From the fields north of Ponyville came a sudden flash that dazed anypony who stared at it. When the odd fog had cleared, a large carnival had appeared decorated with colorful tents and attractions. Ponyville residences stared in confusion at its sudden appearance. Of course, strange things were no strangers to this quaint little town.
Spike was hanging with Dragon Lord Ember, who had decided to come by to visit. They had been enjoying some nice sunbathing when a mysterious carnival appeared. Both stared in confusion as a mysterious brown stallion approached them wearing a large carnival hat decorated in rainbow stripes. His red jacket covered his flanks, hiding away his cutie mark. Tipping his hat, he spoke. “Why hello there, my fine reptile buddies. How would you two like a job?”
The two blinked as Spike stepped forward, skeptical of the stranger. “What’s going on? Who are you?”
“Oh, why I’m Mr. Top Hat, and that over there is my Fair of Wonders.” He gestured to said carnival with a smile.
Ember scoffed, “More like the fair of weirdos.”
Spike snickered while Mr.Top Hat scoffed in return. “Ha ha, good one. But I assure you that my fairground is the best in Equestria. You’ll never know what you’ll find around each corner. I was just wondering if you two wanted gems for helping me with a little task?” Taking off his hat, he reached in and soon pulled out a large bag of gemstones that sparkled in the morning light. “All these can be yours if you help.”
“Like what? Doing some tricks, lame.” Ember rolled her eyes. “You ponies are so strange.”
Spike sighed a bit, feeling a bit embarrassed. “What kind of task?” he asked while eying the mouth-watering gems.
“Oh well, you two just have to perform some entertainment for a few foals. I’m sure the big strong Dragon Lord can handle a crowd of them. Unless you don’t think you are up for it.” The ringmaster smirked.
Ember crossed her claws. “Of course, I can! I can deal with a bunch of whiny foals!”
Spike was a little more nervous, having flashbacks of caring for Flurry Heart and how hard she is to care for. He Imagined a swarm of hundreds of Flurry Hearts and him being buried under a mountain of diapers as they cried and screamed. He shivered. “Uh Ember, I think w-”
Ember growled. “Don’t back out now, Spike. Dragons are way tougher than some snot-nosed foals.”
“But you don’t know anything about foal care.”
Top Hat snickered, slipping his hat back atop his head while adjusting the white mane beneath. “Oh, come now, most of them will probably be preschoolers. Besides, their parents will be there too. Come, come, I’ll show you to your venue.” He turned, gesturing to the pair to follow him into the carnival. “Unless you’re chicken.” With a quick hoof gesture, the ringmaster pulled out a rubber chicken, swinging it around mockingly.
Ember clenched her teeth and scooped Spike up like a football. “Oh, we’ll show you. Those gems are ours.”
“Perfect, follow me.”
The two dragons followed the strange stallion through the lightly crowded fairground. It was big and filled with tents, games, and rides. But nopony was around as the fair had just popped into existence. They eventually came upon a large tent that sat before them with an even more exaggerated cardboard cutout of a pink castle. It even had a ball pit moat with a pink cardboard drawbridge crossing the gap. Numerous flowers decorated the castle walls with a sign hanging above. “Fairy Princess Court.”
Ember gasped in shock. “W-what is this? Some sort of joke?” She crossed her claws again, tapping her foot in annoyance. “I thought this would be something cool.”
Spike looked up once he sat down. “Oh, come on, Ember. It can’t be that bad. We don’t even know what we’re doing yet.”
A puff of smoke left the dragon lord’s snout as she looked at the onslaught of pink in front of her. “He’ll probably make me wear some frilly dress. Dragons don’t do dresses.”
“What about that one Rarity made for you for the Gala?” Spike asked as they headed to the backstage area of the tent.
“That’s different,” Ember grumbled as she scanned the room, seeing the numerous props and toys scattered on various shelves and tables.
