Session 84.0 Mtangalion
“Stop that!” shouted Ember, flying in evasive loops. “As Dragon Lord, I order you…”
“Rend, kill, destroy!” boomed the giant robot dragon in a grating mechanical monotone. It fired another laser blast, which Ember barely dodged. “Destroy, destroy!” The robot deliberately trampled two carts and kicked a fence over.
Starlight Glimmer sighed. “Are you sure the other Twilight built this thing? What, did she get tired of harmony and rainbows and decide to blast away whatever magical threat showed up next? Not that I’m criticizing. I can totally respect that!”
Spike the currently-a-dragon Dog grinned. “Twilight built it to protect me from dog-nappers!” He gave Pavel a conspiratorial wink. “Talking dogs aren’t normal on Earth.”
“Pavel’s wolf, not dog!” grumbled the offended pup.
“I can totally handle this!” boasted Shining Armor the currently-a-pony Human. “I fight dragons all the time! … I just need my epic armor and weapons. And nineteen other people who also have epic armor and weapons.”
Prince Shining Armor glared at him. “This is no time for kidding around, soldier. You're familiar with your sister's inventions, aren't you? Think how we can stop this while doing the least damage.”
“To it, or to Ponyville?” asked Spike the Dragon, swooping in and breathing flames in an attempt to melt the robot’s foot. Suddenly, the robot roared and backed up, heading right towards Spike. “Gah!”
There was a whoosh and a flash of red, and Garble was there, half-buried in the ground as he struggled to hold up the giant metal paw. “Hey, flankhead! Nodragon stomps on my… uh… dragon pal… that I hang out with sometimes!”
Spike smirked. “You can say ‘friend’ if you want.”
“Shut up!” The robot lifted its foot and stomped on Garble harder. “Urk!” Stomp! “I’m okay! Dragons are…” Thud, wham! “... basically indestructible!”
“Then why did you save me?”
“I said…” Garble grabbed hold of the paw, then flew and heaved with all his strength, making the giant robot topple over. “Shut up!" He slumped to the ground, panting. "Hah! No lame-o machine is gonna beat a real dragon!”
The robot promptly tail-slapped him into somepony’s house, half-demolishing the house.
Session 84.1 Alex Warlorn
Rainbow Dash flew around in her one-seater space ship zipping along. "Whoo-hoo! No Mare's Sky finally has multiplayer! And you can own more than one giant space ship!"
-
"Attention fleet, target that little blue space ship!" Trixie commanded on the bridge of her flag ship.
"We hear and obey!" Responded her fleet.
Session 84.2 Mtangalion
Trixie's Diamond Dog bridge crew gathered behind her, grinning hugely. "Do the laugh, your majesty!" said Spot.
Trixie sniffed, nose in the air. "Trixie does not wish to do the laugh."
"Please? Please please?" The Dogs grew sad puppy eyes, whimpering and whining.
"Oh, very well." Trixie posed with one hoof raised, threw back her head and laughed, "Ohhhh HO HO HO HO!"
Rainbow Dash shuddered and kicked in her afterburners. "Even in space, I can hear that laugh!"
Princess Twilight groaned, planting her face on the computer desk. "I spent hours doing everything except the thing I was actually trying to do! When I catch up to whoever took my base..." She yawned. "Spike, is there any more coffee? Spike!"
Spike jumped, quickly minimizing the screen showing his interstellar trading empire worth billions of units. "I'll be right there, Twi!"
Session 84.3 Kendell2
Continuing something from clear back in session 63 at whitebearboy's request.
Fluttershy did the natural thing when she saw a cute talking flower and read its statements. "Aww, so cute..."
"Howdy! I'm Flowey. Flowey the Flower!"
"Hello..." said Fluttershy, not seeing anything wrong. The Flower was nice enough to offer to show her the ropes. "That's nice...I guess this must be the tutorial..."
After explaining some mechanics, Flowey finally said he'd share LOVE with her. It being capitalized normally just meant it was really important, right? He formed a bunch of white things he called friendliness pellets. "Move around! Get as many as you can!"
"Okay..." Fluttershy replied, and did as asked...only to jump when her health bar was nearly wiped out. "Ah! What happened?!"
"You idiot..." said Flowey, his face going demonic. "In this world, it's kill or BE killed!"
Fluttershy panicked as her little red heart was surrounded with bullets. "Ah! What do I do?!" she exclaimed in panic as they closed in.
When to her surprise (and Flowey's too) a little fireball appeared and blasted Flowey off screen. "Did I do that?"
She then saw a kindly goat-like humanoid come on screen. "Oh...hello..."
Session 84.4 Mtangalion
By this time, Diamond Tiara had also wandered over from the Friendship Gaming Academy to watch the battle with the giant robot dragon. She trotted up to Captain Armor, seeming unimpressed. “Um, why don’t you just put the metal dragon in a giant shield bubble? You put all of Canterlot under a shield for days that one time. Shouldn’t you be able to defeat any villain easily with that?”
Captain Armor frowned, glancing at his twin from Earth. “Miss Tiara, wasn’t it? You don’t seem that surprised to see two of me here.”
Diamond shrugged. “That’s been happening a lot. Why didn’t you put King Sombra in a bubble?”
“Well, he sealed my horn with his dark magic!”
“Huh. That was super convenient for him that he could do that,” mused Diamond. “What about the time the whole Crystal Empire nearly froze? Why didn’t you bubble the city until they fixed the Crystal Heart?”
“It wasn’t that simple!” protested Captain Armor. “The chaotic and uncontrollable winds of the far north would have worn down any shield barrier in a matter of minutes. Only a powerful artifact like the Crystal Heart...”
Diamond smirked. “So you live in a place where the natural magic nullifies your greatest strength? That doesn’t sound very smart.”
The Shining from Earth grinned, nudging the Captain. “This is like when Eight Bit brought his little brother to our O&O game. Nothing kills all the drama faster than a little kid asking simple questions, am I right?”
Captain Armor sighed. “Fine. What kind of magical defenses does this ‘robot’ have?”
Shining blinked. “Um, none that I’m aware of. Unless it magically got some when it came through the portal…” He jumped when a shadow fell over him… the robot dragon, floating in a magenta shield bubble. It flailed and shot lasers and breathed fire, but everything just bounced off the shield. “Wow, okay, I guess it really doesn’t have any.”
The young dragons, still hovering around the shielded dragon, looked annoyed. “Well, that’s no fun!” grumbled Smolder.
Shining gulped. “Um, sorry? Yeah, just remove the main logic board from that compartment in its head. It might be kinda dangerous getting to it, though, while the robot’s still…”
“Here,” said Captain Armor, levitating a circuit board that he’d easily retrieved with his magic. He blinked. “Wow, did I really solve a problem in Ponyville without any help from Twily and the girls? This feels weird.”
“Lampshades!” called out Discord, zipping past on a unicycle, wearing a plaid coat and pulling a cart loaded with lamps shaped like abstract art of himself. “Everypony, get your lampshades right here! Only two and three quarter bits each!”
