//------------------------------// // Chapter 19: Starlit Field // Story: Once More, with Feeling // by Amaranthine Thought //------------------------------// Twilight was not used to dealing with potent emotions. For the most part, her life had been free of any real strife. And nothing came close to the pain of losing Trixie, worsened by the circumstances surrounding that loss. However, that was not to say that she had no way to handle those emotions. In fact, she knew several that would help her. Long ago, she would rely on her brother or mother to help her recover, and rarely Princess Cadence. She had continued that practice as she grew older, but soon adopted another pony to rely upon: Princess Celestia. And newly joining was Princess Luna, but Twilight knew she couldn’t, for one reason or several, use those options. So, that left two others that she could use. The first that came to mind was actually Spike. Why was not something she knew particularly well, but his presence always encouraged her to be stronger. Those few times when she had held him after he had some nightmare had been some of the calmest and best nights she could think of. However, Spike would react poorly, as he had stopped coming to her bed since years ago. On the other hoof, she could always watch him sleep, and gain a smaller, though still effective, relaxant. Yet, that too, posed some potential problems, so Twilight decided not to, at least not right then. So came her last refuge: It wasn't anything particularly special. Just a particular spot in a particular field overlooking Ponyville. She had taken to going there for stargazing, due to its geography making it higher than the surrounding places, and had memorized a particular spot. Isolated, fairly flat, and with the best location for seeing the sky and beyond. It was a nice place to go to be alone with your thoughts. Sitting there, and looking up at the moon and stars, would help her to balance her emotions, and calm herself. So she did so, sighing as she gazed up. The moon was bright overhead, and seeing the stars, her stars, did begin easing the shock and pain. She thought: Her pain stemmed from the failure to save Trixie. The tension in trying crashing down, and the awareness of the fate she would face made that worse. Thinking about the fear and pain she must have been in and will soon be in… Stop that. There was and is no gain in focusing on… horrible subjects. Think positive. So, what was positive about not saving Trixie..? Well… Perhaps they hadn’t been able to save Trixie. However, that was not truly the end, was it? Twilight would have to find and guide her, and when she did so, she would be assured that she would be able to talk with the blue unicorn, and allow the others to do the same. It wasn't the same as saving her, but allowing her to pass not in turmoil, but in peace, was second best. And she could likely think of something more for her; some final request to fulfill or something. Help Trixie pass on with no regrets, or at least as few as was possible. Though… there was something more to that, wasn’t there? It had been death that had given her the knowledge of the ghouls, how they behaved, and what she could expect. And yet, when she had felt lost, when she had felt desperate enough to try and talk to him with her friends right there… He had turned his back on her. Left her alone to face what would come. Wouldn’t he have been able to just tell her where the ghoul was, actually? He knew where all the ghosts were, and had even warned her about Night Light. He knew where the ghoul had been, hadn’t he? He must have known it was digging, known it had grabbed Trixie, and known where it was hiding! And he hadn’t told her anything! Nothing except just enough to let her get really close and fail! Twilight frowned, glaring at the sky. Twilight. “…I want an explanation.” she near hissed. “You let her die, didn’t you?” Death said nothing, and Twilight growled faintly, her pain almost gone from anger now. “You could have let me save her!” she yelled. “I could have done something! You could have just told me where,” Twilight. Death interrupted, his tone freezing her in place once more. She shuddered and shook herself as he continued to speak. My knowledge over my domain is perfect, as you surmised. I am fully aware of the dead, be they ghost or more. When a life ends, I am granted knowledge of them, so as to ease my task of collection and aid in granting them rest. I know where they are, and what they want, and who they once were. Twilight growled again, stomping. “Then why did you lie to me?!” she yelled, recalling earlier, though she herself was mostly unable to deny why: she would have done something bad if he hadn’t. “Why aren’t you helping me anymore!?” she added, focusing on that instead. I see you have finally noticed that my aid is slowly fading. That, more and more, I let you find solutions on your own, and do not whisper the correct answer