//------------------------------//
// S7 E23: Secrets and Pies (What If?) 
// Story: My Little Pony Friendship is Magic What If?: Volume 7 
// by SuperPinkBrony12 
//------------------------------//

For the first time in the entire history of his long existence, Discord was facing down an experience he had never encountered before: Boredom. The spirit let out a yawn as he surveyed the usual chaos of his house in his own dimension. Stairs leading to nowhere, upside down furniture, dishes in need of dirtying, you name it.

But for a spirit that thrived on chaos all of this was nothing new, he'd long since gotten used to it. And he complained  about it even though he knew there was no one around to hear him do so. "My word, it's far too quiet around these parts. I can actually hear myself think," The spirit said aloud. "It's been almost three months now since I nearly lost my powers for good and Pinkie Pie came and rearranged everything. I should be able to do so much more now, instead of just sitting here and twiddling my thumbs or talking to myself."

"Hey!" Another version of Discord retorted. "I'm right here you know! I don't appreciate being talked to like I don't exist!"

"Oh for goodness sake, why do you always hang around?!" The first Discord snapped back and made the other version of him disappear in a flash of light. Then he yawned again. "Seriously though, it's getting old just having myself to mess around with. Even the mail pony no longer gets lost trying to send mail to me. What does a spirit have to do to have a little bit of fun?"

But as he went about doing his usual chaotic things to liven up his house, the spirit thought out loud to himself. "The trouble is, it's not like I can just go ahead and mess with ponies for the heck of it all. I'm one of the..." He paused and gagged briefly. "'Good guys' now. Why I even have the medal to prove it. Really tied the room together it did," His eyes rolled all the way into the back of his head and gazed upon his Equestrian pink heart that rested in its case, as gleaming and polished as it was the day he'd received it. "But there must be some way I can still cause a little bit of... 'good natured' chaos. Something that'll give my friends something to talk about. But what? And how?"

Just then there came the sound of a crash, almost like something thudding into the front door. "Oh, is it mail time already?" Discord pondered to himself. "I really must get a watch or something to keep better track of the time."

Making his way to the front door, Discord opened it and the familiar form of the mail pony sprawled out on his living room floor. "H-here's your mail, M-Mr. Discord, sir," The stallion greeted. "S-sorry 'bout the door."

"Oh you couldn't help it, that last turn is quite the doozy after all," Discord replied as he helped the mail pony to his hooves. He quickly scooped up the mail sack and sorted out his letters, then he returned the remaining ones to the sack and placed it on the stallion's back, offering him a pile of bits. "Here, keep the change. You need it more than I do, trust me."

"A-are you sure?" The mail stallion stuttered.

"Just go ahead and go, I wouldn't want to hold you up on your more important deliveries," Discord shooed the mail pony away. "If you wanna stop by and chat after your shift... well, you just let me know. Take care now," After sending the mail pony on his way, Discord shut the door of his house and snapped his talons as he sat in one of his upside down tables to sort out his mail. A few envelopes passed by him uneventfully, before his eyes suddenly fell upon a flyer for Sugarcube Corner. At that the spirit's eyes lit up! "Ooh! Why didn't I think of it before?!" He commented. "You're a genius, Discord! There's only one thing to do! Pinkie Pie and the Cakes will surely thank me for this!" And his chaotic mind began to scheme.



Pinkie Pie was humming a cheerful little tune to herself as several balloons lifted her into the sky. She found it quite odd that Rainbow Dash would place an order for several pies, especially ones with rainbow colored crusting. Come to think of it, there had been a lot of strange and unusual orders for pies lately.

But pies were pies regardless of who ordered them, and Pinkie was never one to deny someone a pie, regardless of who they were.

Touching down lightly on the grounds of Wonderbolts Academy, Pinkie carefully removed the pie from its box and clutched it firmly in her hooves. She paused at the edge of the runway, her blue eyes scanning left and right to ensure there were no oncoming Wonderbolts. When the party pony was sure the coast was clear, she sprinted across the runway with the rainbow crusted pie in tow.

Rainbow Dash had just finished changing out of her flight suit in the academy locker rooms when she found herself nose to nose with the cheerful face of Pinkie Pie. "Hey, Pinkie Pie," She innocently greeted, as though completely unaware of the reason for her friend's visit. "If you're here to cheer me on at practice, you're a little late, we just wrapped up for the day."

"Oh I know all about that, Dashie," Pinkie replied in a chipper tone of voice. "I know your practice routines like the back of my hoof. I'm just here to deliver the pie you ordered. And how fitting, it's your one hundred and sixty nine thousandth, four hundredth and seventy third practice since becoming a Wonderbolt to boot! Pretty soon I'm gonna have to start planning something for your one hundred and seventy thousandth practice, I'm thinking maybe a cake."

