//------------------------------//
// Chapter 10 - Nothing Exceeds Like Excess 
// Story: Off The Mark 
// by Goldfur 
//------------------------------//

I took my time with breakfast the next morning.  I planned to visit a number of ponies today before I had to head back to Canterlot, and there was no point in starting too soon while most of them would also be getting ready for the new day.  Steady Flight asked for the day off and I was happy to give it to him.  It seemed all the sweets yesterday aggravated a cavity and he knew a dentist in Canterlot that would see him on a Sunday.

After getting dressed, my first stop was at the shop of the local confectioner.  Although I had noticed that my pony body seemed to crave sugar a lot more than I did as a human, my sweet tooth was not the reason for the visit.  Bon Bon had specifically invited me to come to see her at her shop, and that suited me fine.  As was typical of the buildings in Ponyville, her premises were themed on the product that sold within, although not to the degree of Sugarcube Corner. Upon entering, my nose was assaulted by the smells of the enormous variety of sweets within.  Unlike Earth’s supermarkets, the majority of the candies didn’t have wrappers, although some were enclosed in twists of wax paper. Most were kept in jars with lids such as you would see in old-fashioned sweet shops, while chocolates were on display on trays.  The mare whom I had come to see was just putting out one of those trays when I arrived, and she gave me a welcoming smile.

“Good morning, Mark.  I trust that you slept well?”

“I had a wonderful night’s sleep, thank you.  It might have been even better if I had managed to beat Rainbow Dash at bowling last night.”  While I had lost, I had succeeded in wiping the smug grin off her face by almost making a heroic comeback in the final frame.  She may have been Equestria’s foremost flyer, but she was far from the best bowler.  Despite my lack of practice as a pony, my experience as a human had made up for it. I hadn’t bowled nearly as well as I could with fingers, but neither had I disgraced myself any further since that first ball.

“Excellent!” the earth pony said before turning toward the door at the rear of the shop.  “Lyra! Come and say good morning to Mark!”

My eyebrows raised in startlement, although I suppose I shouldn’t have been surprised.  Lyra had been introduced as Bon Bon’s ‘very good friend’, although it was plain as the extra-large nose on my face that they were a lot more than that.  The mint-green unicorn was nice enough, but she had managed to give me the creeps a couple of times when I caught her staring at me when I inadvertently had tried to do something in a human fashion.  Hey!  I’d only been a pony for less than a week!

Lyra emerged from the back with a container of boiled lollies carried in the glow of her magic.  She set them down on the counter to trot over to me with a big grin on her face.  “Hi, Mark!”

“Hello, Lyra.  I hadn’t realized that you worked here.”

“Nah, I just help Bons out in the morning before I go to my real job. Music cutie mark, remember?”

I suppose I should have recalled that after the unicorn had grilled me about my own.  These ponies seemed to put an awful lot of store in their meaning.  I didn’t want to disappoint them and say that I didn’t know, so I just let them speculate.  I didn’t tell them my guess that it was Equestria’s private joke on me, indicating that I was a bit disaster-prone.

“Can you show Mark around while I finish setting up for the morning rush, Lyra?” Bon Bon asked.

“Sure thing!  C’mon – you can see the shop front anytime.  Come out back and see where the magic happens,” Lyra said as she headed to the rear door.

“I thought all of Equestria was where magic happened,” I replied drolly.

“Oh, very funny,” she replied and stuck her tongue out at me. “Anyway, you won’t find a finer confectioner in the entire world!”

As the mare waxed lyrical (see what I did there?) on the accomplishments of her marefriend, I counted myself lucky that Bon Bon wasn’t showing me all this.  Undoubtedly, she would have gone too far into the boring intricacies of the vocation, while the unicorn just hit the highlights.  It also kept her distracted from quizzing me until the earth pony joined us and the topic turned to more general Ponyville news.  I managed to get their impressions of the reign of the current “Princess”, both boiling down to being happy with the status quo. Business was good for each of them, so no reason for discontent.  Bon Bon even let me take a spin at candy-making.  I proved adept at sugar pulling but had no artistic talent whatsoever decorating the confectioner’s namesake.  She took it in good humor and I was allowed to take my feeble attempts home with me.  I quipped that this was incentivizing me to fail and that drew a laugh from both mares. I left the shop with my saddlebag half full of a variety of sweets just as the first customers of the day arrived.