Top Hat slipped in between the two while they were distracted and smiled. “Well, all you need to do is keep the foals happy for about an hour, and those gems are yours.” He nudged them forward. “Just pick something to wear and have fun. I need to open my fair!” With that, he slipped out to do other things leaving the two alone.
Ember stared at the curtains dividing the stage area, hearing colts and fillies arriving already. “Fine, maybe there is something cool in here.” She pulled open the nearby wardrobe gagging at seeing various poofy dresses and various princess attire. As she reared back in disgust, she noticed a red heart-shaped gemstone on the bottom of the wardrobe. She leaned down to check it out. ‘Hmm, what’s this?”
Spike leaned down to look and noticed it resembled the fire ruby he had given Rarity all those years ago. Was it his imagination, or was it glowing.?“Wait,” he protested, but it was too late as Ember’s claw wrapped around it. The gemstone glowed brightly before letting out a bright flash. They felt magic surrounding them, becoming dazed for a few seconds.
Ember was the first to yelp as her vision cleared; she sported a bright pink dress that fell down the length of her body. White lacy socks covered her legs, topped with special black shoes. Her jaw dropped as she saw that her claws had gotten painted with bright pink nail polish. The colour clashed with her blue scales making her nails stand out more. “Gah! Get it off!” She shouted, tugging and biting at the attire, cheeks burning.
Spike rubbed his eyes, watching the dragoness struggle with her new apparel. He stifled a laugh, having yet to look at himself. “Oh Ember, you look ridiculous.”
Ember glared hard as she tugged on the leggings. “Oh yeah, at least my wings aren’t fairy-like.”
“What?” Spike turned his head and gasped at the large pair of fairy-like transparent wings glittering in the light. He could also see the blue ball gown draped over him, which upon inspection was also rip-proof. The drake noticed a large tiara on his head in the mirror, but even more embarrassing was the purple lipstick upon his lips. “Gah, so not cool.” His cheeks burn as they both keep struggling and even trying their fire breath to no avail. They both groaned in frustration upon seeing a note on the floor for them.
Ember scooped up the letter and began to read it. “No undressing till the show is over.” She grunted, clenching her teeth more as she tried to rip the clothes some more despite previous attempts failing. Her ear flickered as she heard the foals chanting for the princess and stared back at Spike. “W-well, it seems we have no choice.”
Spike hovered, watching glitter float down whenever he flapped. “Ugh, I look like a girl!” he said, blushed more and whimpered. “B-but yeah, it seems we have to do this. This stuff isn’t coming off.” Hesitating for a moment, the two dragons pulled the curtain back and headed out into the stage, seeing the crowd of foals staring at the two in aww. Many fillies giggled in the crowd and cheered, pointing at the sparkly fairy princess. The dragon lord shifted on her shoes, unsure what to do. She stared down at the young drake for any hint of direction, noticing he now had a sparkly wand in his left claw.
Spike swayed, his wand ears burning as he spoke. “Welcome to the princess ball. I’m uh...Princess Sparkle.” He giggled a little, thinking about how he chose his princessy name, even if it was just Twilight’s last name. With a wave of his wand, he sent waves of magical glitter flying over the audience, the foals up their hooves in the air to catch the sparkles. Ember stood there, shifting and staring at all the eyes on her. Her usual strong persona suddenly fades to shyness while in such a girly attire.
The dragoness blushed. “A-and I’m uh..uh...Ember Dragon Lord.” She squeaked as she tripped on her shoes, inadvertently doing a curtsy, the foals clapping in glee. A few commented on how pretty she is.
Ember squeaked in surprise at how she performed a perfect curtsey by complete accident. “Uh..h-.how am I doing this!?”
Spike fluttered over to Ember. “It's probably just light magic. You’re doing great.”
“I don’t do cute things.” Ember puffed out her cheeks. “What am I supposed to do?” she gulped, feeling nervous for the first time in a while.