But Rainbow scratched her head in confusion and looked at her party planning friend with the most perplexed look on her face. "What are you talking about, Pinkie? I didn't order any pie."

"What do you mean? Oh, I get it!" Pinkie giggled. "Nice try, Rainbow, but it's not opposite day! That's not until next week, silly."

"Pinkie, I'm being serious! I didn't order any pie," Rainbow protested. "I'm not even that crazy for pie if I'm being honest. I mean yeah, every now and then I'll help myself to one if I'm in the mood, but I'm not much of a pie mare. I kind of prefer cakes and cupcakes," Then she suggested. "Maybe you got the order mixed up or something, that pie's probably for another Wonderbolt. You know how much Soarin likes pie."

The pink party pony carefully set the pie down on a nearby bench and pulled out the order receipt, she scanned it and re-scanned it carefully, checking for any signs of smudging or bunched together letters. There were none. "No, it specifically says your name, Rainbow Dash."

"Well I don't know what to tell you, Pinkie," The young Wonderbolt replied. "All I know is, I didn't order that pie. I've been at the academy all week, how could I have sent that order?"

"Well the receipt did list Wonderbolts Academy on the sending address," Pinkie explained. "But the one who placed the order never came in, they just sent the request by mail. And you know Sugarcube Corner is the only bakery in town right now. It's the only place to go to satisfy your sweet tooth."

Rainbow just shrugged her shoulders. "I wish I had time to help you on this, Pinkie, but it's almost meal time. Thunderlane's cooking today, and you know his cooking is second to none. One of these days I need to ask him if he'll give me lessons. See you later." She zoomed away in a blur of motion a second later.

Pinkie just sighed. "Oh well, whoever ordered that pie must've gotten the wrong address or something. They have been ordering a lot of different pies for different locations lately. At this rate, the Cakes are gonna have to start an express delivery service."

But when the party pony turned back to the bench, she saw that the pie was gone! Pie tin and everything had vanished in the blink of an eye, and there was not a single crumb to be seen anywhere!

"A pie snatcher!" Pinkie thought to herself! "Someone's playing a very unfunny prank around here, sending me on a wild pie chase and then snatching the pie before I can give it to the right pony. Well whoever it is is gonna be sorry!" She dashed away in the blink of an eye, and returned a moment later dressed up in the same detective hat and bubble pipe she'd worn when investigating the mysterious devouring of desserts on the Friendship Express.

"Mark my words, pie snatcher!" Pinkie said to herself as she took the bubble pipe out of her mouth. "You can run but you can't hide! Detective Pinkie Pie is on the case, and I won't rest until I've cracked this case of your crazy, wild pie chase!"





Sometime later, all of the Wonderbolts were surprised to be called into the main hallway of the compound. And they were even more surprised when Pinkie appeared before them in her detective hat, bubbles blowing out of the pipe in her mouth, while her tail firmly clutched a notepad and a pencil.

"I suppose you're wondering why I called you all here today," Pinkie spoke to the Wonderbolts as she took the pipe out of her mouth. "Well that's because, there's a pie snatcher on the loose! Yes, you heard me, a pie snatcher!"

The Wonderbolts all exchanged various glances of worry, but also confusion. Even Rainbow Dash seemed to be scratching her head.

"Uh, what exactly is a pie snatcher?" Soarin questioned. "Is all of this really necessary? Maybe you just misplaced your pie or something."

Pinkie shook her head at the very notion. "I know for a fact that I set that pie down on a bench in the locker rooms, and didn't touch it again after that. I also know that somepony wanted me to come all this way out here, somepony who specifically sought to distract me by having me give the pie to Rainbow Dash, knowing that she doesn't really care for pie. Somepony in this very academy, I suspect."

"But we were just about to have dinner," Spitfire protested. "All of us were heading to the mess hall, and Thunderlane was in the kitchen."

"Are you absolutely positutely sure about that, Spitfire?" Pinkie questioned the young captain. "Did you conduct a roll call?"

"N-no," Spitfire gulped. "But... I didn't think there was a need for one, I wasn't expecting to be caught up in an investigation."

Soarin gulped as well. "This is bringing back memories of the last time an investigation was being conducted among our ranks. And that was when we nearly kicked Rainbow Dash out for a crime she didn't commit."

Pinkie now eyed Soarin. "What's with the gulp, Soarin? You got something to hide? Rainbow Dash always says you're a sucker for pie," As she glared at the Wonderbolt co-captain she questioned. "How do I know you didn't steal that pie away while I was busy talking to Rainbow? You could've easily swiped it and devoured it, then cleaned off your face before anypony was any the wiser."