Session 84.5 Alex Warlorn
"And that is why continuing to call yourselves Diamond Wolves only serves to continue to strengthen the divide between your people," Starlight Glimmer explained.
--
"Just follow me through the portal now..." The quadruped wingless Spike said leading the 'running on back up processing' giant robot dragoness through the portal as Prince Shining Armor slowly altered the state of the force field around it, letting it through.
"Well, that's one less nightmare for me to worry about," said the visiting normally human Shining Armor. "So you really get to go around naked all day?"
"I'm not naked, I'm wearing a shirt." Prince Shining Armor said, not understanding.
"HEY!" Said a second Ember pushing her head through the portal. "What stupid robot dog doing back?! Ember get rid of rival!"
Hearing herself talk like a diamond dog was too much for Ember and she back handed Garble before he'd barely managed to get out a giggle.
"Why blue lizard look kinda like Ember?" Said the Ember sticking her head through the portal.
Dragon Lord Ember didn't answer, she just put her foot on the head of the other Ember and pushed her back through!
"Ember Lord of Junkyard, you no treat Ember this way!" She said as her head fell back through the portal.
--
For reasons she did not understand, while at the furry role playing center... Rarity felt strangely attracted to the purple furred wolf man with green highlights offering her gem candy... This attraction made Rarity confused and uncomfortable ... Like something so right and so wrong burned within!
'It's likely one of the Diamond Diggers under there, or that cad Blueblood! I should ask! No I mustn't! It will destroy the fantasy! But what if something nicer awaits?! Do I ask or not?! But isn't it rude? But he makes Rarity feel nice! AHHHHH!!!!'
Rarity fled.
Meanwhile, in his purple wolf-man costume, Fancy Pants wondered who that beautiful-voiced white fox woman was... maybe she was a real kitsune in disguise or something? That just made her more alluring. He hoped Fluer didn't find out, Crystal Prep had twisted the most beautiful girl Fancy had ever met into one of Cinch's 'every person for themselves' students.
--
"So... " The teenage human Rainbow Dash asked, holding free copies of the expansion they'd all gotten thanks to Sunset Shimmer and Princess Twilight's work at Crystalsoft, "Are we gonna... ya know... ACTUALLY DO ANY OF THESE NEW ASCENSION RAIDS OR WHAT?! Or did we all go that convention just for the free popcorn?!" Rainbow Dash waved her arms dramatically.
Session 84.6 Kendell2
"So what is this game exactly?" asked Twilight, looking at a game Rainbow had gotten.
"Totally Accurate Battle Simulator," replied the Pegasus, setting up a fight between a farmer and a Barbarian (which was basically just a cave pony) and started...
Prompting the silly scene of a solid red maneless, featureless pony with a pitchfork and a cowboy hat and googly eyes charging a solid blue maneless pony with a club and googly eyes charging each other as if their weapons were pulling them rather than the other way around.
"...This isn't accurate..." Twilight said flatly.
"That's the joke..." said Rainbow Dash as the two met and the farmer was promptly smashed in the head with a club and blue won.
"...That ain't how that'd go..." said Applejack.
"Eh, it's luck..." said Rainbow Dash, starting the match again...
And promptly watching in confusion as the two collided and were spun around by their weapons completely off the ground.
"...Okay, that's funny..." Applejack admitted, before the Farmer finally won by getting a poke with the pitchfork...somehow. "But the farmer being as dumb as the cave pony better not be some kind of joke..."
"Nah, everyone is stupid, that's part of the fun..." Rainbow Dash said, setting up a large scale battle between guards and and yaks, which ended with the yaks winning both rounds...and for some reason continuing on and throwing themselves off the edge of the map the second time. "...The buck..."
After a match of one Ninja Master vs an equally priced number of normal ninjas, the former winning a pretty epic shuriken throwing battle, Rainbow set up the same with Samurai...
With the master basically being spun around the horde with his sword with his legs barely touching the ground...and losing with one enemy left.
"Huh, that's weird..." said Rainbow before trying again...and the Samurai Master just jumping into a sword and dying in a few seconds. "...Like I said, luck of the draw..."
OOC: This game is a riot.
Session 84.7 Alex Warlorn
Fluttershy in her digital space suit took in the beautiful alien landscape. "Ahhhhhh, No Mare's Sky now has multiplayer. A chance to safely interact with others without any social fear!" She spotted another player and waved. "Hello fellow Traveler!"
The other player, whose screen name unknown to Fluttershy was 'G1LD@R' drew their ray gun and pointed it at Fluttershy. "Stick 'em up!"
Session 84.8 Mtangalion
Starlight was getting so into her lecture, she didn't notice Elena padding into her office... not until the pup nipped her ankle!
"Other ponies are nice, why so rude?" growled Elena, standing shoulder to shoulder with her brother Pavel.
Pavel's ears perked back up. "In Icehome, Dogs are no good. That's what we call big bullies who think they're more important than pack!" The pups nodded to each other.
Just down another hallway, another pint-sized canine was glaring at Applejack. "I'm a Diamond Dog, dumb pony! Don't call me a Wolf!"
AJ waved a hoof, trying to placate the newly arrived student. "Now settle down, Ah didn't mean to offend... But there is kind of a resemblence, don't you think? You've got big forepaws and walk on your hind paws more, and those wolves are fluffier, but are ya really so different?"
Ruff turned his nose up. "Hah, shows what you know! In Dog Mines, a 'Wolf' is a smarty-pants who thinks they're better than everydog! It's good thing they all ran away, tails between legs! That means more gems for... us?"
Ruff rounded a corner and found himself nose to nose with Pavel, just leaving the guidance counselor's office. The two pups stood there gawking at each other, and then began growling...
Session 84.9 Ardashir
"Shiny! Are you in here?" With a flare of magic, a second Cadence stumbled out of the portal. Both Shining Armors tilted their ears forward and whickered appreciatively as the pretty pink alicorn examined herself. "Hey? What! Is this some weird VR zone for the game I stumbled in to?" She looked up and caught sight of the original Cadence, staring in shock. "Hey! No stealing my in-game avatar! Is this some trick by Aunt Celestia?" She walked over, stumbling a bit on four legs. "Yeesh, she doesn't even look like me. Where's half her gear, anyway? This is a cheap copy!"
The normally peaceable and gentle look Princess Cadence bore vanished in a heartbeat, replaced by ears pinned fury.
"Cheap copy!" Cadence's horn blazed with spellfire. "Now listen here, you, you whatever you are!"
And in his home in the Chaos Realm Discord watched it all on 'the Chaos Channel', laughing uproariously.
"Oh, I just KNEW that making that Mirror Gate magically attractive would be entertaining!"
Session 84.10 Ardashir
Applejack turned away from the window looking on the defeated robot outside. "Okay, so that's over an' done with. Hopefully the rest o' the day will be a little more peaceable."
Her ears flattened as the sounds of a snarling battle came from around the corner, mingled with shrieks of fear and cheers.
"Me an' mah big mouth."