I stopped outside the shop and adjusted my saddlebags – OK, fine, I was deciding which would be the first goody sacrificed to the Maw of Mark – and couldn’t help but overhear Lyra talking to her marefriend.

“You did see that, didn’t you, Bonnie?  How he didn’t mind shaking hooves sole-to-sole?  And how he called hoofguards gloves?  I’m 95% sure that he’s actually a human in disguise.”

I panicked briefly until I heard Bon Bon’s reply.  “Just like you were 95% sure Gilda was actually a human two months ago.”

“OK, maybe I was wrong that time, but you have to admit, she was suspiciously dexterous with those claws of hers.”

“Maybe because she was born with them?  Spare me the conspiracy theories, Lyra.”

“That’s not it at all!  I’m just being logical here!”

“Ah yes, ma’am?  Have you made your selections?”

I trotted away hurriedly, not wanting to give the green mare any more ammunition for her suspicions.





My next target was the building shaped somewhat like a fairground carousel and, as I soon found out from a small but fancy sign on the door, named appropriately.  The Carousel Boutique was the home and workplace of one of Twilight’s closest friends who had insisted that I drop by.  I had exactly zero interest in female fashions, but at least it was an excuse to talk to Rarity.  I was about to knock on the door when it opened and a small unicorn filly looked up and stared at me.

“You’re Mark Wells, aren’t you?” she asked.

“Yes, I am.”

“Come on in.  Rarity’s expecting you,” she said with a giggle as she stepped aside to let me in.

“She is?  I hadn’t made an appointment,” I said as I entered the boutique.

That only made the filly grin even more.  “She’s been talking about you ever since the party yesterday.”

“They must be hard up for something new to gossip about in this small town, I suppose.”

She giggled again.  “I suppose. Gotta go!”

She dashed out the door without even introducing herself.  I shrugged and looked around for Rarity, but the showroom was empty except for some mannequins… or would that be ponyquins?

“Hello!  Anyone here?” I called out.

Moments later, I heard a familiar voice saying, “Welcome to Carousel Boutique, where every garment is chic, unique, and magnifique!  Oh!  Mark, darling – how nice to see you!”

The unicorn’s affectations were familiar to me by now, so I just gave her a smile and replied, “It’s good to see you too, Miss Rarity.”

“No need to be so formal, Mark.  I’m pleased that you came around this morning.  I have something for you.”

“You do?  I thought that you just wanted to show me around your business as part of my assignment that I mentioned yesterday.”

“Oh, we’ll get to that, but you had inspired me, and I wanted you to be the first to try out the result.”

I looked about me at the various fancy dresses.  “I really don’t think any of these suit me.”

Rarity laughed gaily.  “Not those, dear.  I do tailor work for the local stallions too.  Just wait there a moment, please.”

She disappeared into the back room from which she had emerged but quickly returned, levitating some objects which she placed on a countertop. She then unfolded one of them to reveal a stunning crimson dinner jacket, tastefully decorated with silver threadwork.  I whistled in appreciation… of the jacket, not the mare!  Not that there was anything wrong about how she looked, either. 

She gave me a smile and batted her lashes at me.

“I notice that you prefer to wear a shirt and vest all the time.”

That was true.  Despite a breezy backside, I had already gotten used to just wearing those plus a business suit top while I was in court.  I now felt ‘dressed’ and comfortable that way, even when most of the ponies around me still wore nothing.

“I like this combination.  Steady Flight chose it for me.”

“Your friend has good taste, but you need something extra to go with them when you take a marefriend out to dinner.  Try this on, please.  I believe I got your measurements right yesterday.”

Well, that explained why I had caught the unicorn eyeing me so much at the party.  Still, if she could accurately measure me by sight alone, she must be pretty good.  I allowed Rarity to put the jacket on me, and it fitted perfectly.  Yep – she’s good alright.

“And just to add that dashing touch, I have one more accessory.”

