mind glasses to see with. 

Applejack examined me closely, trying to see if there was any way to undo this ridiculous magic. But I knew that the only way to turn back was to get in a special run bath with the antidote in it. 

“Hayseed, Bones,” AJ exclaimed. “This is about as bad as when Ah got stung by that no good flower. We gotta get ya to Zecora’s. The Bayou country can wait, Ah’m not letting ya out in the Everfree Forest like this.”

She had a good point, visually impaired as I was, I may well not see potential predators in the dark woods, since they so often blended in to the surrounding trees and scrub, never mind the fact that many, like timberwolves, stalked their prey silently. And that was assuming I didn’t come off the path and get totally lost. 

I managed to sit down at the table and got some breakfast into me. As strange as all this was, I still managed to have a conversation with Apple Bloom, who was mainly curious about what had happened and what it felt like. The brief glimmer of normalcy helped me keep my head on straight. 

“Applejack, ya don’t need to blow off work for me,” I said as we ate. “Discord should be able to help me get there easily enough. And once Zecora has me fixed up, Ah can easily find my way back on my own.” Applejack though, was in one of her stubborn moods and shook her head.

“No way, Bones,” she said firmly. “The last thing Ah’m gonna do is leave ya when you’re stuck like this. Ah’m sure Discord will help out, but Ah also know that the varmint loves to play tricks when he thinks he can get away with it. So Ah’ll come with ya to make sure that doesn’t happen. C’mon, let’s not hang around. We’re gettin ya to Zecora’s pronto!”

And so, being led by AJ, and still wrapped up in bedsheets I might add, I set out for the Everfree Forest.





 It wasn’t a particularly easy trip to make for the two of us. I could tell what was land and what was sky, I could distinguish trees and such, but things like uneven ground were invisible to me until I found myself tripping over my feet. It made for slow going through the orchards. It wasn’t particularly comfortable either. I hadn’t got any shoes or socks to wear either, and while the grass wasn’t too bad, I knew it was going to be damned painful walking through the Everfree. 

I was also a bit annoyed, as was AJ, by the fact that we were short one member of our party. Our original plan had been for AJ to go about her day, while Discord went with me to Zecora’s. But given the nature of my change, AJ had blown off her plans. But Discord hadn’t shown his face yet. 

“Where in the wide, wide realm of Equestria is that glorified jackalope?” Applejack exclaimed as she led me through the orchard towards the Everfree Forest. “If a feller offers to lend a hoof, the least he can do is actually show up.”

Just then, I heard the easily recognisable pop of a teleport spell.

“Right behind you,” he said, in an affected Prench accent. AJ and me both jumped in fright. 

Turning around, I got a better look, or as best as I could, at Discord. As with everything, he now seemed smaller. The draconequus still had a few inches on me, but looked nowhere near as intimidating as he could as a pony. He examined me closely. 

“Oooohhh dear,” he said, with an obvious grin. “That Poison Joke really did a number on you didn’t it, Bones.” 

“Nice of ya to show up, Discord,” Applejack replied coldly. Discord huffed.

“It’s not my fault you two set off early. I was at the farmhouse at ten, just as I promised.” To emphasise the point, we heard the clock chime the hour in Ponyville. 

“Well, you’re here now. That’s all that matters,” I said, trying to smooth things over. “I don’t suppose you could lend a hoof and help me see and walk a bit easier.” Discord thought for a moment before snapping his talons. 

“Well, since you asked nicely,” he replied. 

A moment later, I found myself able to see again, as a pair of glasses had materialised on my face. I also had some basic clothes and shoes. It was certainly better than walking around half-blind and clad in only bedsheets. I blinked a few times and adjusted things until they were comfortable. 

“Thanks, Discord,” I said after a moment. The draconequus smiled. 

“Oh think nothing of it, dear boy,” he replied, waving a paw. “Now, let’s get you to Zecora’s.”

A snap of his talons later, and we found ourselves standing outside the shaman's hut, albeit feeling a tad queasy from the teleport. I don’t know what it is, but Discord’s teleports always seem to make ponies lose their lunch. 

Thank Celestia I’d only had a quick breakfast. 





The three of us soon found ourselves inside Zecora’s hut, and, after a brief shock at seeing me (after all, I looked nothing like my normal self), she quickly set about brewing up the necessary potions to undo the effects of the Poison Joke. Applejack volunteered to lend a hoof. As an Earth Pony, she was quite skilled when it came to horticulture, and partly due to her little sister’s interest in the subject, knows a fair bit about chemistry too. She actually stopped by Zecora’s shop in town not too long ago to pick up some herbal medicine for Granny Smith. 

While the two of them worked to create the antidote solution, Discord and I had some time to talk. I’ve always known Discord to be devious, secretive, manipulative and on occasion downright cruel. But that’s changed as of late. His recent services to the country notwithstanding, he’s become a lot nicer, for the most part. He’s developed a friendship with Spike and Big Mac, as well as my dad, he’s a lot more sociable and friendly. Heck, the fact that he’d volunteered to teleport me here to save me a trip spoke for itself. He really had changed. 