Once around the corner she saw Pavel the Diamond Wolf puppy and Ruff the Diamond Dog pup rolling over the carpet in a biting, snarling ball. Tufts of white and grey fur flew as they snarled untranslatable words AJ strongly suspected were not compliments.
Overhead four of the 'student six' hovered.
"I can't watch!" Ocellus had her claws over her eyes. "This is horrible!"
"Ooh," Silverstream said as one of the pups yelped in sudden sharp pain. "I think that hurt."
"This is great!"" Gallus cheered as the two pups briefly broke apart. They bristled and bared fangs at each other, hunched low as they circled. Then they flew back at each other with wild yelps. "Hah! Back in Griffonstone there'd be a dozen griffs betting on this by now."
"FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" Smolder clapped her claws. "Now this is something dragons like! Watching two guys who hate each other rip one another to pieces!" She and Gallus high-clawed. "Forget those 'loot the dungeon' things, this is a game for REAL predators!"
The two pups broke apart again. One of Ruff's ears was torn, and Pavel limped back, one foreleg tucked under him. Before they could leap at each other again Applejack hurried between them.
"Okay, THAT'S IT!" She forced Pavel back against the wall, pinning him there. Ruff's eyes blazed and he tried to leap at Pavel, only to subside at a glare from Applejack. She frowned around at the other students. Gallus and Smolder tried to look abashed but only partly succeeded. "Ah'm thinking we need a few lessons on 'friends don't let friends fight'! Y'all can study them this weekend when you woulda had a break." The students suddenly looked very unhappy. Protests rose. Applejack silenced them with a look. They left.
"Filthy dirt dog not Pavel's friend!" The little wolf growled, pain thickening his voice.
"Ruff not like dumb wolf either!" Ruff growled back. He fingered his bloody ear and winced.
"Oh! Oh, my, what happened?" Fluttershy hurried up, Alisa on her tail. Pavel's sister Elena hurried behind, her short puppy legs taking two steps to the adults' one, yipping in excitement and worry. Alisa bristled at the sight of Ruff but subsided at a warning snort from Applejack. Nothing could stop Elena's high-pitched growl before she began licking her unwilling brother. Applejack quickly explained and the two took the wounded foes off to tend to them, Fluttershy steering Ruff along before her and Alisa holding the complaining Pavel by the scruff of his neck like a newborn pup. Elena gave Ruff one last glare and followed her brother.
Applejack relaxed as Starlight walked up. "Oh, no! I was trying to convince the school's Diamond Dogs and Diamond Wolves to not fight." She looked at the mess. "It doesn't seem like I did very well. I'm beginning to wonder if we're going to have to expel some of them."
"Maybe," Applejack said as she looked at a picture on the wall, showing the time Twilight turned them all into Breezies. She smiled as she began to get an idea. "An' maybe not."
Session 84.11 Alex Warlorn
"Anyone seen Princess Twilight?" Human Rainbow Dash asked. "These new raids aren't going to play themselves."
"I uh," Sunset Shimmer said looking awkward. "I might have tied her up."
"WHAT?! HAVE YOU GONE EVIL AGAIN?"
"NO! Nonono! It's just until she calms down! I told her how I was getting the money together for my new text book and she was going all 'you get your lessons for free but have to pay for your books and PE uniforms?! Celestia and Luna of this world must be secretly evil!' ... Like I said, just until she calms down."
"Well, there are a bajillion new raids here and I want to start raiding! There's even a rumor that says that super overpowered 'Majesty' summons that some players saw on the server attacking a player who looked just like her is possible if you collect an item that has a 0.1% drop chance of all of the new Ascension raid bosses except for the end game one."
"Is it that same forum that told you that fake rumor about 'Seventh Element of Harmony Armor' drop for Discord?"
"... Maybe?"
Session 84.12 Alex Warlorn
It was the winter equinox at the hot spring of dark magic. The same spring that had corrupted the mane six into evil versions of themselves (and then had corrupted Princess Luna into Nightmare Moon and nearly all of Ponyville eventually), preying on their most petty and selfish desires stripped of their more noble traits. Thankfully a cure had been found and the spring purified... hadn't it? Everything goes somewhere.
Six violent bubbling spots started in the spring, dark magic glowed within... six ponies emerged, coughing and gagging on the water and taking their first breaths.
-
"That old place near the edge of Everfree? It's called the Creepy Abode... ponies say it's haunted, and it's also half infested with wild vines and who knows what else, no pony goes near the place!" Pinkie Pie explained to her tour group.
-
"STARLIGHT! IT'S AWFUL! SOMEPONY STOLE THE ENTIRE CONTENTS OF YOUR BEDROOM!" Her father wailed.
'Well, all the evidence is gone then.' "Oh no, how horrible, that's too bad." Starlight Glimmer said simply.
-
'Pinkie Pie' finished decorating her claimed room ('Rainbow Dash' was happy to crash on the couch). "She had good taste at least."
http://mlp-gameloft.wikia.com/wiki/Creepy_Abode
"Hey! I found this great role playing game we could play, called FATAL or something!" 'Twilight Sparkle' said.
Session 84.13 Mtangalion
Princess Twilight massaged her forehead with a hoof, then took a deep breath and trotted into the school conference room, putting on her best impression of Celestia’s smile #12 (I’m going to keep smiling if it kills me).
The gathered canines turned to look at her. On the Diamond Wolves’ side, Prince Erik rose, large and imposing, standing over Elena, Pavel, still favoring one forepaw, and Alisa, who seemed deceptively calm. The Diamond Dogs were represented by Rover, Ruff, Chancellor Jim from Dimondia… and oddly Trixie, wearing her ‘Queen of the Diamond Dogs’ crown again. Applejack stood in between, keeping the two sides separated.
“Thank you all for coming to this meeting,” said Princess Twilight brightly, “instead of pulling your students out of the school immediately. Or threatening international war. Again.” She cleared her throat. “Even though this is a gaming academy, we can’t have real life combat going on outside of official class events.”
“Then ponies shouldn’t have invited Dogs to school!” growled Prince Erik. “Not ten minutes here, and they’re already starting fight!”
Rover growled louder, putting a paw protectively around Ruff. “My nephew wasn’t even here ten minutes before a stuck up Wolf called him names and attacked. Typical ponies, they lied when they said their school was safe!”
“School was safe until bully Dogs showed up!” yipped Pavel. “Tell them to go away.”
“What!? Wolves should go away!” shouted Ruff. “Ponyville is in Diamond Dog territory.”
Erik stepped forward, eyes narrowing. “Diamond Dog territory is underground, they don’t own surface. If they can’t behave...”
Trixie leaned towards Jim. “Is it too late for the Eternal Queen for Life Trixie to abdicate?”
Jim patted her shoulder sympathetically. “Much too late, your highness.”
Erik and Rover started snarling at each other again.
Elena facepawed and whined. “Can’t everywolf and dog just stop fighting?! Creatures are supposed to be learning about fun and friendship!”
“Ah think that’s an excellent suggestion,” said Applejack. She winked to Twilight.
