//------------------------------//
// Ch.8 Something Lost Something Gained 
// Story: Seven Saviors 
// by Arcanum -Phantasy 
//------------------------------//

Sunset sat in the empty waiting room, nerves on high alert as she took in her surroundings. She'd never been to a therapist before, even in Equestria. Part of the reason was that she saw it as a sign of weakness or insanity that she felt was beneath her. The biggest reason though, was that she was scared. Back then, she was scared of having to come to terms with her actions, now she was scared of what would happen if she didn't get help. So far, her mental state was stable thanks to her new friends, but she knew that there was always the chance she could backslide into a second attempt at what she tried to do on the bridge. 
She flinched as she felt a hand rest on her own. 
"Nervous?" Rose Luck asked, lips turned into a gentle smile.
Sunset nodded.
Rose sighed then wrapped the teen in a calming one-armed hug.
"You have nothing to worry about. Hearths Warming is the best at what she does. Sure, her brother is a little scary, but she's the nicest person you'll ever meet."
"I heard," Sunset smiled. "Vinyl praised her when I mentioned her last night. Still a little nervous though."
Rose nodded in understanding, holding her a little tighter to help her charge relax.
"Does she know that I'm..."
"Living with us?"
"I was going to say 'an orphan'" Sunset sighed.
Rose grimaced, then said, "Most likely. Thankfully, Soprano is currently working with her mother to get you formally adopted into our family."
"Soprano?" Sunset asked, slightly familiar with the name.
"She's the Vice-Principal of The Philharmonic Music Academy. While she doesn't hold her mothers power, she does have access to a lot of powerful lawyers. At the worst, we'll be your legal guardians, but I think that would be far more preferable to having to live on the streets."
Sunset nodded, glad that her status as a ward of the state was being taken care of. Though one thing made her raise a brow.
"How are you connected to Octavia's mom?"
Rose gave the girl an impish smile, then said, "I think it would make sense that I'd be friends with the people my daughter helped in one way or another."
Sunset sighed, a weary smile gracing her lips.
"Derpy was involved in Vinyl's case, wasn't she?"
Rose nodded.
"You'd be surprised how many cases my little girl was has dipped her foot in. The second she found out how to use a computer, she made it her mission to help anyone she could. One time, she helped the cops find the evidence needed to put a serial killer behind bars by hacking into all the cameras in the city to look for any cars that matched the slimeball's description. She not only helped them find him, but gave them a trail to follow in order to find the body. It wasn't a bad debut for a twelve-year-old White Hat, don't you think?"
Sunset smiled, proud of her new friend's success, and while a small part of her was shocked that she was so skilled at such a young age, it wasn't all too surprising. Considering everything she saw the girl do in the brief time she lived with her, it would've surprised her if Derpy didn't do amazing things before they met. It did raise one question though. One that had been nagging at her off and on since she was taken in.
"Hey, you know how I was before the last Fall Formal, right?"
"I'd heard rumors," Rose frowned. "Why?"
"Well," Sunset gulped, not quite sure how to continue her question. "Back then, I was a total witch to Derpy. I would belittle her over her eyes and how clumsy she could be. I guess what I'm wondering is, why didn't she try to bring me down?"
Rose thought for a moment, then said, "If I had to guess, you weren't worth the effort."
"What?" Sunset asked, her pride slightly wounded. "I had the whole school under my thumb!"
"True, but that was just High School drama. Derpy was never the type to let that kind of thing get to her. If something a little more serious falls on her lap, then she'll attack it with everything she has, but a few mean words won't leave a dent in her armor. Compared to those twins who tried to take over Sweet Apple Orchard, a High School bully was small potatoes."
Sunset let out a sigh. When she really stopped to think about it, it did sound kind of stupid. Derpy had bigger fish to fry and Sunset was just some spoiled brat of an anchovy throwing a temper tantrum because she didn't get what she wanted. It was worse than stupid, it was pathetic.
