//------------------------------// // CH11: Less Crashing a Wedding, More Laying Siege to One // Story: A Stallion's Man // by Spirit Shift //------------------------------// A gentle light pierced the simple cracks in the large hardwood barn, where Barrett had drifted off into a fitful, alcohol-fueled slumber. The day was fresh, the birds sang a happy tune as they gathered in the rafters and all was well in Sweet Apple Acres. This was of course if one assumed a delirious human wasn’t woken in a fit of horror. Barrett, dirt covered, shot up from his prone position on the Barn floor, eyes wide as he blindly stared ahead of himself. “Help, now,” was all the human could muster before the heavy ache in his head interrupted his train of thought. “Aaaah, for the love of,” Barrett groaned as he pressed his forearm hard over his eyes. In was there for several minutes the human sat, he did not move, he did not speak, he sat as silent as the grave. The birds above had fled. This left the human in a bard, the smell of alcohol, apples, and woodchips his only companions. Barrett pondered if life were worth living, that in a world where one can wake up in such pain, would not the greatest mercy be death? However, as the human sat and muttered frivolous obscenities and threats to Solaris, something sudden and unexpected brought the human to himself once more. The sturdy reinforced doors of the barn were thrown asunder. The doors did not merely fly inward, they instead flew inward and over the shocked human who starred bleary-eyed into the bright day. The now barren entrance to the barn was met with a single silhouette. “Dearest Barrett, I have come to collect you, as you instructed,” The familiar and far too loud voice of Artemis said as he plodded into the room. Barrett cursed under his breath as he took in the prince who stood wings flared, legs wide and eyes fierce, a moonlit fire set behind his cyan orbs. “Artemis, stop yelling, I’m hung the shit over.” “Oh, my apologies,” Artemis said his voice lowered to a whisper. “I may have got caught in the moment.” Barrett shook his head with another breathless fit of cursing before he stood, his legs wobbled as he dusted himself off, but held all the same. ‘Yeah, well that’s my fault anyway. You got here faster than I’d expected, that’s for sure.” “For such as myself teleporting from Canterlot’s perimeter was nothing,” The stallion grinned head held high as he spoke. “Though it did take me a few moments to make it outside of the city barrier before doing so." “Oh right, I guess the barrier would make teleporting to and fro a bit difficult,” Barrett said as he rubbed a hand against the side of his head. “Indeed, which means our daring rescue of friend Dusk Shine, will be of the flying sort. Come my dearest, let us make haste to battle,” Artemis gave Barrett no time to respond before he dashed out of the barn. Barrett took a moment to flick a hand through his hair, smell his shirt, gag a bit and then silently follow the long gone prince. Barrett groaned as the brilliance of Solaris’ light hit him in full all at once. “Kill me,” he said both arms up in defense against the cruel reality of the sun. Artemis looked back to the staggered Barrett in all his debilitated glory. “Quickly dear Barrett mount me,” Artemis said from his position ahead of the now red-faced human. “Now,” Artemis insisted with a shake of his rump. Barrett spluttered as he backed himself toward the gaping barn door. “Shit Artemis, this is so not the time for that. Also, I’m not gay, you crazy magic horse.” Artemis’ brow knit together, his smile faded into a puzzled frown. It only took a moment before the stallion erupted into a fit of hysterical laughter. Barrett could naught but watch as the cackling mad stallion’s horn began to glow. He barely felt the sudden shift of weight as he was suddenly wrenched from the earth and slowly pulled toward the wielder of unholy and entirely not fair magics. “Put me down,” Barrett said arms flailed helplessly as he reached for anything to steady and bar himself from the defiance against physics and common decency. “As you wish,” Artemis managed to say between strings of faltering laughter. Barrett had little time to rejoice as he felt himself land a top something soft and firm. Barrett looked down to note his seat on Artemis’ back, he had only the time to pat the incredibly soft and silky coat beneath him before a particular pair of wings mere inches in front of him spread wide. “Oh,” Barrett stuttered as in a sudden flash of feathers and laughter Artemis took to the skies, ten, fifty, a hundred feet and he continued to rise. Barrett looked over the side of his impromptu steed, he shouldn’t have done that. His mind and gaze spiraled. In a