Princess Twilight nodded to AJ, then concentrated, lifting eight surprised and squirming canines off the floor in her magic. “If you’re going to act like children, then maybe you should try *being* children for a while… in the Interdimensional Gaming Room!” Colors swirled and twisted as they fell through a portal, splashing down in shallow water just off a beach of some sort. “The first group who makes it to the top of the mountain gets to have their way!”
A soggy Trixie padded ashore and shook the water out of her coat… then shrieked at the sight of her Diamond Dog puppy forepaws. “Not again! Trixie must protest!”
Elena, Pavel, and Ruff took one look at their relatives reduced to cute puppies the same age as them, and completely lost it, rolling on the beach as they barked with laughter.
“Arrogant pony princess, she’s gone too far!” squeaked Alisa. She waved her little paw, but only a few sparks of dark magic flew from her claws. Her puppy ears dropped. “Uh oh…”
Session 84.14 Alex Warlorn
"'I have made money from this Cheese Shop, and instead of investing it back into the Cheese Shop, I'm going to invest it in my Carrot Shop instead! BWAHAHAHA! I AM SO EVIL!!!'"
"Uh, Princess Twilight, this new Super villain doesn't really seem all that evil," Sweetie Belle said.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN? Of course he's super evil!"
"Ah'm pretty sure raisin' capital for one venture with another venture isn't illegal," Apple Bloom said.
Session 84.15 Ardashir
Smolder was given another chance to GM a game with the Student Six, this time the Power Ponies RPG. Twilight was keeping a close eye on things as she presented the main villain.
"Bwa-ahahah!" Smolder shot up into the air over the students, her wings wide. "And Dr. Mindwarp says, 'Victory is at hand! Now I will mind control everyone into being generous and giving all their stuff away to the needy!'"
"Huh?" Smolder frowned as Ocellus flew up to her. "Wait, how is he being evil by making people be generous?"
"Oh, I know, I know!" Silverstream waved one claw frantically. "He's evil because mind control is a compromise of the individual right to determine one's own actions?"
"Huh? No!" Smolder rolled her eyes. Twilight' eyes widened as the little dragon said, "Because if ya let all the weaklings live they drag the species down! Every dragon knows that."
"Tell it like it is, sister!" Garble yelled from the door, a cart sitting next to him. "Remind these ponies that we're apex predators. We're the ones who decide what morality is!" He froze as a call from Pinkie Pie echoed down the hall. "Yeah, okay, I'm hurrying with the balloons." He quickly pushed the cart out of sight.
"What? That's not, I mean, no, ugh!" Twilight facehoofed. "Note to self. Remember that Ember and especially Spike are not normal dragons in personality."
And all unseen by her, a pony that looked like Twilight save for the black torn cloak she wore and the cruel glee on her face also overheard as she crept by the window.
"Heh, pretty clever," 'Mean Twilight' whispered as she peeked through the window at the defiant Smolder facing Twilight and the other students. "Hey, maybe I should use those loser friends of mind and write our own games." She grinned to see Smolder sit down with a huff as Twilight took over. "And I know who we can get some ideas from."
Session 84.16 Alex Warlorn
"I don't buy this." Human Rainbow Dash reading a Legend of Cadenza manual, "So there's two breeds of aquatic ponies, and they really really don't get along in spite of both being basically fish, and most people can't even tell the difference?"
---
"Hey Twilight!" Called the Earth pony to the Alicorn Princess.
"Yes Applejack?"
"Ya know how the diamond wolves and diamond dogs really didn't like each other?"
"Applejack for the last time, if I'm going to have that 'trickster mentor' license that came with my coronation into being a princess (which actually explains a few things with my time as Celestia's student), I might as well put it to good use! A mile in each other's paws is what they need!"
"This ain't about that! Aquastria wants to send one of the merponies here too!"
"So what? Queen Novo and King Leo settled their territory borders in Mortal Com-bat."
-
"MORTAL COM-BAT!"
The two video thestrals on screen tore each other to piece, digital blood splattering everywhere on screen. Queen Novo and King Leo mashing their controllers with absurdly complex combos.
-
"Yeah! But that doesn't mean there isn't still bad blood going around!"
"HOUSE THIEF!"
"SEA-HOARDER!"
"And it sounds like Silverstream and Princess Wavedancer VII just met."
A pink merpony with blue hair and Silverstream rolled by, her tail wrapped around his throat while he had his claws around her gills, the sound of things being smashed and water splashing everywhere.
"SHOO-BE-DO FOREVER!"
Session 84.17 Ardashir (Inspired by Knights of the Dinner Table)
"Now!" Twilight sat down for her special session of roleplaying with the Student Six. She trusted that Rarity and Applejack would be able to keep an eye on the Diamond Wolves and Dogs while she attended to this. She focused her attention on Smolder. "Since it seems that some of you have had a few little problems with your friendship lessons of late, I decided to show you how much fun and valuable knowledge can be with a game of O&O..."
"Hey, can we get back to the stuff with Dr. Mindwarp then?" Smolder grinned and rubbed her chin. "Because I had this idea..." She swallowed as Twilight gave her a fearsome smile Ember would have envied.
"Not right now." She handed out their usual character sheets. "Now! It all starts with you being summoned to a mountaintop monastery..."
***
"WHAT!" Gallus raised one claw to toss his dice, subsiding at a warning glance from Twilight. "The treasure is a buncha books? We oughta burn the dump down!"
"Spell books?" Ocellus, now playing the group wizard, asked hopefully.
"No, dear, books of non-magical knowledge," Twilight said. As the students groaned she said, "What? But this is a treasure! Knowledge that was hidden from sapient creature for centuries."
"She's right!" Smolder leaped to her feet. "This is a treasure!" The smile on Twilight's face began to slip as the dragon said, "Just think of how much some dumb libarians -- uh, no offense, teacher -- would pay for lost and irreplaceable books! We're sittin' on a gold mine!"
The students began to cheer at the idea of their newfound wealth as Twilight schemed frantically.
***
"So the new workman's compensation laws, that I didn't just invent, will ruin your horrible scheme to sell those wonderful books -- I mean, it's not really profitable any more."
The students looked downhearted, all save Smolder who rubbed her chin a moment. "Actually, even if we do pay that new comp-whatever thing, we'll still be rolling in loot. What?" She shrugged at Twilight's stare. "Hey, dragons know wealth."
***
"And the invading alien space soldiers demand you hand the books over now!" Twilight said, her voice shrill and her mane starting to become frazzled.
Smolder frowned and went into a huddle with her friends. They talked, and she said. "I make a counteroffer. 'Hey, we'll pay you guys instead of fighting over it, and in exchange you help us conquer the world. Okay?" As Twilight spluttered, she said, "I read the rulebook. With the money we're offering we should get a killer bonus on our diplomacy roll."
"Yona want be general!" The little yak girl cheered.
Twilight watched in silent despair as the dice rolled. "And so... with a natural 20... your new space soldier mercenary army obeys your every order."
