//------------------------------// // 4. Luncheon With a Princess // Story: Written in the Stars // by Carapace //------------------------------// Wump-wumpf-creak! Wump-wumpf-creak! “Wahoo!” “These beds are awesome!” Rarity’s ears twitched, her lips pressed into a thin line. She blew out an angry breath through her nose, glaring at her own reflection in the mirror. A brush hovered near her mane, held aloft by a sapphire glow and frozen in mid stroke. They’d been jabbering and chattering like a pair of excited chipmunks since the moment two Royal Guardstallions knocked at their hotel room door just a couple short hours before. With a brief salute, the ranking stallion informed them that they’d been given orders to assist them in moving to their new accommodations. Provided by Her Highness, Princess Twilight Sparkle, with the blessings and support of Her Majesty, Princess Celestia. That alone had been enough to make Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle turn and stare in slack-jawed awe, waiting for an explanation. A state which, mercifully, had persisted the duration of the journey from the hotel to Canterlot Castle, as if they expected it all to be part of some elaborate ruse that ended with the three of them simply escorted to the train station by a pair of Royal Guard lookalikes. When Princess Celestia’s longtime seneschal, Raven, greeted Rarity by name and informed them that their room had been prepared, the questions came in earnest, her sister’s squeaky babbling and Scootaloo’s raspy whispers filled her ears. A never ending stream that left her no reasonable chance for reply until Raven showed them into the room. Form there, all interest in questioning had gone by the wayside in favor of every elder sibling’s least favorite portion of any trip: exploration and play. Exploration through a suite in the heart of Canterlot Castle, and play with things that most certainly didn’t belong to them. Wump-wumpf-creak! Wump-wumpf-creak! Her right eye began to develop a twitch. “If I have to tell those two one more time,” she hissed as though it would reach the fillies’ ears through the bathroom walls and door, “I’m going to scream. And then I’ll have to explain to Princess Twilight why she needs to bail mare-in-waiting out of prison.” Wump-wumpf-creak! Wump-wumpf-creak! That did it! Rarity grumbled a few choice words under her breath and jammed her brush back into her toiletries bag. Then she turned sharp on her hooves, giving her tail an irritable flick that snapped at the air before storming out of the bathroom. Her mane coat bristled, she fixed the pair with a venomous glare that made them both freeze in mid bounce and fall back onto the bed they were sharing with a dull wumpf and squeak of the springs. If she weren’t so annoyed, she might have taken a moment to appreciate her glare’s effects. She sucked in a breath through her nose. “You two,” Rarity ground out through gritted teeth, “are going to stop fooling around this instant, or I swear the first thing I do when we get home is march down to Cheerilee’s house and demand she give both of you double homework for the next year!” With a pair of strangled squeaks, the fillies leapt off the bed as if it had burst into flames. Then they defaulted to their tried and true defense—matching pouts and big watery eyes. “Please don’t tell Miss Cheerilee!” Scootaloo cried, her wings flared out and ready to buzz for an escape route. “She’ll give us math homework ‘till my feathers turn gray!” Her sister, however, favored the more dramatic route, much like herself. Sweetie Belle dashed forward and latched onto Rarity’s right foreleg, her hooves locked around the knee. “We won’t bounce again! Honest!” she warbled. Her lip quivered ever so slightly, just enough to make Rarity’s gaze falter just bit. Rarity bit her lip and glanced over at a painting of Mount Canterhorn in midsummer. A show of weakness. A fatal mistake every big sister knew to avoid. All the room Sweetie needed. Lowering her voice, she pressed her cheek against Rarity’s knee and rubbed against it. Her coat was as soft as a newborn chick’s fluff. She mumbled, “We were just excited because it’s such a nice room. We weren’t going to break anything.” A low groan rolled from the back of Rarity’s throat. She closed her eyes and sighed, fighting against her own mind’s eye as it conjured up an image of herself as a filly, caught red-hooved by her parents next to a smoking, sputtering