"But I didn't even know there'd be a pie here today!" Soarin protested. "Yeah, maybe I'm a bit of a sucker for apple pies.. and pies in general. But I'd never steal a pie that belonged to somepony else, especially when I didn't know there'd be one on academy grounds."

"Oh really? Then where were you right before dinner?" The party pony questioned.

At that Fleetfoot spoke up. "He was with me, we kind of got into an argument. All I did was make one off-hoof comment about his flying."

"I heard the whole thing going down from across the hallway," High Winds nodded in agreement. "And I know Blaze and Surprise heard it too. Normally we don't like to look when our own teammates start quarreling, but we were kind of bored and had nothing better to do."

"And you can ask anypony where I was, and they'll all tell you I was in the kitchen preparing the meal," Thunderlane chimed in. "I wouldn't have stolen any pie, and even if I did I never would've eaten it. No sense in spoiling my appetite."

Pinkie trotted past all the Wonderbolts until she stopped in front of Misty Fly, who seemed to suddenly shrink and shiver like a bug under a microscope. "So it all comes down to you, Misty Fly. You're the only Wonderbolt who hasn't spoken up yet about where you were before dinner. And nopony has said anything about seeing you. So, what's your story?"

"I was... just taking a shower," Misty Fly protested even as her teeth began to chatter. "A full day of training can leave you awfully sweaty. I wanted to rinse off before the line got too crowded, like it always does after practice."

"And can anypony back up that claim?" Pinkie questioned. "You're looking awfully frightened. You sure you don't have something you're trying to hide?"

Misty Fly gulped. "I don't do well under this kind of pressure, I don't like ponies pressing in on me," Then she blurted out. "A-alright, alright, so maybe I did sneak a glance at that pie. I was tempted for a moment, I thought maybe I'd take a bite. But I wanted to wait until after I took my shower, and when I came back the pie was gone. I didn't take it, I swear."

"Ah, so that's where you disappeared to on such short notice," Spitfire realized. "I thought it was odd when I saw you wandering the compound earlier, Misty Fly. But I didn't want to intrude."

"Did you happen to see anypony who maybe shouldn't have been here?" Pinkie questioned Misty Fly. "Anypony at all out of the ordinary?"

"Aside from you, no," Misty Fly protested with a shake of her head. "I swear, it's like that pie just vanished into thin air."

Pinkie giggled. "That's just silly, pies can't just vanish. Somepony or maybe even someone had to have taken it. They probably were just really good at not being seen," She jotted down all the information she'd been given by the Wonderbolts and then smiled. "Well I can safely that not one of you is the pie snatcher, and none of you ordered that pie in the first place. Whoever is behind this diabolic dessert disappearance is still at large, or small, or whatever size they come in."

"Well if you need a lead, Pinkie, I think I have something," Rainbow realized as she put a hoof to her chin. "I seem to remember Scootaloo saying something about a class hamster getting sick the other day. Maybe Cheerilee will know who's behind all of this."

"What a great idea!" The party pony beamed. "I'll be sure to ask her."





And that's just what Pinkie did the next day. As it was a weekend, school was not in session and so Cheerilee didn't have to worry about her usual workload. "Hello, Pinkie Pie," She cheerfully greeted as she finished stacking some books. "What's with the detective outfit? I thought Nightmare Night wasn't for several weeks still."

"It isn't, Cheerilee," Pinkie firmly replied. "Sorry to trouble you like this but there's a pie snatcher on the loose, and he or she must be stopped!"

"Goodness," Cheerilee exclaimed with exaggerated worry. "A pie snatcher? I know the Cakes have been getting mysterious pie orders lately, but I always assumed the pies made it to whoever they were intended for."

Pinkie shook her head. "Not anymore, I'm afraid. And that's why I need your help," Pulling out her notebook the party pony questioned the teacher. "I hear there's been problems with the class hamster lately, care to elaborate?"

The earth pony mare nodded. "It's nothing too serious, thankfully. Dr. Fauna says the little guy should be back on his paw in no time," Then she explained. "I've had to explain to my students not to share their food with the class hamster all the time. Animals can't digest food the same way we ponies can. And a few days ago, somepony thought it would be a good idea to feed a few chunks of pie to Hector. But when I questioned my students they wouldn't say where they got the pie from. I may have to start checking my students lunches though, because I keep seeming to find random pieces of pie all over the school house for some reason."

"And nopony has mentioned anything about the pies at all?" Pinkie asked.

Cheerilee shook her head. "No, nothing. I do know this though, none of them are apple pies, so they can't be coming from Sweet Apple Acres."

