//------------------------------// // I'm Sneaky // Story: Storming Out // by Mocha Star //------------------------------// Twilight burst into laughter while still inside the casket, helping to muffle the noise she was making. She bit onto her hoof and rolled to her side for a few seconds until she calmed down. “I can’t believe that worked,” she giggled to herself, “I’m a natural Nightshade,” she moved to brush her mane back and bumped the glass. “Oh yeah,” she teleported beside the coffin and cleared her throat. “Well, great, now I have to find a way off this ship,” she tapped a hoof on the floor, “without being caught. What else can go wrong today?” Her stomach grumbled and her shoulders relaxed, letting her sag as she looked at the hole in the ceiling with a soft groan. “Of course, why not just make me hungry during my escape from the clutches of evil.” She moved to the primary door and placed her ear against it, the sound of shuffling and noises filled her ears and she quickly turned to look around the room. “Ah-ha, the classic vent escape!” She climbed onto the coffin and used her wings for balance while removing the vent with her magic. She hooked her hooves on the rim and managed a pull up, grinning as she pulled herself in and gagged. She reacted by pulling her legs to her body and she fell from the air shaft with a trail of old dust, lint, and cloth raining over her.  She scrambled under the table the coffin was on and coughed quietly to clear her mouth. Her nose started to dribble from the particulates in them now but she ignored it while crawling through the rest of the way. She cast an easy spell and cleaned the mess including whatever was inside her nose, returning it all to the vent; then she resealed it and gave it a frown. “That never happens in books or stories, why don’t they make that more realistic so ponies don’t do that?” she whined while looking around the room. “Oh, duh,” she rolled her eyes at herself and smirked. “Nicely done, Sherlock Mane. Ignore the maintenance shaft against the wall hidden behind the bed,” she moved the bed slightly and grinned when the portal revealed itself. A simple square of metal bolted to the wall, certain to be cleaner than the vent, and when it opened it gave her access to space and areas she couldn’t reach easily or normally. She looked inside with her horn alight and stepped in, pulling her wings tight to her sides. It was tight, but she could move through the walls now, and her first goal was to find a snack. She moved ahead and every few paces stopped and listened to a wall, many times there was nothing, others there was quiet conversation. She reached a cross-section that was wide enough for her to turn around if she moved back and forth between the shaft. Her mouth watered when she sniffed a fruit salad and followed her nose down the path to a hole at her eye height. She looked in, but only saw an empty bed. “Why would anypony want to see somepony sleep?” she resumed her search and came to another peephole. “A shower? This one’s a white room with a black couch… what kind of weird ponies are on this ship?” she chose to stop looking through random peepholes, instead sniffing her way to her prize. She bumped against a pipe that resonated a short deep tone through the hall, stopping her immediately and her ears perked. “Hey, Chef, did you just say something?” A muffled mare's voice asked. “No, why?” another mare responded. “Thought you grunted in disapproval…” “Sous, why would I do that? You’re my bestie and keeps me from being testy.” The two giggled and talked for a short while, finally taking their leave to use the couch. “Finally, I thought they’d never leave,” Twilight grumbled and peeked through the peephole to get a lay of the area. She began to cast a teleport but stopped before she cast it. She looked down at her knees and found the hatch a few paces ahead. In a minute she was inside the kitchen and the whole room was hers. She sat on her haunches and clapped her hooves in glee, then she hopped to her hooves and used her magic to open the refrigerator. A cooked dead bird was the first thing she saw and she blinked at it. “Well, somepony’s had a worse day than me,” she snickered and reached over it with her forelegs to a large box. “They’re not gonna need this,” she pulled it down and set it on the floor. The box, once opened, held the oddest fruit she’d ever seen. She sniffed it and it was sweet, a slight tang told her it was tart, and the outside was as hard as a hoof wall. She bit into it and her mind was flooded with giggles and happiness; for a few manic seconds, she knew what it was to be Pinkie Pie, then she sneezed. And sneezed. And sneezed. She spat the fruit out and pushed it away, noticing something shift at the bottom of the box. She held her nose with her fetlock and lifted a note, Hey, Jerry, you know how you don’t like spicy food? Gotcha! Don’t use my toenail clippers without filling out the correct toenail requisition form