sewing machine and a mess of fabric strewn about the room. One of her very first attempts to make a costume for the school play. Her ears still burned at the memory of that particular scolding. Sewing machines weren’t cheap, especially for their parents at that time. The harvest hadn’t been as strong. With a heavy sigh, Rarity patted Sweetie Belle’s head with her free hoof. “I know, Sweetie,” she said. “And I know you might not mean to break anything, but that’s why they’re called accidents. I think we all can admit that you two have a rather sordid history with such things, can’t we?” Streaks of pink bloomed across their little faces. Scootaloo looked down at her hooves and scuffed them against the tile floor, her ears pinned flat. Sweetie was simply content to bury her face in Rarity’s kneee again. Though not quite before Rarity caught a glimpse of a smile. Aha! And lo, the mischievous fillies realize themselves. A knowing smirk tugged at her lips. Game, set, and match, the elder sibling claimed victory once again. Rarity lit her horn and gently disentangled Sweetie’s limbs from her leg, then she levitated her sister off the ground to hover just a few short inches from her face. “I’m not saying you girls can’t have fun, Sweetie. But we’re in Canterlot Castle, in a room provided by Princess Twilight, no less.” She fixed her sister with a meaningful look before floating her over to rest beside Scootaloo so she could speak to them both at once. “I should think it best that we not spend our first night in such accommodations explaining how we broke castle property. Wouldn’t you agree?” The color drained from their faces. “Yup!” they squeaked. “Precisely my point.” Giving them a small smile, she released Sweetie from her levitation spell and cantered over to stand with them. “Now, with that in mind, I just want you to behave for a couple of days, girls. You may ask questions and play, but don’t go running off without me or start bouncing off the walls.” “So …” Sweetie began. “No Crusading?” Rarity gave a bell-like laugh. Then stopped to glare at both of them. “That word,” she hissed, “does not enter your heads again until we are back in Ponyville proper. Are we clear?” They sat down so fast and hard their rumps thudded against the floor. “Crystal!” they replied in unison. Excellent. There was one dilemma out of the way. Still, it left another: the inevitable questioning. True to form, Sweetie recovered first. Her fearful tremble and wide-eyed stare faded away. In its place, her lips curved into a contemplative frown, her nose scrunched up in a way that would make adults the world over croon and whisper about what an adorable little filly she was. Rarity, however, felt an odd shiver travel down her spine. A need to flick her ears and tail joined it when she noticed the way her sister’s brows knitted together as if she were considering a math problem. For all her complaints about schoolwork, Sweetie Belle could be quite adept at problem solving. Just not the sort that would appear on Cheerilee’s homework sheets. “Come to think of it,” she said slowly, looking down at the floor as though it held all the answers, “you never explained why we have to stay in Canterlot for two extra days.” “Yeah!” Scootaloo chipped in. After a second thought, she added, “Not that we mind you sending a letter to Miss Cheerilee that we wouldn’t be back for the rest of the week, but you still never told us why. Please don’t send us back early. We’re missing a math test and I need the weekend to study.” Again, Rarity flicked an ear. She frowned. “And just when is this test you’re missing?” She could almost read “oops” right off of Scootaloo’s face. The pegasus gave a raspy chuckle and smiled. “Today?” “So, when I asked if you two had schoolwork you could be doing on the train ride up or when we settled in for the night and you said no, you were lying to me.” Sweetie raised a hoof. “Actually, I did all my review homework. And I know my multiplication tables.” One out of two, then. Rarity sighed and brought a hoof up to massage the bridge of her nose. That was going make for a fun conversation with Scootaloo’s parents. Perhaps she could schedule a root canal for afterward just to round out her day. “You had best score well on that test, young filly,” she groaned. “Because if I hear anything about poor grades from your parents because of this trip, I promise, you won’t like the consequences.” Satisfied that