"I see," Pinkie commented as she wrote down the information. "Anything else? Anything at all? Even the smallest clue might be helpful."

"Sadly, no," The teacher replied with an unhappy sigh. "Whoever is responsible for the abundance of pies seems to be very good at covering their tracks. And I don't wanna have to make the school a no-pie zone. Sorry I can't be of more help, Pinkie. I'll try to keep a closer eye on things from now on."

"That's alright, Cheerilee," Pinkie replied. "But this mystery keeps getting more and more mysterious by the day. It's a real doozy, even more so than the case of the disappearing desserts that I cracked with Twilight's help."





Deciding it best to think things over again, Pinkie retreated to her party planning cave beneath Sugarcube Corner. Normally she would go there whenever she needed to check up on some files or consult them to plan a party. But today her focus on was finding the pie snatcher, so she tacked her notes and what few pieces of information she had onto a board, and examined it carefully.

"Hm, now that I look more closely, I'm starting to see a picture. But the picture isn't pretty," Pinkie said to herself as she eyed the board again. "This all started with a whole bunch of mysterious orders for mysterious and unusual pies. Then somepony pretended to be Rainbow Dash and ordered a pie, knowing I'd take it to the Wonderbolts Academy. While at the academy the pie goes missing, but none of the Wonderbolts are involved. Rainbow mentions that Scootaloo mentioned the class hamster getting sick, and Cheerilee reveals that her students keep getting pieces of pies. There must be a connection, Gummy."

Gummy just blinked and looked back at Pinkie.

"Pies, Wonderbolts, School," The party pony pondered as she paced back and forth, thinking through the current clues over and over again. "Come on, Pinkie. Think, think, think," Then all of a sudden, like a bolt of lightning a realization seemed to strike her! "That's it! Why didn't I think of it sooner?! The one thing all these clues have in common, they're all connected to Scootaloo!" And then she exclaimed! "Of course, it all makes sense now! She's been ordering pies under different names to keep her parents from finding out, and she's been sneaking pies to give to other ponies! Well, her little secret pie giving spree is about to come to an end."

And with that Pinkie jumped onto a nearby slide and made her way back up to her room. From there she trotted down the steps and out the front door of Sugarcube Corner, prepared to confront Scootaloo and bring this mystery to its proper conclusion.





As she bounced along the path to Scootaloo's house, Pinkie began rehearsing to herself what she would say when she crossed paths with Scootaloo and exposed her pie smuggling scheme.

At last the party pony reached her destination, lightly rapping a hoof against the front door. "This is it! The moment of truth!" She thought to herself.

The door was answered by an earth pony mare of medium build, her coat was a beautiful green in color and it neatly complimented her blonde mane and tail that had been styled up all nice and pretty. Her red eyes matched her cutie mark of a red ribbon perfectly, and she wore a lovely orange scarf around her neck. "Why hello there, Pinkie Pie," The earth pony greeted in a chipper tone of voice. "What brings you here on this day? I know it's not Scootaloo's birthday, I would know if that was the case."

"I need to talk to Scootaloo, it's urgent!" Pinkie explained. "We need to have a little talk about stealing pies and giving them to creatures that can't properly digest them. All the clues point to her."

"Well, Scootaloo isn't here right now I'm afraid," The earth pony answered. "I reckon she and her Crusader friends are off doing what they usually do on a day like this. But do you mind telling me why you think a filly like her is up to no good? I know she has a tendency to get into trouble, but I would think I raised her to be better than a thief."

Just then a sturdy pegasus mare came trotting down from upstairs. Her coat was a lovely cream yellow, not unlike Bon-Bon's. She had a wavy mane and tail in alternate shades of pink and purple, purple eyes, and a cutie mark depicting two purple puffs and two pink balls of yarn. She wore a lovely purple scarf. "What is it, Holiday, my dear? I heard Scootaloo's name be mentioned. What has that filly gotten herself into this time?"

Pinkie huffed and hmphed! "Why, she's poisoned the class hamster and stolen pies of course. And all because she's been trying to cover her tracks so nopony suspects she's the secret pie giver."

Lofty let out a gasp! "Goodness! That is quite serious! But why, pray tell, do you believe Scootaloo would do any of that?"

"I was just about to ask the same thing myself, Lofty," Holiday commented as she looked across to the sturdy pegasus and then back to Pinkie. "I've been teaching Scootaloo the importance of managing your money, and I assure you that if she were spending her money on such things as pies, either Lofty, myself, or her parents would know about it."

At that the pink party pony stumbled back. "But, Rainbow Dash mentioned her when the pie disappeared up at Wonderbolts Academy. And it was rainbow colored."

"And when did that all go down, Pinkie?" Holiday questioned.