***
"Um, Miss Twilight, are you okay?" Silverstream asked, carefully extending one claw. She flinched and pulled it back when the maddened mare looked at her through the tangled witch-locks of her mane. "You seem kinda tense. We can always stop if..."
"If you can't take it," Smolder idly buffed her claws.
"NO!" Twilight almost cackled out, her voice cracking. The students recoiled, all save Smolder, as Twilight said, "DESPITE you thinking you were clever by having your soldiers immunized... DESPITE having them maintain their weapons and equipment to avoid breakdowns when there's no chance of resupply... DESPITE rigging your new superdreadnought's AI to be able to cast spells powered by the antimatter reactors..."
"I thought that was pretty clever," Ocellus said, blushing as her friends cheered for her.
The Student Six froze as Twilight laughed with mad glee.
"Like I said, DESPITE ALL THAT! You still made your error when you tried to force the School for Gifted Unicorns -- I MEAN! For Gifted Wizards, to accept you and your ship as the greatest wizards ever!" She giggled, sounding nearly hysterical. "Because they forced you to cast the most powerful fireball spell ever. And it DESTROYED THE PLANET!"
"Fire, the cause and solution of all life's problems," Smolder leaned back in her chair.
"A-ha!" Twilight waved the rulebook. "But since you magic items get all their power from the campaign world, they all stop working!"
The students looked worried. Then Smolder spoke.
"Actually? No." Twilight blinked owlishly as Smolder said. "We still got the ship, and it came here through a wormhole. Or so you said."
"Ye-yes," Twilight said, her voice going quiet as her eyes widened in horror.
"Well, you told us those things permit time travel, just like Miss Glimmer's spells that she's never supposed to use..."
"Did someone mention me?" An alicorn Starlight Glimmer stuck her head into the room. Her current self stepped in and froze upon seeing her. The alicorn said, "Glimmer, you didn't try telling the Wolves they're no different than Diamond Dogs yet, did you? Because if you did, then let me tell you..." Their voices faded as the two Starlights trotted down the corridor.
The students and Twilight stared after them.
"Okay, that happened," Smolder said before returning to the game. "Anyway! We'll just fly in the wormhole and time travel back to before the whole mess started."
"Yona hit ship's self-destruct switch. What?" The yak looked at her friends. "Yona think this all get way out of hoof."
"So there we are, back at the monastery, now what?" Smolder smiled evilly as she said it.
***
"So despite all you could do, the experts who piled the books into their saddle bags all spontaneously leap to their deaths off the cliffside!" Twilight whooped for glee, seemingly not noticing that the students had left hours ago and the sun was long set. "So I win! I WIN! A-hahaha! Isn't that right, Miss Smarty Pants?" She addressed the last question to a crude pencil drawing of her beloved doll. It, along with a bound and gagged Spike, was all her company at the moment.
"Uh, Twilight?" Starlight Glimmer peeked around the corner. "I just had a long conversation with my future self -- once that would have sounded so strange -- and I think we may have a problem where the wolves and dogs are concerned. Something else may have slipped into that pocket dimension."
***
"I AM SQUIRK! MASTER OF ALL!" The fire-red octopus howled as it waved its tentacles around, with snarling little canids hanging from all of them by their fangs. "So let go you fleabags!"
Session 84.18 Mtangalion
At the top of a winding path overlooking the beach, eight wolf and dog pups flopped down, panting with tongues lolling. Scruff shook himself, then padded over and peered down the edge. “Do you think we gave it the slip?”
“Wolves are going to sue!” grumbled Prince Erik, when he got his breath back. “Tentacles should not be in game for pups!”
“Aw, why did we run away?” whined Rover. “I wanted to beat the octopus up and take its shinies!”
“Why’d we dance and sing song about running away?” wondered Pavel aloud.
“Very old magic,” said Alisa peevishly. “Now stop talking about it.”
Elena grinned, tail wagging. “Can we sing another one?”
“No!” yipped Alisa, looking around as if a catchy melody might ambush them at any moment. “Anything but that!”
Trixie climbed atop a boulder. “Excuse me, fellow puppies! Queen Trixie has something to say.” She posed, putting a paw to her chest. “Clearly, the Furry and Fabulous Trixie is the dog who should be in charge! Firstly, she has participated in a similar game before, when we raced our Chaos counterparts. She is eminently qualified to lead our group to the exit before the hideous slimy squid beast finds us again! Secondly…”
Chancellor Jim pawed her shoulder. “Ah, your majesty?”
Trixie glared. “Do not interrupt while Queen Trixie is…” She blinked. The Diamond Wolves were gone. Crudely constructed dummies stood in their place, with big painted on fake smiles. “Whaaaat?!!”
Jim sighed. “What are your orders now, majesty?”
Trixie pointed. “After those wolves!”
Applejack raised an eyebrow, while Starlight paced and Twilight peered into the crystal ball in her office. “Should we go in after them? How long do ya reckon it’ll take them to find the exit, Twi?”
“It shouldn’t take long at all,” said Twilight reassuringly. “Erik and Jim are intelligent leaders, Alisa is clever and sneaky, and Trixie… well, they have Trixie.”
“Hey!” protested Starlight.
“Plus, it’s obvious that the puzzle will require the Dogs and Wolves to work together. Cliched, even! They couldn’t possibly not figure that out.”
Applejack pointed a hoof at the crystal ball. “Ah wouldn’t be so sure.”
Twilight looked again, and saw all the Diamond Wolf pups stuck in a tar trap… while all the Dogs strutted right on past, snickering childishly. “Well, okay, they have some animosity to work through! But sooner or later… Oh dear.” Now the Dogs were dangling in a net together, and the Wolves razzed them and scampered on their way. “I’d better turn down the difficulty. And activate the hints. Lots of hints…”
Session 84.19 Alex Warlorn
"Come on come on, what taking them all so long?!" Tirek, attorney at Law cursed checking out the World of Horsecraft server monitors.
"Problem Trekkie?" Lead Programmer Discord asked.
"Don't EVER call me that... and it's been two or three weeks since the release of the Ascension expansion... and not a single party had completed all the new raids, unlocked the secret final raid for the expansion... AND THE COOL CGI CUT-SCENE OF ME DRIVING A GIANT SPACE SWORD INTO EQUUS!!! ... It's just sitting there in the servers, locked, unseen, and unused, isn't that driving you crazy?!"
"I'm always crazy, well, not legally of course. They haven't invented a word yet for my condition. But yes... it is beginning to slowly build up and infuriate me that they were so hype and complaining and demanding that we get this expansion out already... and now that we have it out... No one is even TRYING to complete all the raids!"
"Maybe you overdid it on the number of raids?" Gabby suggested.
"NO SUCH THING!" Tirek and Discord amazingly agreed on something.
"AND IF I CATCH ONE MORE TIED-DYE SHIRT IN THIS OFFICE YOU'RE OUT OF MY WILL!... Hello Discord."