Someone as amazing as her probably had more important things to occupy her time, she thought, a slight mope taking her features. Maybe a new muffin recipe or something.
As she thought that, an image of Derpy in the kitchen flashed through her mind. Her smiling face, covered with flower and flecks of mix as she prepared a bowl of batter. A light chuckle slipped past her lips as the mental picture played out in her mind. Something that didn't go unnoticed by her soon-to-be legal guardian.
"She can be a real goofball, right?" 
"Wha? Huh?" Sunset squeaked, a light blush coloring her cheeks. "Who do you mean?"
Rose laughed then pulled the flustered teen into a one-armed hug.
"Don't worry dear, I can keep a secret."
Sunset just grumbled, her blush still firmly plastered across her face.
At that moment, a woman dressed in a light blue blouse and dress skirt stepped into the waiting room, lips pulled into a warm smile. Her hair was a bright orange and yellow like Sunset herself, but while the teen had a peach tone to her skin, the lady that stood before her was ruby toned. She looked to be in her early thirties and maintained a graceful figure that most models would kill to have, but her posture was that of someone who didn't hold an ego to match. Instead, she gave off a kind of warmth that only a caring mother could give. The kind that let others know that everything was going to be okay. That they were loved.
"Sunset Shimmer," she asked.
Sunset nodded.
"Greetings," she smiled. "I am Miss Hearths Warming. Are you ready to get started?"
Sunset gave Rose Luck a hesitant glance, then took a deep breath and said, "Yeah, I think I am."
Hearths Warming nodded then guided Sunset through the door to her office. As they made what felt like a mile long journey, Sunset's nerves started to build again. By the time they made it to Hearths' office, she could only manage a stiff impersonation of walking. The Therapist gave her a sad smile before she placed a hand on Sunset's shoulder.
"There's nothing to worry about," she said, tone full of patient warmth. "I'm just here to listen and guide. You are the one that decides what we talk about today."
Sunset nodded, a large amount of tension suddenly melted from her frame. She was the one who had control of what goes on in the room behind that door. Within reason, of course. She was here to get help, not relive her "glory days" after all. So, with lightly shaking hands, she let Miss Warming open the door and guide her into her office.
The hour that followed was a rocky one. Not wanting to waste Miss Warming's time, she dove straight into the night she was on the bridge, and the events that led her there. Well, minus the magic of course. The last thing she needed was to be brought to a different type of Therapist at this point. That aside, it was painful for her to revisit those memories. The pain of being abandoned by those she thought were her family. The loneliness of being avoided and hated by the entire school for a crime she never committed. All of that combined with the last thing to finally push her over the edge; the cold, heartless realization that no matter what she said or did, no one would believe her. It felt like having crudely wrapped bandages torn away from an infected wound then to have alcohol pored on it. It was excruciating, but much like a disinfected gash, the pain soon gave way to comfort. A warm blanket and shelter from the cold. A game of twenty-one and an invitation of friendship. A promise of true loyalty from another damaged soul. A nerdy gift with a playful smile. Proof that one member of her former family believed her. A blast of music that rattled her to her core and brought her back to life. With each memory, each bond she allowed herself to remember, a new layer of bandages were wrapped around the wound in her heart. But it wasn't crudely slapped into place with the intent of hiding the injury. Now it was done properly and  with care. Now it could heal properly.
But even then, with what little of her heart that had already mended, a single truth was painfully obvious to the fiery  haired teen; that with the exception of Fluttershy, what she had with her former friends was dead. A fact that she knew but now, after all this time, she accepted. 