"Just yesterday. And I know it can't be Rainbow Dash or any of the Wonderbolts, I questioned every last one of 'em. Not a single one knew about the pie or where it had gone," Pinkie explained. "So that means somepony else had to have ordered the pie and then stolen it when they thought nopony was looking. Who else could have a motive and the opportunity? Scootaloo's been at the academy before."

Lofty shook her head. "I'm afraid it couldn't have been her, Pinkie. Scootaloo was spending all of yesterday up at Rainbow Dash's parents' place. She actually stayed out past her curfew even though I specifically told her not to," A sigh escaped the mare's lips. "Honestly, that filly makes me worry so much it's a miracle I haven't grown a full mane of grey hairs yet."

Holiday giggled. "And you'd look just as beautiful even with grey hair, Lofty."

Just then who should come trotting up on the scene but Scootaloo herself? "Hey Aunt Holiday, hey Auntie Lofty," She greeted, before her eyes happened to notice Pinkie. "Oh, I'm sorry. Were you planning some kind of surprise party for me or something?"

"No, no, no, nothing of the sort, slugger," Lofty replied. "It seems that Pinkie Pie here thought you might be guilty of pie snatching and trying to hide pies by giving them to others. Including the class hamster."

"Now why in Equestria would I ever do something like that?" Scootaloo innocently replied. "I didn't even know the class hamster was sick until Diamond Tiara told me about it. And if I really wanted to give pies to my classmates, I wouldn't need to hide the fact."

At that Pinkie felt all her enthusiasm drain away, and her mane and tail start to deflate ever so slightly. "Guess it's back to square one, with no leads and no clues." She sighed to herself.

"Maybe you should ask Diamond Tiara," Scootaloo suggested to Pinkie. "She was the one who spread the word about the class hamster, she might at least know something about who this pie sender and snatcher really is."

Pinkie perked up at the suggestion. "What a great idea, Scootaloo. If there's anypony who'd have a reason to hide something, it would be her. And even if she's not the thief, she'll surely know a thing or two about who is," Lightly stroking the filly's mane she added. "You'd make a fine assistant detective." And she bounced away without another word.

Scootaloo watched the pink party pony disappear into the distance, and she couldn't help but wonder. "Just what is she on about? I don't see what the big deal is about mysterious pie orders and disappearances. Then again, I've heard of sillier things to investigate," And then she thought. "Which reminds me, I still need to apologize to Ambermoon for the whole Olden Pony incident."





It was quite a hike from Scootaloo's house to the Rich family mansion, but Pinkie bounced along the path and reached her destination in no time at all.

When she knocked a hoof on the mansion's front door a few seconds later, Pinkie was greeted by the sight of Randolph, the trusty butler and housekeeper who'd served the Rich family faithfully for years and years.

The old butler politely bowed his head to his guest. "Ah, Miss. Pie, welcome," He greeted. "To what does the Rich family owe the pleasure?"

"A matter of life and pie, naturally," Pinkie firmly replied. "Is Diamond Tiara home? I need to speak to her at once."

Randolph shook his head. "I'm afraid Mistress Diamond is currently unavailable, attending one of her many private tutoring sessions with Princess Twilight and her student. I do not believe she'll be back anytime soon," Then he suggested. "But if the young mistress' behavior is what you wish to discuss, feel free to come in. I'm certain either Master Filthy or," He paused and tried not to shiver. "Mistress Spoiled would be willing to entertain you for a while. Though if you should chat with Mistress Spoiled, please try not to get her angry again. She'll surely take it out on me, and my paycheck's already been docked five times this year. If not for the smile on Mistress Diamond's face, I'm not sure I'd have a reason to stick around. These old bones have seen more than their fair share of wear and tear I'm afraid."

"Don't worry, Randolph, this won't take long," Pinkie reassured the old butler as she made her way inside. "I just need to ask a few questions. Heck, maybe you could help me out by answering them yourself. They do involve Diamond Tiara after all."

Before Randolph had a chance to speak up and offer his services, a familiar stern and snooty voice called out. "If it involves my daughter I'd best not be kept in the dark. If my Diamond has gotten herself into trouble, I should be the first to know," Before long the familiar upturned snout of Spoiled Rich appeared in the front doorway and her strong, opal eyes gazed deep into Pinkie's. "If you have something you wish to say about my daughter, say it to my face," Then clapping her hooves together, she commanded. "Randolph, why don't you make yourself useful and go make sure my husband hasn't fallen asleep in his study again. This shouldn't take long, and I doubt he would want to be disturbed with such trivial affairs."