She lifted the other item on the countertop with her hooves and wrapped it around my neck, adjusting the jacket around it.  She then pointed me at a floor-length mirror and I took a look at myself.  The sable-colored ascot and jacket went together beautifully and I was very impressed.

“Wow!  That looks really snazzy!  I’m very impressed.  I’ll take it. How much does it cost?”

The elegant unicorn tittered.  “Oh no, darling!  It’s a gift. Consider it payment for the inspiration that you gave me.”

“I can’t just take it as a freebie, Rarity.  This is your livelihood, after all.”

“Well – if you feel that strongly about it, perhaps you might consider taking me out for dinner instead?  You need to break it in properly, after all.”

“That seems reasonable and I’d love to, but I have to leave on the last train to Canterlot today.”

Rarity’s face fell.  “Oh.”

“I’d still like to pay you for these.”

“No, dear, I won’t hear of it.  Perhaps I can take a rain check for the next time you visit Ponyville?”

“If that makes you happy, then fine, but I don’t know when I’ll be back.”

She gave me a strange look.  “Is there nothing you’ve seen so far that interests you enough to return?”

“I don’t know yet.  You know my circumstances, and a lot of this is very new to me still.”

Rarity closed her eyes and sighed.  Her smile returned quickly though.  “Shall I show you around the shop while you’re here?”

“That would be nice,” I replied with a smile.





I left the boutique with a better understanding of why Rarity was considered to be the Element of Generosity.  After watching her apply an anti-crease spell to the jacket, I carefully folded it and the ascot into my saddlebag.  I also had learned far too much about the fashion industry, but at least I had eventually gotten the couturier’s opinion of how Ponyville was faring under the auspices of Trixie Lulamoon.  Although Rarity’s views were colored by her friend Twilight’s interaction with the de facto ruler of Equestria, the practical business mare had to admit that overall the nation seemed to be doing well.  The Great and Egotistical Princess was going to be pleased to hear that.  After her near disaster with Flim and Flam, I think she deserved that much.





My next stop was a twofer – Sweet Apple Acres.  Although Applejack’s attitude had thawed after learning my true circumstances and my need to prevaricate, she nevertheless still didn’t like the fact that our relationship had started off with some deception on my part.  But because Twilight had wholeheartedly endorsed me (despite the kiss incident!), the farm mare had agreed to tolerate the situation, if not to actively support me. I could live with that.  However, my main reason to visit her family’s orchard was not to review how the economy was affecting her but to meet another of her friends there.

Rainbow Dash, flush from her victories, had offered to coach me, boasting that she could do better than Steady Flight.  Considering how my flying lessons had gone so far, I had accepted, much to Steady’s chagrin.  A round on me placated him, and he eventually admitted that bringing in another expert was probably a good idea.  I asked that the lessons be conducted somewhere outside of Ponyville where my clumsiness would not be observed, not to mention fewer buildings and other structures to crash into.  Rainbow had suggested Sweet Apple Acres as a good rendezvous point, and as it fitted into my plans and was easy to find, I had agreed.

So, here I was standing on a hill overlooking the orchards of apple trees that gave their property its name, a gentle breeze ruffling my feathers, nervously listening to the prismatic mare’s instructions.

“You have to flap your wings real hard,” Rainbow said emphatically.

“But… Steady reckons that my body is built for power – won’t that be too much?” I queried.

“Look – which one of us is the expert flyer here?  We’ll get you in the air first and then work off the rough edges, okay?”

“If you say so.”

“I do.  Now, hold your wings like this and start flapping!  Put your magic into it!”

I’m not sure if it was twenty-two or twenty-three apple trees that I tore through on my super-powered flight, but my first lesson was abruptly terminated by a red-painted wall.  Naturally, I had found the largest structure on the property and crashed into it.





The barn came off a lot better than I did, and as I lay groaning on the ground at the base of the building, Applejack walked up and stared dispassionately down at me, shaking her head.

“Don’t that hurt a mite?” she asked.

“No pain, no gain,” I replied.

“Who’s payin’ for the damage to my apple trees?”

“Send the bill to Trixie.”

“Ah’ll be sure to do that.”

Rainbow landed next to Applejack and the pegasus glared at me. “What the buck was that?” she demanded.