she made her point, Rarity returned her attention to Sweetie Belle, who still had that look on her little face. Heaving another sigh, she waved a hoof. “Fancy Pants’s contact yielded results. As of now, I have a new job.” “Oh!” Snow white ears perked up. Sweetie gave her powder pink and purple tail a merry swish. “A commission, you mean? For a dress? But why does that mean we’re staying longer? And here?” She waved at the room around her. “Like … how?” Rarity bit back a rebuke for her verbiage. Instead, she shook her head. “Not a dress commission, Sweetie. A job. I’ve taken a new position. An …” How to express it properly? “An unexpected change, yes. But one that may help me in the future.” Her sister’s jade eyes lit up. “How so?” Sweetie pressed. “And you’re still not telling us how it landed us here,” Scootaloo added. “Er …” Rarity offered a nervous smile in turn. If there were ever a way to set the fillies into a tizzy, it was telling them about her new job. Then again, not telling them would do just about the same. Why hadn’t she thought of a better excuse? Maybe something like Fancy setting them up on some surprise castle tour for the week, then spring it on them when they returned home. If only she should be so lucky that such a thing would work. Darling though they were, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo often chose the worst moments to be perceptive. A hoof rapped thrice upon the wood door. Rarity flicked her left ear and let a grin spread across her face. “Hold that though,” she said, shamelessly triumphant to stave off the inquisition just a little while longer. “Coming!” she trilled, trotting over to the door with her head high and a pep in her step that set her curls bouncing. Wrapping the door handle in a shimmering sapphire glow, she tugged it open to reveal a mulberry coated chest. Then her vision tracked up the pony’s neck until she met a familiar face. “Helloooo—P-Princess?” A pair of purple eyes blinked twice. Princess Twilight Sparkle furrowed her brows and tilted her head, her neatly brushed, tricolored mane spilled over her shoulder. “I thought we discussed not calling me by title,” she said, before turning to a burly white unicorn stallion with two-toned blue mane that Rarity hadn’t noticed at first. “I didn’t overlook some obscure rule about that when I told her so, did I?” The stallion chuckled, a light rumble that rolled forth from his chest. “No, Twily. If you gave her permission, she can call you by name.” He cast a playful wink at Rarity, his eyes shimmered like a running river. “Probably surprised you didn’t send for her again.” “Ah! Right.” Twilight’s cheeks colored. She gave a sheepish smile. “Sorry about that, by the way. I don’t mean to set a precedent with that, but Celestia asked me to help her gather a few star charts. Something about a meeting with the wyvern ambassador coming up.” “Nothing too serious,” the stallion said smoothly. Rarity nodded. “Oh, well, that’s good.” Furrowing her brows, she looked the stallion up and down. She’d seen him before. Somewhere. “Pardon me. I don’t believe we’ve been introduced. My name—” “Rarity,” he cut her off with a dazzling smile. “Twily told me about you. It’s nice to meet the mare who gets to join us all in suffering my baby sister’s eccentricities every day.” Twilight aimed a glare at him. “I’m right here, you know. And I can get you in trouble for those remarks now.” His smile only grew. “You could.” “Jerk,” she shot back without malice. Then she turned to face Rarity with a smile. “This is my older brother, Shining Armor. Captain of the Royal Guard, and Princess Cadence’s fiancé.” If her heart leapt any further, Rarity was certain it would jettison forth from her mouth and dance a jig on the floor. The hits just kept coming! “Oh. Um, well! Very nice to meet you, Captain,” she demurred with a little bow of her head. “I’m sure it’ll be a pleasure working for your sister.” He gave another rumbling chuckle. “Just Shining is fine. I’m on my break anyway.” He stole a glance over her shoulder and waggled his ears. “Hiya, kids!” he greeted. “How do you feel about lunch?” Oh. Right. The fillies. Rarity sucked in her lips. She turned slowly, cringing as she found herself met with matching stares and slack-jawed gaping once again. Forcing a smile, she gave a weak laugh. “You work,” Sweetie began. “For Princess Twilight?” Scootaloo finished. Shining Armor burst into laughter. “You didn’t tell