"Y-yes ma'am, Mistress Spoiled. I'll get right on that!" Randolph saluted and zipped away without another word. He'd learned long ago that Spoiled was a pony you didn't talk back to or argue with. You were better off just shrugging your shoulders and giving her a wide berth.

Spoiled then led Pinkie to the living room, motioning for her guest to sit down on the fine leather sofa. Neither seemed to be aware that a pair of eyes was watching them from afar, and that the owner of said eyes was thinking to themselves. "This may have worked a little too well. I certainly didn't expect Pinkie to have to cross paths with Spoiled Rich. But what can I do? I don't wanna expose myself just yet, it'd ruin all the fun. And after I worked so hard to set up this little mystery too."





The pair of eyes continued to watch as Spoiled occupied herself with preparing tea for her guest. Even Pinkie was more than a little surprised by this seemingly generous act of hospitality. "Despite what you may think of me from my daughter's many stories, I am a mare of merit and fine taste," Spoiled explained. "Besides, your skills as a party planner are... adequate I suppose. I won't deny that you made my daughter's cute-ceañera a celebration without equal," After a few moments of letting the tea boil and allowing her guest to drink it, the rich mare asked. "Now then, you wished to ask me something about my daughter?"

"Well it's about pies," Pinkie told Spoiled. "Namely the fact that somepony or someone keeps ordering mysterious pies, and then somepony pretended to be Rainbow Dash and sent me on a wild pie chase. Then they swiped said pie at the Wonderbolts Academy while I was distracted. And apparently, somepony's been smuggling pies into school and feeding them to the class hamster to cover their tracks."

Spoiled immediately deduced the line of logic Pinkie was getting at, and her face morphed into a pronounced frown. "So you think my daughter is really no better than a common thief and a scoundrel? Frankly, I'm disappointed and ashamed that you would ever think such a thing, Miss. Pie," With a hmph she declared. "Don't you think I would know if my own daughter was doing such things behind my back? Even before her 'change of heart' I was quite insistent on teaching Diamond the importance of an allowance, and not spending all your money on pointless pursuits. And since she started changing her ways, I've maintained a tight grip on her little purse strings. I assure you, she wouldn't be able to buy even one pie, let alone enough to feed an entire school."

"You sure she hasn't secretly been hoarding all her money?" Pinkie questioned. "She could be saving up her allowance to spend it all at once."

Spoiled shook her head. "I'd still know if she were smuggling pies. I run a tight ship around this house. Not a thing goes on within these walls that I don't know about. So before you go spouting these outlandish accusations, I suggest you gather far more proof beyond wild speculations." She stomped her hoof down in frustration and snorted as steam escaped her nostrils.

The pink party pony stumbled back. "But... I thought..."

"-Well you thought wrong I'm afraid," Spoiled growled. "Now kindly get out of my house! I won't stand here and let you insult my teachings! No one but me has the right to be critical of my daughter, do I make myself clear?!"

With a gulp Pinkie nodded. "Y-yes ma'am, Spoiled. I'm... so sorry to bother you."

The rich mare grumbled. "As you should be. And you call yourself a detective?" She then stood up and motioned for the door, making it clear what she expected of her guest. Pinkie obeyed without hesitation.





"What am I doing wrong?" Pinkie wondered out loud as she trotted through town. "It seems like the more I investigate the more dead ends I turn up. First I thought for sure it was Rainbow Dash, then I was certain Scootaloo was the culprit, but now not even Diamond Tiara could've done it," She paused to look at her reflection in the fountain in the center of town, Spoiled's words still stinging and ringing in her ears. "Am I not good enough? Maybe I'm really not cut out to be a detective after all."

But much to the pink party pony's surprise her reflection suddenly seemed to take on a mind of its own as it looked at her and told her quite firmly. "Don't let the naysayers get you down, Pinkie. Just because you haven't found the culprit yet doesn't mean you can give up."

"But what am I supposed to do? I have no leads, no clues, not even a hunch as to who could've do doned it." Pinkie protested.

Pinkie's reflection just shook her head. "Then perhaps it's time to consider other options. There are plenty of ponies who could help you out. Any of your friends would surely be willing to lend their services if you just asked."

Pinkie gasped as her eyes lit up with a renewed vigor! "Of course! The answer is obvious! All this time I've been trying to solve the mystery on my own, when what I really needed to do was get my friends involved," She beamed happily at her reflection. "Oh, thank you, me! I guess sometimes you just need to look at yourself to find the answers you're seeking."

The reflection just winked and replied. "Glad to be of service, Pinkie Pie. Now you know what you must do."

"Exactly!" Pinkie beamed! "This is a mystery that's far too big for one pony to solve all by herself! I'll go get Twilight, this kind of mystery should be right up her alley!" And without a second's hesitation she bounced away, her sights set firmly on Twilight's castle.