“A painful reminder that Steady may have known what he was talking about,” I replied.

The colorful mare merely rolled her eyes.  “Obviously you were doing it wrong.  Now get up and we’ll start again.”

I groaned as I pulled myself onto my hooves.  Pegasi might be light and resilient, but it nevertheless hurt to go from sixty to zero in nothing flat.  I managed to walk off the pain on the way back to the hill to re-start my lessons.  This time Rainbow aimed me in the opposite direction before beginning.

“Okay – obviously you have no problem getting into the air.  Your acceleration and speed are fine, so let’s work on control.  There are seven different techniques to initiate and sustain a turn, so I’ll go through them and the best situation to use each.”  She twisted a wing in a manner I hadn’t seen before.  “First is wing warp, which can be done clockwise or counterclockwise.  Careful not to combine this with the other techniques until you’re really confident. For example…”  She then rattled off a string of technical details involving angle of attack, feather spread, wingbeats per second, dwell, and several more that I failed to recognize. “You got all that?” she finished off.

I shook my head.  “You kinda lost me there.”

“Oh, come on!  This is basic stuff!  Now spread your primaries as I showed you and take off!”

I gulped and followed her orders.

Let the record state that I did successfully execute a turn.  I didn’t hit any trees this time.  I kind of wish I had; they would have slowed me down and the impact with the wall on the opposite side of the barn would have been so much less painful.

Applejack came over once more, shaking her head in disbelief. “Have ya heard the sayin’ – can’t hit the broad side of a barn?”

“Yeah,” I replied dazedly.

“Try it some time.”

“Wise words, Apple Smack.”

She chuckled and left me to the tender mercies of Rainbow Dash who started berating me for not listening to her instructions properly.

I interrupted her.  “This time, can we have the Flight For Dummies course instead of doctorate-level Avionics 605?  I really don’t think I need to know about advanced wing-overs and stall theory for maximum maneuverability as yet.”

“But this is the easy stuff!” she objected.

“For you, maybe.  I just want to stop meeting unmovable objects on a regular basis.”

“I’m going to get you flying properly or my name’s not Rainbow Dash! Now get up and let’s go over this again.”

This time I did not hit the barn wall.  Instead, I flew through the open doors and wreaked havoc with the contents before coming to an inevitable halt in a pile of farm implements.

It came as no big surprise to me that the orange mare was there moments later.  I got the first words in though.  “Look – I missed the broad side of the barn!” I proclaimed proudly.

She snickered before she said, “It may have been pref’rable.  You gonna pay for the damages?”

“Add it to the bill,” I said with a pained groan.

“Shur ’nuff,” she replied as she started to help extricate me from the pile of tools and barrels of feed.

“Are you trying to make me look like a fool?” demanded Rainbow who had arrived just behind Applejack.

“Now listen here, Dash,” Applejack said sternly, “Yer not teachin’ him right.  Mark’s like a foal who dunno how ta fly yet.  Ya gotta start with the basics.”

“But I did start with the basics!  You can’t get to be a Wonderbolt recruit without knowing those! Even Pound Cake can fly better than him!”

“The Cake’s colt is an exception and ya know it.  What Mark needs is someone who knows how ta take it slow ’n easy fer starters.”

“Sounds like you’re talking about Fluttershy.”

“Bingo!  Now, why dontcha take Mark over to her cottage while Ah clean up this here mess. I dun think the farm can take much more of yer flyin’ lessons.”

Grumbling loudly, the pegasus mare helped to get me untangled from the wreckage and supported me as I tried to get back onto my hooves once more. “Come on, Crash Wells.  Let’s see if Flutters has some idea how to deal with a klutz like you.”

“Sounds like a plan,” I replied as I stumbled down the path.  I had intended to pay her a visit too, so all I had to do is survive Rainbow’s help until I got there.





Fluttershy’s cottage was adorable!  It looked almost as if it had grown there rather than being built.  It certainly had a roof of living vegetation. And the lack of any square angles gave it a more organic look.  The front door had a top half and bottom half, reminding me of the doors of some stables back on Earth.  I had never actually seen them in person before, but it definitely suited the rest of the edifice.

