Compilation of guest chapters received after Chapter Four's posting.
Guest Chapter #1, by Ally H. Warner:
Everypony started to cry as the Gary Stu and Mary Sue zombie clone ponies started to take over Equestria. Rarity tried to kill one of them with her horn of awesome power but was attacked by a swarm of headparaspritecrabs; who began to devour her mane and eat her cutie mark. Pinkamena Psycho Pie came in bearing her secret weapon.
"CUPCAKES!!!!!!!!111!" she screamed menacingly; as she started to throw cupcake grenades at the ghost zombie ponies. But the cupcakes only turned the Mary Sues into more powerful super fan girls who started to fall for every male pony in Ponyville.
Meanwhile, Eternal Princess Flutter-ice-fire-mountain-tiger-moon-chibi-shark was dancing as poisoned rainbow-colored drops of juice and griffin eggs began to fall from the sky and sparkly pony vampire turtles started to invade; putting everypony into a trance that lasted exactly forty-seven minutes. Twilight Sparkle stood there observing the chaos as the hordes of sparkle ponies flew towards Canterlot and began to rain glitter and fire upon the castle.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" Twilight roared, "NOT ALL OF CANTERLOT!!!"
But it was too late. The castle had been turned into a Hot Topic and became flooded with Good Charlotte and MCR psychotic goth fans. As Luna and Celestia emerged from the mess, Luna inexplicably turned into…a star cupcake monster!
The Cupcake Nightmare Star Monster Creature Pony growled and started to fly towards Sweetie Bell; who was polishing a small bunch of flowers and moon rocks. Sweetie Bell cowered in fear as the creature started to throw giant blobs of banana cake batter and acid celery stalks at the small filly.
"I'm scared of this thing," said Sweetie Bell, "but not in an afraid way. I know now how to stop it!"
She started to throw crystals at the monster which caused it to fall into the Ever Free Forest and get eaten by bunnies.
And then the ponies all melted away into plastic forms.
Guest Chapter #2, by VRipper:
Once upon a time there was only humans! But then the HUUUUGE asshole Trollestia killed all the humans that existed before the dinasours! And the humans was all like!
":("
And Trollestia was all like!
"FFFFFFF- I cannot make trollface cause me am horse! Lol but that ok cause i have magicz and wings!"
And then she flew off into the sunset and burned up!
XXX Later that decade ponies started populating the planet that was known as Earth! (Seriously! What drugs were they on when they came up with this show?!)
The first pony was all like!
"Hurrrrrrr *drool*"
ROFL! All ponies were retarded cause Trollestia forgot to give them brain! And she was all like!
"OLOLOLOLOLOLOL that funny!"
Cause Trollestia cant die from burning cause she is a GOD!!!!
BUT THEN!!! A pony that somehow got a brain from a family of rocks that turned out to not be rocks but just very small gray creatures that couldn't move or talk jumped out from a cloud of copy-paper!
"No! It's not funny! I haz brainz and i challenge you to a duel of milk drinking!"
The most random pony stated as she charged at the white and evil tyrant that was Trollestia!
"GASP! MY ONLY WEAKNESS! HOW DID YOU KNOW!"
Trollestia (Ice-)screamed as she drowned in milk!
"You are white and can use magic! So your only natural weakness must be milk cause milk is white and a fluid that makes your bones stronger!"
THE LOGIC IS TOO POWERFUL TO UNDERSTAND SO THE WORLD BLEW UP!!! XXX 1000 years later in the year of 100XAT (After Trollestia) ponies invented Pinkie Pie! It was their biggest misstake EVER!
"HOLY EFFIN SHIT MAN! PINKIE PIE IS LOOSE AND ANNOYING OUR BRAINS OUT!"
The random scientist guy said gently in his smooth relaxing voice.
THEN!!!!!11111 PINKIE PIE JUMPED AROUND THE CORNER AND STARED AT
HIM!!!
"SOOOO PINK! UKAGJFDVABHKGDAJDTY!!!"
AND HIS HEAD EXPLODED!!!!!!!!
THIS IS THE MOST ACTIONFILLED SHIT YOU'VE EVER READ IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE!!! GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! FEEL THE ADRENALINE RUSH THROUGH YOUR BODY AS YOU FLEX YOUR MUSCLES AND REALIZE THAT THIS STORY MADE YOU A MAN!!!
XXX (Insert calm classical music here)
Now we just have to get to the part where everyone dies. Please sit down and relax as we describe a most wonderful and quiet scenery for you.
The birds were swaying in the wind, the tree's were singing and Fluttershy was not Fluttershy at all anymore cause she had gone through a sex-change and was now named Fluttersteroids.
Twilight was on her way to the market that was only once a millenium when suddendly a rainbow colored cupcake jumped in her way!
"Twilight you must help me! Pinkie made a cupcake out of me!" Thought the small cupcake cause cupcakes dont have mouths to talk with!
