Chapter 3: Feline draconian!
I awoke with a “mew”, to the wagon hitting a rock in the road, making the entire cart bump. …Did I just mew? Holy crap that sounded adorable! I’m gonna be addicted to this whole cat-thing soon, aren’t I?
The dream with Morpheus was still clear in my head. Illusions, huh? I guess he was right when he said that I wouldn’t be as strong as a real player. Yes, illusions can be dangerous I know, but the harsh reality is that illusions can’t hurt you physically. Granted I could still do quite some harmful things to the mind, but I believe that’s still a high-tier for me.
“So ehm… How do I do this? Dammit Morph, this is the one thing that I’d love for you to tell me!”
What followed next deserved its own montage. I tried everything! OK, perhaps not everything, but everything from waving my paw or holding a stick, like a wizard, to quoting what little I could from the bible and doing voodoo dances. Nothing worked. “If this is some Zen ‘find your inner strength’ bullshit, I’m gonna be so pissed…” I said, slumping down.
Here are a few questions for you. What animal do you think sleeps most of the day? Who do you think loves his sleep? What do you think I did next? Yup, I slept until noon. I’ve always had trouble with oversleeping, and my new cat form didn’t help me. It’s just so… nice. Thankfully I didn’t have another dream including Morph; I guess the guy has other stuff to do.
I once more awoke to a bump in the road. Only difference this time was that we had stopped for some reason. Were we in Baltimare already? Either that and Blatimare is the city of screams, or we’re getting attacked by bandits!
Note to self: Ponies scream loudly. Cats have sensitive ears. Watch out.
“Ow~” I held my hurting ears and peeked out on the road. Apparently a group of Diamond Dogs was rounding up the ponies from the caravan with chains. They can’t just be your everyday bandits can they? It doesn’t look like they have any particular interest in the wagons themselves. Slavers perhaps?
One of the mutts apparently had the brain capacity to grab me when I wasn’t looking. He just took my backlegs and started walking towards the rest of the group. That’s not the way to hold a cat you freaking canine! You’re doing it wrong! I hate these guys already. I think it’s in my nature as a cat to hate dogs. It’s something universal I presume.
“Found kitty.” Yes, yes, go grab your celebratory biscuit now, why don’t ya? She sniffed me (EWWWWW) and started to snicker. “Smell bad.”
“You’re the last person I want to hear that from Mr. McBadBreath!” I blurted out. Everypony/-dog stopped and stared at me. Woops… “I should have stayed quiet huh?”
“Kitty talk?!” The fat mutt to my left said.
“Yes ‘kitty talk’! And my vocabulary is a hell of alot better than yours, mongrel!” He snarled at me and leaned in close.
“What kitty say?” He said in a low voice.
I felt my inner smartass working overtime. “Let me explain it to you bub: Kitty. Talk. You. Stink.” Originality at its best, people!
All around me, the dogs had started growling at me. Only one of the more level-headed, I presume, kept watch on the captured caravan ponies. Why couldn’t Morph have sent me as a dragon or something? I wish I could torch these guys; hell just let me roar in their faces. My primal instincts were boiling over and I was starting to get pissed.
I’m a nice guy, I never get really mad. But something inside me made me really hate these dogs. I swear I was starting to see red. It was in my fit of anger that I didn’t notice the air beginning to shimmer around me. The only thing I could think of was how to beat these guys. And that’s when I realized.
I had nothing.
Literally nothing. No weapons. No backup. No illusions yet. I didn’t even have a plan. At this moment I was no stronger than a fucking cat! I couldn’t even think of a way out of this situation. The only thing I could think of was the image of me, as a dragon, roaring these mutts in their smug, ugly faces. It just wouldn’t leave me. The shimmering was getting more intense and wilder. And then it happened.
RROOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR
Just a moment ago the Diamond Dog had been holding a small black cat in his hand. He had been in complete control of the situation. Now he was holding the claw of a black dragon, flames roaring from its mouth. It was roaring in anger. He didn’t understand what was going on, but he understood enough to know that he should be terrified.
And that he was. He instantly let go of the claw and ran as fast as his legs could run, with his tail between his legs. The rest of the pack had similar reactions and bolted from the scene. Left behind was the group of ponies, and a single black cat (yours truly) on the ground.
What just happened? Was that… That was an illusion? I just looked like a fucking dragon! Holy crap, Skyrim, you can go suck it! Not just that, I had scared the dogs off. I had saved the ponies. I was from this moment their hero and they would shower me with love and- They ran away as well.
“Ok. Suddenly turning into a freaking dragon doesn’t sit well with the locals, I assume…”
I looked to my right where a sign was place on the side of the road. It read, “Baltimare: eighty miles.”
I’m not a smart cat by any means, but there’s one thing I’m sure of.
“Eighty miles is a long way on paws… Fuck.”
OK people, this might have been the most 'serious' chapter so far, but I wanted to kick-start his powers a bit. As you probably know by now, I don't focus on action as much as comedy, so stuff like this assault here won't be common. I do have a crossover planned at some point, but I can't speak for the action there.