Rainbow hovered near the top half and rapped on it, calling, “Hey, Flutters!  You home?”

After a short wait, the upper door partially opened.  “Yes, Dash?” she asked quietly.  Then she spotted me and she flung both halves of the door open fully. “Oh dear!  What happened to you, Mark?”

“A little flying accident,” Rainbow replied.  “Applejack doesn’t think Mark’s ready for my lessons yet, though he’d go from zero to awesome if he could just pick them up.  Anyway, do you want to try teaching him?”

“Come in.  I’ll get my first aid kit.  Please make yourself comfortable on the couch.  That is, if you don’t mind?”

I didn’t mind, but a certain white rabbit seemed disinclined to make room.  “Your pet bunny won’t move,” I called out, only to look back and see him frown and narrow his brows.  He did jump down from the couch, though.  Before I could move, a sharp pain shot through my right foreleg.  The rabbit was standing in front of me with his front paws on his hips, glaring at me evilly. The little bugger had kicked me! Hard!  But he was off the couch and I sprawled on it before he decided to get back on.

Fluttershy returned then, carrying a white box by its handle in her mouth.  I wondered how sanitary that was for something like a first aid kit, but this was pony-land, so what did I know?

“Angel Bunny is a little possessive sometimes,” the yellow pegasus said after she put down the first aid kit.  “He can be a bit moody when he gets all comfortable on the couch.  Oh, and Angel Bunny isn’t a pet.  He’s my friend.  All the animals here are my friends.”

“No kidding,” I replied, giving the devil-rabbit the evil eye.

Fluttershy washed off the blood and bandaged my scrapes while Rainbow Dash made her escape.  Then she left to make us some tea while I rested up.  I laid back on the couch and closed my eyes to rest a bit now that my injuries had been dealt with.  As previously, they were already healing, a testimony to the truly magical recuperation powers of pegasi.  I’d have been more grateful for that if it wasn’t for the fact that I would not have gotten those injuries in the first place if I had become a unicorn instead. Then again, I probably would have managed to stab myself with my horn in some improbable manner if I had.

“My, you have been creating some delicious chaos lately,” a cultured voice said from right above me.

I opened my eyes and freaked out.  “What the hell are you?!” I squeaked as I tried to back away from the serpentine mismatch of animal parts that loomed over me, grinning in a not entirely pleasant manner.

“Now, now!  No need for rudeness.  I’m a friend of Fluttershy’s.  I couldn’t help but notice the shenanigans that you’ve been getting up to since your arrival, and when you turned up here – well, can you blame me for wanting to get a closer look at the unintentional padawan of my favorite pastime?”

“What do you mean?” I asked suspiciously.

“Why, your propensity for causing chaos, of course?  You even have a cutie mark for it.  I’m almost envious!”

“Oh, Discord!  I didn’t know you were here,” Fluttershy said from the doorway. 

The name jogged my memory.  Twilight’s presentation described him as a ‘semi-reformed pain in the flank’ who was defeated by the Royal Sisters ages ago and then a second time by the Elements of Harmony. 

She smiled up at the creature currently sitting on her ceiling. “Would you like some tea too?  I’m making some for Mark Wells already.”

“I would love a cup, Fluttershy, dear.”  He gave the pegasus a genuine smile.

“I’ll bring everypony some scones too,” the mare said as she turned back to the kitchen.

“You know Fluttershy?” I asked incredulously.

“For a lot longer than you, human.”

I gaped.  “How did you know what I am?”

“I forgive you for not knowing, but I am a god.”

“I don’t believe in gods,” I replied, although with a lack of conviction.  “Wait! Do you know how to get me home again?”

The creature looked thoughtful.  “Maybe, but why would I want that?  Your presence in Equestria has made things much more fun.  You’ve given me so many chuckles since you arrived.  I had hoped for much more pandemonium when that stage magician got the message meant for Twilight Sparkle, but I’m pleased to say you are picking up the slack admirably.”

“How did you know about… no, don’t tell me – you’re a god, right?”

Discord grinned broadly.  “Now you’re catching on.  I like the bright ones – they’re always more fun.”

“Not sure if I like that.  You wouldn’t have anything to do with me being here in Equestria, would you?”