"nom!" Said Twilight as she ate the cupcake!
As you read you think to yourself that this story must have been written by a 6 year old or just someone very imature, little do you know that one of those were right and it was not the first one.
BUT THEN... AGAIN! DEATH CAME FLYING DOWN ON FLUTTERICEFREAKFIRE-STARSOLARPLASMAFREEZE-BEAMSHARK (Why make such a long name anyway?!)AND KILLED TWILIGHT WITH AN ICECREAM MADE OUT OF OPTIC LAZERS! "HARR HARR HARR I AM TRIUMPH!" (CAPS LOCK MAKES THIS STORY AWESOME!!!)
BUT THEN!!!!!!! FLUTTERICEFREAKFIRE-STARSOLARPLASMAFREEZE-BEAMSHARK SHOT ALL THOSE THINGS IN IT'S NAME OUT OF IT'S EAR AND KILLED DEATH!!!
OH NOEZ! DOES THIS MEAN THAT NO ONE CAN DIE AND THIS STORY CAN NEVAR END?! F NO! THIS IS MY STORY AND I CAN KILL ANYONE I WANT TO, EVEN IF THEY CAN'T DIE! I SHALL PROVE MY POINT BY KILLING
FLUTTERICEFREAKFIRE-STARSOLARPLASMAFREEZE-BEAMSHARK!
*FLUTTERICEFREAKFIRE-STARSOLARPLASMAFREEZE-BEAMSHARK is unaffected by death*
HOLY SMOKES! I HAVE NO POWER OVER THIS STORY ANYMORE! NOOOOOOOOOOO!
And then everyone died including me cause i tried to kill something that cannot be killed. Did i learn my lesson you ask? Pfft! Hey Derpzilla come over here for a minute!
Guest Chapter #3, by GODOG:
How Equestria was born and how it died
In the year 20394832 on the planet “Equestria” there was fascism. Fascism ran rampant in the streets slaughtering grasshopper and leaving bees in it's wake. Fascism loved what it did, and never wanted to stop. On this ball of rock there was another entity. It was known as Communism.
Communism had the power of influence, he influenced the Lemmings to jump off cliffs in to seas of
grey grass. One day and night Communism and Fascism met. They then raped each other. It was horrible. They both died of aneurysm's. From their corpse emerged the two creatures we know as “Luna” and “Celestia”. They decapitated each other with watermelons for forty days and forty nights, only to discover that they were immortal. After buying copyright to the sun and the moon they decided to create ponies. They took the title of Princess because it sounded really fucking amazing. And for 109 years they ruled without conflict. Then one day, Princess Luna awoke, and she knew who she was! Nightmare Moon. N. M. Not just Luna but Nightmare Moon! And she used her killing data to cause the holocaust and eternal night. Celestia prayed to no god in particular, then Beelzebub and Leviathan appeared before her. She bowed to the unholy prince's and wiped their nonexistent feet with her virgin tears. Beelzebub gave Celestia cancer and left because he's fucking Beelzebub. Leviathan however, sealed the seven archangels of heaven into magical orbs that Celestia used to power the F.S.B. (Fluttericefreakfire-starsolarplasmafreeze-beamshark). The shock was so powerful that it sent Luna to the mother fucking moon. For 1000 years, she was kept alive and tortured by the lack of oxygen and the extreme temperatures. Every waking hour she was attacked by Hunger and Thirstiness. They were really good fighters. Her HATE for ponies grew so massive that it spread to the planet below her, showering the ponies in her hate, like radiation. Meanwhile Celestia, after reviving everyone, recreated the government based off of Oceania from 1984 because she loved that book. After the 1000 years Nightmare Moon came back and was promptly beaten by six of the the archangels reincarnations. They died 6 years later because of Luna's HATE. Unknown to everyone the Antichrist was among them. It took the form of a blond Pegasus with crossed eyes. She was a pretty cool mare, she smoked weeds and wasn't afraid of anything. She revived the archangels because she thought they were cool as well. I personally say think they were totally lame. Except one of the archangels: Rainbow Dash. She created Jimmy Hendrix and that makes her A-OK in my book. Anyway, Luna and Celestia both met in Canterlot. The battle raged for 7 years. The archangels and the Antichrist retreated into the south lands. As they stood from far off, they cried when they saw the smoke of her burning: "Was there ever a city like this?"
They decided that existence needed to be purified. So they summoned the power of Democracy to rain hell fire from the heavens.
Then it went like this:
The buildings tumbled in on themselves
Mothers clutching babies
Picked through the rubble
And pulled out their hair
The skyline was beautiful on fire
All twisted metal stretching upwards
Everything washed in a thin orange haze
I said, "Kiss me, you're beautiful -
These are truly the last days"
You grabbed my metaphorical hand
And we fell into it
Like a Daydream
Or a fever
We woke up one morning, and fell a little further down
For sure it's the valley of death
I open up my wallet
And it's full of Capitalism.