“Uh, maybe a dance?” Spike reached out and took her claw, trying to raise her in the air to do some sort of aerial dance since the tent was tall enough. His wings snowed glitter down on foals and parents alike. Both blushed as they performed some slow spinning dance-like moves amusing the little ones with the act.
After the dancing, both Spike and Ember fluttered down and performed curtsies to the audience. When the curtains finally closed, the two dragons collectively sighed in relief. Spike plopped down on his rump with sparkles glittering around him. “Glad that's over.”
Top Hat appeared from behind one of the extra curtains coming over clapping. “Bravo! Excellent, but I need you two still for another performance.”
They can hear stallions setting up sets of giant fake trees and a tower made of cardboard and plaster. Spike looked around. “Uh, is this some sort of play?”
Top Hat took out a bill. “Yes, it’s a tale of Princess Ember snatched by an evil monster. Then a handsome prince with help from you, Spike the Fairy, must defeat him so Ember and the prince can live happily ever after.”
Prince Blueblood appeared in a ridiculous prince costume with oversized white poofy sleeves. “I'm ready for my performance!”
Ember shook her head and replied with disgust. “I am not kissing some pony! No way!”
“Would you prefer to wear your costume all day?” Top Hat smirked, knowing her answer, as Ember shook her head rapidly. “Good, now let’s make the foals happy, shall we?”
The first scene opens with Ember sitting in a field of flowers. Her face flushed as sees little bunnies hopping all over the place. The dragon blinked and asked, “Where did all this come from?”
Before any pony could say anything, the curtains drew back, Ember’s cheeks burning as she saw the audience had gotten larger, Cheerilee and her class all seated near the front. Ember was nervous as she tried thinking of what a princess would do. Then she started to dance around the meadow picking flowers and singing. She was singing! She tried to break out of the spell but could not stop as she sang a beautiful but stupid pony-like song about how cute bunnies are and that spring are here. She had no idea how to stop this strange magic either, like a puppet on strings.
Suddenly from the rafters, Garble came down wearing a giant weird monster costume with thick red arms like those on a mascot outfit. He let out a playful roar. “You’re mine, pretty princess!” Before wrapping the large arms around her giving a bear hug. “Haha, I now have the princess, and soon she shall be my bride, and I shall rule all of Kiddy Land.”
The magic made Ember cry out. “Oh, somepony, help me! I'm too pretty and kind to marry such a beast.”
The monster roared, “Nopony is here to save you! You shall be locked in a tower until the wedding is ready!” He flew off as the curtains closed, ending the scene.
The next scene opens with Blueblood on a fake plaster mountain, singing about how he wants to find a princess. After his musical number, Spike fluttered down from the rafters blushing, glitter falling onto Blueblood. “Uh, hello, I know where a princess is. She is held captive in the tower!” he replied while pointing out into the crowd. The drake found his voice pitched up to sound girly and very hammy in his acting.
Blueblood gasped with exaggerated acting. “Oh, dear! Somepony must free her!”
Spike continued giggling and cooed, “You should. She's in a tower deep in the murky swamp.”
Blueblood stomped about like a toddler and whined. “I can't! My delicate hooves don't do well in swamp water.”
Spike cooed, waving his wand around, sending glitter into Blueblood’s face. “There's more. You will need to brave a desert and then climb atop a volcano!”
Blueblood squeaked in horror, “I can't! My royal hooves would get buried in soot and dirt!”
The fillies giggled as Spike rolled his eyes, knowing that this was just Blueblood being Blueblood. Spike raised his wand and let glitter fall on his hooves. “My magic power keeps the prince's hooves from being harmed. So he can save the princess from the tower.”
The fillies in the crowd began to laugh as prissy pink rubber boots appeared on his hooves with little bows. “It is done. You are now safe to save the princess.”
Blueblood whined. “What about a sword!? I can't slay a monster without a sword!”
Spike rolled his eyes, turning to face the crowd doing a fourth wall break/ “The last prince wasn't this picky.” Spike raised his wand and chanted, “I will present to you a sword that represents the true you.” The crowd laughed again when said sword turned out to be a giant pink rubber mallet like you see for a game of Wake A Mole. “Wow, you’re not having much luck, are you?” he deadpanned.