display of one who is and has never been designed to fly, Barrett wrapped his arms around Artemis’ barrel and prayed to whatever god was listening. He then prayed that the god listening wasn’t Solaris. As the wind rushed and the sharp mind shattering vertigo met a finite equilibrium. Barrett found that perhaps flight wasn’t the single worst concept in the history of evolution, and then he looked down once more. Sick bile burned in the back of Barrett’s throat, his body racked with an intense need to relieve his night of revelry across the vast landscape beneath him. “What is the matter, do you not enjoy riding me?” Artemis asked a single eye gazed back at the hunched and woozie human. Artemis was awarded a poignant answer when a foam-like spray rained down over his side and pulled away by the air current. “I hate, everything,” Barrett coughed and wretched once more over the undeserving world below. Artemis was an ancient pony, very old indeed, it is with this age that he’d learned many valuable and harsh lessons. The lesson he learned today, however, was both harsh and useful. “I suppose a brisk flight while suffering a rather impressive hangover was not on your daily regime, was it?” the prince asked having returned his sights to the world before him, rather than that behind or a top him. “Don’t stop,” Barrett managed as he adjusted himself again. He held tight to his courier, eyes squinted as he attempted to stare past Artemis and toward the ever looming city of Canterlot which grew closer with every second. “Are you--” Artemis looked back again, only to find his words lost in the gaze of his dearest human. Barrett’s eyes even squinted due to wind pressure held a subtle flame, like the flickering heat of a fireplace. A flame that would not burn, but warm, it coasted the life of those who dared to see it. Artemis was lost in those eyes, his heart pounded as Barrett stared ahead against the elements and against the wracked shudders of his pained body. Artemis could not help but smile, his face even as the headwind ripped by felt the heat of the human’s spirit and he sighed wistfully. “As you wish, my love,” Artemis corrected, as the duo flew on the city now well within sight the barrier, however, was not. “It’s already started,” Barrett said as he scooched forward which caused the unprepared Artemis to tip a tad forward. Like flies, the swarms of Changeling drones buzzed over, around through, and about the city buildings and streets. Their wings buzzed as they dove and swatted at any pony unlucky enough to catch their eye. Artemis growled a deep throaty noise that sent a shiver down Barrett’s spine. In a burst of speed, the prince soared into the first Changeling collective, horn shrouded in a deep blue, sparks and ozone wafted from the appendage to the surprise and beguile of the unprepared drones. What followed was not a fight. That Barrett was thoroughly convinced of, the drones barely had time to acknowledge the ambush before hues of magic poured down like a tidal wave atop them. They managed only a harsh gasp before the small group was flung into the cobbled streets below, where the lay a mess of limbs that twitched mindlessly. “Holy shit, that was,” Barrett’s voice trailed off as Artemis’ peeled high into the spiraling towers that made up the more significant portion of the city in whole. “A blight such as these cretins shall know the eternal woe of the Lunar Knight,” Artemis said the glow about his horn grew denser, the color no longer a dark blue, but a piercing black. “Um, Artemis, are, are you cool? I mean, we kinda need to get to the castle,” Barrett yelled above the rushing wind and hum of magic. Artemis smirked as he looked back, eyes drawn to the human’s own. “Aye, and we shall, but that does not forbid us from causing some turmoil on the way. What say you, shall we plunge these worms into anarchy?” Barrett rolled his neck and shrugged. “Yeah okay,” he said with a half-cocked smile. The sky was wrought with the cries of battle. The swarms of the Changeling invasion were met with the unstoppable force of a very distraught alicorn and his far more unstable, unbalanced and far less threatening human companion. Wave after wave of the love suckers charged and like the precession before them, they were met with the fierce aura of their targets. Through the buzzing battalion of battle-born drones, the castle loomed ever closer. The grand antechamber, where the royal wedding had been planned, held a view that gazed out over the Canterlot horizon. At this moment, however, to the discredit of the view and unbeknownst to the occupants of said chamber. The only sight of note through the massive trifold windows that gazed out unto the world was the ever approaching form of