***


An endless dark void. That was all Rainbow Dash could see as she looked around. Much like every night for the past two weeks, she was tied to a chair at the center of the dark abyss. And just like every night, she wasn't alone.  Standing before her was an almost exact copy of herself. At first, the clone was completely identical to the sporty girl with the only difference between them being that the clone had her eyes covered by a black strip of cloth. But as the days went on, things changed. Little by little, the clone's skin changed from blue to a light shade of green and its hair started to change into a dark shade of yellow. The end result was a Rainbow Dash with giant patches of green covering her body and a mostly yellow head of hair, but one thing didn't change each night.
"Are ya' gonna' listen?" the clone growled as she cracked her knuckles.
Rainbow gave her copy a cold glare.
The copy's jaw clenched as she returned the favor.
"Well?"
"Fuck you," Rainbow growled.
With a furious howl, the copy slammed its fist into Dash's face. Rainbow only had enough time to spit out a tooth before another blow was delivered, this time to her chest. Again and again, blows rained down on her from all conceivable angles, all the while, the copy screamed its criticisms at the girl.
"HOW STUPID CAN YOU BE?! WHY WOULD SHE GO BACK TO HER OLD WAYS? SHE HAD EVERYTHING SHE COULD EVER NEED! SHE HAD FRIENDS! SHE HAD LOVE! SHE HAD YOU! WHY THE HELL WOULD SHE GIVE ALL THAT UP JUST TO GO BACK TO SQUARE ONE!? HOW COULD MY BEARER BE SO STUPID?!"
After what felt like an hour, the Dash clone halted her assault, her blindfolded brow frowned in barely contained anger. Dash, now a battered and bruised mess, turned her gaze up towards her copy. Her blackening eyes locked with where the blindfold hid her assailant's , defiance replaced with fear. This was the first time the copy had ever attacked her so brutally. The last few times, she would punch her once or twice while berating her for how she treated Sunset, but this was different. The copy wanted blood.
"Last chance Dash," she growled. "Give me a reason why Sunset would betray you or I'm done."
A minute of silence passed between the two. Then another. And another. With a sigh, the copy turned and walked away from the bound girl.
"Pathetic," it growled as it faded into the darkness. "Maybe my next bearer will be worth my time. See ya........traitor."
At the last second, just before the darkness consumed the clone, she saw what little bits of blue that still covered the girl finally turn green. 
With a blink, Rainbow was no longer in the void. Instead, she was lying in bed, staring at her ceiling. All of the wounds from the beating she took were left behind in the dream she had, but as she stared at her ceiling, a strange feeling washed over her. She felt as if a part of her had been removed, some piece of her soul that she had taken for granted and only then realized how precious it was. It was then, for the first time in ten years, that Rainbow Dash cried. Cried for the part of her that was gone and would never be coming back.



***



Furious scribbling filled the air of a dimly lit room as its soul occupant struggled to complete her task curled up in the corner. As she worked, a portion of her mind continued to wander to places that raised her ire. A weary sigh slipped past her lips as she reeled in her wandering thoughts only for an angry snarl to fallow when she saw what her unfocused mind had created. The dress was simple, yet designed for someone with a more athletic build that lacked the reinforcements needed for one made for Rainbow. It was elegant, while also bold enough to allow its owner to wear certain accessories that would normally clash. An accessory such as a black leather jacket.
Rarity grabbed the sketch and ripped it out of her sketchpad. With a snarl, she crumpled it and threw it into a growing pile of similar designs before she once again attempted to create a new design.
How could she betray us?! she thought as she furiously scribbled across the clean sheet of paper before her. 
"She didn't, love," a voice echoed from the walls, the contempt in it as thick as a country.
Startled, she looked around herself for the voice's source, but found nothing.
"Wh-Who said that?"
"I did," the voice said, now coming from the sketchpad .
She glanced down at her pad and what she saw made her jaw drop. Standing in the middle of the previously blank page with its arms crossed was small cartoon of herself. The only major difference aside from the size was that large parts of her were colored gray instead of white. But it wasn't the illustration's sudden appearance that shocked her. It was the fact that it was moving.
"Wha-How-HUH?!" she exclaimed.
"Not important," the mini Rarity said as she leveled a harsh glare at her larger counterpart. "What is important is how much of a total fool you have been these last few days."
"Tell me about it," she groaned, ignoring the irony of her situation. "Only a fool could've believed someone like her could ever change."
"You are right about one thing love. You were tricked, but it wasn't by that poor dear."
"Excuse me?" she exclaimed through a humorless laugh. "Clearly we are talking about different people, darling."
"Agreed," she grimaced. "I am talking about Sunset Shimmer. The one who fought tooth and nail with you to defeat the Sirens. The one who went through hell and back to earn the forgiveness of the entire student body for her past transgressions. The one who would sooner die than betray the people closest to her. Who are you talking about?"
For a moment, Rarity's anger was replaced with doubt as each of her double's points struck home. She had seen the lengths Sunset went to to prove herself. Plus, something about the whole situation had bothered her. What would Sunset stand to gain from such a stunt as this? Or was everything just a means to get revenge on those who wronged her?
Rarity shook the doubt from her mind and glared at the sentient drawing.
"Clearly the girl is an excellent actress. Not to mention opportunistic if her past deeds are anything to go by. In fact, calling her a traitor is too generous a term. To be a traitor she would've had to have been a friend in the first place."
The illustration's glare deepened for a moment, before she let out a defeated sigh.
"So that's how you choose to see her. And I thought you were the smartest among us."
"Pardon?" Rarity blinked, anger replaced with confusion.
"You are the one with the sharpest eyes and the most precise wit. Surely you noticed it too. The frayed form of her jacket. The fact that she never let you or the girls come to her place. How she never seemed to have more than five outfits. Need I continue?"
"What's your point?" she asked, brow raised. 
"Why would a person with nothing throw away what they worked so hard to get?"
Rarity stared wide-eyed at her double as all of the pieces presented to her fell into place.
"Y-You don't mean..."
"Funny," the drawing smiled sadly as a door appeared next to her. "The most generous thing you did for her was call her a traitor."
With that, what little white was left on the animated drawing was taken by the gray as it opened the door and left. The second it was gone, Rarity felt like a part of her went with her. That combined with the grief of her most resent revelation, brought tears to her eyes. Tears that fallowed her all the way to the waking world.