Blueblood spat it out and whined, “No! I need a real sword, not a stupid toy! If you don't give me what I want, I’ll refuse to go save the princess!”
Spike growled, “Then Prince Blueblood, a curse I shall put on you. Until you save the princess, you’re a princess too!”
Glitter exploded from the prince as his costume rapidly turned into a frilly pink dress with ribbons. He squeaked as he tried to take the dress off, but it resisted enchanted like the dragon's attire. The prince conceded. “Fine, I’ll save the princess!” He took his mallet and ran off backstage.
The crowd burst into laughter as the curtain dropped.
Blueblood runs into the stage as Garble stomps about at the base of the tall tower. A spotlight shined down upon Ember sitting atop the tower and chewing on the scenery with how campy she was. That, and how much of the gems she was eating. Ember fluttered her eyelashes, forced to look as cute as possible. She turned to the audience, “I've been waiting for a few hours, and I missed my tea date with Mr.Bunny. Oh, when will my prince come to save me!”
.
“Roar! I shall marry you soon.” The monster stomps about comically as his ear perks up. “What’s this? I hear somepony coming. They shall face my fury.”
Blueblood jumps out from a bush with his mallet glaring. “Unhand the princess. She’s mine!”
Garble laughed, “haha, what are you wearing, and is that a toy? How cute! Come to play with an older dragon?” The crowd cheered again as they paused to let them do so.
Blueblood angrily walked at Garble. “How dare you insult me! I'm a prince!”
Garble swiped at him and growled, ‘You sure that’s not a princess,” he mocked, leaping at the stallion with the foamy claws. A few kids called out for him to watch out.
Ember swooned in an overdramatic fashion and placed a claw over her eyes. “Oh, I can't watch! My eyes are too delicate to watch such brutality!”
Blueblood got in a few more smacks before the costume suddenly changed from a dragon to a giant bunny rabbit costume. Ember looked down at it and gasped, “Mr. Rabbit! You were behind all of this!” The audience gasped as well.
The rabbit stomped and shouted, “Yes, I would have married you If it weren't for you meddling princesses and that annoying fairy.”
Blueblood blushed. “So uh, what do we do now? I would feel bad for slaying a bunny.”
Mr. Bunny laughed evilly “oh don't you worry. I'm going to flee, and then one day I'll return to defeat you, Blueblood.” He bounced off as Blueblood shrugged and ran up the tower. “I saved you, Ember!”
Ember blushed. “Oh, my hero! Time for your kiss!” Little kids make icky faces while the adults laugh as they stare at each other. Spike the fairy stuck his tongue out.
They give each other a small peck on the nose before suddenly the prince’s dress explodes, turning back into his original costume. He squealed, “See? I am a prince!”
The young foals made faces as the two kissed while the adults just chuckled. Spike the fairy rolled his eyes as the curtain dropped. “Ugh, finally, can we please have our gems now.” He protested, tugging on the outfit as it began to come loose.
Ember quickly ripped her dress off and shouted: “That Top Hat guy better have a mountain of gems, or he's dead.”
Spike picked up the heart gemstone and broke it in half. “Yeah, he is a big jerk using magic on us. Um...want to share?” He blushed, holding out the second half.
Ember takes half, blushing as they eat their gems together. A second passed before a giant bag of gemstones fell from the sky and landed before them. Ember looked inside and smiled. “Alright, let's feast!”
The two dragons began to eat the gems laughing together, neither realizing their performance had been recorded. Top Hat held onto a tape labelled. “Princess Power!” he snickered. “Oh, this is going to be a hit! Luckily, I have a movie theater in this fair of mine. It’s going to be playing all day!”
As the two dragons stumbled out of the stage with bloated tummies, they hadn’t noticed a certain pink pony bounce backstage with an invitation.