If Pinkie had turned around she have briefly noticed her reflection whisper to itself, "Works every time." before it seemed to vanish into thin air.





With a renewed sense of determination and a newfound spring in her step, Pinkie cheerfully hummed a tune to herself as she excitedly pranced along to Twilight's castle. "This'll be just like old times, even if Twilight and I only solved one mystery together." She thought to herself.

Before long she was at the castle's front door and knocking it rather energetically with a hoof. She could barely contain her excitement and was already rehearsing what she would say to Twilight to recruit her services.

But instead of Twilight, or even Starlight, the door was answered by Spike. "Hey, Pinkie, what's up?" He greeted as he opened the door and let Pinkie inside.

"No time to explain, Spike!" Pinkie eagerly replied! "I need to see Twilight, now! It's urgent!"

"She's busy tutoring Diamond Tiara on friendship, and Starlight's helping her," Spike said in response. "I could pass word along if you'd like, but these tutoring sessions go on for quite a while."

At that Pinkie began to pace back and forth in an impatient manner. "But I need to see her right away, Spike! I really need her help!" And she began to explain! "There's this mystery involving secrets and pies and stuff like that, and I've tried to solve it on my own and I can't, so my reflection told me I need to get my friends involved..."

"-And you figured Twilight was the best option?" Spike guessed. By now he had more or less become an expert on translating what Pinkie was trying to say when she got into one of her fast speaking moods.

The pink party nodded in confirmation. "Yeah, how did you know?"

The little dragon simply replied. "More of a guess, really. But you said your reflection talked to you, correct?"

"Yeah, thought that was kind of weird to be honest. But then, there's a lot of things I do that everyone else thinks is weird." Pinkie confirmed.

"And you said this was all about pies?" Spike added.

"Yesarooni, Spike! And that's why I really need Twilight's help!" Pinkie pleaded. "I've tried to find the answers on my own, but every single time I think I've found a lead, it just loops right back around and leaves me where I started. The only clues I have are the mysterious pie orders, the disappearing pie, and the abundance of pies at school."

At that Spike paused, putting a claw to his chin as he began to ponder. "Wait a minute, Pinkie! Mysterious pie orders and a disappearing pie?"

"Yeah, and everypony I've asked has no clue about either of them. It's like they just happened." The party pony replied.

"And your reflection... What if it wasn't actually your reflection talking to you, but rather someone pretending to be your reflection, in order to put you on the right track?" Spike suggested.

"But, how could that be? Nopony could pose as my reflection!" Pinkie protested.

At that Spike went on to emphasize. "Nopony. Now think for a moment: Who do we know that isn't a pony, and can do things that shouldn't be possible?"

Pinkie and Spike both said at the same time! "Discord!"

Pinkie then stumbled back in surprise! "No way! You think Discord is behind all of this?"

"It would make perfect sense, Pinkie," The little dragon nodded. "The mysterious orders are because nopony truly knows how to get into or out of his dimension, except for Fluttershy and you ever since you accidentally stumbled into it a while back. And only Discord could make a pie vanish into thin air, or cause pies to suddenly appear from not of nowhere."

"But, why would he do such things? And more importantly, how do we tell him to stop doing it?" Pinkie asked.

At that Spike grinned. "It's simple, we go right to the source and confront the very draconequus himself. I've always wanted to see what his house looks like."

"But how are we supposed to get into his dimension? It's not like we can just teleport to there." Pinkie protested.

"You've been there once, Pinkie. And that was when you weren't trying to find it," Spike explained. "It should work the same way again. If we walk around together for a while with no particular goal in mind, eventually we should get to where we need to go."

"I don't know, Spike," Pinkie nervously pondered. "What would Twilight say if she found out about this unauthorized trip? I wouldn't want her to get mad at me."

Spike just waved a claw. "Ah, what Twilight doesn't know won't hurt her. If we get going now, we can probably be back before she even realizes we were gone."





In his own dimension, in the comfort and security of his house, Discord was relaxing on his upside down sofa and complementing himself. "Well, Discord, you certainly know how to create one heck of a mystery. You really haven't lost your chaotic touch."

"You do realize that by putting Pinkie back on the right track, you're encouraging her to come here and look for you, right?" The other Discord protested. "And the mystery isn't quite done yet, you were supposed to start swapping pies from Sweet Apple Acres with those at Sugarcube Corner."

Discord waved a paw. "Oh relax, me, you worry too much. I simply wanted to make sure Pinkie didn't give up the game too early," Then he added. "Besides, if Pinkie was going to accuse me she'd have to find me first. And I've covered my tracks really well, she won't find out in a million years that I'm the mastermind behind this great pie mystery."