***



The air was heavy with the scent of apples and leaves as two figures stood in the heart of a massive apple orchard. One was a orange skinned girl with blond hair wearing a red and white flannel shirt and blue overalls. Sitting on her head was a hand made stetson style hat handed down from her father. Across from her stood a girl that looked a lot like her only with a few key differences. The figure was dressed in clothes made of a collection of leaves arranged in the same shapes as her own, minus a hat. Her hair was made of long strands of dried straw that looked as flexible as Applejack's own, but had patches of blue and pink dominating most of it. The figure's skin looked to be made of bark and was mostly cream colored with small specks of orange scattered across what parts of its body weren't covered with leaves. Its face was identical to Applejack's with the absence of a mouth being the only abnormality.
Applejack glared at the wooden effigy.
"You're wrong," she growled.
"No. Ah'm not," the tree girl replied, tone empty of emotion. "You are."
Applejack growled furiously as she stepped closer to her double.
"How else could my secret've ended up on that account? How else could those picture's've gotten out? The damn account even had her profile on it for pete's sake!"
For a moment, silence dominated the orchard, only Applejack's angered breathing serving as the only sign of life. Then, with a tone that sounded slightly disappointed, the tree girl said, "Ya' don't believe that."
Applejack flinched as if her double had slapped her and stepped back.
"If you did," it sighed. "You wouldn't be doubt'n yourself so much. You know somethin' ain't right about this. C'mon gal, get a grip of yourself and focus. Surely you can see that your being railroaded."
Applejack glared at her double, then, with venom on her tongue, said, "I'm through being a pawn fer tha' snake."
A sigh made it past the double's nonexistent lips and she gave her human counterpart a sad glance.
"Ya' took the words right out of my mouth. Y' know, they say there's no worse lie than the one's we tell ourselves. Guess you're livin' proof of that. I hope ma'h next bearer is less of a rattler."
With that, all of the remaining patches of orange on the double faded into cream and the few small patches of blond were devoured  by blue and pink. Then the figure faded away like a ghost.
A second later, Applejack awoke with a start, a tearing pain in her chest and tears streaming down her face. She knew that something was wrong, but her mind couldn't figure out what, only that what she lost was never coming back. And it was her own fault. 