“Moi?  Arrange an accident with a magic portal?  Don’t credit me for your natural klutziness.”

“I don’t hear you denying it.”

He merely laughed.  Just then, Fluttershy came back wheeling a trolley with a teapot, three cups and saucers, and a tray of scones on it.

“I just made a fresh batch this morning.  Help yourselves, boys.  Do you need any help, Mark?  I could feed you one if you like?”

“Umm, no.  I’m fine, thanks.”

“Oh.  Alright. How do you like your tea?”

With my conversation put on hold while Fluttershy was there, I had to choke back my desire to strangle the strange being until he came up with some straight answers.  Meanwhile, I watched and listened to his antics.  He apparently really liked tea as evidenced by biting the cup and saucer in half, chewing thoughtfully, and then swallowing it with a sigh of satisfaction.  That the rest of the tea stayed in its half of the remaining cup was quite fascinating, as was the fact that we were apparently drinking and eating while on the roof.  How we got that way, I had failed to even notice.  Fluttershy took it all in stride, and I decided that I wasn’t going to give Discord the satisfaction of seeing me react to his antics either.

Fluttershy concluded what she was talking about.  “… so Applejack felt that I would be a better teacher for Mark.”

“Sadly, I must concur,” Discord replied.  “I suppose I can’t complain too much.  After all, that mare managed to get him to crash three times versus the one-a-day events so far.”

“I will master flight if it’s the last thing I do if only to spite you, Discord.”

“Now, boys, let’s not be nasty.  Mark, I’m sure Discord didn’t mean anything by it, did you?”  She looked pointedly at him.

Remarkably, he did seem to capitulate.  “Not at all, Fluttershy.  I’m merely an interested observer.”

I set down my cup and turned to the self-styled Lord of Chaos. As entertaining as the repartee was, my first responsibility was to my job. “So with the possibility of re-hashing already well-plowed ground…”

Discord’s eyes rolled disturbingly around in his sockets.  The expression of speech was not supposed to mean tighter and tighter spirals.  “Not even ten minutes… here it comes…”

“…as I was saying, do you know anything about where Celestia and Luna have gone and how we can get them back?”

Discord waved his half-a-teacup absently.  The liquid inside sloshed but refused to spill.  “Why do you think I am no longer collecting bird droppings?”  At my confused look, he continued.  “I was petrified when Sun-butt and Moon-butt left, and with my far reduced perceptions at the time, I have no clue where they went.”

He then took the time to unchew a scone and delicately set it on my plate.  I decided to just leave it there, thank you very much.  He pointedly looked at it and I shook my head. 

“Actually, I am referring to time magic.  After I promised that I would help, the Elements freed me.  Unfortunately, my results were the same as Twilight’s.  Any attempt to go back in time through pony magic or chaos magic results in a split in the time stream as soon as either of us gets close to the event.”

I frowned skeptically.  “So you promised…?”

He smiled with a twinkle in his eye, which he then proceeded to pluck out and eat… first the twinkle, then his eye.  “I understand your suspicions, but even the Lord of Chaos will not go against his word, especially to a dear friend.”  He grinned at Fluttershy and brought his cup close to the mare.  She smiled proudly and clicked it with hers. 

“Besides, your Loud and Overbearing ruler already asked me the same thing.  She was quite respectful and polite about it, which I didn’t expect.  Something of a different pony in private, I suppose.”

I snorted.  “I beg to differ.  Trixie is just as likely to laugh in your face no matter who is around.”

His grin stretched most of the way across his face.  “That’s just because you’re so amusing!  Really, Marcus, you should take responsibility for the disasters you cause.”  He winked.  “I do.” 

I flicked an ear at my childhood name.  Had he just guessed it?  More importantly, was he implying I was in Equestria because of him?  How had he known I had tripped into the mirror portal?  Or was that another guess?  Somehow, I didn’t think any further attempts to get straight answers would be worthwhile, so I turned back to the reason why I was here in the first place – besides to be patched up, of course.

“So, Fluttershy – is Applejack right?  Can you teach me how to fly properly?”

“Oh, umm… maybe?  I mean, Rainbow Dash is such a great flyer, and if she can’t teach you, I’m not sure that I can.”