next time. -Tom. She lit her horn and cast an anti-sneeze spell that most ponies around Ponyville knew since Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy began pranking together. Her chest tightened as she thought of her friends and how she’d sent them away, shouted at Pinkie and said hurtful things she couldn’t take back. They’d left her, maybe they didn’t need her anymore. She could just turn herself in, maybe talk her way into Tempest’s, or even the Storm King’s, good graces and convince them to turn against their evil ways and embrace harmony and friendship. She snerked at the absurdity of it all. My friends are probably fine, but regardless of anything else, I have to save the princesses and Equestria. It’s still my responsibility and I have to do this, nothing’s changed except now I have fewer friends and more sneaking to do. She stood up and resolved herself to be better and do better. She took a single step forward and onto the fruit she’d spat out, landed face first into the box, and black powder puffed all over her head. She sneezed and reared back, her eyes burning from the pepper she blinked through the pain for the sink and moved in any direction as she cast the no sneeze spell again. She banged her snout against something hard and as she cast the spell she reared up, stumbling aside and into a stack of pans that fell across the floor with a clatter that would make anyone wonder what was the matter. With a final sneeze, just as white flour fell over her, coating her from head to hoof. She stayed standing, her eyes stinging and bloodshot, and she managed to snort her nostrils free. “Gre~at, what next?” There was a pounding and scrambling against the entrance door, finally it swung open and two mares wearing chef whites and four guards fell over each other. “What’s the noise? Who’s messing up my kitch-” the mare wearing the toque screeched to a stop with everypony else and shivered, looking at Twilight in fear. “Huh?” Twilight grunted in her nasal tone that started the group of six into a scream. They all point at her, frozen in fear. “G-g-g-ghost! The princess’ ghost is going to haunt us all!” Twilight thought about what she looked like, standing tall on two legs, covered with flour, wings outstretched, probably red eyes… “O~oooo, I am going to haunt you all! And you’re never going to be rid of me, oooooo,” she whined more than moaned, but it was still effective, “the only hope you have is to read lots of books and donate to local charities… uh, boo!” The group scrambled over each other again, this time to leave while screaming. Twilight shook flour off her body and cast a minor healing spell and a grooming spell to clear herself of everything, then she barked a laugh and pointed at the door that they’d closed behind them. “Ha, don’t even try to catch me, I’m as slippery as an eel and quick as a hummingbird's wings.” She lifted her snout and harrumphed and turned to the hatch. She turned and saw a few apples and pears, so she grabbed them in her magic with a smirk until she realized what they’d do after seeing even a ghost of her. “Aw, fiddlesticks,” she said and quickly climbed back in, closing the hatch behind her. She hurried her way back the way she came, eating an apple and pear on her way. Once back in the room, she closed the hatch, checked herself over, then teleported back into the coffin and settled in. Waiting was agonizingly long and while she waited she began to think of her friends again. She hoped they were alright and that they weren’t captured as well. The clunk of the door being unlatched, which surprised her because she hadn’t heard it latch last time, announced Tempest’s arrival. “Look, you fools. She’s still as dead as a doornail,” Tempest pointed at Twilight. One of the creatures grumbled and Tempest’s horn sparked. “Kicked the bucket? Do you really think it matters? She’s still stiff as a board. Now, get out of here and make sure no one enters this room without my explicit approval. “Try to get a single bath in and then I’m the most popular pony on the ship.” The chef spoke quickly, “But, Tempest, we saw her. She was as see-through as a cloudy window and her eyes were dripping tears of blood! She howled like a dozen tortured souls, she hovered off the ground without a single flap of her wings, and she said she’d devour the souls of everyone on the ship if-” “It’s true, I saw the whole thing,” the sous chef cried out. The group nodded and Tempest’s temper was starting to wear thin. “ “Silence,” Tempest shouted and let sparks fly across the group of six, “I won’t have any more nonsense about our passenger. Leave now or I’ll start counting lashes.” The group stood tall and turned, then quickly left, followed by Tempest, who looked at the mare in the coffin for a second, then nodded and resumed her walk. She stopped suddenly and looked at the flower in Twilight’s hooves. “I swear she wasn’t holding anything a second ago,” she shrugged and left, the door clunking again.