***



Pinkie tossed and turned as she tried to get some sleep, but her restless mind would't let her. No matter what she did, her thoughts would drift back to that night at Sugarcube Corner. To the destroyed look in Sunset's eyes as she was yelled at by Dash. With a frustrated groan, she dragged herself out of her bed and towards her bedroom door.
"Maybe a glass of water will help," she sighed as she staggered into the kitchen.
After she pulled a glass out of a cabinet, she moved to the sink to pour herself a drink, but paused when a movement in her left peripheral got her attention. When she turned, she saw her phone sitting on the counter. Confused, she set her glass down by the sink and approached the device. When she picked it up, she saw that a video was paused on it. Curious, she tapped the play icon on the screen. What she saw made her blood turn into ice. On the screen was someone that looked like Sunset standing on the guardrail of a bridge, a look of absolute despair on her face as she gazed upon the frigid water below. Pinkie watched with wide eyes, breaths coming out in gradually faster panicked gasps as a stone began to grow in her gut. Silently, she prayed that what she thought was going to happen wouldn't, but a large part of her knew what was coming. Then, with dead eyes closed, the girl jumped. It was at that point that Pinkie lost her grip, both on the phone and her stomach as she dropped the device and ran to the sink, her most recent meal decorating its interior. For a moment, she just stood there with her head over the sink, shaking as she waited for the shock to work its way out of her system. Still shaking, she managed to gain enough control of herself to move away from the sink. What greeted her was no more of a comfort than the phone had been.
Standing five feet away from her was a girl that looked like her, but with many noticeable differences. The girl's hair was long and straight with many tangles running through it. Her features were frail and bony, as if she hadn't eaten in months with only a thin layer of will keeping her standing. Her eyes were sunken into her skull with heavy black rings surrounding them like rotting flesh.  Her thin, dry, lips were pulled into a quivering frown as she stared at Pinkie as with bare feet she approached her, a single, shaking question aimed at her.
"Why did you take her smile?"
"N-No! G-G-Get back," she stammered as she backed away from the emaciated clone. 
The staggering pat of bare feet behind her drew her attention away from the clone only for her to notice another one walking towards her from the other end of the kitchen. Panicking, she shifted her attention back to the first clone only to see five more had appeared, all of them asking the same question. Paralyzed with fear, she watched as more clones oozed out of the shadows of the kitchen to join the mob already present. Soon, she was completely surrounded, "Why did you take her smile?" repeated like a depressed mantra as Pinkie trembled in absolute terror. Eventually, it all became too much for her and with tears in her eyes she screamed, "I WAS SCARED!!!"
The clones stopped their chanting and stared at the now sobbing girl.
"I was scared that she had gone back to her old ways! I was scared that all the fun we had was a lie! I was scared that the smile she would always show us was fake and that we weren't really friends!"
For a moment, the only sound in the kitchen was the sound of  Pinkie sobbing, but that didn't last long.
"So that was it?" a voice identical to Pinkie's said, mild irritation decorating it. "You were scared?"
Pinkie turned her head towards were she heard the voice and gasped. Standing just outside the sea of clones stood a copy that looked significantly more healthy than the rest with the only other differences being most of its body being white with only a small bundle of pink patches noticeable among the two tone blue locks on its head. The clone glared at her while the others crept back into the shadows, leaving the two alone in the room.
"How scared do you think Sunset was?" it growled. "The whole school hates her and you turned your back on her. You are supposed to bring smiles to people, not take them away. You were scared? GOOD! A GUTLESS COWARD LIKE YOU DESERVES TO BE AFRAID!!!"
Pinkie flinched at her discolored doppelgäner's tirade, more tears flowing down her face.
"You know," the clone continued with a sigh. "I thought maybe you had a better reason for abandoning a friend, but now I see that I was wrong about you. You really are just a waste of time. Goodbye."
With that, what was left of Pinkie's colors on the clone melted away as she blinked. When her eyes opened she was in her bed staring at the ceiling. As she laid there, tears streamed down her face. She didn't move. She hardly breathed. She didn't do anything. It hurt far too much to do anything but weep.



***



Fluttershy sat on her bed, a dull glaze in her eyes. Laying on the bed next to her was a large pile of knives of various sizes. Slowly, her head turned towards the pile and her lips contorted into a faint grimace. Almost mechanically, she grabbed one of the larger steak knives, then jammed it into her right thigh. She pushed hard to push the blade deeper and deeper into her leg until only the handle was visible above her skin. The pain should've been extreme, but only equated to getting a pinch on the shoulder. Her grimace grew as she grabbed  another knife and jammed it into her leg. Again, the pain was minimal compared to what the blade should've delivered. She repeated this again and again, until her whole right leg was covered with knife handles. By this point a frustrated glare covered her face as she reached for yet another knife.