"Hi Chryssy... "
Session 84.20 Alex Warlorn
"Uh... Pinkie Pie... what's this new video game you brought from the human world?" Twilight asked unsure looking
"Cat Girl Without Salad!" Pinkie Pie. "THIS GAME JUST SPEAKS TO ME! It's like it was made by me, for me, of me!"
"... I'm not going to say 'you have to be making that up' because I know how that always goes... but that last part does not make sense!"
"Oh yes it does! FUNTAZMICAL!"
"THAT ISN'T A WORD!"
"Kebako uses it!"
"Who?!"
"My new hero!" Pinkie Pie pointed to the ... pink, cat girl, in space outfit, crossing between a school uniform and a mega-pony outfit...
"Just because a video game character uses a word doesn't make it word! And if she's a cat girl, why does she have a devil tail?! THAT MAKES NO SENSE!"
"OH! OH! But it's really fun! See~! And the main character, I've finally found a protagonist who thinks like I do!"
"... I'm not sure any world is ready for this..."
"And she gets power ups with different video games! She shoots little jumping men! And then uses role playing game moves in a shooter! She is my new inspiration!"
"... Somepony HAD to be spying on you when they made this game!"
Nope, not making this up!
https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/VideoGame/CatGirlWithoutSalad
Session 84.21 Mtangalion
Scruff peered through the gap in a crumbling stone wall, boosted up by Chancellor Jim, Rover, and even Trixie, grudgingly. “Well? Can you see the exit? Hurry up and say! You’re very heavy for the Adorable and Fluffy Trixie to hold up!”
“Heavy for you!?” grunted Rover, at the bottom of the puppy ladder.
Scruff’s tail started wagging, bopping Trixie’s snout. “I see two flashing arrows AND a neon exit sign! Hah, we dogs found it first!”
“Okay!” yipped Jim. “Everydog down, and put your forepaws together.” The other puppies blinked at him in confusion, but shrugged and obeyed. “Focus on earth magic! Since we only have the magical potency of puppies right now, we’re too weak by ourselves, but if we pool our magic, we can break this wall!”
Trixie gasped. “You can do that? I mean… of course Trixie knew. She was just about to suggest it, in fact!”
“Why you!” Rover lifted a paw to cuff her, but Jim glared, shaking his head. “Ugh, okay… fine.” They all focused, and the wall vibrated and grew more cracks, but it didn’t fall down.
So of course, that was when the wolf puppies caught up to them, carrying water balloons.
Pavel grinned toothily. “Hah! Time for payback, for paying us back for paying you back for paying us back!” He lifted his water balloon to throw…
“No,” said Erik, unexpectedly. He sighed, then padded towards the dogs, and held out his forepaw. “Here, I’ll help.”
The dogs stared at the wolf pup like he’d grown two more heads and called himself Cerberus.
“What?” grumbled Erik. “Erik’s tired and cranky and ready for naptime. Not so good with earth, but every bit counts! You want help or not?”
The dogs kept giving him their suspicious stares, but it was finally Rover who took Erik’s paw. The rock wall shook harder and finally crumbled, letting them pass.
Alisa cackled. “About time you figured it out.” Everypup turned to stare at her, eyes wide. “What? Making enemies do challenge so they work together is super obvious! Biggest cliche ever, Alisa knew right away.”
“Then why didn’t you TELL US?!” barked Trixie.
Alisa smirked. “Because pranks more fun.”
Pavel and Elena glanced at each other, then nodded and started kicking dust all over Alisa.
“Ack!” whined Alisa. “Fool whelps! Alisa will get you, you'll never see her pranks coming!”
Erik barked with laughter. “You might be pup, but you’re getting old and predictable! Bark worse than bite.” He started towards the exit, but the sunbeam in the next room immediately made him sway on his paws, starting to fall asleep.”
Alisa nipped Erik’s tail to startle him awake again. “Not so old that Alisa forgets that final challenge comes in threes!” She looked to Elena. “You remember that thing you’re not supposed to do except for lesson time?”
Elena gasped. “Really, I can do it? It’s not showing off?” Her tail wagged up a storm.
Alisa chuckled. “Silly girl. Here.” She and Elena put their forepaws together, and motes of darkness began to dance around them. The sunbeam magically dimmed, allowing the puppies to pass.
That brought them closer than ever to the exit, but there was still a rushing river in their path. The puppies had seen it before… any pup who fell in would be washed out, back to the start of the game.
“This needs ice,” Erik declared. “Pavel, come help, and don’t freeze self in ice block this time!”
“It was just one time,” muttered Pavel, ears drooping, but he soon cheered up again and put his forepaw on his father’s shoulder. Brilliant blue motes danced, and ice spread across the river, but not enough to make a safe path.
Scruff hesitated, looking at his uncle, and then he approached Pavel and held out his forepaw. “I… I’ll help you!”
Pavel gawked. “Huh? But, dogs don’t have ice magic! All scholars and dogs with different magic left mines to become Diamond Wolves, long ago!”
“Why do you think I wanted to come to this dumb school anyway!?” barked Scruff. “A few dogs still have it, just a few… like me. I have ice, so my earth magic stinks, and I can’t dig fast like others. All the other pups laughed at me. I thought… I could meet creatures who don’t care about that!” He snorted and looked away angrily…
Only to be started when Pavel clasped his paw. “Not saying we’re friends! Pavel’s tired and cranky too, that’s all!” The wolf pup and the dog pup looked at each other and smirked despite themselves… and the combined magic made the surface of the river freeze completely solid with a resounding crack.
Rover scratched his headfur. “So, who wins contest?”
That debate didn’t even get started before the Squirk roared, echoing in the passage right behind them. The pups yip-yip-yipped, scrambling and sliding across the ice bridge and through the exit.
Session 84.22 Ardashir
"Um, Twilight?" Spike looked around the door into Twilight's office as she scored test papers. "We have a problem."
Twilight shuddered as she stood up."Okay... What is it this time?"
"Well," Spike scratched along his spines, producing a sound like scraping metal, "Remember how you told the Diamond Wolf puppies they had to show some of the unique magic of their people like everypony else did?"
"Ye-es..." Twilight said, nervous. "What did they do, imitate some of the other students?"
"It kinds started out like that," Spike looked nervous as Twilight's horn began to sizzle with magic, "But then they wanted to one-up each other, and..."
***
"Hah!" Pavel said, he and Elena removing their pony-suits before the student six. They stood beside the school's swimming pool, the afternoon sun hot on fur and feathers and scales. "That is something ONLY Diamond Wolves can do, not anywolf else!"
"Oh, really?" Silverstream laughed, clutched her sliver from the Transformation Pearl, and concentrated. It flashed and a moment later she swam about the pool in her seapony form. She swam up by Pavel and sprayed him with water. As he shook himself she said, "Hah! You can't do that!"
"No?" Pavel's eyes focused on the pearl. He crouched and leaped, catching it in his paws. "Pavel will show fish-bird-horse!"
"Hey, leggo!" Silverstream rolled through the water with him, and the pearl flashed with its magic. Twice.