them? You had all morning and you didn’t tell them?” he said between breaths. “Oh, this is great! You two are gonna get on just fine!” Rarity heard Twilight groan. “Could we please drop that? Let’s just go for hayburgers. I could eat a cartload.” Yes. Hayburgers. Those would be nice. Big, juicy hayburgers that could easily be crammed into inquisitive little fillies’ mouths to forestall any—wait a moment. A princess eating hayburgers? Surely she wasn’t serious. Twilight had been completely serious. Rarity moved as though in a daze, a prisoner within her own body as she watched the newly crowned Princess Twilight Sparkle chatter away with her brother, then turn to answer any and all questions Scootaloo or Sweetie Belle spouted off, all while standing in line at a Hayburger Shack. First hayburgers. Then a fast food “restaurant” smack dab on the corner of Bridle Lane and Canter Court that was literally called The Hayburger Shack. There was even a playground with a ball pit for the little foals. “I’m in Tartarus,” she mumbled. “I’ve offended the princesses somehow, and I’ve only just awaken. And now I’m in Tartarus.” A tiny hoof prodded her knee. She looked down and was met with a stern glare through jade eyes.  “Rarity!” Sweetie hissed, bobbing her head at the counter. “It’s your turn to order! Stop spacing out!” Ordering. Right. Rarity gave an award cough and rattled off a request for a small order of hayfries, a single, and a cup of water. The food in Canterlot was quite exquisite, but a bit on the heavy side at times. She certainly hadn’t accounted for fast food in her meal plan, either. Indulging royalty, it seemed, was going to ruin her carefully crafted diet. A drawback to be sure. But did it really outweigh the benefits? As Princess Celestia said, employment by the Royal Family would do wonders for a pony, regardless of field. What were a few extra fast food meals here and there? The thought brought a smile back to Rarity’s face, and a pep to her step as she followed Shining and Twilight over to a large table on the far side of the dining room. All five sat down, though Rarity made sure to get eye contact with the fillies and motion that they stay standing until the princess sat. Casual setting or not, some proprieties had to be observed. And, by Celestia’s crown, she would see it done. “So,” Shining began, “how’re you three liking the city so far?” “It’s been really fun!” Scootaloo chirped, wings buzzing merrily. “Fancy Pants and Fleur de Lis showed us around the first couple days! We went to the Wonderbolts’ Canterlot Air Base! And they even let us inside to see some of the old training equipment and uniforms from retired members!” “And a few current ones,” Sweetie put in. Her lips curved into a knowing smirk. “Namely, the one you never shut up about. What’s her name again? Rainbow Bash? Clash? Rash?” Scootaloo fixed her with a scathing glare. “It’s Rainbow Dash, you smart-aleck,” she spat, her nostrils flaring. “How in Equestria can you spout sync—sync—words that mean the same thing—” “Synonyms,” both Sweetie and Twilight supplied. The filly beamed at the newly-minted princess, like a student eager to please her teacher. A look, Rarity noticed, brought a happy fluff of those mulberry feathers. Fitting, she thought, given her interests. “Yeah, those,” Scootaloo said with a nod. “But how come you remember those, but not the name of, like, the best flyer in the world?” Sweetie simply shrugged. “I’unno. Must’ve just slipped my mind or something.” “I tell you about her all the time! We were just talking about her yesterday!” “Were we?” Jade eyes sparkled. She shot a sidelong look in Rarity’s direction and winked. “Silly me.” Oh, dear. Rarity hid a smile behind a sip of water. With a shake of her head, she turned her attention to Shining Armor. “You must be proud, Captain Armor,” she simpered, eager to steer the conversation elsewhere. “I’d imagine it must be quite the feeling to see your sister ascend. And at such a young age, no less.” “Just Shining,” he corrected around a mouthful of hayburger. Once he swallowed, he added, “Yeah, we’re all pretty proud of Twily, Mom and dad have been full on waterworks since the day it happened.” To his left, Twilight snorted. “So were you, mister ‘liquid pride.’” The corner of his mouth twitched. “That so? It’s funny, ‘cause I don’t think mom wailed or hugged me that much when I graduated from the Academy a couple years back.” “Oh, shut up! You’re