in your ears. Can you not see the reason why, Twilight? Twilight shook her head, sure there wasn't one. Your first steps were trembling and unsure. After, you were surrounded by problems as you still grew used to your new life. However, as the days passed, you found your own answers, and made your own choices. More and more, you did not need my help to give you words or understanding. By the time you were about to leave Canterlot, you no longer required my aid to live. Twilight blinked, thinking, remembering. I shall aid you enough to save you from Lux’s bonds, and grant you enough to ease your pains. Grant you my cold to allow you to act with mind, and not emotion. Enough knowledge to insure you do not do something that cannot be undone. But whispering every secret to your ear would be to deny you your life. To have me tell you the answers would cripple your ability to find them on your own. To have me guide your every step would soon see you never take a step alone. You are a reaper, Twilight, but first, you are alive. I speak to you of your duty, give you enough to save you, but in the end, I cannot deny your life. As you become stronger, my aid becomes less. As you master the power you hold, as you master the power I granted you, the time will come when you might never hear my voice again, for you shall have no need of it. Twilight didn’t respond, looking up at the stars above. Thinking. It… actually sort of felt like growing up. A parent, guiding every hoofstep, only to ever so slowly back away, and allowing the growing child to stand on their own, to make their own choices, to, one day, live their own life. Learning from those who knew so much more than you, but the day would come that you would no longer need their lessons. “…Master?” she asked softly. “…I’ll still be able to hear and talk to you, even then, right?” Yes, Twilight. She nodded, relaxing faintly. “It almost sounded like you can’t make choices on your own.” Beyond my own domain, I cannot. And within, there is but one correct action for me. The choices I might make are very few. Would you find it interesting to know that you are the sole thing that has given me cause to wonder what to do? Twilight chuckled at that. “Just me? Really?” No other reaper holds life. The distinction is automatic and obvious, Twilight. She nodded, feeling… better. A little happy, ready to help again, ready to resume her work. However, I will warn you of this, Twilight: More and more, you attract attention. Those who fear the rest, or fear what you represent as a new alicorn, watch you carefully from hidden places. They do so even now. Twilight tensed faintly, looking around. Beware, Twilight. The dead despise the living, but that is not to say that they will not work together… Twilight nodded, worried now as she kept looking. It was a big field, and it was dark, but even so, hiding nearby would be hard, right? There was no way anything even a tenth the size of a pony could hide nearby and watch her… “Where is it, master?” she asked him. A moment passed, and then, use your power to feel the area. You shall know. She nodded, unsure, and cast her magic out. Once more, finding it similar to grabbing the sky, she felt the grass as her grip spread farther and farther… until she felt something. She focused on that, and in a cloud of her magic, grabbed it and lifted. And then nearly screamed as a single eye came into view with what looked like a long red tail, or possibly its optical nerve, writhing in her grip. It stopped after a moment, and fixed on her. It watches you, and what it sees is known far away. Many see through this eye. Her focus broken, it dropped, and she heard it squelch, and could just make out the grass moving as it… wiggled away at high speed. She swallowed, disgusted, worried, and feeling watched even still. If you linger in places where they can hide, you can be assured there will be at least one watching. Even within Ponyville, they shall watch. Your foes are many, Twilight, but the owner of the eyes is the worst of them. Beware the living that aids the dead. Beware he that stirs graves, and he that hides in darkness. Beware he that calls to the specter and banshee, he that makes bargains with ghouls and geists, he that summons nightmares and crawling horrors. Beware he that has stolen my power. Beware the necromancer. Beware The Waker. Twilight shuddered, ripples of dread and fear rippling through her as Death spoke. She felt disgusted and horrified: an eye, an actual eye, just a single eye with a tail that was all too much like an actual optical nerve, had been watching her. And it likely had resumed doing so, or another one had taken its place! And now she knew for certain: Waker was alive. He was back, and he knew about her. He was watching her. She didn’t feel safe. She shuddered once more, and vanished from the field. The grass near where she had been began rustling as many things began moving toward Ponyville.