***
"So what happened?" Twilight asked as she came out to the pool. She saw several of the Student Six. They were gathered around what looked like Elena -- except Elena stood right beside the new Wolf with light grey fur shading into pale orchid around her muzzle and paws.
"Eeee! I'm a wolf! I have paws! And a great big nose for smelling things! This is great!" Silverstream lifted her head and sniffed. "I can smell so many things! Miss Twilight smells like magic! Smolder smells like greed and anger! And Ponyville smells like --" Her eyes bulged and she gagged, looking green.
"Huh," Spike said. "I thought AJ said she was gonna spread the fertilizer on her fields today."
Twilight just rolled her eyes. "Students, where is Pavel?"
As one they pointed at the pool. It was turn for Twilight's eyes to bulge as she saw a large shape, big as an adult sea pony, moving under the water. It swam down by her and lifted its lupine head on a long muscular neck.
"Pavel is Sea Wolf now!" He barked. "Have to change back!" He grinned and dove deep before diving out of the pool and back down, splashing everypony. "Eventually."
"At least the worst for this day has happened," a dripping Twilight grumbled.
And with a flutter of wings Princess Skystar dropped down beside her.
"Hi, Twilight! Mom sent me here to find out how Slverstream is doing, and --" She caught sight of the transformed and adult-size Pavel, blinked, and dove into the pool, transforming as she went. "And hello, handsome," she said, face to face with the confused Wolf, her smile more of a leer. "New in the ocean? Need someone to play hide-and-seek in the coral with?"
Twilight just groaned as she thought about all the new letters she'd be writing.
Session 84.23 Alex Warlorn
Princess Twilight sighed, "Didn't I ask you NOT to use the transformation pearl while at the school because it was seen as offensive to the merpony students and would only stir the pot?"
Silverstream said, "Oh I was falling back on the sacred hippogriff tradition... ignore a problem and wait for it go away..."
"Great! Now the DIAMOND DOGS want to invade the ocean?!" Came an angry shout from the pool.
"They're in Merpony-face!"
"I want to go back to table top game antics with my friends now." Twilight sighed.
Session 84.24 Kendell2
Twilight blinked, finding themselves in the Interdimensional Game Room again. She sighed. "Okay, Discord, what is it THIS time?"
Discord suddenly appeared. "Oh come on, now, Twilight, last two times were fun!"
"Fair enough, but you're always doing SOMETHING when we come here."
"Well you see, I looked at the calendar and noticed this month was the start of the second generation of our little franchise...well, not second generation, they didn't get a show, but the second show," Discord explained, holding up a calendar.
Pinkie Pie pulled out a calendar and checked. "He's right!"
"So I decided this called for a CROSSOVER!" said Discord, snapping his fingers and opening a door, then, opening it.
A group of seven teenaged ponies emerged from a door. One was pink with a yellow mane, her cutie Mark a yellow star. Another was white with a pink mane, her cutie mark a heart surrounded by smaller hearts, another reminded them of Bon bon with some differences, another light blue with an orange mane, her cutie mark a not book with a blue pen. The next one was purple with a different shade of purple for her mane, her Cutie Mark a four leaf clover. Then was a peach colored teen with a pink mane and tail, cutie mark a patch of fabric. The last was pink furred with a blue mane and tail, Cutie Mark a microphone.
"Where are we?" asked the yellow one, looking around.
"I don't know, but I want to check it out!" said the peach colored one.
"Oh, you don't think we've been kidnapped, do you?" asked the purple one.
"I prefer the term 'borrowed'," said Discord.
The seven looked at him for a few moments with wide eyes...and mostly screamed and ran while the peach one just started in amazement. "Cool!"
The other six ran off in one direction, then came back around from the other side, ran a different direction and in turn came back around from the other side.
The mane six and Starlight yelled as they six ran into them and tumbled head over hooves.
"Oops, sorry..." muttered the purple one.
"Thank goodness! Adults!" said the light blue one. "Help! There's a crazy thing and we don't know where we are!"
Discord gave an annoyed sigh. "You're in the interdimensional game room! And before any of you worry about your 'parents' being worried: one, I don't care. And two, you know those stories were you go on a huge adventure then return and it's only been like two minutes?"
The peach teen nodded. "Yeah."
"This is one of those! You're not in danger, you're just here to play table top games with my friends over there. You're safe! I swear upon the Terrifying Embodiment of the End of Time that might or might not be my mother depending on the canon of this universe!" Discord said. "Any other questions?"
The mare looked him over. "...Are you an alien who's abducted us?"
"Kind of. If your definition of alien is 'being from another dimension," the Draconequus replied. He snapped his fingers and the groups were suddenly back sorted properly and standing face to face.
The light blue one looked around in complete bewilderment. "What just happened?!"
"I teleported you," Discord said.
"But that's impossible!"
"Now, you haven't met me, but nothing is impossible for me!...Except tanking friendship powered rainbows, but that's neither here nor there! And is it really that weird? Your friend here's Weirdness Magnetism is off the charts!" said the Draconequus proudly. then holding a 'Weirdness Magnetism' Detector next to the peach colored pony, which went wild. "Mane Six, meet Tales Seven! Stars of this show meet stars of the past show! Now enjoy yourself! Next month is the anniversary of G1 and you'll get to meet Megan! See you when you're done! Arrivederci!" he said, suddenly on a unicycle at which point he rolled backwards and fell off the 'edge' of the room into nothing, but somehow causing a loud crash with the sound of a cat yowling as he vanished.
"MY CABBAGES!" screamed a distressed voice from nowhere.
"...Bright Eyes, you're hyperventilating..." the peach colored mare said, looking to the light blue one. "No reason to panic!"
"We've been kidnapped by a crazy...thing and left in a dark room! This seems like a completely rational time to panic!"
Twilight put a hoof on her shoulder. "Take a deep breath..." she said, doing her breathing exercise. The teen copied her. "Then out..." she said, doing the other half, the girl following suit. "Better?"
"Y-Yeah...thanks..."
"You're welcome. Your friend is right, you're safe, Discord will send you home after...whatever game he's playing is finished, if he doesn't, Fluttershy will get on him until he does, I promise," said Twilight. "Okay?"
"I-I guess..." said Bright Eyes...before her eyes followed up Twilight's face to her horn...then down her back to her wings. "...What are you?"
"I'm an Alicorn..."
The peach mare's eyes widened. "D-Do those wings work?"
Twilight spread them and hovered. "Yes, why?"
"Flying magic ponies! See! I told you they existed!"
Bright Eyes and the yellow one promptly fainted.
"...This will be a long day..." said Twilight with a sigh.
Session 84.25 Alex Warlorn (SPOILERS FOR THE EPISODE 'THE WASHOUTS!')
Pinkie Pie was playing 'Cat Girl Without Salad' with her personal mod (the pony galaxy), when Rainbow Dash flew in through her window.
"Pinkie Pie! It's all gone crazy! I saw Lightning Dust down the street, and she smiled and waved at me, and when I warned Twilight Lightning Dust was in town, she just shrugged it off, saying she hoped we had fun! Please tell me you remember and she didn't use her evil mind control magic on you too!"
