Never the Final Word (Vol. 2)

by FanOfMostEverything


FoME's Tarantiny Request (kits's "Too Busy")

Sunset looked back and forth between the frazzled princess and the creature who looked far too smug about breaking Twilight's arm. She leaned on the door to her apartment, in part because she just wasn't awake enough to deal with this and stand up straight at the same time. "Let me ask you a question, Twilight. When you came walking through the portal, did you notice a sign on top that said 'Used Villain Storage'?"

"Sunset, you know I didn't see any—"

Sunset held up a hand. "Did you notice a sign out on top of the portal that said 'Used Villain Storage'?"

Twilight looked away and knocked her balled-up hands together a few times. "No, I didn't."

Sunset nodded. "You know why you didn't see that sign?"

"Why?"

"Because it's not there, because storing used villains isn't what this universe is for!" Sunset stomped a foot for emphasis.

Twilight bit her lip. "It... kind of is."

"No, that's how lazy ponies who can't solve their own problems use it." Sunset leaned in close and poked Twilight in the ribs. "Are you a lazy pony who can't solve her own problems?"

"Well, with Chrysalis—"

"Are you a lazy pony with no sense of facial hygiene, terrible taste in robes, massive inadequacy issues, and an inability to solve her own problems?"

"Sunset—"

"Are you a pony so hopped up on her self-importance and centuries of kowtowing that she can't even handle another strong personality who doesn't immediately bend the knee?"

Twilight glanced at Chrysalis, who seemed to be enjoying this far too much. "Can we talk about your issues with Celestia some other—?"

"Tartarus is right. Freaking. There, Twilight. This is Cerberus's problem, not mine." With that, Sunset slammed the door in the others' faces.

After a few moments, Chrysalis broke the silence. "Can I stay here? I like her."

"Shut up, Chrysalis."