//------------------------------// // Chapter 24: Butt Then ... // Story: Applejack's Butt // by Vedues //------------------------------// Twilight’s school had been a great idea, in theory. Even having Applejack and the others teach had made sense. In theory. Applejack didn’t want to brag or anything, but her group of friends had saved the world through friendship and teamwork more than once. They understood what it meant for a group of very different ponies to work together. So yeah, theoretically, everything should’ve been fine. In reality, six mares with full-time jobs were left scrounging for free time to teach classes. Heck, Dash had two full-time jobs between weather manager of Ponyville and her career as a Wonderbolt. The solution they’d come up with was for each of the six Element Bearers to take turns taking a day off their regular work to teach at the school. Applejack walked into her class that morning feeling calm and focused. She knew exactly what she wanted to teach, and it was a lesson every creature needed to learn. “Settle down, everyone. Yes, I know it’s Saturday, but talking up a storm is just gonna make it take longer before you can get on with enjoying the weekend.” The class soon fell silent, with creatures of all different races staring at her expectantly. Applejack walked up to the board and wrote ‘Honesty.’ “Being honest means a whole heap of a lot more than just telling the truth. I can tell the truth and still be as dishonest as you like. For example, I am completely hairless … but only on this one scar.” She pointed to a round mark on her foreleg. “I was whipping around an apple tree too fast and tripped. Jammed a stick right into my leg and had to have a doctor yank it back out.” Some members of the class winced, others acted like they weren’t impressed. “The point is,” Applejack continued, “saying things that are technically true can still be lies if you leave out important info and let others draw the wrong conclusions. It’s the same with avoiding saying things. Just because you ain’t fibbing doesn’t mean you’re being honest. So be sure to ask yourself once in a while if you’re being honest with others, and especially with yourself.” She turned to the class. “Any questions?” Yeah, it was a short lesson, but she’d rather focus on one important idea and learn everything she could about it. Ocellus, the changeling, lifted her hoof. “Is it dishonest to avoid bringing up parts of yourself that you aren’t proud of?” “She’s got a point,” the griffon said. Gallus, if Applejack remembered right. “I mean, do you really expect us to walk around saying crap like, ‘Hi, I’m Gallus, I hate most ponies, and I’m probably going to hate you too. So anyway, how’s it going?’” Applejack shook her head. “Honest ain’t about shoving your whole life story down the throat of every creature you meet. It’s about telling others the truthful things they deserve to know about, even when it’s hard on both of you. There ain’t a solid rule for what you should and shouldn’t tell others, but you’ll know you’re being dishonest when you feel that guilt in your chest, weighing you down.” “Even if it’s embarrassing?” Gallus asked, a faint smirk on his beak. “Even then,” Applejack said. Gallus’s smirk turned into a full grin. “Really? Then is it true Sketchy, that crazy pony from Griffonstone, moved to Ponyville, and that you’re modeling adult art for him now?” Applejack froze. “You, uh, you know Sketchy?” “Every griffon in Griffonstone knew about him.” Gallus leaned back in his desk. “But you haven’t answered my question yet.” There were times when Applejack really wasn’t a big fan of that griffon. Right then, for instance. “Fine, yup, I’m modeling for him as a favor between friends.” She smiled. “And he ain’t crazy. A bit different, sure, but I count myself lucky to know him.” Gallus rolled his eyes. “So you’re okay with a bunch of ponies staring at your … whatever it is ponies find sexy? Maybe you could bring in a few samples for us.” Be the bigger pony, Applejack told herself, or the bigger creature. Whatever. She took a deep breath. “Gallus, do you want detention?” “What?” He spread his arms. “I was just asking an honest question.” “So am I,” Applejack said. “You’re going out of your way to embarrass and annoy me. If that ain’t begging for detention, I don’t know what is. So I figured I’d jump right to the point and ask if you’re sure you want it.” She smiled sweetly. “I’d be happy to oblige.” Gallus looked away. “Fine, forget I said anything.” That purple hippogriff gasped. “Wait, can ponies and griffons forget things on command? What if you accidentally forgot the wrong thing?” Applejack sighed. “No, ponies can’t forget stuff just like that. If we could, then trust me, I would’ve kick plenty of sights out of my noggin by now.” Some images of Spoiled Rich came to mind. “Anyway, are there any other questions-” The door to the classroom burst open and Rainbow Dash … well, dashed through. “Applejack, Sketchy’s in trouble!” “What kind of trouble?” Applejack asked immediately. Dash looked at the students then back to Applejack. “Maybe we should talk outside?” Applejack hurried out into the hall with Dash and shut the door behind her. “What happened?” “Nothing at first,” Dash said. “The show was fine. I was awesome, of course, and Sketchy was having a great time right up until it was time to sign autographs. You see, Celestia kinda showed up because she wanted to ask how things were going in Ponyville, and Sketchy was there too, and-” “He didn’t,” Applejack said. “He did.” Dash scratched the back of her neck. “So he kinda got dragged off by Celestia and her guards, and I couldn’t get a clear answer from anypony about what they were going to do to him.” Applejack kicked the door to her class open. “Class dismissed.” Then she took off running for the exit.