Pinkie Pie turned off her game and hugged Rainbow Dash. "Oh Dashie, there is no evil mind control magic, you're just remembering how things went in the heart world. So you see, Dashie, since in this universe, you and Lightning Dust making up after she got demoted actually happened. So you had no reason to become enemies. So those events with her at the helm would have made no sense."
"Huh?! So you're saying I just DREAMED all that?!" Rainbow Dash exasperated.
"Oh no no no, those events still happened, but Wind Rider was leader of the Wash-Outs instead. Since having Lightning Dust turn evil when that scene between you two happening wouldn't make sense, since the most nasty ex-Wonderbolt you know was slipped into her spot in her place by the fates."
Session 84.26 Alex Warlorn
"So, Princess Wavedancer," Starlight Glimmer began. "Please tell me why you're feeling down here at Friendship Academy."
"Half the time it's like I don't exist!" The merpony said. "Every time I try to say or do anything, one of those mutts seems to jump right into the spot light instead!"
"It's not polite to call them 'mutts' dear, it doesn't show respect, and respect is the first step to understanding."
"And the other half of the time, I have students asking me, 'why don't you just turn into a hippogriff?' AGH! I have to explain them, over and over and over! That I'm a MERpony! Not one of those fake water ponies 'seaponies' hippogriff shape change into with their stupid magic pearl pieces! It's just gets to tiring to have to explain to them that I'm not one of them! And the worst part is? They then say 'Oh I'm so sorry to hear that!' Sorry! Like me being me is something WRONG with me! It's bad enough those thieving Hippogriffs are here, but all the rest just look at me IN PITY, like I'm an INFERIOR LIFE FORM! Like I need to 'upgrade' to a amphibian state like those hippogriffs have!"
Starlight started to say "I'm sorry" but thankfully stopped herself just in time. She should go Princess Twilight to ask for help on this... but she HAD been made counselor (it felt like everypony in Equestria was getting a job at or becoming related to this school somehow), and she had to show that she wasn't just pandering off all the student with troubles onto Twilight. But what was her solution?
Session 84.27 Alex Warlorn
La la la la! Applejack was Mineacrafting all day long! She was doing a solo run of the game with an enchanted comic version.
Applejack had previous gone into a desert cave that proved to be a lot deeper that she ever imagined it would be. Her inventory was completely filled. And her only option was to dig up, well, she nearly got killed by the sand that buried her alive, but she got it, and built a ladder right into the middle of the desert.
AJ chose to build a little cabin. She loved how IN THIS GAME you didn't need to sleep, you could just work forever, never needing to rest, why couldn't life be more like that? She couldn't remember the last time she'd sleep in game!
She built her house next to the exit hole she made, adding a sign, a gate, and some torches.
Then built the house, since sand was all around, she built most of the walls and the entire ceiling completely out of glass! A nice way for her to watch the monsters from the safety of her home. It was fun to watch the monsters wander about in your well lit house where they could never get you! And a glass ceiling was so tricky in real life but so beautiful in Minecraft!
She didn't NEED to build the bed of course, it was just for show really, just it was still worth trekking back to her home base for the wool to make it. What would Rarity call? Fun-Sway?
But as it turned to night, she heard the most terrifying screech she'd ever heard! She wondered if it was an updated version of the Ender Pony's sound. Or maybe the sand zombies? AJ made sure to stare straight ahead just in case! She turned on the sub titles... 'Phantom', weren't those that powerful monsters that you had to CREATE to actually fight? Where was that sound coming from?! It seemed to be coming from every direction but Applejack didn't see them anywhere!
Then she happened to look up, and maybe she pooped in her virtual pants. She was eye to eye with, one, two, three, four, five, SIX, maybe more! Of these giant bat like monsters (or sting rays) with visible bones on their bodies, blank green eyes staring back at her. And then swooping over and over and over down on top of her glass ceiling, as if trying to break in, before flying upwards and repeating the process! And that terrifying screech every time! And their eyes kept being locked on hers!
Applejack watched them all night, just swooping, and screeching. At least she saw to her relief that burst into flames from sunlight, same as any monster... AJ had never been so relieved to see that...
+++
"Oh those," Princess Twilight said the next morning as AJ recounted her experience. "I read about those in the new update. Apparently they're attracted to Insomnia."
"Say wha'?"
"Ponies who haven't slept or respawned in three days. They are more likely to appear and will appear in larger numbers the longer you haven't slept. They're relentless trackers and can dive underwater after somepony if need me and can even track somepony underground. And aren't limited by the monster population cap. Also only spawn if you have nothing or transparent blocks above your head. Like say glass."
AJ stared for a moment. "Dagnabbit!"
(Based on my own experience!)
Session 84.28 Mtangalion
Princess Twilight settled in her office chair, took a deep breath, then lit her horn, setting a flurry of things in motion. Her office door closed, magic danced across the computer keyboard, typing her password, and a pair of headphones specially modified for ponies settled over her ears.
She couldn’t help but grin in satisfaction. If there was one good thing about running a gaming academy, as opposed to a traditional school, it was that she was perfectly justified in setting up one of their precious few human computers in her private office and playing the occasional game herself.
She magically nudged the push-to-talk key. “Hey, girls!”
The response was immediate. “Ugh, where have you been, Princess?!” said the voice of the human Rainbow Dash, raspier than usual due to static and unavoidable distortions from the audio compression algorithm… she’d really have to see about improving that with magic one of these days. “We need to be running those raids in the new World of Horsecraft expansion and getting that awesome new loot, like, yesterday!”
Princess Twilight cleared her throat. “Rainbow, you know there’s still a lot of preparations to make. I made…”
Rainbow groaned. “You made a list. Heh, of course you made a list. Our Twilight did.”
Princess Twilight’s ears flicked forward. “She did? Let me see!” She checked the pinned messages in the (Elements of Harmony) guild forum and started reading. “This is really good, actually. Incredibly well organized.” She hesitated… did this count as patting herself on the back? “Anyway, she’s mostly reached the same conclusions as myself. The raid team needs to be better geared through dungeons and have more key professions levelled, especially…”
“Dungeon runs, great!” shouted Rainbow, pouncing on that. “Actually doing something! Hurry up and log in, and we’ll carry your character through some mythic dungeons right now!”
Princess Twilight winced. “That’s very generous, and I’d love to take you up on that offer, but…”
“Whaaaat!?” shouted Rainbow, when she saw Real Princess in the guild list in game. “Oh, come on! You haven’t even levelled your character to the new max level yet?!”
Out of nowhere, the whole school lurched to one side, then started groaning, shaking back and forth. While things slid off her shelves and papers flew everywhere, a dragon mail message appeared in a ball of flame and dropped onto Twilight’s head. “Help!” it read. “Discord turned everyone into yaks!”
Twilight slapped a hoof down on the push-to-talk key with a deadpan expression. “Gee, Rainbow, I wonder why.”