exaggerating!” she protested. Her ears drooped as the blood rushed into her cheeks and colored them a deep purple. “She did not! She most definitely did not!” “You sure?” Shining’s eyes gleamed. His lips curved into a slow, wicked smirk. “Because I now she did. And I at the house last night when she and dad were looking through the album, and you’ll never guess which pictures we stumbled up—mph!” He was cut off as an ethereal raspberry snapped around his snout, forcing his jaw shut like a muzzle. But his smirk only grew. Twilight’s horn glowed bright, though not nearly as much as the blush spreading down her neck. She pursed her lips, which only served to make her look more adorable than stern. In Rarity’s opinion, at least. “Don’t. You. Dare.” she hissed. With a waggle of his ears and a flash of pink, Shining Armor dispelled the magical muzzle and resumed eating. Though he did start humming a light, happy tune, and aimed a cheeky grin at his seething sister. Twilight muttered something unintelligible under her breath, shaking her head. “Please don’t mind my big brother, he loves to tease me. Even though I’m technically his boss now.” Before he could add a comment, she shot him a warning look. “Anyway,” she ground out, turning back to Rarity again, “I was hoping we might take a little time to get to know each other. Yesterday was …” “Hectic?” Rarity offered. “I was going to say surprising, but hectic also fits nicely.” Rustling her wings, Twilight unwrapped one of her hayburgers—one of three. Three hayburgers for one pony. With three large orders of fries and a “Princess Size” fountain drink, which looked more like a beer mug her father once brought back from Germaneigh. Rarity could almost feel her blood sugar levels rising by proxy. Not to mention her cholesterol. Twilight followed her gaze, fidgeting in her seat. “I have to eat a lot,” she said as if reciting from a text. “Alicorn metabolism is higher than a normal pony’s, so … yeah.” “Oh. I never imagined. Good to know.” With an awkward cough, Rarity opted to nibble on a fry to buy herself a few seconds to think of something else. Anything else. It was time to go fishing. “Well, what sort of things were you looking forward to seeing in Ponyville, Twilight?” Blinking, the princess swallowed a bite of hayburger and licked her lips clean. Any awkwardness between them seemed forgotten in an instant. She hummed, twitching her feathers in thought. “Well, I’ve done a little bit of research on the town itself, namely the founding. So I suppose I’d like to meet the Apple family.” She tilted her head. “Is it true that Smith Apple is still alive?” Rarity tittered. “Call her Granny Smith,” she corrected. “She insists that Ponyville is extended Apple family, and there’s nopony alive who can change that mare’s mind.” At her side, Scootaloo snorted her soda. “Understatement!” she sputtered through choked laughter as Sweetie Belle thumped her back. With a sigh, Rarity floated a small stack of napkins over to the pegasus. “Manners. As I was saying, I’m sure Granny Smith would be happy to meet with you. She still tells stories about the original meetings between the Apple family and Princess Celestia.” “Really?” Mulberry ears perked up. Twilight looked about as if searching for something, frowning when she didn’t find it. Then, her horn flashed, and a small spiral notebook and pencil popped into existence. The pencil danced across the page, jotting down a quick note. “That sounds like something I’ll have to hear for myself. Though it does explain why Celestia is so adamantly against Lord Blueblood’s proposal that tax breaks for farmers be removed to grant more to real estate.” Shining let out a bark of laughter. “I forgot about that one! Old stallion Blue never was the sharpest quill in the well. Hopefully Junior brings a little decency back to the house when he takes charge.” Twilight gave him a tired smile, but didn’t contradict him. Instead, she just carried right on. “Meeting the Apples is a must, then. And organizing things in the library I’ll be staying in. Golden Oaks Library, I believe it’s called. I hear it’s a lovely place.” With another flash of magic, her quill and notebook popped out of view. She grinned and gave a little squeal. “Is it really inside a live oak tree? Like that old fairytale?” Old fairytale? Rarity chewed the inside of her lip in thought. Not one she was familiar with, at least. “Yes, Golden Oak Library is right. It’s a