a certain heroic duo. Barrett panted as air ripped past his face. While the forms were blurred at their current speeds, he could make out a large gathering of bodies through the rather convenient windows before him. Barrett gulped as he took note of the city at large. At this stage, there was no doubt the climactic finale to this story was very close. The love of the engaged would repel the Changeling hive and save the day. He shuddered as he realized how late to the party he really was. The question gripped hard to his mind as the window drew ever closer. Why had he even come, it’s not like he’d change much anyway? Well, except for where Lu-- he caught himself. Where Artemis had been at this point, he’d figured that out at least. “Let us finish this,” Artemis said as the windows came face-to-face with the prince and his rather deep seeded delight in breaking anything that stood in his way of victory. The glass exploded in a dazzling reflection of the azure bean that preceded the arrival of the pair. Barrett held an arm over his face to shield from the glass shrapnel that now sprayed down upon the podium in the center of the raised altar in the front of the chamber. The sound of surprised gasps, roars of anger and the cheers of several rather impressed stallions followed the entrance. “Who would dare?” A deep clicking voice howled above all others. Barrett managed a peek over the side of his steed at the male parallel of Queen Chrysalis. Barrett clucked his tongue as he tried to place or at least guess a name, but with the stakes at hand found nothing suitable came to mind. Artemis landed wings flared, eyes and horn still alight with magic. “It is over, you now face the might of the moon,” Barrett managed a sudden if not awkward jump from his perch. He landed on both knees before shaking he rose to his feet. “Barrett?” Dusk asked as the human looked about the room. “Biggs, what the hay are you doing here?” Rainbow followed up as he struggled against the green gloop that held him to the floor. “I um, kinda felt guilty about not being here. So, I asked Artemis for a ride and well,” Barrett tapped his chest. “I’m here now. You know even with Canterlot’s roach problem.” The King of the Changeling found his gaze glued to the new arrivals. He sized up Artemis and scoffed. However, the prince had brought with him something strange and different. The King smirked and took a step closer to the human. “Don’t ya dare go anywhere near him,” Applejack yelled at the King, who rolled his eyes and continued forth unabated. “My, my, I must say, I expected you,” the King pointed a hoof at Artemis. “But this,” he pursed his lips as he eyed Barrett. “Thing is quite the interesting little surprise. If I recall right, those fools,” he motioned to Dusk and company, "have had quite a lot to say about a Barrett. I take it that is you?” Barrett facepalmed. “Come on guys, you go to another guy’s wedding, and all you can do is talk about me? Really, that’s just tacky guys, come on,” Barrett said throwing both arms out as he turned to the guilty gaggle of stallions. All of whom, not counting Barry who seemed just happy to be there, or perhaps just delighted Barrett was there looked somewhat uncomfortable. “Well, I mean, love is in the air, darling, it felt rather appropriate at the time,” Elusive muttered at the ground. “Yeah, and it’s always super fun to talk about you,” Barry added with a thrilled wave. “Barry, you’re not helping,” Blitz said in a not so whisper whisper. “Be that as it may,” The King said with a stomp. “I am afraid this is as far as you go.” “Not the way I see it, King…?” Barrett trailed off rolling his hands and beckoning to the imposing, massive, displeased insect horse, whose face only soured further from the gesture. “King Metamorphis, King of the Changelings and as of today, ruler of Equestria as well,” The King answered with a room-rattling laugh. “Yeah you really are a nutjob aren’t ya? I mean let’s be real. You stole the power of one mare, congrats,” Barrett said as slowly applauded the bemused monarch. Bite your tongue fool,” Metamorphis said, with another chuckle. “Perhaps you are right, poor little Gleaming Shield is, after all, just one mare, with only the love of a single pathetic stallion.” The prince of love, eyes ablaze leered across the room at the bane of his marriage. “Watch your mouth,” he said teeth grinding together as he strained against his restraints. Metamorphis offered only a sneer before he returned to his new verbal opponent. “But luckily for me, you’ve delivered quite the buffet to dine on. If one mare’s love is not enough, I now have quite a few stallions to suck dry as well.” “Not as long as I draw breath,” Artemis roared discharging a bolt of energy. The