But just then there came a rather urgent knock at the front door, and an energetic voice urgently called out. "Discord? I know you're in there. Come out and talk to me, the jig is up."

The other Discord simply said to his counterpart. "You're on your own for this one, my friend. It was nice knowing you, tata." And he disappeared with a snap of his paws.

"Oh you're no fun," Discord sighed. "If only you could be as helpful as my good friend, Fluttershy, or even Twilight Sparkle. She would stick up for me."

Reluctantly, the spirit rose from his upside down sofa and planted his feet firmly on the ground. He then walked across his living room and to the front door, opening it. There stood Pinkie Pie, with Spike seated comfortably and firmly on her back.

The chaos maker did his best to feign ignorance as he adopted the most innocent voice and said. "Oh my, company. How... unexpected."

"You might as well drop the act, Discord," Spike rolled his eyes. "Pinkie knows everything, and so do I."

Discord gulped and swallowed hard. "You mean, she actually..."

"-I do, Discord!" Pinkie said seriously. "Just what kind of stunt are you trying to pull? First you start placing mysterious pie orders to confuse the Cakes. Then you use Rainbow Dash's name to send me on a wild pie chase, only to make the pie disappear. And then you have going all over town and chasing after suspects that aren't actually suspects, all the while I hear about a class hamster getting sick."

"To be fair, that last part was never my intention at all," Discord defended. "Obviously I'd draw the line at letting creatures get sick. Who do you think tipped off Diamond Tiara that something was wrong? I guess I should've done my research on hamsters."

Spike just narrowed his eyes. "So why would you do all of this, Discord? You and I both know you're not crazy about pie. You said it yourself when Big Mac brought that apple pie to our last Guy's Night Ogres and Oubliettes session."

"What?! You don't like pie?! Blasphemy!" Pinkie gasped as she looked at Discord. "How, how, how can you not like pie?!"

Discord threw up his paws in protest. "I never said I don't like pie, I just don't particularly care for it is all. I do occasionally like a slice when I'm really hungry," And then to Pinkie he explained. "But I know how much pie means to you and to the Cakes. I just thought maybe there was a way for us all to get what we wanted. I was feeling bored and I wanted to do something chaotic."

"And you thought a pie mystery was the answer?" Pinkie questioned.

The spirit nodded. "It was all supposed to just be harmless fun. The Cakes would have a ton of business, you'd have a fun mystery to try and solve, and I'd get to watch all the chaos unfold as you traveled all over town. I even made sure to pay the Cakes for the orders, under aliases of course. If they knew it was really me, that would've spoiled all the fun," But then he added. "I never expected you to go so far as to confront Spoiled Rich though, even for a spirit like me a pony like her gives me the creeps."

"Welcome to my world," Spike commented. "I am so glad I don't have a mother like Spoiled."

"Anyway," The chaos maker coughed into a paw. "When that happened, I knew I had to do something to get you back on the right track, Pinkie. Posing as your reflection was the only thing I could think of on such short notice. It seems it worked a little too well though."

"Discord," Pinkie said in a serious tone of voice. "You didn't have to do all of this just because you were bored. There are plenty of other ways to have some good natured, chaotic fun. Heck, if you'd wanted to set up a mystery for me to solve all you had to do was ask, I would've said yes."

"Or you could've let her join Guy's Night like she did when she came back from that trip to Yakyakistan," Spike added. "You saw how well she took to our game."

Discord let out a sigh. "I suppose you have a point," He considered. "All I could think about was what I could do to cause some chaos. Now I guess I have to accept my well deserved slice of humble pie."

At that Pinkie chuckled. "Yeah, all one hundred and twenty slices of it! But don't worry, there'll be plenty of chaos in trying to determine the different flavors."





Sometime later Pinkie and Spike leaped out of a portal, waving goodbye to Discord as he zipped it shut behind them. Then the two friends parted ways, taking notice of the fact that Celestia's sun was beginning to set.

When Spike got back to Twilight's castle, he found not only Twilight but also Starlight waiting for him. And the two of them were looking at him with various glances of worry and concern as they ran up and embraced him.

Twilight was the first to speak up. "There you are, Spike! Where have you been all day?"

"Do you have any idea how worried Twilight and I were about you?" Starlight added. "I don't think I've ever seen Twilight this worked up before."

"Sorry to make you both worry so much," Spike apologized. "But you'll never guess where I went, or what I did."

"Oh really?" Twilight questioned. "By all means, try me. I've heard plenty of stories before."

Spike laughed. "Oh-ho ho it's no story, Twilight. It actually happened. And it all starts with a spirit of chaos who was bored out of his ever loving mind."