"Not enough," she muttered as she aimed her new blade at her left thigh. "She suffered so much more than this."
Just as she was about to bring the blade down, a gray hand grabbed it and held it in place.
"That's enough!" the hand's owner said, drawing the damaged girls gaze away from her leg.
What she saw was a copy of herself, only completely gray with blond hair and golden eyes.
"You don't need to do this anymore," she said, tears falling from her eyes as she gently took the knife from Fluttershy. "You don't need to suffer anymore. You have already been forgiven. You have already proven yourself to her."
Fluttershy shook her head.
"No. I know how badly I hurt her. I know how awfully I treated her. I deserve so much more than this."
"No, you don't," before Fluttershy could respond, the gray girl pulled her into a tight embrace.
"You accepted your failings. You tried to help Meme Queen find the true criminal. You chose to become one of her protectors. And now you want to make it up to her. If you want to do that, this isn't the way to go about it."
"Then how?" Fluttershy asked, voice coming out in slight sobs.
With a sad smile, the gray duplicate released her and said, "Through forgiveness. You need to forgive yourself for your failings and strive to move forward to better yourself. Only then can you truly make amends for your past. Unfortunately, I no longer have the power to guide you, but someone else does."
As she said that, another figure entered the room. This one also looked like Fluttershy, but only in the most basic of senses. She shared the timid girl's skin and hair colors, but instead of clothes, this version of her was covered in light silver armor. Strapped to her left hip was an ornate rapier with a fine jet-black leather sheath. The copy's eyes were a bright ruby red with slitted pupils that held a strength that Fluttershy didn't feel matched a person with her face. The gray Fluttershy smiled then approached her armored counterpart.
"I leave her in your hands," she smiled.
"I will not fail," the armored copy said with a slight bow.
With that, the gray Fluttershy turned towards the wounded original and said, "So long. And good luck." before she faded away. Once the first copy disappeared, the second one approached her. 
"As she said," it said, glaring at the knives still planted in Fluttershy's right leg. "These will not be necessary."
With a wave of her armored hand, the knives disappeared  with not even a trace that they were ever there to begin with. Fluttershy stared at her healed limb in amazement before she stared up at the knight that stood before her from her seat on the bed.
"I will not lie," the knight sighed. "The path of forgiveness is not an easy one. It will be long and hard. You will stumble and fall, but only you can choose to stand back up. Will you stand to walk this hazardous road?"
"Will you be my guide?" she asked, a trace of strength in her tone.
The knight smiled, then said, "To the end and beyond, milady."
With that, Fluttershy rose to her feet and with a fire in her teal eyes that matched the rubies of her knight's said, "Yes." as the shy teen took her first steps on the path of true forgiveness.



***



All was peaceful in the Castle of Friendship's second floor library. At its heart sat a lavender Alicorn enjoying a bit of late night reading. Or at least, that was the plan. At random points, her gaze would drift away from her book towards the portal ten feet away from her desk. For the last few days, she felt that something was wrong. At first, she shook it off as her over thinking things. But as the days passed, the feeling only grew. She couldn't explain it, but she knew that something had happened on the other side of the portal. Sunset's last message didn't make her feel any better, mostly due to the fact that it was the only message she received from her since the feeling started.
Maybe I should go take a look. Just to make sure she's okay
No sooner had the thought entered her head did she suddenly find herself wrapped in the coils of the God of Chaos's body. Anything beyond a startled yelp was blocked as he clamped his lion's paw over her muzzle. It was then that she saw the look of sheer terror plastered across his face. That fact alone turned her blood into ice. 
"Talk later," he cried, as with a snap of his free fingers, both he and the Princess of Friendship vanished.
For a moment, only silence filled the room, but then came the heat. It was subtle at first, a slight rise in temperature that some would consider pleasant in the frigid winter weather. That didn't last long as soon, blank sheets of paper started to curl and smolder. Then the few candles in the room started to melt. Then, a massive torrent of white-hot flames erupted from the middle of the library, completely obliterating anything not protected by Twilight's magic. Just as suddenly as its arrival, the flame geyser vanished and in its place stood Princess Celestia. Her normally flowing mane and tail fell limp, the excess magic that normally animated them being put to other uses. Her jaw was set in a furious clench as her eyes, wide with fury and shrunken pupils, scanned the room. Finally, they settled on the portal and her brow furrowed.
"There will be no ashes to mourn," she snarled, her voice echoing with power. "That I PROMISE!!!"