I sighed in exasperation.  “Yeah, she’s a great flyer, but she’s a lousy instructor.  I set a new record for crashes today. Anything has got to be better than that!”

“I suppose you’re right.  I mean, if you really want, I could try to teach you.”

“I have confidence in you, Fluttershy.”  Not much confidence, but anypony had to be better than Dash.

“Let’s glide down to the meadow behind the house so we don’t disturb any of my animal friends.  Discord, would you be a dear and put everything back in my kitchen?”

Discord leaned forward with wide eyes. “Everything?!”

The mare smiled and gave him a mock glare, clearly much more amused than angry.

“Oh, alright, I know what you meant.”  With that, Discord and the tea set disappeared – also my saddlebags, I noticed.  I hoped I’d get them back, though they would probably have one of those jumping snake gags inside the next time I opened them.

Fluttershy broke me from my thoughts.  “Can you glide down to the ground safely?”

She definitely earned her title as the Element of Kindness.  “Well, I am sure I can survive it, but I tend to get going too fast.”  At least I had some experience in doing that much.

“Please hold out your wings in your gliding position for me.”  She spread out her wings to illustrate the position she wanted.  I did my best to comply.

She looked my wings over and gave a nod.  “Now, don’t worry about speed.  I’ll have my front hooves on your back and I will make sure you stay at the same rate.  And don’t use your flight magic at all.  Just concentrate on keeping your wings in exactly that shape.”

She hovered off of the roof and positioned herself directly above me as I reached the edge of her roof.  I felt her forehooves grip against my back at the base of my wings.

“Whenever you are ready, Mark.  I’ve got you.”

Knowing that I was in the caring hooves of a mare that had doubtless helped many an injured bird re-learn how to fly made me feel immensely better.  I pushed off and, like she said, worked on just keeping my wings locked in place.   When I felt her hooves pull back on me slightly, I rotated them a touch to slow down.  By the time we landed, her hooves no longer had to hold me from moving forward too quickly. 

Fluttershy smiled as she hovered in front of me.  “There!  That wasn’t so scary, now was it?”

I couldn’t help but smile back.

I took the opportunity to look around.  There were pens and a chicken coop but plenty of space in between for me to train.  She led me to the middle of the lawn and Fluttershy held out her wings.

“Let me see how you place your wings for take-off.”

I spread my wings in what I hoped was the right way given what Steady had shown me.

“Hmmm…  A bit too aggressive.  Let me help you get it right… if you don’t mind?  Touching your wings, that is?”

Was Fluttershy blushing?  I never gained the impression from others that touching the wings was that intimate.  I shrugged. “Go right ahead.”

The mare used her hooves to reposition my wings and feather-spread.

“There!  Now I want you to start a hover.  Gently beat your wings in that position, but don’t try to draw on your magic yet.”

I did as instructed, feeling like an overgrown fan, but at least I wasn’t hurtling off somewhere.

“Are you feeling any lift?”

“Not yet.  It’s like when I had my first lesson with Steady Flight before I learned how to draw on my flight magic.”

“That’s fine.  I just want you to get used to that wing-stroke for a stable hover.”

After another minute or so, I said, “I think I’ve got it.  Now what?”

“Now we introduce some magic.  Just a little!  Believe me, I’m not a strong flier, but I can maintain a hover or slow drift for a long time on just a small amount of magic.”

“Okay, here goes.”  I found my well of flight magic and drew upon it cautiously.  I suddenly shot vertically into the air, leaving the ground behind at a dizzying rate.

“I said just a little…” Fluttershy’s voice faded into the distance.

For some reason, I couldn’t seem to shut off the flow of magic. I just kept going up and up.  The air grew colder as I powered upward like an elevator to the stratosphere, and still I climbed higher.  Then I started gasping for breath as the air grew thin. My vision began to go dark, and the last thing that I saw was the far distant landscape below much like I had last seen from the comfort of an Airbus A380.  I could also see the blackness of space above me and the slight curvature of the planet from my altitude.

‘Where’s the call button on this crazy ride…?’ was my last thought before I blacked out.


# # # # # # # # #