bolt met one of Metamorphis’ own. The room was filled with the crackling of energy and smoke as the two royals began a battle, that if one was honest was far more satisfying than the one between the solar diarch and the Changeling King. Barrett however, rather than watch the two titans tussle, did what the magically illiterate would do and ran for his life. It took him less than a minute to scurry between the debris and panicked drone guards to that of his captured friends. “Barrett what are you doing?” Dusk whispered as the human started clawing at one glob of gloop at Dusk’s hooves. “Trying to get you free, we need Gleaming to do her barrier spell, you know, like yesterday,” The human paused to give his insufferable friend, but still a friend, a brief smile. “Come on Dusk.” Dusk returned the smile and eyes shut he released a burst of magic that melted the glueish gloop and rendered it to droopy goo. Dusk looked at Barrett who delivered a thumbs up before nudging the stallion toward his sister. Dusk quickly centered around his friends to the royal couple. “We need you to use your barrier spell.” Gleaming puzzled attempted to light her horn only for it to fizzle and her to shake her head. “I can’t, I don’t have enough power.” Her loving prince nuzzled the distraught mare. “My love will give you the power you need.” “Ergh, gag me,” Barrett pointed a finger down his open mouth. “Only with your consent dear,” Elusive said with an eyebrow wiggle. “Oh dear, I didn’t know you were into that,” Butterscotch added with a slight blush. Barrett turned to the doting couple. “Please, continue,” he said with a curt nod. Metamorphis caught the movement amongst the captives and sent a blast just above the kneeling human. “Did you think I would just sit back and do nothing, as you plot? You can’t possibly think you can stop me?” Metamorphis growled as he flew into the air and pointed down at the group. Barrett stood to his full height hands raised in surrender. “No, no, trust me, I can’t possibly stop you,” Barrett said with a smile, a smile matched by the Changeling Kling’s own smug grin. “But,” the King’s smile faded, “they can,” Barrett pointed to Gleaming and her prince, whose horns were now wrapped in a cone of their combined magic. The lovers were pulled into the air and wrapped in a cocoon of magic energy. The room gazed up at the spectacle. The power pulsed and Metamorphis found himself shaken by the raw force of love from the couple. “No, this isn’t possible,” the King swore as he felt himself be pulled from the ground. “It’s over Metamorphis, you lose,” Dusk Shine said as his friends gathered around him. “No, no, you will pay, you will all pay, you ponies and your creature,” The King seethed. His eyes were locked on Barrett who in turn had taken to standing hard against the wall. The room exploded into light, the full force of the love magic pulsed out and swatted away the Changelings in mass. The shouts of the hive could be heard long after they were flung free of the castle and even the city as a whole. When the light faded, the two ponies that wielded it drifted to the ground still in a close embrace. “That was a lot scarier up close,” Barrett mumbled as he pried himself from the wall. He’d barely made it ten feet before he was knocked from his feet, under the weight of purple fur and hooves. “Barrett,” Dusk Shine cooed as he nuzzled the struggling human beneath him. “You, you came, and you rescued me, you rescued all of us,” Dusk Shine was giggling like mad as he refused to be pried from his spot atop his crush. “I didn’t do anything. It was all you guys,” Barrett pointed with a freed hand to Dusk’s sister. Who sat nuzzling her stallion and grinning madly at her younger brother. “You saved the day, I just played decoy.” Dusk was suddenly pulled back from his spot on Barrett by a dozen hooves to the laughter of his other friends. “Come on Dusk, don’t hog him all to yourself,” Blitz said as Dusk squirmed hooves swatting at the other stallions. “Yeah, Dusky we want Barrett hug time too,” Barry added as Dusk was plopped down in front of the human with a huff and a pout. Barrett’s eye caught the open door that marked the entrance to the hall. He then took in the friends who were conversing with Dusk. He nodded and scrambled to his feet. He could feel his breath hard and heavy as he dashed for safety. His lungs burned, his head swam, but he ran, he ran as hard as he could. “Barrett, wait up, partner,” Applejack called as the other ponies in the room took note of his sprint. Barrett ran faster. Barrett looked back at the those behind him. They were on their hooves and mad on his heels. Barrett laughed and winked back at the group. “Nope, still not gay, no hugs, I gotta go, bye.”