Of course, he’s still Discord, that’ll never change. He does still love to mess with ponies and play long con, convoluted pranks, and when his feelings are hurt, he does sometimes act out and slip back into his old ways. But he feels like a friend now. A crazy, not entirely trustable friend who might one day decided to steal your organs and sell them to Armenian gangsters, but a friend nonetheless. He’d certainly changed a lot from his early days of reformation, before Tirek’s brief escape. 

So, you can understand why I wanted to apologise to him. The past few times I’d run into him, I’d treated him as that same untrustworthy, misanthropic, near homicidal maniac who only occasionally responded to Fluttershy’s admonishments. Now though, he genuinely was trying to be a friend. And who wouldn’t want a near-god of chaos as a friend? 

The two of us were sitting in Zecora’s hut, sipping on a hot cup of tea each. The zebra grows her own blend right here in the Everfree. At present, I was sipping on a close approximation of berber whiskey; black tea with mint leaves, drunk by Moroccan bedouins for centuries, while Discord was enjoying the glass itself in his usual chaotic way. Setting my cup down on the table, I turned to the draconequus. 

“Discord,” I said quietly, catching his attention.

“Hmm?” he replied, turning to look at me. I tried to think of the best way to put things. 

“I just wanted to say...thanks for doing this. Ya made today a whole lot easier for me and AJ. And Ah’m sorry for how Ah treated you before. Ah didn’t mean to hurt your feelings or nothin’. Ah’d just gotten so used to y’all being the Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony, that Ah never thought about the idea of you bein’ a friend.” 

Discord listened with an air of fatherly patience. And after a moment, his previous contemplative expression brightened, and with no small amount of happiness declared;

“That’s all I needed to hear.” 

Snapping his talons, the world went white for a moment as I was again caught in a teleportation. This time though, I didn’t feel my stomach do somersaults. As my vision cleared, I was surprised to find myself back in Twilight’s castle, in the library in fact, where I’d been when this whole mess started. 

The first thing I noticed was that I was no longer human. I was back to my usual equine self, complete with horn and the reassuring feel of my own magic. In front of me stood a shocked looking Twilight, and a slightly irate version of my dad. Discord was standing next to me, as he had been a moment ago. 

“I win,” the draconequus said to my old man. “You owe me fifty bits.”

“Fine,” Dad said with no small amount of annoyance. I looked around, trying to work out what had just happened. 

“Hang on just an apple pickin’ minute,” I said in a perplexed tone. “How the hay did Ah get here? And how come Ah’m a pony again.” Twilight sheepishly explained. 

“You...never were a human, Blade Star,” she explained. “When you activated your portal spell, Discord hijacked it and used it to pull you into one of his pocket dimensions. Everything after you left the library was an illusion. You never fell into Poison Joke, and you were never turned into a human. You’ve actually only been gone ten minutes.

“Your dad had told Discord that if he wanted more friends he needed to be more likeable and friendly, and stop messing with ponies for the fun of it.” She cast a withering leer at Discord at that part. “Discord said he could make friends without changing himself so much, and bet your dad fifty bits that he become friends with you. Then he came here just as we were leaving and took over your portal spell.”

I turned to the still grinning Discord. To say I was furious was an understatement. The crazy lunatic had kidnapped me, stuck me in a pocket dimension, and changed my species, just to win a bet with my dad. And to think that I was coming round to the idea that he had changed. 

I was about to tear his head off, both verbally and possibly physically, but a thought occurred to me. Discord was a jackass, there was no denying that. But was I really any better than him? Whenever he stopped by, I was either immediately hostile or aloof towards him. How was that supposed to encourage him to change? 

I think I’ve said it before, but Discord, despite his years, is still quite new to the idea of friendship, and when his feelings get hurt, rather than deal with the problem like a normal four thousand year old chaos entity, he acts out and play tricks. He did it with Fluttershy’s friend Treehugger. And, illusion aside, he had actually helped me out out of the kindness of his heart, wherever the heck that might be found. 

So, my initial anger evaporated. And it was replaced by a small feeling of pity for Discord. He just wanted friends, in his own weird way. And had what I just experienced been real, I would have considered him a friend. Why should it be any different because it was an illusion? I looked up at him and smiled. 

“It’s okay, Discord,” I said simply and held out my hoof for him to bump. Twilight looked genuinely surprised as Discord returned the gesture.

“You’re a bigger man than I, Bones,” Dad said with a smile. “Though I’m not sure it’s a good idea to vindicate this little experiment.”  I turned back to the draconequus.

“One of the most important parts in bein’ a friend, is forgivin’ them when they make a mistake,” I replied sagely, channelling my inner Twilight. “And he was right about one thing, Ah have been harsh on him these past few months. It’s time Ah gave him a chance.”

Discord smiled at me, genuinely for once. For all his bluster, he does want friends. Only sometimes his nature makes it a bit harder for him to find them. And you can’t tell me he isn’t a good friend when the chips are down. After all, he went tearing up to the Changeling Kingdom to rescue Fluttershy and the others not so long ago. 

And that is how I became friends with Discord. He’s even invited me to join him on this week’s Guys Night. Now if only I knew a damn thing about how you play O&O.