lovely little place, really.” “I’m sure.” “Miss Cheerilee has us borrow books from there for our reports,” Sweetie put in. She took a quick sip of her milkshake, then added, “We actually just had one a couple weeks ago.” “Oh really? How was that?” “Not too bad. I found everything I needed for mine real easily. Got an A on the report, too.” Scootaloo blew a raspberry at her. “That’s ‘cause you read way too much.” “Or,” Sweetie shot back with a sidelong look, “because you don’t read enough. Or do your schoolwork on time. Ever.” “Hey! I do too!” Arching a slender brow, Sweetie nibbled on a fry and asked, “What’s five times nine?” “Five times … hang on.” Her face screwed up, Scootaloo gave her wings an irritated buzz. “Uhhh … thirty? No, wait! Thirty-five!” Sweetie Belle’s smile turned sickly sweet. “Forty-five.” “Whatever,” Scootaloo scoffed. “I’ve got plenty of time to pick it up before the test.” A spark of anger leapt into Rarity’s chest. She eyed the pegasus filly with a stern frown, flicking her tail at the display of such uncaring attitude and blatant disregard for responsibility. And in front of Twilight, no less. Why, she was half a mind to give Scootaloo a good piece of her mind! But, alas, that wouldn’t leave the right impression. Sighing, Rarity resolved to address the issue later. She turned to speak to Twilight again. Only to find both princess and guard captain fixing Scootaloo with rather stern gazes. Shining stole a glance to his sister, then met Rarity’s eye. He gave a barely perceptible nod to Twilight, inclined his brows, then took a bite of his hayburger and settled into his seat as if he were about to take in a show. Twilight furrowed her brows. “You shouldn’t take such a haphazard attitude toward your studies,” she scolded. “Multiplication might seem like silly nonsense when you’re learning it, but it’s actually very important in all walks of life. Paying bills, determining equal shares, sales tax, far too many things to count, really.” “Well, yeah, but …” Scootaloo had the grace to look a bit cowed by her words. “I mean, I’ll study and all. It’s just … we’re not taking the test until Monday.” “Now tell her when the rest of the class is taking the test,” Rarity retorted without even thinking. She promptly sucked in her lips, hiding a laugh as best she could when the little filly turned and fixed her with a look of utter betrayal. Oh, well. In for a bit. Raising her brows, she nodded. “Well?” Biting her lip, Scootaloo glanced at Twilight and gave a nervous laugh when she noticed the princess’s eyebrow slowly arching. “Uh … tomorrow?” Twilight sighed, bringing a hoof up to massage the bridge of her snout. “Rarity?” she asked. “Yes?” “Would you consider it intrusive of me to insist that I take charge of quizzing the fillies until we get to Ponyville? Think of it as repayment for you altering your schedule on such short notice.” Sweetie made a sputtering noise. “But I already know my multiplication tables!” Twilight smiled sweetly. “Then our session should go by very quickly, wouldn’t you say?” Without waiting for response, she turned to Rarity again. “Only if you’ll allow it.” Now, there was an idea! Rarity hummed, grinning at each filly in turn. They met her gaze with wide eyed stares, silently pleading her to spare them. She could almost read promises to behave like perfect little fillies from now until the end of time straight off their foreheads. Unfortunately for them, she had three days with them in Canterlot before this. “Not at all, Twilight. We wouldn’t want their parents to scold them for slacking while on break, after all.” “Quite right.” Smiling brilliantly, Twilight did a happy little shimmy in her seat. “Don’t you girls worry. By the time I’m through with you, that test will be a snap! In fact, we can start now.” She rose, levitating her food and drink. “Rarity, would you mind switching seats with me?” Her decision didn’t even take a second. With a happy little hum, Rarity rose from her seat, taking her food as she trotted around to take Twilight’s former seat by Shining Armor’s side. She made sure to meet the fillies’ eyes and give her brightest smile as Twilight sat down between them and wrapped her mulberry wings around them before launching into a lecture. Those brilliant violet eyes were alight with a sense of vitality and genuine joy. Happy to teach. At Rarity’s side, Shining chuckled. “You two are going to get along just fine. I can already tell.”